₦airaland Forum

nbright: Girls, this is a piece of advice free of charge from me to you all.. When u do get married, NEVER you try to take a side when ur husband and his family members are having any form of dispute... NEVER u try that... When they talk bad about u, keep quiet.. I'm talkin from experience... If u do pick a side and we all know u will stick to ur man, what do u think will happen when they settle the misunderstanding?... I learnt that from my mum... Be friendly to his family members... If you can't just pretend to be untill u are rooted into his life... N.B: You are all free to criticize me but that's how I see it... It worked for my mum so I believe in it..

Thanks for the advice,noted.

nbright: HAPPY SUNDAY

A happy sunday to you too

Maya2pretty: Carmy loveee, he's lookin 4 u tirelessly and on dat day d Lord has written, he'l find u and u'l know it's him cos d both of u would connect so strongly, no one would believe u just met, dont 4get 2 send me a weddin invite though :*

Thanks doll,You will surely get an invite

Maya2pretty: @ Carmy doll, ave made 1 or 2 mistakes in relationships but I c it as a learnin process. Marriage is a very delicate issue, it's not like a relationship dat u can break off so we have to be very certain about it wit confirmation from God 1st of course. We only c d outward and present but he sees d inward heart and d future, just tell God 2 make dat decision 4 u, he'l confirm it 2 ur spirit, if it's right u'l have 100% peace about it, without any doubts or worry, I wish u d best of all u wish urself

Thanks Doll

HumbledbYGrace: Evening

How have you been dear,?longest time.hope you re good?

passionate88: wow... So I dey give u difficulties since u just dey hide am?... Mehn... I happy say u talk am o.. Nw I go try to dilute am.. Mixture of broken (pure) english and pidgin..

Thanks.

passionate88: na d million kobo qstn b that.. U dn use up 1 life line.. Ur remaining life line na either u guess or u ask.. So what's ur answer?.

Lol,I want to ask the audience.But on a more serious note ,if that was what he meant,then where is the love if he can't confide In me and tell me his worries.

You see why I needed time for us to know each other well?Time reveals things you know.We were not connected ,if not I would not be in the dark wondering" why the rush"?,living under assumptions,asking questions on NL.

It is not just about the 'MRS',I need a friend as husband,we can manage together ss long as there is love and happiness between us.Is that too much to ask?

xyoung: @cameldoll
Sorry to look at ur proposal from another angle
I think one of the reasons you didn't feel any spark is because of his financial status ie no car, no house etc
The thing is that girls don't like saying the truth but if this so-called guy had a prado and a nice house with styles, I think you will have a rethink if even the rush situation is more pressurised. Offcourse I know all the dolls will wanna pick a fight with me here but let the truth be said, you refused his proposal because you think (girls always think) that a better, richer and more stylish person will come
Sorry I don't mean any disrespect to you camelion
JUST MY HUMBLE OPINION

Xyoug,I don't know what you ve been through in the past but I want you to know that every Woman is not the same.

Obviously,you did not read the story completely.You missed the part where I said,that those things(a ride & a house )are not too much for him to afford.But he wants his business to grow first which is a wise decision.

I don't know if you read the part where I said he has been outside the Nigerian for a long time,he just came. Back back 3yrs.Let me tell you I have seen some of his pictures he took there.The type of ride he had then,has not be seen in Nigeria(because of our road).He sold most things and came to home to invest.His business is still at its begining stage but I know he will make it.

Mr Xyoung,there is more to marriage than money.As for this your view about women and material things,just pray to your God for "your own woman".The wrong ladies would stop coming your way.

xyoung: Remember you just mentioned on this copy that your friend bf bought her a samsung galaxy tab. Really a great highlight of the valentine. This is in addition to my contribution upward.
@carmelion...I like the way you put things here.. You are a real woman
But I want you dolls to confirm this statement for me.
I Just need a confirmation that this is what Nigerian girls believe
Jus a confirmation of this
"There is no time for guys with prospect, we need guys with present"

Yes I mentioned all that I did on Valentines Day.Telling you about my friend and her boyfriend is story for another day,they have been together for 5 solid years.Samsung galaxy tab was just for the sake of Vals gift.He has done more than that in the past

Did you just say confirmation?That means it should either be negative or positve right?It is negative.Hope we are good now?

passionate88: What if it was?.

