₦airaland Forum

nuclearboy: Dude: I condemned and still condemn the pogroms and unlike most of the youngsters here, was around during the civil war though as a child! But a few things have always made this issue a 2-way blame game for me

1. How come all Biafra soldiers look well fed while d children starved? What manner of man eats leaving his child to starve?

2. Why did the war only start 10 months after the northern riots? Why only then and not spontaneously or even anytime before Gowon decided to split the country into 10 states? Why was that the "key" that started the war? Didn't Col Ojukwu know his people were being killed until Gowon decided to lessen his powers? And if any of the Igbos reading this was NOT Igbo, would he not wonder at the timing coincidence?

3. When food was offered and effectively rejected because your general insisted on being paid by such as the Red-Cross, which was more important to him? Cash to buy weapons to kill more people OR the lives of the youbg children his decisions sent to an early painful undeserved death?

4. Igbos are mostly Christians - what did Jesus say about counting costs before starting to build a house?

I feel very sad about the death of millions who were mostly innocents but this debate is asinine in trying to pin ALL the blame on your perceived enemies! Truth is your planning was shoddy, the motives suspect and selfish, the propaganda hurtful to your own people and the timing totally wrong!

What we should be doing now is trying to align so we can build a proper future not this rubbish!

You spoke the truth.
love your points. but these igbos here, with their self-righteous oral diarrhea, will forever remain in denial.

first of all, paternity test is needed
second of all, that poor child will soon become an orphan
third of all, the poor child is at risk of developmental problems (down syndrome, mental retardation etc) due to the low quality of the s[size=1pt].[/size]perm.

in short, old men should not be procreating. for the sake of the poor children. use a CONDOM.

Ranoscky: Would love to be a spare tyre as to piank her whenever she needs to be pianked. But investing my money on it? No way! Not even a cent. She should be the one to even pay me for my services.

this comment is so messed up.
woman paying man for sex. infact, you must be an houseboy.

afam4eva: I just have to say that there are different people doing the same stuff. Why can't we have a station dedicated to Food in Nigeria.

that would be cool. wouldn't it?

I've had enough of these silly 15yr old boys running around in front of the camera. we need mature, 'real' artists. where are they?
is that too much to ask for?

ekt_bear: I ain't got no TV ma'am...nairaland and the internet more generally plus netflix are sufficient for me

hahah me neither. I've been offered a TV for the second time this year and turned it down. it's a waste of brain cells. this topic too of course but...

Chyz*:
The only thing eastern nigeria declared was independence not war. by the way im not from the eastern region so shut ur mouth. And pls, lets not talk about crying a river because your Yoruba leaders have have been in dipers and sucking their thumbs for the past couple weeks now because of one man. Pathetic.

shatapp. independence by force. you lost it. lick your wound.

we will continue to whoop you and your dirty mouths all over nairaland. No pity party for you. create a biafraland website and go gather over there for that.
foolish non-entity.

ekt_bear: Well, Achebe and co seem to have a bigger issue with the SW than the North.

The North (both core north and middle belt) massacred them in large #s, but you will not hear as much criticism of them

na fear dey catch them.
Yorubas are really gentle people and so they feel it's ok for them to wipe spit on our faces and we will stay mute. lol
let them try it with the north. they know exactly what they will get

those trouble makers.
trouble dey sleep yanga go wake am. that is the life story of the igbo people. lolwhat ever rocks their boat sha. they seem to enjoy it.

stupid topic.
are you going to dig him out of his grave and send him to biafran prison?
crime ko, punishment ni.

the biggest criminal was Ojukwu. pity the nigerian govt didn't hang him for treason like he deserved.

Chyz*:
Yes, yorubas in Oyo state region.

get over it.
you shouldn't have declared a war in the first place if you weren't ready to accept your loss.
cry me a river. *whine* *whine*

Awake9ja: The problem with we the young Nigeria's is that wd are quick to point fingers and insult people .

Read my comments again and tell me where i said that Soyinka is a neutral person? I said a neutral reporter. What is wrong wit you guys?
Ask yourself why is it that only yorubas always defending the war?

Heed my advice you are doing yourself a harm on this, you don't know tomorrow.
Desist from it pretend as others and lie low you loud mouth .

I, as a yoruba, am defending Nigeria... not the war. I am defending the unity of Nigeria. big difference.
I am proud to be Nigerian and proud Biafra was defeated.

"lie low you loud mouth"
typical trash coming out of the uncouth mouth of a clown.

