₦airaland Forum

calabaman:
Hey all,

In the past few weeks, I have been somewhat down.

No appetite onto food.... No willingness to talk... Extreme loneliness (depression I think)

But I have always had someone to talk to here.

May God bless us all.

Just saying a big thank you to those who called / chatted me.

May God remember us all.

Amen.

If you're in Lagos and on the Island... If you need someone to talk to - Reachout!

GothamCities:
Some are in heaven, some in hell.

Here's why:

You're referring to the biblical account of Jesus' descent into the underworld after His crucifixion.

Here are the relevant scriptures:

The scriptures say:

1. 1 Peter 3:18-20:

"For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring you to God. He was put to death in the body but made alive in the Spirit. After being made alive, he went and made proclamation to the imprisoned spirits—"

Christ preached to the imprisoned spirits in hell when He died for 3 days. Those who received His message resurrected and went to heaven. The Scriptures say that when Christ died, many dead saints resurrected and were seen on the streets of Jerusalem.

This position is corroborated by the following scriptures:

1 Peter 4:6 (NIV):

"For this is the reason the gospel was preached even to those who are now dead, so that they might be judged according to human standards in regard to the body, but live according to God in regard to the spirit."

This is one of the great significance of Jesus' death on the cross. If He didn't die, the dead would be left out of God's plan for salvation.

Ephesians 4:8-10 also says:

"This is why it says: 'When he ascended on high, he took many captives and gave gifts to his people.' (What does 'he ascended' mean except that he also descended to the lower, earthly regions? He who descended is the very one who ascended higher than all the heavens, in order to fill the whole universe.)"

These scriptures suggest that Jesus preached to the spirits in prison, who were disobedient during the time of Noah (1 Peter 3:20), and that He proclaimed the gospel to those who were dead.

Exactly!!!

Ayomide11111:
And adage says we are the writer of our lives but I don't want to say I miswrote mine in 2018.


I have always been on frying pan with my family and all my efforts to create love between my mom and dad were in vain.


I have always been craving for an happy and joyful family in my life. Seeing my mom and dad laughing and kidding with us and maybe my wish is in my dream.


When I finished my OND program in Nov 2016 I decided to stayed in school with my few course mates because I knew if I come home I will never found joy.


These few of my course mates are indigenes of Ijebu Igbo. And they love roaming about pointlessly and I dislike this useless doings.


We will move from football field to gambling shop to Atéénu party and to where they never invited us. I dislike all these things but since I have no one to cling to or place to stay I have no choice to play along with them. They were even surprised founding me in their midst because I have my midst during program but my midst have gone to meet their own families.


In Jan 2017, I stopped roaming about with them and I applied for casual job in a local bakery in the same Ijebu Igbo. I will resume bakery before 6am and closed at 8pm and I will be paid 300 Naira everyday like that.


I could not able to use the money to do more tangible things but I succeeded using it to finance my project and the printing.


Till 2018 when I joined one private security company. During this time my colleagues at school are already planning for their HNDs while I'm thriving to survive on the street.


I have already been warned at home not to bring anything schoolsl stuff's to their ears. So I carried my cross.


I joined this private security company in Benin City. I traveled down from Ijebu Igbo to Benin City. And since then it was from one abuse to the other; from one insults to another to the extent that one day I looked at myself and I cried. I even doubted my sanity.

There was a time I was attending to a customer and I was speaking in English fluently, the customer looked at me from my toe to my head and hissed before getting away.


Security guards are seeing as unfortunate beings, human dogs, packaged slaves, poverty carrier and so on. I hate this experience


I never planned my life like this. Why? Why? I don't want to commit before making it God. God help me


Some customers will make your day but 85 percent of the customers you are to attend to in a day are coming to molest and embarrassed you whether you render the service to them politely or not.


I could not be able to save up the money to pay for my school results levies due to accomodations and feeding problems over 20,000 Naira they were paying me per month till 2022


In March 2021, I enrolled for a professional photography class at 100, 000 Naira for 1year training. And I catched up quickly in learning. Photography is very expensive but I believe God that I will move mountains through it. I needed another Master class to enroll for but money no dey now.


In June 2022 when I saved up to 120, 000 I traveled to school in Ijebu Igbo and when I got to school I was told by the school admin that levies has been multiplied by 3 for late payment. I almost wept out my blood that day.

I paid the affordable levies I could pay and I have their receipt and I traveled back to Benin City.

Last year was tough that I could not even walk with the kind of illness I went through. Thank God for the savings I have that I was saving up for my school levies it was what I used to give myself a good treatment.


