₦airaland Forum

harmeenart: In Islam we know the sunnah after the nikkah is to spend seven days with your wife if she is a virgin and three days if she isnt.Can he achieve this if he marries two wives on the same day?

I like this.

How some women allow things like this is beyond me.

tbaba1234: And yea, don't call your husband a baby unless he is like me. ... It might not be pretty.

and what is it about you?

onegig: i didn't mean courtship. I mean you have seen her mahram and there's an interest and negotiation going on. Would you cut that off because a lady asked you out and you want to save her from the embarrasment of turning her down? There's noting like something willed and not willed . This is a question of she asking you and you having your interest somewhere else . That she asked doesn't make it ordained or holy.

and marrying just to save face sounds like the worst reason ever to.

I like the infusion of the Nigerian culture.

Congratulations!!!

mine is sooon!!!!

can't wait!!

roxell120: waste of valuable money.millions ve been there and nigeria is worse than before they left.its high time they stopped mistaking tourism for holy trip.
misplaced priority .u need to see their luggage while coming back.

what is this one saying?


Did any of the pilgrims ask you for money?

I wish the pilgrims a rewarding hajj experience

Men are babies..hilarious.

what is a baby doing married?

This other one relates a toddler with the big baby. Sounds like how Sissie said it above.


http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/1103903


and a nairaland thread with people like me hilarious no be small.
https://www.nairaland.com/1437069/married-women-shld-stop-allowing/5#18099716

I read some articles online on how men are babies. some are pretty interesting. But then,when a man cannot be trusted to take care of his own children like in the following article, there is a big problem.


http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-453857/So-men-just-great-big-babies.html

Sissie: Yes.
no its not. A man should also treat his wife like his baby, provide for her, be her "bodyguard" and protect her.

Now, this goes against the saying, Men are babies. It sounds like, men and women are babies.

Babies marrying babies. Child abuse

Sissie: Protecting him is different from monitoring him, protect him by not bringing it into your house, let him deal with the ones he sees outside himself. Can a woman stop her man from looking at other women, it means you have to blindfold him, which I doubt can happen.
A man should take responsibility for his action, but you are to help him make it easy to lower his gaze, I.e a woman lets her self go, stops taking care of herself and blames the husband for having eyes that wander, what did she expect?

Everybody has an ego, and once in a while we let it take over. Now the question here isn't telling your husband he needs to improve the question is how do you tell him.

You did not get my point o.

The woman should not bring it home, naturally. that is like a normal thing and not because somebody is a baby. He should know not to do stuffs because he is an adult and not be comfortable behind, ' I am a baby'.

He should take corrections from his wife and she will present them nicely. That is also a normal thing.

Everyone wants things this good. It is not peculiar to a man. Women should train their boys to be men who won't be burdens to their wives.

I am a baby to myself and taking care of me is a tough task. I would want a mate in a man and not a baby. I would expect that my life gets at least this easy or better in a marriage and not worse. My preference would definitely not be the 'baby' type of man.I would rather be the baby

Sissie: In addition to what tbaba has said.
A man is like a baby, if you have a baby you know when to punish and when to reward, you beat with one hand and give him sweet with the other, all the baby wants is sweets, he doesn't want to be punished, In respect to his ego, you know when to stroke this ego and when to tell him in a sweet way that the ego needs checking. If you do this wrongly the result won't be favorable. If you punish a child wrongly or give him sweet when he doesn't deserve it, you get the wrong results. This can be applied to other areas not just ego.

Like a baby you have to protect your husband from the second example tbaba gave, you can't say your baby ought not to touch the hot plate and drop it In the middle of the room, he will touch it oh. You can't do certain things and assume he ought to know better, you have to remind him.

Men are babies you have to pamper them, they seek for attention and you have to shower them with attention, they seek for it in a matured way hence the term BIG BABY.

You are saying he should get the baby treatment not necessarily because he acts like one. The wife just treats him like one sha. But is this only peculiar to men? can this go in favour of women as well.

onegig: It's not. The context should be seen from a marriage point of view so you can understand better. The examples i used up there are just analogies to help explain that point of view. Let me deviate a bit.


Being termed babyish is just the women folk being sympathetic to a guy's cause...like you know he misses his mum and she needs to start playing that motherly role so as to fill the void created.

Also being Babyish in marriages is a reference to a fact that he needs his wife's help or is over dependent on his wife in carrying out some simple tasks which in events that this help is lacking he can't function appropriately..

onegig: It's not. The context should be seen from a marriage point of view so you can understand better. The examples i used up there are just analogies to help explain that point of view. Let me deviate a bit.


Being termed babyish is just the women folk being sympathetic to a guy's cause...like you know he misses his mum and she needs to start playing that motherly role so as to fill the void created.

Also being Babyish in marriages is a reference to a fact that he needs his wife's help or is over dependent on his wife in carrying out some simple tasks which in events that this help is lacking he can't function appropriately..

I can relate with your explanation better.

But I think even in these scenario, the life he lived is a determining factor. Not all men need things to be done for them. In Nigeria though, they are brought up to see women as those who must see to their own needs.

that sounds contradictory.

society sees men as not babies but for a few baby-like acts that they may be found doing, become generalised as babies?

onegig: I don't agree with these .. It doesn't make any man a baby.. Those you listed are character and self issues. Areas i will consider most men as grown babies are areas like personal care. Ability to remember little things like where his car keys are kept and other trivial issues. I would give you an example... As for me, i cant discern when its right to go have an hair cut..i have to solely depend on my immediate people to tell me when my hair is going haywire and needs cutting..

This sounds more like it. But do men have the monopoly of being 'babies'?