*who wants to be a millionaire?*

kaboninc: Wow! You're a sweet girl....you know.
Don't worry, you just have to let your guard down a bit and let your experience drive your actions. I don't know if its this year but I know that when a man loves you, as you are, he'll do it with his soul.

*konk pidgin is a beautiful language. Try learning it*

Thank you so much,I appreciate

nbright: Saw this on vanguard.... Girls what's ur take on POLYGAMY?....
http://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/02/i-dont-supply-women-to-politicians-lola-alao/

Somebody is probably having a brain waiver.Personally,I don't subscribe to that,I want my man to myself.I would also apply the golden rule here.


If anywoman can condone that,then let her click the share button.

passionate88: So u no get any feelings for the guy u still keep am on "let me think about it" lane?. U know say ur answe go be NO but u still put the guy on hold!... Girls WICKED o... That's cruelty to the male folks...

While thinking about it,I might just start liking him.Some cases are like that.Besides,I felt I needed to work on my self ,I mean I needed to let MY GUARD DOWN.Its been up for so long due to the emotional problems I have been through.

I felt maybe the problem was coming from me,so I did not want to push him away like that.I am flawed in so many ways but wicked? C'mon ,what would I gain?

passionate88: Maybe the marriage na the condition given to him in other for him to progress... JUST SAYING O

OMG!,now you got me laughing so hard.Jeeez!,you re not serious.At least,we re still reasoning towards the cult thing abi?

passionate88: May No... But I still think mayb him like u but him wan wait untill him build house bt due to unforseen circumstances, the bobo just deciede to rush the proposal.

Hmmmm....well for this what can I say?If only I have the power to hear peoples mind.I mean,what if that was not his reason?

bukatyne: @Carmiedoll: I don't konw which post to quote, Lol! I was referring specifically to the guy talking about money and all. As a matter of fact, i respect you more because of this story. I like women who know what they want out of life and pursue earnestly. Many a woman would have swallowed the guy's proposal and come to NL to disturb our peace after two yeras.

Thanks buky,it takes courage & God,s grace to do that.The offer was so tempting especially when all you hear in churches at the beginning of the year is shouts of "THIS YEAR IS YOUR YEAR!!!!".AMEN!.

Of course I pray that this year would be my year,but God help me I don't want to be blinded by that phrase.

The year is still young,I hope for a happy ending.Once I see him I will know;he would know me too and there won't be need to rush things.

I hate rush,most times it does not end well.

BITER TRUTH:NOT EVERY LADY WOULD MARRY THIS YEAR(wish it was every lady)

passionate88: Na wa o... Me I know pure physics, pure chemistry which one come be pure english again?....

Lol,you have a good sense of humour you know.

passionate88: On that ur proposal story, babe u funny o... So u even think go occultic angle?... Na wa for u o.. That's stereotyping... So becos he hurriedly proposed to u, u suspected foul play?... Me think he truely LIKE u but either he no wan wait for long because he feel say another guy fit propose to u b4 he get to knw u wella or him dey fear say as him dey get to know u una go bcome frnds na their the thing go spoil, or him don dey age or him mama don pressurize am tire.... But u pray over the proposal b4 u turn am down?.

No I did not suspect foul play,no I did not.May be the whole african magic thing took a toll on me,I mean if he actually belonged to a cult,he would be rich na,abi?

But I just felt he was not connected to me at all.Even if his moma was pressurizing him in the village(though the mum is late),he should marry me because he loves me; not because he wants people to stop disturbing him .Now tell me,did I ask for too much?.

As for prayer,I would ONLY do that if I feel at least a little spark of feelings for the man.The fact that I have feelings for him would encourage me to seek approval from God.But you see,I did not just like the way he was going about it.

chikeorji123: Long time no see wow! it's have hit front page & now on page 30?..the purpose have been accomplished..
Note:before l forget so some ladies do really know what they want..? Carmelion..l just conclude an interesting topic with my colleague that ladies generally don't know what they want..

Good to see you again chike.where have you been?!London?to see the queen I guess.Yeah some ladies do not know what they(ofcourse all the dolls in this thread know what they want).Pray not to jam such people cos thay would end up destabilizing you.