And this 2024 again, '24 is going and I have not make it to bring my family back to the way I want it. Even at my age now I have not make up to get a family. I want to be a responsible man to my wife and children.


I don't want my children to smell POV not to talk of VERTY. Working as security guard since 27yrs old to 33yrs old and still receiving insults and embarrassment from mere customers. Just because of a penny, another person's girlfriend pedicure and manicure...


God when. Pls help me from above. I want a standard Life for my families God help

What did you study in school?

Drop your contact

[quote author=Rubyjade post=133094872][/quote]It all depends on you and which job you presently have at the moment.

paxx:
We got married in October. 2 days after the marriage my father came into my house and yelled at her that im already a married man. My father wants me to marry someone else. I did not defend her. She cried 3 times in 10 minutes.

She then told me she wants to take a 2 year break until we do a wedding. We did not do a wedding we just went to the goverment office.

What should I do? She told me that shes no longer ready to be married and even before my dad yelled at her she had reservations.

It has been 1month and she doesnt want me to call her wife anymore. She prefers financE. she is telling her friends that she is engaged.

What should I do?

First things first; what do you mean by "we just went to the goverment office."?

How can I unread what I have read?

The type of judgements we need in Nigeria.

Hehehe... That love will first fly out of the window

100naira:
Make Una confirm say Una get light because the way this light take off na so e de do when grid collapse.

Da grid is standing gidigba... May your transformer don blow!!! Lol

nokia1000:
Many oil and gas production company in Nigeria pay less than 70k per month in the name of contract workers.
Companies should stop this third party issue and employ people directly to stop this slavery.
We can't be slaves in our own land.
65k monthly salary goes no where.

Which O&G production company pays such??

Provide names of such companies and we will take it up to PENGASSAN to deal with the matter.

Rubyjade:
It seems like you're in a difficult situation with your boss. Here's a breakdown of what might have led to this situation:

*Possible Misunderstandings

1. Misinterpretation of your intentions: Your boss might have misinterpreted your advice to the new employee as an attempt to undermine their authority or create problems.
2. Lack of trust: Your boss's reaction suggests that they might not trust you or your judgment, which could be due to past experiences or communication breakdowns.
3. Different management styles: Your boss's frugal approach to business might be clashing with your more practical or pragmatic approach.

What You Might Have Done Differently

1. Communicate more openly: You could have informed your boss about the discussion with the new employee and explained your reasoning.
2. Avoid being perceived as confrontational: Phrases like "don't even think of touching it" might have come across as confrontational or dismissive.
3. Offer alternative solutions: Instead of suggesting that the organization find someone to fix the machine, you could have offered to help find a cost-effective solution.

How to Address the Situation

1. Stay calm and professional: Respond to your boss's message calmly and professionally, avoiding defensiveness.
2. Explain your intentions: Clarify your reasoning behind advising the new employee and express your commitment to finding solutions that benefit the organization.
3. Seek a meeting or discussion: Request a meeting or discussion with your boss to clear the air, address concerns, and work towards a resolution.

Example Response:

"Dear [Boss's Name],

I'm surprised by your message and would like to clarify my intentions. My advice to the new employee was meant to ensure that we handle the situation carefully and avoid any potential risks. I understand that my approach might have been misinterpreted, and I apologize if my words came across as confrontational.

I'm committed to finding solutions that benefit the organization, and I'd like to discuss this further with you. Could we schedule a meeting to talk about the issue and work towards a resolution?

Best regards,
[Your Name]"

Hehehe AI solution to the rescue... Nice one

Biggest scam of the year

nzube89:
How do I locate St Nicholas hospital Campbell Street. I am currently at GUO terminal Ajah

Take uber or bolt

Afodot0022:
Top of the day to you all and compliment of the season.We will all witness the new year coming. pls house, I need advice and opinion especially from single fathers either divorced, widowed. I have been separated from my wife for 2 years now and my two daughters age 8 and 7yrs had been with my ex wife ever since. It has gotten to the stage that she is now using the kids to get back at me by denying me access to them and also manipulate me, the greatest mistake I made was letting her took my kids away cos at that time I was emotionally down due to what lead to us separating and couldn't make a sound judgement at the moment.

Now my decision now is that I want to take custody of my daughters, for now I have my mom with me and also myself to take care of them while they are with me, all I just need is what are the prons and cons of being a single father and taking care of your kids as the man alone. what challenging's will I face in doing this so I can prepare my mind mentally and psychologically for the challenge ahead. Though I prefer the kids being with their mom and I take responsibility but the fact that she is using them to get back at me is annoying and frustrating reason why I want to make this move now so am going to be free from her manipulation.

