₦airaland Forum

soulglo:
But she did not act out on it yet she is excusing it in these men. I'm sure if you listened to her sister in laws discuss her, you would think she had set out to kill their brother. If he had killed her, people would have said she was disrespectful. The same way he r own husband accused her of being disrespectful. I read her posts sometimes and I truly feel sad. I'm traumatized by what she went through yet cannot and absolutely will call her out for her dangerous stance on issues.

soulglo:
I honestly don't know if I should hug her or slap her. She's been through hell and I don't think she got the professional help she needed. It's all a coping mechanism for her. Most people would have snapped. She never one day thought to kill that demon who did those things to her and yet she makes excuses for men who have not even dealt with half of that. She has PTSD in my opinion

ileobatojo:
That is quite some astounding hypocrisy.

babyosisi:
He is human
Doctors do make mistakes too,they are not perfect
We make posts on nairaland and modify to make corrections
We use white outs / liquid paper to correct what we write
those mistakes could mean fatality when done by a doctor
He is only human

babyosisi:
Aisha2 and sophyrocks come and see American wonder
No wonder Igbos say when a funeral procession is going by ,to onlookers,they might as well be carrying a log of wood
All this from a woman who educates us on how some women deserved death at the hands of their husbands
Na wa o

Down memory lane







https://www.nairaland.com/mutter/posts/42

donpeey22:
And when the both of us work, but she earns more than I do thanks to her training as a Nurse which I bankrolled, she now has the right to get mad at me? Like I forced her into taking up the nursing job? And even when I still do my fair share of house chores?

I am asking all these because [b]I found out that when most married women work and make financial contributions in their homes, they tend to think they doing the man a favor or that they are slaving for the man like some would put it. [/b]Not really that they are fulfilled from doing that. This is not even a problem of the man not helping out in house chores, because even he helps out with chores, some ladies will still assume that he is doing that just so they could keep working their a5ses off, and not really that it's a normal thing to do. Such mentality is common among Nigerian- bred women, and they retain that mind set even when they go abroad.

This makes me want to conclude that A TYPICAL NIGERIAN-BRED WOMAN SEEMS TO LOSE RESPECT FOR HER MAN WHEN SHE BEGINS TO WORK AND MAKE FINANCIAL CONTRIBUTION IN HER SUPPOSED HOME. Because she was raised to believe that the man is to provide for her while her duty is to keep the home. So, when they see themselves working and contributing to the upkeep of the house, they consider it an anormally and begin to humiliate their men. When such humiliations linger for a long time, hatred builds up, the next thing is divorce where the man is made to lose almost all what he has laboured for in life.
This makes me wonder if it's better for Nigerian women to remain in the kitchen while the men go out to win the bread until they realize that it is not abnormal for them to work and contribute to the household, and that it is also not unmanly for their men to help in domestic chores. I know that some of you pretend that you don't want to be housewives, but it seems you inwardly crave to to be. So, damn the pretence and say what you really want.

babyosisi:
Tomato has since been re-classified as a fruit

soulglo:
It's rare to find a Nigerian woman especially those fresh from nigeria who want to sit and home. The man would have to be pretty rich for that to happen and when I say rich I don't mean lawyer rich or medical doctor rich either.

donpeey22:
Lorrie, would you like to be a full-time housewife? I asked this question because most of you ladies when asked would claim you don't want to housewives, only to turn around and make statements like yours above.
This kind of gets me confused as to what ladies really want.

PS: I won't have a problem with the idea of my woman being a housewife while I make all the money but she should be happy with that and not complain.

