₦airaland Forum

But badman, your hands look kind of small. Does that mean your you know what is too?

badman888, you got some nice hands, if those are really yours. What currency is that in your pic?

To whoever said my profile message is scary. Why? You don't believe karma is a bitch? If you put good out there, you will get good back. And if you put bad things out there, you will get bad things back. That is how the world works. Some people do bad things and think they will get away with it, but it eventually gets back to them somehow. That's karma. All I am saying is that what you put out there is what you get back.

Seems people missed the part of my post where I said "Just kidding, " I was really making fun of the number of Nairaland members that were all posting that they were in love with another Nairaland member.

Thanks for clarifying Efani! Now I know.

Bluenubian,

I just came and found out about Tunde's love. Now I am off to frolick him.

Oh God! The reponses to this topic are too funny. LOL at the person who said my pic looks like one of the girls in teh Dove adverts. Second, that pic in my profile is something that I just customized from the h&M online site. But I look very much like that in real life, hairstyle, body type, skin color and all.

Why don't you go over and tell him how much you enjoy his trumpet playing and ask him how long ago he joined the church or something.

Eveseh, I'll take that.

So I see there is love between Snazzy and Typewriter. Laurynsluv and Laurynk. What about me? Yes, what about Curiousnja?
All interested parties, please take a number and form your lines to the left! 















































JUST KIDDING!!!!

I am sure you have all received this before. I received this a few years ago, but judging from some of the questions I see in Nairaland, here they are again. I am sure it will help a few people.


If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. so for those who say they want you but are not with you its just talk!!

If he doesn't want you, nothing you do or say can make him stay.

Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.

Stop trying to change yourselves for a relationship that's not meant to be. Slower is better.

Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. why would you want him as a friend anyway it don't make no sense

Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn't marry any of them when he got them pregnant, so Why would he treat you any differently?

Always have your own set of friends separate from his.

Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.

If something bothers you, speak up.

Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

You cannot change a man's behaviour. Change comes from within.

Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are, even if he has more education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

Never let a man define who you are.

Never borrow someone else's man.

If a man cheated on his girl with you then Oh Lord! If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs.

You should not be the one doing all the bending, compromise is a two-way street.

You need time to heal between relationships, there is nothing cute about baggage, deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship

You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you, a relationship
consists of two WHOLE individuals, look for someone complimentary, not
supplementary.

Dating is fun, even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.

Make him miss you sometimes, when a man always know where you are, and your always readily available to him- he takes it for granted.

Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need.

Share this with other ladies, You'll make someone SMILE, another RETHINK her choices, and another woman PREPARE.

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and an entire lifetime to forget them.

and on a final note,

if a man has ever strung you along and then dissed you big time then he isn't even worth your time, why should you still run around behind him like a lap dog or even talk to him when he has dissed you, remember, he will be having the last laugh at your expense!!

Don't have a man and then keep countless men friends, it makes you look like a LovePeddler!! and remember no-one will actually know he is just a friend, people will automatically assume you are sleeping with them if they see you at the movies, in a restaurant etc, if you have a man why do you need to go places with other men? it just doesn't figure!!!

THIS WAS WRITTEN BY A MAN, SO TAKE THE HINT LADIES,

Source: http://iasos.com/metaphys/3d-4d/

While on the topic, here are a few other dimensions to examine a relationship on.

SECRECY
Witholding information from my partner & from myself.
With secrecy, my partner never gets to know who I truly am. Keeps me separated from the greater portion of myself.  HONESTY + OPENNESS
Total honesty with my partner.  With honesty, my partner gets to know who I truly am. Honesty means being 100% who I truly am.
I do not withold a comment or information just to avoid hurting my partner, or to control the relationship.
I can never really know or predict what will hurt another or how they will react to my honesty.
Therefore, I should stop assuming responsibility for the other person's emotions, growth, & reactions to my honest non-manipulative communications.

CONDITIONAL LOVE  I will love you, only so long as you fulfill my needs and expectations. I will withdraw my love, if you do not satisfy me.
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE Even if you don't fulfill my needs and expectations, I will still love you. I love you for who you are without trying to change you.

EXPECTATION
I want, expect, and try to get my partner to fulfill my expectations and needs. I use my partner to satisfy my needs.
NO EXPECTATIONS I trust and have no expectations from my partner.  I enjoy my partner, but without expectations.

MANIPULATION
I use obvious or hidden manipulation so that my needs will be met, and so that I can remain protected from my own fears.    I only see my partner as who I need them to be, not who they really are. ALLOWINGNESS
I allow my partner to be who they need to be. Only then can I see who they truly are. 

THE NEED TO CONTROL
I do not trust that everything that occurs is for my highest good. Therefore, I need to control and shape the relationship, so that it will take the form I wish it to be. I feel like I "own" my partner. ABSOLUTE TRUST
I trust that everything that occurs is for my highest good. Therefore, I have no desire or need to control my partner.

RELATIONSHIP takes Precedence to PERSONAL GROWTH

PERSONAL GROWTH takes Precedence to RELATIONSHIP.

DEPENDENCY I depend on and need someone outside of myself in order to be happy.