Look out for people who re focused and sees life the way you do.

To my future husband

I want to first, say I am sorry
For not keeping myself for you.
Please don't blame so much
It was not my fault.

Even now,am yet to see you
So I thought all the guys
I have met was you
Forgive me Love It was not my fault

I do not know what is keeping you
But I know you will come
Ever since I realized this
I resolved to keep myself

Despite the lonely cold nights
I await you
Despite the peer pressure
I will know when you come

All I have prepared for you
I can't put it down in writing
When Carmydoll is through with you
You will be the one to write it

I await you while I do other things
I pray to meet you soonest
Our kids are waiting too
I love you my future husband

~Carmydoll~

kaboninc: Hmmmmm....that pidgin is not 'konk' na. But eh.....don't you speak it?

I do, sometimes, but not very well.

After fighting with my self for like one month,amidst his pressure,I finally made up my mind to tell him my decision.

I felt that telling him on the phone ,would be rude so I arranged for us to meet. I wanted him to see my facial expression and know that I have nothing against him.I also wanted to give him the opportunity, to air his mind.

Whatever it is that I don't find appealing from him to me , would be considered right by another woman.

Of course he was bitter and down,but I could not help it. I have my desires too.I just told him,I was not ready yet.

What am I trying to say?When a lady turns down a guy,people usually take it that,she did so because the guy is not rich. But some times,it is not all about the money,there re other things we ladies consider too.

Ladies should also mind the way they say NO. Do it politely but pass your message.

~Sorry for the long post~

Now let's not get things mixed up. This guy is very handsome,I wish I can post his picture here. Like I said,his business has not really picked up,but I see signs of remarkable success.I think he is still trying to understand a Nigerian market.

No house,no ride yet but I know that those things re not too much for him to afford. He just wants his business to grow first which is a very wise decision.

To crown it all,I also discovered that he belongs to a particular set of people I can NEVER get married to. Mind you he is my tribe,so it is not tribal thing.(It is a type of family).

I would not mention or describe those set of people because I know that some dolls and guys on Naira land are from there. My dad is also from there by the way, so I witnessed how my mum suffered in their hands. As God would have it,this guy is the only one from there that has proposed to me(I pray he is the last too).Getting married to such people gives already made enemies even before you enter the family.My mum does not hesitate to drag my ears about it each time we engage in "marriage talk".Infact that is the first thing she would ask you about the guy.

I was thinking of shutting my eyes to other flaws and start from the scratch with him,but I know I can't shut my eyes to "the family thing".In most cases,it runs in the family,so there is a tendency he would take after them. Some of his statements confirms that.

Then the rush thing too,hell no!,I hate pressure.Besides,I felt he just wanted to get married just for the tittle sake.He has never said he likes me, let alone "Love".That's too bad.I mean is love no longer the foundation of marriage?

I hate the fact that he was rushing me. At a point,he said "okay I will give you just one month to know ourselves,so that by Easter,I will come for introduction and wine carrying"

Hmmm,but wait o one monthOf course I told him that the minimum I would accept is 6months.He said ,noooo,6months is too much. That he wants me to be in the preggers club at least by December. Now can you imagine that?

At a point I started wondering if the guy belongs to a cult and perhaps they have given him deadline.Forgive me for that, but what else do you want me to think? I mean why the rush?(Please anyone who has the answer ,should tell me o).

Well I started analysing him bits by bits and I discovered that If I give into this guy's pressure and marry him,I would be so unhappy in my marriage because we would always see things differently.

He is a nice person in his own way but our views about life are no the same. He is still backwards,I mean there re some derogatory remarks he makes about women right in front of me,and I just know I would be done for ,if I say yes to him.

His kind of man would make me give up everything,keep me at home,to take care of 'His Kids'(yes that is the way they say it) . Of course my Kids would be properly taken care of but my life should not be placed"on hold" because of that. Depending on someone can kill me.I hate self pity.

I am really in a good mood today so here is the full story I wanted to share with bukatyne (after our discussion on ladies marrying guys who has close to nothing )and I know some dolls in the house would find it useful too(I guess).

2013 started with a marriage proposal for me. but I turned it down after considering a lot of things. First let me give a little hint about him.