Pls experienced single fathers raising their kids alone, which is better, letting the kids be with her while she use them as bait to get back at me or I should take their custody and raise them myself. I want them to finish up this school term and make the move. Your input and advice will be valuable and appreciated and pls if you don't have anything valuable to say or to criticize as some does here, kindly ignore and move. Pls mod, kindly move to FP for wider view and inputs

I understand how you feel... But fit now, please let them remain with their mum.
Behave like a mumu for now lest she turns your kids against you. So you need is to have access to them freely for now.

Your time to take them in with you will surely come... But for now, it's best they're with their mum.

cathodekazim:
My story isn’t one of triumph but of lessons learned in the hardest way possible. I left Nigeria with big dreams but returned with nothing but heartbreak and regret. This is my journey.

The Call to Adventure

It started in Ikorodu, Lagos, where I worked as a phone repair technician, barely earning enough to feed my family. One day, a relative who lived abroad called me with an opportunity I thought was heaven-sent. He claimed Morocco was a land of opportunities where I could earn in dollars working in construction or as a welder. “You can make ₦500,000 monthly,” he said.

The cost of the journey was steep—nearly ₦2 million—but he promised to connect me with agents who would handle everything. I thought about my wife and two kids and decided it was worth it. The goal was to leave Ikorodu with hope and return with success.

Thanks for sharing your story... Glad you cost to retrace your steps.

I pray God blesses you and make fortune shine on you.

NB: Create a YouTube channel... Drop your experience in episodes. It might just be a lucky break for you if it goes viral.

#Cheers

Lala does not fancy snakes anymore...

I see no problem in that.

meedoLock:
Happy weekend nairalanders
So, I've come with loads of questions for young married men in the house

To this effect, I need upright and experienced answers devoid of negative sentiments

So, as a young family with less than a month old baby, of course there will be need for us to wait for at least, 3 years before developing a thought of making another baby.....


It is however normal and medically necessary for a nursing mother to abstain from sex during the entire period of breast feeding and nursing the young baby.

At the other end, a father/husband who has nothing to nurse but ensure basic provisions of needs and care for both the mother and her baby may have a need to crave for sex during the period.

Now, without fornicating,for how long can a man wait for the wife to be physically fit to engage in marital sex and how can this be achieved without cheating.

Some friends says they wait for 3 months before engaging their wife in a protective marital sex again. But when I mentioned 2 years to them, they all bursted into an uncontrollable laugh 😂. They stressed that even women would not hold it for that long.

So friends in nairaland, come to my aid..

And once again, my questions are directed to married and young couples in the house...

All opinions will be keenly processed and thought over ...

Thanks 🙏🙏

3 to 4 months wait is fine....

Wahala is everywhere he goes like MTN...

amazinghands:
I relocated to the United States about eight years ago. My relationship with my dad has been strained and continues to deteriorate.

Background:
I grew up in a lower-middle-class family with both my mom and dad working hard. Everything changed when my dad started earning significant money. His newfound wealth led to a lifestyle filled with parties, women, and alcohol (to be fair, he earned his money, so he had the right to spend it as he pleased). He built a hotel and was barely home afterward.

2010:
While I was in college, I wanted to leave Nigeria due to the incessant ASUU strikes. I told my dad I wanted to study abroad. Initially, he agreed and gave me the funds to start the process. I was admitted to a school in Ukraine and secured a visa, but he later said he couldn’t afford to send me abroad. This decision felt contradictory, as his lifestyle said otherwise. (To be fair, it’s his money, and he has the right to decide how to spend it.)

2016:
I got admitted to a master’s program in the U.S. and approached my dad for help again. He told me to "cut my coat according to my size" and said he couldn’t sell any of his properties for the sake of a child studying abroad. (Again, to be fair, he was right—he had already paid for my college tuition in Nigeria.) Around the same time, he married another wife.

On the other hand, my mom sold her only piece of land and some jewelry to give me half of my first semester's tuition. After involving family members, my dad reluctantly gave me ₦400,000, stating that was all he could afford. I thanked him for the support.

Fast Forward to Today:
I struggled and worked odd jobs to make ends meet, determined never to ask him for help again. Over time, I’ve become financially stable, secured a good job, and am now a permanent resident. I give my dad a monthly allowance and occasionally send more during festive seasons. My mom, on the other hand, gets spoiled with gifts, extra money, and I’ve even invited her to visit and spend time with me in the U.S.