SELF-SUFFICIENCY
I recognize that I, and only I, am the creator of my own reality. Therefore, only I, am the generator of my own Happiness.
LESS TIME with me is not good. My partner spending LESS TIME with me is fine. If I truly love myself unconditionally, then the time spent with myself is equal in value to the time spent with my partner. I love myself as much as I love my partner. Therefore, the time I spend alone is just as enjoyable as the time spent with my partner. Therefore, it's okay if I spend less time with my partner.

ENDING A RELATIONSHIP creates PAIN & LOSS.
ENDING A RELATIONSHIP does not create PAIN & LOSS.
In realizing that this relationship is no longer serving us, we choose to harmoniously end it. We recognize that the relationship is going in different directions, and so we allow it to end, without any hard feelings. Only with love.

FEELING CONNECTED to SIGNIFICANT OTHERS.
Even if my partner is far away, or even if I haven't seen my partner for a long time, I still feel very connected to them.

ANGER AT ANOTHER (Externalized anger) I am angry at my partner for not meeting my needs!
ANGER AT MYSELF (Internalized anger)  I am angry at myself for creating a reality that I do not prefer.

FEELING RESPONSIBLE for the NEEDS of my PARTNER
My partner is seeking to have their needs met externally by me, but a person's needs can never really be met by anyone else, so they are bound to eventually get angry at me, for not fulfilling their needs.

BEING RESPONSIBLE for what I would like to GIVE to My PARTNER & our RELATIONSHIP
I am pure in my intention in my relationship. I am 100% who I truly am with my partner. I am responsible for what, in my integrity, I would like to give to our relationship.

I prefer open relationships. What's the point of secret relationship? If there is some reason that you can't tell the rest of the world that you are dating, then you shouldn't be dating anyway. Simple enough.

Manakins, how old are you? Seriously.

Ok, how many versions of this topic do we have? Many people have answered it with some good tips. Check the archives.

If you met online and your relationship progresses into a real life relationship where you meet each other face to face on the regular, then that is possible. But just keeping it to online communication and then falling in love from that is very dangerous. People can say whatever they want on the Internet. How do you know he/she is not a psycho? How do you know she is not lying? The pic that she sent you, is that really her? How do you know that the hot 22 year old is not a 70 year old grandmother somewhere with a wild imagination bored out of her mind? How do you know that it is not a man?

You and this dude need to talk.
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-2181.0.html

Both of you should take a hint when the answer is plain as day.

Seun, you know you and I are often on the same page.

@ keele, could it be that you 2 are not compatible? You obviously have very different opinions, you are looking for 2 very different things from this "relationship" and you both react very differently to situations.  It seems like a lot about you irritates her. Do you derive any fun from being around her? Is it just the challenge of winning her over that you like? I really don't see the common ground in this relationship. Could it be the most obvious reason, that she doesn't want you and she is just hedging her bets and options till someone better comes along? Not liking it when someone you are in a relationship with touches you (no matter how strange it may seem) is one thing. But getting mad at someone because they touched you is something else. The only people that I get mad at when they touch me are people I don't like. i.e. People I can't stand.

Sorry to be so blunt dude, but move on already. Maybe she will eventually come around. And by that I don't mean that you should stick around her to find out if that time will ever come. I mean move on and do other things. Give her time to decide how much she values your '"relationship." If she never comes around, she never cared that much anyway and that seems to be the case here.

Saw the pics. Pretty graphic. Whoever wants to see pics,
http://editorial.gettyimages.com/source/search/FrameSet.aspx?s=EventImagesSearchState%7c0%7c1%7c0%7c28%7c0%7c0%7c0%7c1%7c0%7c0%7c0%7c57589326%7c0%7c0%7c0%7c0%7c0%7c%7c%7c0%7c0%7c0%7c0%7c0&p=7&tag=1

View at your own risk. It is VERY BAD.

Great question, hot-cocoa. Cause I am confused myself.

It's a personal decision as to how much storm you choose to deal with. But sometimes it is hard to tell whether it will work out. You go with the flow and see what happens. You put yourself out there and sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't. But yeah, I feel you. It is a very hard decision sometimes deciding when to stick to it and try to make things work and when you should finally just walk away.

I don't like bastards. I like nice guys. There is nothing like a perfect guy or Mr. 100% nice, but some idiots are non-starters. I have been fortunate enough to not have met any idiots/ assh*les, maybe except one. Soon as I realize that the person is a bastard, I kick him out of my life, real quick. I have them know that they need to take their pettiness, selfishness and immtaturity elsewhere, because it is no good here.

Maybe it really is time to move on. You can't stay wasting your time. Life is too short. if she comes around later on, then great. If not, then you wouldn't have lost much because you are living your life anyway. And I betcha while you are on pursuing more exciting possibilities, you'll start to realize that she is not all that after all.

The point is NOT whether he would really do it or not. You dont need to be around people who can even think of using such language. That suggests they are violent people to begin with. I'm sorry, the average decent person wouldn't use such language. Just my opinion.

^^^ Cosign.

Yeah, that is possible. I have not experienced that myself. Sure, guys who do that are losers, I guess. But even if some guys do that doesn't make most guys losers as your topic suggests. Sorry, I don't see the link.