The hausas don't have to say anything. They have no stake in the western world and they could care less about Achebe going about the US with his propaganda and sensationalism. Maybe Achebe should try publishing the book in arabic to the middle eastern world, then maybe you might see an actual genocide. anybody want to try it?

~vicky~:
this is no wedding. it looks Photoshopped, ok Mr man to prove it give us a good link, not Facebook link o

control_seven: Clearly photoshop! But d woman luks lik a high prophetess of d cherubim & saraphim order. Dat guy must be 4 a sacrifice...Lol

you beat me to it.

PHOTOSHOP

Awake9ja: 3million is not 300, let my yoruba bros please learn to keep mute on this war like the north does, like England,France and Russia does.
You guys are speaking more than necessary.

I don say my own make i dey go.

This is Nairaland. How many northerners do you see on nairaland.
if there were many of them here on nairaland, they won't hesitate to speak their mind.

what has england, france or russia has to do with this?

re@lchange:
show me one yoruba in nairaland that condemns the pogroms
even your top posters here like katsumoto and the like justify it

Most Yorubas were and are part of Nigeria. we strongly condemn biafra!! no question about that.
I don't know what kind of answer you are expecting.
you declared a war and expect us to throw a party for you or what?
war is brutal and you declared it. so deal with it!
40 something later, you are still whining. what losers.

Awake9ja: http://www.newsexpressngr.com/news/detail.php?news=437&title=Soyinka-breaks-silence%2C-says-BIAFRA-%28Igbos%29-SUFFERED-GENOCIDE-during-civil-war


Even the independent reporter excellently captioned the report as "soyinka breaks silence , says BIAFRA (Igbos) SUFFERED GENOCIDE during civil war"

A neutral person even agree with achebe .

Why is the yorubas carrying this war discussion on their head instead of the north and beltans ?

You guys are making yourself unnecessarily enemy of the ibos.

You guys barely participate in the pogrom and the genocide called war but you are on the front to discuss it as if it's your personal war.
Are you not building a monster around you, even the beltans hardly argue with ibos in this subject.

shut up. how is soyinka neutral?
check your dictionary for a definition of genocide before throwing words around like you know their meaning.
Biafra was a WAR not a genocide.
in a war, you can surrender.
in a genocide, there is no surrender. a genocide is an ethnic cleansing. the jews didn't have any choice. neither did they start a war.
biafrans on the other hand started a war and refused to surrender when they had a choice. In the end they did, of course, after Ojukwu ran away to sierra leone.
if you choose not to surrender and fight to death. then that's a suicide not a genocide.
Why aren't we calling Iraq war a genocide? plenty are dying there.
check your dictionary fools.

Only in Nigeria will you fight a war and claim victim/genocide when you lose. duh people die in wars. that's why they're wars!! World War I alone had more than 40 million souls perish. why aren't they claiming genocide?
In fact, the losers were punished further and made to pay reparations!! You biafrans should be counting your blessings Ojukwu wasn't hanged for treason.

besides, from the pics, all the biafran soldiers (including Ojukwu himself) look very well feed during the war. They were stealing food from the people they were supposed to be protecting.

In most nations, when a group loses a secession war, the leaders of such group are punished by prison sentences or death. Ojukwu and his men were pardoned which is very kind gesture on the part of the Nigerian govt. Biafrans should be thankful for that.

You aren't going to be paid or flattered for losing a war. What did you expect, a celebration party?
You start a war and expect to be pampered with food? What exactly are you whining over? It was a WAR. get over it.

That's why in a war, there is an option to surrender.
In an ethnic cleansing, there is no option to surrender. big difference

According to the dictionary, Genocide is defined as:
A deliberate or systematic killing of a group of people esp. of those belonging to an ethnic group or nation. ethnic cleansing.

Basically,it means deciding that you want to wipe out an ethnic group and systematically doing so. There is no evidence whatsoever that the Federal Government of Nigeria, during the Biafran war, planned to kill off the entire Igbo population. There is absolutely no documentation of this. The whole goal was to defeat the Biafrans into surrender from try to secede from Nigeria. So no, Nigeria wasn't trying to wipe out igbos from the face of the earth. If there was an ethnic cleansing, the picture will be totally different.

If you want to call Biafra war a genocide, then by extension, there is also a genocide going on in Iraq, Syria, Afghanistan and anywhere else with a war or blockade going on. We all know this isn't true.
The Biafrans had the option to surrender. They were encouraged to surrender. But deciding to "fight to death" unfortunately makes it a suicide and not a genocide.
The biafrans died for trying to secede from Nigeria. Not from an ethnic cleansing like they like to claim. wtf.
war is always brutal and the Biafrans knew what they were getting into when they declared war.