Like you, I am almost always looking for things. Thank God for my very good four eyes . Would I be excused as a 'baby'? or do I get the tag only if I am also a man?

I have a bro who gets his hair cut constantly every 2weeks. He is also neat. better than me sef. That makes him less of a man? Is this generalisation good? Is it a man thing or an individual flaw that should be worked on?

Ps. I am not judging individuality hence my mention of my own flaw as well.

@tbaba,

Putting it the right way makes sense and saying it at the right time and the right way too.

It just doesnt seem babyish and my idea of men being babies was not even this. I am finding it hard to put them together sef.

Yes. A woman will do certain things. In fact there are women who wake their husbands up for tahajjud. These should be normal things between spouses and not because one is a baby. Someone should not get the leverage for bad behaviour because they are being termed, 'babies'. A man can get carried away looking at other women but he shouldnt be excused cos he is a baby nor should his wife be 'mothering' him on that.


The ego part too. abegi..I have said all I needed to say.

247notire: Skyscrapers = Endtime? Convince me pls!

it is a minor signal to the coming of the hour.

So many atrocities are linked with the coming of the hour. It is high time we got prepared.

May Allah help us.

igbsam: Tower of babel in the making. They want to provoke the wrath on themselves

can you explain that?

As you realise it is an End time thing don't forget the inherent message.


It is ok to want the good things of life. It is however not good to want it just for the sake of it or for competition especially while so many people are living in poverty.

too bad.

stillwater: Agbaya raised to the thousandth power trying to be relevant where it doesn't concern her. You did not see where she wrote gtfo, you did not see where I left her alone when she cried to be left alone, did i return to the thread to continue the tiff even if she made a very tribalistic comment? Silly woman. Better respect your own grey hairs and stop trying to start something. If this is how they seek relevance in your village, doesn't mean it applies to mine. Ode!

You dislike bullies but you are attacking someone else. Rotflmao how senseless can one get.

Two bullies in one thread, I would like to see how that pans out.

You can take the girl from the gutters but not the gutter from the girl.

Done talking with you.

Of course, spewing trash like you do makes you more fulfilled and I am not going to indulge you.

banky222: Most Nigerians pay for their drinking water, pay for their security, pay high T-fare because of bad roads and also pay tax monthly with nothing to show for it, if pilgrimage is d only way they will benefit directly from their government, I don't have any problem! Safe journey to you all.

The government doesnt pay for everyone.

If that is what men being babies is about, it is pretty simple then.

I wonder why I would have to be following his gaze though.That is like giving oneself unnecessary heart attack.

It is wrong to encourage bad habits. Making it the wife's duty to stop him from looking at other women is just not it with me. what happens when the wife is not there, when he is on a business trip, etc? He has no excuse at all. A man should take responsibility for his good and bad actions.

If these make him a baby, I dont want o. I dont want to marry a baby.

The ego part sha. Egocentric people have a big problem. I'd rather deal with someone who knows his limitations and admits them than one who wants to be right regardless. The one who knows these limitations is more likely to grow and to be successful. If his spouse cannot be the one to tell the absolute truth about his weaknesses and the need to improve, who would? just because he wants to feel good? feeling good on a false premise? No. He should grow up, I think.

@Sissie, is your definition same as tbaba's..pls come and explain .

Allah's Apostle offered the funeral prayers of the martyrs of Uhud eight years after (their death), as if bidding farewell to the living and the dead, then he ascended the pulpit and said, "I am your predecessor before you, and I am a witness on you, and your promised place to meet me will be Al-Haud (i.e. the Tank) (on the Day of Resurrection), and I am (now) looking at it from this place of mine. I am not afraid that you will worship others besides Allah, but I am afraid that worldly life will tempt you and cause you to compete with each other for it." That was the last look which I cast on Allah's Apostle.

Hadhrat Amr bin Auf (R.A.) narrates that Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam) said: "By Allah I do not fear poverty and starvation overtaking you, but I fear that you will have abundant wealth at your disposal as it had been at the disposal of the nations before you. You will then become extremely greedy in accumulating this wealth (showing no regard for Halaal and Haraam) just as the previous nations had done. This (greed) will be the cause of your ruin and destruction just as it destroyed the people before you". (Bukhari and Muslim)

kadree: An alfa once told me to do something similar.I only laughed(in my mind though)wen I left,I said to mysef"hey alfa,U̶̲̥̅̊ jst spoke to d wrong person".I dnt subscribe to tinx of such

Lesson to learn- Beware of Alfas

eminikan soso: This prayer from Sheik Kamaldeen Aly Adabiy RTA to Moulana Sheik Raheem Abata (Oniwasi Agbaye)
24 Rakats
12 Salamons
1st rakat; surat fatia and any Other surat
2nd rakat; surat fatia and any Other surat
1st salamon
Allahumon soliala seyina muhamadin waselim 33, Astagafurullahi 33, Alhamudulilai33, Lahilla illalahu 33
Bismillahir Ramon Rohim 1000.
This you repeat for 12 times and total 12000 Bismillahir Ramon Rohim
Offering #20 * 7 plus 7 sachets of salt to 7 beggars
This prayer I have try and withness the good result.
I swear by my life

If it is not from the prophet, it is not acceptable.

I didnt know of salatul ishraq and there is controversy on salatul tasbih.

May Allah guide us aright and make worship easy for us. amin.

opei: Nigeria will start airlifting this saturday (14/09/13). The flag of will take place in d north.
Pray that Allah grants all Nigerian delegates journey mercy (amen).
Wish somebori can pay ma ticket( omo i no mind o)...mie sef wan go insha Allah

me sef wan go o. But with my own money In sha Allah. May Allah make it easy.