We met through a random friend last year and started off as mere acquaintances,exchanged phone numbers. We spoke on the phone once in a while(e.g once in 2 months).
He has been outside the country for a long time but came back 3 years ago to start his own business. So far,it is still thriving but looks prospective.

All this while we were talking on the phone or meet when I go to see my friend,he NEVER mentioned anything about love,,only for him to just meet me one day,and all of a sudden announced his marriage intentions to me.

At first,I thought he was not serious so we laughed over it. When I got home,hmmm...that was when the main follow up began. He started calling me everyday to ask after my day and also to find out if I have considered his proposal.

I was still battling with myself to know if I can accept him or not. Guess what?He started announcing to his family and friends that we would be getting married soon.

He also,started arranging for us to visit his family(all within two weeks). I was not happy with that. I mean I hate pressure. How do I get married to somebody I barely know?

When I asked him to give me time so that,we can at least know ourselves,he would say"baby just ask me anything you want to know about me,I will answer you".I told him that it is not about questions and answers but we need to connect emotionally. Personally from me,there was no chemistry.

nbright: Let him be, that's his way of writting... I am following his e-fight with Idowuogbo and freecocoa..

No problem,as long as you will be helping me to translate it.It takes me an extra time to read and understand konk pidgin like his own.

passionate88: Girls na wa to una o.... So because I no too talk wetin una like una (carmelion) no fit acknowledge me when una dey hail ppl?.... I bow o... Anyways... Ride on.

Hello passionate,my sincere apologies for not acknowledging your presence.

I want you to know that I MUST not like what you say here, just the same way YOU MUST NOT like all I say. Corrective criticism are welcomed here,but please keep it clean and sound.

If not for dailynews correction,I would not have noticed that my writing skills here was very bad. Nbright,xyoung & Madlion are another set of corrective critics that visits this thread but believe me,I look forward to their posts.

This thread is not for me alone,so feel free to say your mind. I might not relate to what you post,but another doll in the house might relate to it. In such cases,I usually keep quiet and just learn.Unless,it is directed to me.

Please on a very light mood,I am begging,I would prefer it,if you write in pure English.
Thank you.

Are you really the one or you re writing on behalf of someone?

if you re the real person, what exactly do you want?The tone of your write up is so indifferent,neither here nor there.

Maya2pretty: flexin uuuuuu , I was at home all thru, watchin movies, spendin time on d net and oh, I took a 3hrs nap, lookin better dan ever

Whatever works for you doll,go with it.I like the sleep part

rubi96: @camalion hmmm nice i think i need me a new dress

Thanks RubiYeah,ladies never get tired of a new dress.

The day I will wear mine ,I will take a nice shot and upload the pix here.I can't wait

She inspires me http://thesinglewoman.net/

she is a white>

Good morning Dolls, hope you had fun yesterday?(sensibly of course).Mine was splendid,I attended one of my friends court wedding yesterday.

A wedding on a Valentines day,believe me ,it was a romantic sight to behold. I mean the whole love in the air,gooosh!,I was feeling her joor>3

I look forward to mine

It was Valentine ,dolls,so I made sure I showed myself some love!!!.I ended up buying one item from the list and another random thing(a beautiful dress!).It is turquoise blue in colour and I know how well it blends with my complexion. It is a sleeveless gown with a golden belt(So happy). I also got a set makeup brush and different colours of eye shadow.My customer gave me a pepper red nail polish as a Val's gift

These things might not mean much to someone else,but you know what?,it was all about me(x10000).This means so much to me. Yes I was selfish yesterday,duuuurh.

One of my friends showed me what her boyfriend bought for her(a samsung galaxy tab).I was so happy for her. My office also organised a small get together yesterday, so there was no dull moment for me yesterday.

I promised to upload the pictures of what I got for myself so here it is.

How did you spend yours?

kaboninc: Carmelion...is it the Carmelion I know?

100% sure it is not
At least not with this spelling.

DOWNLOAD MAGA NO NED PAY

http://www.waptrick.com/download/Cohbams-Banky-W-Rooftop-Mcs-M-I-AbagaOmawunmi/Maga-No-Need-Pay/?type=FT&id=199393&from=S

Get Inspired Dolls

Window shopping on my mind!!,Break,where @ thou?*dancing etighi*