'Potatoes are botanically classified as a vegetable, but they are classified nutritionally as a starchy food,' says a DoH spokesperson. 'This is because when eaten as part of a meal, they are generally used in place of other starchy carbohydrates, such as bread, pasta or rice.

babyosisi:
Isn't it!
I dropped food and nutrition well before WAEC
Please remind me
Is it a fruit?
Cococandy come o,edwife ,chillisauce nwa mama and all these younger girls here,has potato been re-classified as fruit or animal kpa kpa and nobody told me

soulglo:
So how did a cop get his wealth? Wealthy cop. That's funny. Can we just tell these stories the way they happen. Wealth cop rotflmao. Tell us that the woman was cheating, that she was abusive and lied in court and got away with it. That I might even believe but when you start off by saying wealthy cop I just SMH at the desperate measures people go to just to believe that something is the way it's not

raumdeuter:
The court wont mandate it if the spouse doesnt push for it

Some spouse actually leave without taking anything so its not because the law says it, Its actually what the spouse wants.

In a divorce, the only thing I support is child support payment to take care of the children. Spousal support on another mans sweat is parasitism

raumdeuter:
If for any reason your man divorces after taking half your wealth and later told you that you need to pay him to maintain the lifestyle you introduced him to while he was still living with you.

I'm sure we wouldnt be saying the same thing

raumdeuter:
Even if its a man benefitting, I would never support leeching off another womans sweat. I would look at such a man with disgust.

Imagine the man at home, the woman working after a while he says he wants to divorce and take half the womans labour away because he stayed at home to look after his own kids ?

One day when someone brings such a story here, I wonder what people would say about it

raumdeuter:
If you want a lifestyle similar to what you are used to in marriage then stay in the marriage.

Its like saying I want the work environment I used to enjoy in Shell even when I resign my job there.

WHy should one spouse be sustaining the lifestyle of the other when they are no longer together

WHile one spouse was hustling to make money maybe the other should be dong the same too so they dont have to be sustaining one. The basic rule of life is you eat the fruit of your hands not that one person would give you a lifestyle you didnt work for

raumdeuter:
WHy are you backtracking now when the expenses are laid out?

Both sides took hits for the other while they were in the wedding. There would be times the husband has had to do inconvenient stuff just to make the marriage work.

WHy should anyone be paying the other anything? Should he list the number of times he mowed the lawns, changed car tyres, changed electrical fittings, did heavy lifting in the house. The way some women talk you think they are the only one doing stuffs in the house

Everytime couples fight you hear, I gave my body, I gave my career, I gave this I gave that, I did this for you I did that, Let everyone start listing and see who has done more

I would support a system where no one stays at home and the kids go to a paid baby sitter so there wont be claims of I could have been Alakija or Bill Gates if not for this marriage

Take what you brought in plus what you contributed while in the marriage. I think this is fair enough

CityNG:
This is a rehash of an old thread.

ApexTitan:
Thats impressive, I assumed you were using a DSLR camera the detailing and color capture makes for enticing food pictures. Will be on the lookout for more of your pictures.

babyosisi:
Ve gini?
That soup has potatoes nne
Is potato not a vegetable?
Must they all be green?
You want to see ugu or ewedu inside
Hahahahahahaha
If you don't know just like God created cococandy to be fair and me to be dark skinned,he also created green veggies and the white and orange ones

raumdeuter:
Would the woman refund the cost of housing she lived in for free for the period of marriage? rent is about $1,000 per month

Would the woman refund the cost of food she ate during this time? Feeding for one adult range from $300 to $600 per month

WOuld she refund the cost of the utilities she enjoyed like light cable electricity that was paid for during this time?

She gets $1,000 to $3000 per month, She refunds $1,200 for rent, $700 for feeding, $500 for other bills (Light cable water), $200 for fueling her car, $500 for other miscellaneous expenses

Whats the balance?

