₦airaland Forum

Steady259:
Some comments in this discussion is fueled out of hatred and jealousy for which indicates that the OP is doing well in life and other unfortunate guys, instead of keeping mute when they have no tangible thing to contribute will rather wish the OP bad and dish out wrong advice.....

Bros OP, 3 indicators you need to look out for in a lady to have certainty of a peaceful home

Make sure she loves you more than you love her

She must be very submissive and loyal.

Virgin, good mannered, not temperamental, and educated..


Bro you can adjust and groom every other aspect to your taste and perfection if you have the virtue of a patient man.

Thanks

flexxyworld:
Do all these for adult ? Even while the man is also fighting for his life. You guys should always be fair.

@op. My only piece of note is, you can't change anyone, don't even try or think you can, change can only come from within. That kind of lady will run down any business you open for her, she just want her man to be everything while she finds every excuse not to be responsible. Do you wanna raise kids like her or with her, is that the kinda kids you wish or want, a woman that doesn't have a drive, in this new world. She will also not be smart enough to have a convo with. It is so much and might exhaust you with time.

Thanks

Lanmon:
There are some positives in what I've read and there are the green and red lights u here blinking
Now u already know she's not productive, no goals she's very probably heading to being a full-time house wife and will depend on u 100 percent for needs even from her family(no forget o)
Now my question for u is "are u capable of handling her needs, ur needs, the needs of ur future family with her, her family's needs ND ur family too...if yes go ahead n I pray u are more successful than u ever imagined but if no please look for another lady who is productive.

Peace be unto u✌️

God bless you

Sandralight:
It's obvious you are a very ambitious person and your girlfriend is not.
She is not bad, not everyone is goal driven and some ladies grow up with the mindset that the man should provide all their needs and no matter what you do, you can't change that.
From my perspective I think your girlfriend will hardly change, you will keep pushing and pushing until you are tired and even if she does something now once she start giving birth she might use that as an excuse to stop doing any work so if you want to be with her just know you might take 100% of the responsibility and if that's not to your liking you can break up now.

Ask yourself whether you like her enough to take care of all her responsibilities or you just like her because from your post she is a virgin and she loves you.

Thank you

Oluromantic:
My advice is to give a little more push. I'm saying this because, most resourceful ladies too might also find it difficult to submit. I know there may be a lot of ranting and criticisms about submission but I'm giving you a honest advice as a realist for your future. Nothing makes you fulfilled than to have a resourceful wife that allows you to be in charge which is very rare. Once they can work hard on their own, submission with their money gradually slides out...it's psychological.

Now considering the fact that you can't find all you need in one person, you have to weigh your options which emphasizes the role of grooming. Grooming means training her to your taste or standard. I bet you it might not be a sweet experience at first but it's worth it. The point is you're not ready yet,when you're ready, you will drill her seriously. Your love for her is the fuel. I did it for my wife. Anything that gives you peace of mind as you said that she has good character, should be seriously guided and guarded. Only few women will give you such peace despite their imperfections.

Now, start from a small level, get her a shop if you can afford it to start selling provisions or likely things and monitor her totally so far she's not pissed to say you're domineering. In my case, my wife enjoyed my control and it made it easy for me. She said she likes the disciplinary love and that someone is mad over her. Now she's super productive, she even charge me for her services and collects her money promptly. Business is business. I trained her.

...

Thanks, but what if she doesn't learn....?

siofra:
Break up with her. Shikena!

You both are not compatible, what more do you want to hear again

Leave her, let her find a provider, generous husband that she can depend on 100% I don't know why stingy men like to make women suffer.

Of all the things I wrote, the only thing you understood was that I am a stingy man. Well done

Firstly, I am a guy who is goal driven. I work my ass off to ensure that I earn a living and this has left me with hating anyone who is lazy.
I met my fiance about a year ago. We don't reside in the same town but we talk everyday. When we started dating, she had told me she was done with schooling but she had a few issues which have prevented her from graduating. According to her, she finished in 2019 but has not been cleared because of those issues.