SOYINKA and ACHEBE can go to hell!!
they're both fools in my opinion. this thread goes to show that winning international award doesn't make you intelligent or a genius.
I've lost my respect for those two.

It was a freaking war. what do you expect. There was clearly an option to surrender.
Why not go ahead and call WWI and WWII genocides. over 50 million souls were lost in both wars.

to me, the biafran deaths were suicides, not genocide! The biafrans chose to die rather than surrender. that's suicide.

News has just surfaced that the murder of US Ambassador to Libya and violence at the embassy has nothing to do with Anti-Islam youtube video. There was in fact, no demonstration at all at the embassy!! So what prompted the murder and why was it blamed on the video?

Damn propaganda and lies.


http://www.boston.com/news/nation/washington/2012/10/10/state-never-felt-libya-attack-due-film-protest/jZV8Y8DhYTEVm04p4TCiCM/story.html


President Barack Obama, asked on ABC about the changing accounts of what instigated the attack, said the information was evolving.

‘‘As information came in, information was put out, the information may not have always been right the first time,’’ he said. ‘‘These are people I know, and if there is something to be fixed, it will get fixed.’’

duh women wear make-up to look prettier. granted some apply too much or apply it wrong.
but when you apply it well, you look 10x better. it enhances your beauty.

there are many women who just love make-up and fashion and always overdo it just as a personal statement or fashion statement.

" We saw Ojukwu's departure. That wasn't a pretty sight either... " He arrived in his huge Mercedes. He had them load nearly three tons of luggage on board his plane and then...Good-bye, everybody."

-The Sidney Morning Herald - Jan 27, 1970



DAMN!!!!

and these were French doctors, mind you. They formed medicin sans frontiers (doctors without borders) during the war to help starving kwashiorkor ridden biafrans. Only to get there and realize their mistake. Ojukwu was a monster not a savior hahaha

demmy: Typical igbo hustler that will do anything for money. Isn't that what Achebe is currently doing?

LOL. the funniest thing is these igbo boys on this thread are in denial. in their mind, the film was doctored
hahaha truth is indeed very bitter.
even a quick google search will confirm that Ojukwu was demanding landing fees from the charities to buy weapons. most of the food was also being quartered for the army rather than for the starving igbo people. does ojukwu or his men look like they ever missed a meal?

in fact, the "starving children" were being exploited as a propaganda weapon by ojukwu. that is the saddest case of all. exploiting the poor kwanshiokor children in order to garner pity from abroad. he didn't care for those kids. he would have quit the war if he did. what a monster. the exploitation just caused the war to drag on longer than it should have.

jobaskia: what about other people in those countries that are licensed to use it? I agreed nigerians could have bad temperament but other nationals do have bad temperament too, so we are not in any way different. Once every one is licensed so nobody knows what you have at home . It creates fear on who wants to attack you and it become first shoot , first die and FIFO - First in , first out . It's good joor

gun violence is a big problem in those countries you are trying to emulate. especially among the poor, blacks and youth. it is the #1 cause of death. they get in to a fight and the first thing they do is bring out a gun. nothing worth emulating. it's very destructive to society. espeically where there is high poverty and low security. there will always be something to fight or kill for.
and the big factor is supply and demand. law and legality is just a secondary factor. if supply is high, people will get their hands on it whether it's illegal or illegal doesn't matter. sort of like marijuana and other illicit drugs.

Dede1: It will be nice if Nigerians should be allowed to bear arms legally.

the fact is there's a lack of supply that's keeping guns off the streets (thank God)in naija. not any laws.
so blame supply and demand. if there is a high supply of weapons, many many people will get their hands on it. whether legal or not.
this is naija we're talking about, not so? a country where lawlessness is the order of the day.



so the answer is a big NOOOO!! God forbid we all buy guns!! what kind of question is that sef?

Keep up the good work, I'm running off to Ivory coast.:- Ojukwu.

hehehehe

Awolowo did not deny the seizure of the food, he said the federal govt ordered the food to be stopped because the foods were not getting to the masses, the soldiers hijacked the foods to themselves....what else do you want him to say or do? And he did clarified this before he died but for somebody to now come up and accused him again after so many yrs..haba...wt all fairness and sincerity let us all judge it.

Let us stop ds fights, it won't lead anywhere. If Yorubas were bad we won't have millions of Igbos in Lagos and thousands in Ibadan.