Now, my dad is broke and has suggested I buy him a car and increase what I do for him, despite the fact that my parents are separated and he currently lives with his second wife. I’ve told myself I won’t go above and beyond for him, especially since he chose to prioritize his lifestyle and the new wife (who came with a stepson). I find it hard to reconcile his past decisions with his current expectations.

Am I in the wrong here?

Hmmm... I understand how you feel brother. Many if us had such relationship with our fathers.

But pls, God has blessed you already and will continue to do that... Forgive the past and give him what he wants if you have the means.

I am happy your mum is alive to enjoy the fruit of her labour on you... That's all that matters!

diiadem:
I have a land that I want to build and I want to build a two storey building but I don’t have the funds. Where can I get loan or a developer to erect the buildings and proceeds from the rent will be shared between both parties at an agreed rate

Where's the land located?

Not a nice brand name... Even though I got the concept behind 'a monkey handling your investment is smarter than your bank...'.

Do well to rebrand...

Well, they both enjoyed their 'big day'.... They should endure the loan repayment period as well.

Confidant010:
Good morning,

Pls I am currently working in an organization in Lagos Island that pays 200k and about to be increased to 250k, and there's also a plan to be posted to one of the branches on the mainland with an accommodation not far from the company.

But I currently have another offer from another company on the island through the recommendation of my former manager(though it's a startup, but still in the same line of business) that offers 300k monthly without accommodation and the resumption date is 1/12/2024. Please which of the offers is best in your honest assessment because I am confused because of the high cost of living here in the Island.

Your advice will be really appreciated.

Thank you.

The extra 50k is not worth it... Stay where you are!!!

Be careful of what you believe... So that your belief does not become your reality.

#EGetWhy

Antwan99:
Someone said I need to de-worm myself. It sounded strange to my hearing. But to my senses, I perceived as the right thing to do. What can I take to de-worm myself?

Well, go to the pharmacy; tell the pharmacist that you need meds to de-worm your digestive system. That's all!!!

Vinnie2000:
An Clothing Organization that sells Baggy Jeans, (One for N20000), Increased price to N35000, due to the Harsh Economic situation of the Tinibu Govt.

Most Clients complained but later Adjusted when the company explained things with them.

Now a Dubious Client still wanted to buy 1 Jean @the N20000 Old Price and gave the amount to a Staff
(Who is her Family friend) to pay and Hoodwink the secretary to write Receipt for her.

The Staff agreed in this Plan and Tried to carry it out but FAILED.

So Question is, What is the appropriate Punishment for the Staff?
*SACK?
*SUSPENSION?
*Or QUERY?

Immediate sacking after query...

Rodimi20000000:
Hisense smart tv for sale… 43 inches

Still brand new I bought it around August I have receipt and all…
I need to raise money urgently that why am selling

200k
Location: Lagos
Slightly negotiable
08135664163

Are you on the island?

sirblend:
Has the national grid collapsed again?

Nope!

oziegbep:
Please nairalanders, i need urgent advice on this topic. I have been dating this girl for over 4 months now and recently i noticed she keeps asking me if i believe in the spiritual realm and she keeps saying she wants me to accompany her to badagry beach for prayers and cleansing. I refused vehemently and she keeps on insisting that i must go with her. After several effort to stop her she keeps forcing me to go with her, until recently i told her that the relationship should end that i am no longer interested. Please i want you guys to kindly educate me on what it means going to the beach for spiritual cleansing and prayers.
Thank you

She has good intentions but don't try it!!!

fastseo:
Recently, I saw a video on Facebook where someone deliberately connected their toilet to a chamber that leads to a hole that is not cemented. Their plan was to allow the waste from the toilet, including feces, to flow into the hole so that it would slowly drain into the soil.

I opposed this practice, arguing that it is not right to allow toilet waste to seep directly into the ground because it could contaminate the groundwater. Contaminants like viruses, bacteria, and other germs from the waste can seep into the water table and pose a serious health risk to people who rely on groundwater for drinking and other purposes.

Additionally, I have a neighbor who did the same thing, and I know that many people in Nigeria construct septic tanks with open bottoms, allowing toilet waste to drain directly into the ground.

My question is: Can’t this practice contaminate the groundwater with harmful viruses, germs, and other pollutants from human waste?

Yes and no.... Let me explain; firstly the practice of allowing faeces fluid to sink underground is wrong and should not be encourage.

This gets to contaminate the surrounding water found in shallow depths but not deep underground water table. The earth layers/strata underground serves as filterate for contaminated water going underground.

Hence, the deeper you go, the cleaner and purer the underground water is.

This is why it is adviced to dig your wells and boreholes deep into the deeper underground water table rather than the shallow ones.