In the first few months that we started dating, I asked her why she was idle since the school was yet to clear her. I further advised that she should start something rather than stay at home. She told me then that she would like to produce and sell a particular commodity. I asked her what it required for her to start. She told me and I provided those things and travelled all the way to see her and hand those items over to her. Few weeks after that, I asked how the business was doing - she went from one story to the other. I was pissed because I thought she could have put all those excuses into consideration before letting me go through the stress of providing those items - It is not about the money for it wasn't much, but her lukewarm interest in pursing goals. Truth is that she never started the trade.

I let that slide and we moved on... Each day I noticed she doesn't have the desire to pursue goals. I mean, how could she have stayed over 3years at home without learning any skill or being purposeful. When it was clear that she wasn't being purposeful, I told her crystal clear that I would not want to be with anyone who lacks purpose or isn't resourceful. In response, she told me that she would work harder and do something. But as each day passed, it was the same old story. Right now, she teaches at a school - this was after a lot of pushing, and forcing and begging and all of that. Even, of the teaching, she complains that it is stressful.

She visited my family house twice. The first time she visited, I had to literally tell her to help in the sweeping of the house the morning following the night she arrived, which she did - I mean, I expected her to know (without being told) that that was expected of her as a first-time visitor in the frame of a prospective wife/in-law. Even as a man, you don't stay inside the room when you visit a family especially when they are doing chores - that was how I was raised. Maybe it isn't a general expectation, but that was how I was raised (Don't crucify me).

As it stands now, she isn't cleared yet and each time I tell her to go to the school, she would either reply reluctantly or get upset. Moreso, she doesn't have a skill. The truth is that, though she is nice, a virgin apparently, she may end up depending on me 100%. Given the way Nigeria is, one needs a partner who can support one. Also, coupled with the fact that though she loves me 100%, she is not very exposed (a bit timid), and lacks the desire to be independent, hardworking or achieve her own goals.

We had discussed marriage, though I have not proposed yet. Conversely, right now, I am having a rethink which has caused me to be a bit withdrawn and retrogressive. I do not want a spouse who would drag me backwards, I have suffered a lot to get to where God placed me - I don't want a setback given that my family partly depends on me. From all indications, I don't know whether she will be able to handle and account for a business if one is established for her.

Even though the decision to either proceed with or withdraw from marriage is solely mine, I'd like a piece of advice.

For matured folks.... What do you think?

Hambivert:
Messi is a mastermind in guilt tripping organisations, he did so with Barcelona when he decided not to commit to a new contract and wanting out of the club because he thought him stalling would make them give him a bigger offer. Then he decided to leave, but when he saw it may lead to a brutal court battle he didn't envisage in his plan, he pulled the curtains and stopped his antics.
Surprisingly, he agreed to a salary cut, someone that wanted a raise...but his exorbitant wage had made Barcelona insolvent already.

I guess that's what he wanted to do with PSG, but he forgot the owners of PSG are major stakeholders in the Arab world which he thought he would use again for guilt tripping.

Now he must apologise, big clubs can't afford his excesses anymore.

See as you calm down dey analyze rubbish....... Your hate for Messi stinks

JOBS - YOU NO CREATE, ENABLING ENVIRONMENT - YOU NO CREATE. YOU ARE A TOTAL MISFIT FOR ANY DEMOCRACY.

Dey play... Just dey play.... Person wey don suffer for house for years come see work, the first thing of interest na salary... any other thing concern you.

Coolestguy2023:
Chimamanda is an illitrate bigot that shouldn't be taken serious but her madness have been adequately addressed.
You can be learnered and still be stupid just like her

You wey dey learned, we don see you and the rubbish wey you write. Next!

All this grammar on top small bread and beans wey I chop? Nawa o

GOTVee:
Even though I'm a born again Christian, i apologize to Nigerians of other faiths on behalf of we Nigerian Christians for the shameful Yes Daddy phone call allegedly made by Peter Obi. Such doesn't represent the position of we Christians and never again shall we present such a divisive candidate for future elections. Congratulations to President Elect Bola Tinubu, may your reign bring prosperity for we Christians in Jesus name. Amen.

You are deluded.

Hambivert:
If Messi moves to Al-Hilal, it would be their biggest financial undoing. Sparogatively, I would like him to go, I'll like to see stubborn people learn the hard way.
The only safe side for them would be that these Arabs aren't for the investment to better their club, what they are after is the feel good effect of signing a star player. But this time, the feel-good effect would end as soon as it starts for them or anyone that still opts for Messi.