raumdeuter:
How about everyone takes what they brought into the marriage and what they contributed financially into the marriage

pickabeau1:
Next you will be vexing when we say marriage benefitts women

Don't worry marriage is dying gradually

We will see the avenue you guys will use to bleed people of money

soulglo:
Pansies. The system is fair. My man is a lawyer and he says this over and over again. The system is fair. I know women who pay child support. They try just as much as men to get away from paying. An african women called from Florida to get legal advice from my man about keeping the children so she does not pay child support. She's a nurse working ungodly hours. The husband chose to quit his job because he felt the children were paying the price of their moms selfishness. Fast forward to last year and they are done with the marriage. She does not want to pay spousal support or even child support. Well in most states she would have to pay. Nobody cares that she's a woman. She cannot escape it. I don't even think she cares if the kids are with her but in sure she'll want them with her if she can get away from paying child support. My ex friend who pays child support tried to use me to reduce her child support by claiming her daughter came to my daycare and she spent so and so. Heifer, I don't care if the court is asking you to pay 3000.00 a month. Sell your freaking Cadillac and drive a corolla then maybe you can pay the child support. The system is fair. Justifying killing in anyway over spousal rights or the rights of innocent children shows just how depraved these people are. Madonna should have killed Guy Ritchie when she had to pay him 80 million for a marriage that did not even last a decade or maybe Ludacris' baby mama should just go kill him now because he has primary custody of their child. I wish sperm was giving out based on people's character.

pickabeau1:
OK

I really want to get her point


This guy had a kid via surrogate
Is one of the richest sportsmen in d world
Had a long relationship with a model though over now

I don't need to know him personally to know he does not want one woman to shaft him Like they did tiger woods


Cool...
Are u saying Irina sharyk is as rich as cr7
So why did he not wife her

4 years relationship or more



So the law is fair in your opinion
Men losing all they worked for...



Stale Bobo juice..Lol

freecocoa:
Take the kids and go back to her father's house you say, now I think you are just being funny.

How is it possible that she told lies against him and the law just swallowed it, giving her all he has? Who is to say she didn't invest anything financially in the marriage? From the OP, it's clear these women work their black nyashes off everyday, so what are you talking about? Are you saying she should leave with nothing to take care of her kids with? So the only way to strike back if he feels he's been cheated is murder?

Coogar what have you eaten today?

pickabeau1:
i dont know why the women dont leave the man
They still want to drain him dead, take the house, the kids and even collect settlement

Guess this is what the females want everywhere

No wonder marriage is dying

Sophyrocks:
@ the bolded, its not just about home chores sef. These men themselves use their wives as milking factories. Why do you think these men only do menial jobs while their younger wives work like jackal for hours? These men will go hunting for younger women so they can be easily controlled as most older men believe and so that they can control the financial benefits coming from their wives. You can see their ages up there. All of them in their 50s. Why should a man go on newspapers advertising to marry only nurses? they barely know these ladies from adam they are bringing over o. I see those adverts on nwespapers na. And you know greedy ladies, once they hear "abroad", their ears will stand like antenna! Quickly they respond and off they go with these men. Now these men think the way things are in Nigeria, will remain so in U.S. Forgeting that all those antics they pull down here, you cnt try them abroad. You will see some will just sit at home doing nothing or decide to be taxi drivers. Most of them are not educated like that but would want to marry an educated woman. They are usually not aware of how demanding the nursing jobs are. but they expect the home chores not to suffer. Before you think of bringing a woman over just for the sake of using her as a milking cow, you should consider the nature of the job and be ready to fill in the holes the job would create in the home. These men are not ready to be supportive. so what do you expect?

If a man has noticed changes in his wife and she has become "Unbearable" as one of them in the Op puts it, why not divorce? Why kill? what have you gained in killing? Are these men trying to tell me other african men in the U.S also kill their wives too when provoked? Why is it only Nigeria men that are doing the killing? something is wrong with the way they reason.

mutter:
Aisha please, the woman was married to perform the duties of a wife. To submit and love her husband, take care of his home and family. They live in a system where you have to consider if the pay you get is worth employing a nanny or paying for child care.

It is the duty of the woman to cook and do the house work and she can thank God when she has a man who helps her.

Why leave your duty to do something else? First cope with your assigned duties before venturing into others.

The main issue here is that the man and kid`s are suffering neglect and the woman is sending the money home to her family or building her own empire in Nigeria.
Is that what the man married her for?