The fat man took the food for himself, let his people starve and then ran off to ivory coast.
hahaha comical.

Toaskarity: pls tell me more

what i find

you sabi read.

Toaskarity: I thought NL have so many dif sections- politics,
Education, jokes etc
I think this belong to education section .

It belongs in politics. You just have to read between the lines.

This is a negative trait to have. yet particular groups suffer deeply from this Martyr complex. How do we deal with it?
"The Boy Who Cried Wolf' pretty much sums it up. how do we deal with this silly shouting boy? wait for the wolf to tear him apart?

They honestly believe they are a model of virtue. If they are abused and mistreated, they will suffer such indignities, because eventually their tormenter will see the error of their ways, and recognize what a special human being they are hurting.

Martyrs are often attracted to difficult and abusive people. They pick spouses who are brutal or intolerant, who lack a conscience, who deceive and manipulate them, and who resist the martyr’s efforts to reform them. It is interesting that they unconsciously choose to be around impossible people, and that their efforts to rehabilitate the latter are doomed to fail.

The victim role is an important component of a martyr complex. It justifies in their mind that others are responsible for their pain. They engage in compulsive blaming to reinforce this conviction. The blaming functions to deflect the basic neurotic tendency of their behavior: They set themselves up to be victims. They do this to avoid taking responsibility for their life, but also to show that their own behavior is beyond criticism.

The Martyr Complex

by Krishna on June 23, 2007

One of the most destructive behaviors in any relationship is the existence of someone with a martyr complex. As the definition from Wikipedia explains, a “person who has a ‘martyr complex’ desires the feeling of being a martyr for its own sake, seeking out suffering or persecution because it feeds a psychological need.” The characteristics of such persons include

They have the need to be a victim and complain always and relentlessly.
They take little initiative in trying to fixing any complaint.
If any problem is solved, but in a different way than what they proposed, the problem still exists, as far as they are concerned.
If any problem is solved according to their solution, they will find another problem to complain about.
If any problem is solved, it is because they complained about it.
They complain about problems that do not concern them in the least.
They do not appreciate any good things being done.
They lie and twist facts to prove their point.
They selectively forget, ignore or avoid any facts that may conflict with their point.
They resort to name-calling when everything else fails.


To generalize, here are the dysfunctional dynamics that happen when someone starts developing the martyr complex:

Other people take time to recognize this, but they do in time. They treat the person as “the Boy Who Cried Wolf”. The person loses all credibility. People start ignoring all their concerns, even if some are actually important, because they cannot make out what is truly legitimate.
Other people can behave just as irrational. Since a martyr usually boasts that he was responsible for any change, people avoid doing anything that can be used by the martyr for feeding his ego. Sometimes the very fact that the idea came from a martyr is cause enough to abandon the idea. A martyr creates many enemies directly and indirectly.
Since the martyr picks fights with anyone who disagrees with her, her friends have learnt to nod their heads at whatever she says, reinforcing her opinions. However, friends realize that too much close association with that person can be harmful. They behave like double agents by slandering the martyr in private and further lowering her image. Communicating any issue starts with, “Don’t think I am complaining like John Smith, but…”
A martyr can spoil the well for others by flaunting rules and opposing authority, not for any good reason, but just because of their perceived issues. When this happens, other people start putting up new rules or exhibit behaviors to prevent such incidents in the future. Flexible policies can become inflexible, negatively affecting everyone.
The martyr demands attention, but the opposite can happen with people leaving them alone and ignoring them. Take the example of some elderly people who crib all the time. They may actually be suffering from pain or disease. But, their relatives and caregivers cannot take their complaining any longer and abandon them.

Over time, the relationship can plumb the depths of hell. Resolve the situation as best as you can. In a future post, I will discuss strategies for handling martyrs, especially the need to differentiate between levels of martyrdom.

In psychology, a person who has a martyr complex, sometimes associated with the term victim complex, desires the feeling of being a martyr for his/her own sake, seeking out suffering or persecution because it feeds a psychological need.

In some cases, this results from the belief that the martyr has been singled out for persecution because of exceptional ability or integrity. Theologian Paul Johnson considers such beliefs a topic of concern for the mental health of clergy. Other martyr complexes involve willful suffering in the name of love or duty. This has been observed in women, especially in poor families, as well as in codependent or abusive relationships.[3][4] It has also been described as a facet of Jewish-American folklore.

The desire for martyrdom is sometimes considered a form of masochism. Allan Berger, however, described it as one of several patterns of "pain/suffering seeking behavior", including asceticism and penance.