The truth is, if Ronaldo was in this same PSG with this same squad, the fans would never boo him because they would be so engrossed in shouting Suiiiii instead of boo all the time.

God bless Di Maria, the true but unsung hero of Argentina.

Anti-Messi fan spotted.

Abia is worse than you met it. Weakling of a man.
Abians can't wait for you to leave office.



For those who may come after me, this man cannot walk the streets of Aba without being lynched.

thesicilian:
These people will give Messi any award just to prove that he's better than Ronaldo. But the fact remains that Cristiano Ronaldo is miles ahead. If he can achieve all he has done with all the resistance and hatred from FIFA and UEFA, then imagine the heights possible if there was a level playing field.
Even if they make Messi their lord and personal saviour it still doesn't change anything
Nonsense and it's ingredients!

Have you paused for a second to think about what you and others of your kind say concerning every football body favouring Messi?

My question is... Why do you think they all favour Messi?
Messi is not even European, let alone, too handsome..
Messi plays football in all these competitions just like thousands of other players.
What is the rationale for thinking he is favoured?

Lemos14:
The fact that everyone else understood and its only you that came to ask a stupid question shows who is the uneducated one here. My last response to you.

Better for you.

The fact that no one, except you, objected my submission shows that you can read but you lack the intellect to assimilate.

Get educated. Ignorance and pride are disastrous when they work together.

Lemos14:
When you're in a hole stop digging...in your attempt to sound smart/educated you just exposed your folly..shut up and rest.

If you can't tell that the statement is grammatically incorrect and contextually wrong at the same time, you and I should neither be in the same conversation nor have a conversation.


It is - When you are in a hole, stop digging. I'm sure you skipped class when Punctuation was taught.

Lemos14:
What you need to do is take English lessons instead of embarrassing yourself

I am sure you need English language lessons, but I won't give you for free.

OfficialAPCNig:
That is the reason they want to dismantle PDP and APC structure of criminality.

This is Sango Ota, in Ogun State

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H6EcoMKdopE

Anyways, here is ABA they hate so much


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWX-cruI6fU

More on Aba


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKWC24y1G9M

More on Aba


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPzYb1WWoc8

Sey u dey whine me ni....

Lemos14:
If it was seyi vibez that died you think " mother of singer" will be included there?

Ignorance will not let you keep quiet....

Na who die?... Seyi vibes abi his mum?

Nairaland and poorly constructed captions be like 5&6...

samfrancis1:
. You people go just talk like fool.. like didirin. You learn at all.. how’s has Lagos state been in your hand.. na easterner deh govern there.. na una erect infrastructure for there.. how man roads then don construct for Lagos state.. the place was made habitable.. and opened for investors.. how your hand take deh there.. yes una buy land build house.. dem let una use some market.. na na there noisemplenty pass.. ne there una for deh extort una self anyhow… mumu

What do you even know?

Pleasant01:
Did they come to beg you to build houses here? You saw that building house here is better than building it in your region.....and you keep talking like we came to beg you

America that is home to people from different parts of the world no dey as proud as SW people. Lagos that was built by Portuguese, the benefits of once being a Federal capital Territory and the investments of non-indigenous members.

As if Lagos would be what it is if it were left in your hands... Look at other SW states that have a low percent of migrants and do the math.

[quote author=Saidfx post=121672839][/quote]And you think Lagos would be what it is without migrants?

Do you have any idea how much the Igbo has invested in Lagos?

How many people from the SW have houses in the SE? There seems to be few or even none.

For those of you saying he can't do it.... bla bla bla... He has no experience... bla bla bla .... How will he generate funds..? bla bla bla...


Have you governed before? Why do you think you know more than he does? Do you think he didn't do proper consultations before publishing that statement?


Gerat jaare


It always seems impossible until it is done.

If you think you know more, kindly tell us what you will do to make Lagos better....

Normally, Tiwa dey enter eye...

Normally, president fit this man o... Simple and attentive.

Sometimes I wonder why those bastards were created..... Forget food chain abeg.. Rats can frustrate one's life.

Segzy19:
E go soon reach you since you are linking everything to politics...

Na you wey vote APC dey fear....

Since INEC declared Tinubu president-elect, na bad news we dey receive.... God abeg o

one by one e don dey clear for their eyes.... the certificate wey dem give Tinubu na prank o....