₦airaland Forum

@ Mynd_44,
Wow thanks for the support, defending 9ja girls.

Expression of a heart that cares, be it in a spousal, sibling, motherly relationship.
I agree its an action verb n best validated by the actions that surrounding it.

Know who's lying,  observe their actions within the context of ur relationship.

To be loved and be in love,,  now that's heavenly!!!

Special

It means a lot to say those words,  when said sincerely I mean!!   

That's why it is demeaning when used as a punctuation mark rather than as an expression of a caring heart.

Mostly, when said really translates as I lust for you  , or I like you a lot.

Love,  not something you get within 2 mins of a meeting or interaction.

 

@ Mynd-44,

Some positive contribution wld be welcome.
Poor chap's confused enough without your taunts.

Hmm, thanks

If the story is true, TMZ as we know it. 
No pre- nups were in place then??

Wat a shiame. 

She has apologised,

,Why don't you reassess the situation,
Was she bi-curious or definitely bi-sexual??
It's obvious you have feelings for her otherwise thoughts of resuming the relationship won't cross your mind.

(Scratches her head,)

Could you please clarify?

Am I correct in presuming that you would want to have a dermal interface contact with another female homo sapiens whilst trying to achieve a chemically labile biologically modulated response which lasts for a 3 second transition into wrongly presumed cosmic realms. Only to start all over again to achieve the same shortlasting out of body experience?? ?
 

Hmmm, a good book will do.

At ur question, oops, can't help.    

@ Claremont, Mynd_44, iice,

Second ur posts.

But many girls have this neeeed to be told they are loved.

Then they are moved by the audio input rather visual, I suppose

Video is funny, but DO NOT subscribe to the BEAT HER ASS option

Now I know this is for laughs, but domestic violence shouldn't be tolerated in whatever form or manner


Phew, nuf sermon said

@ op, suppose you're right.

But if my actions depict my love, isn't that enough.

 

@ Mynd_44,

Wetin Mr Mynd,

it appears that my musings are causing you some degree of concern, not that they are of your concern.

How could I be of help to ease or alleviate your concerns.

   

Haba, ngwanu

It is well now.

Why e no go well.

When no reply from faakay
Anyways God dey     

   

It all seems dodgy.


The past is dodgy: he lied to his ex that another lady was pregnant for him to get a divorce. 

Has it crossed ur mind, that he may have left the email intentionally to be discovered, leading to ur present predicament,  you being unreasonable n breaking up as he originally planned. 

Playing the waiting game may get you into trouble, this guy possibly has you all worked out and will play you out no matter how smart you think you are.  Presently he holds all the aces.
Discussing wt a senior family member whom he holds in high esteem may help or backfire depending on ur chap's original plan. But it helps to place things out in the open, give you some credibility ( not appear like a psychotic woman ) and give ur chap fewer exits or maneuvers.

Most importantly, u need prayers at this point to gain divine direction.

Gut instinct, better to live as a mentally stable single mother than dwell in a bittersweet marriage that has you dwelling on the verge of insanity due to his self- centred, selfish devious attitude. 

(Doesn't he realise this is a precarious time for you??)

Really??    

I suppose beauty is in the eye of the beholder.   

Though downright ugla,  carriage, poise n good caring character wt some good heart felt rhymes still gets the gals.      

Not all women lie.

There's a difference between direct lies and omission of facts. It's important for both parties to shine eye well before getting deeper as men also play the same game too.

   

Pacing the floors:

Possibly found someoneelse to make babies with.
In 9 months, the cries of the babies will testify regarding faakay's whereabouts.

Dum Di dum Di dum.

@ faakay,

No reply?


( hmmm, Possibly having a rethink)

@ Opribo, some of your comments depict the era of the stone age.      
Are you to say that marriage is only about having children
2ndly, where is the scientific evidence behind OCPs or pills causing weakness of the womb??
A woman can still procreate well into her 50's, barring menopause or increased risk of having children with congenital problems.

Having a privy knowledge of sexuality trends of todays youth, it is surprising the number of dangerous things or trends our very young pple get up to. The mantra, "the younger they are, the more innocent they are" does not hold water. So Please speak from a position of knowledge when making accusations about the lack of reproductive organs, not hearsay or odd experiences.
Married women playing 'away' games have also been caught in this gynae mess.    


Beheading 35+ women ke?? What about 35+ men who have refused to settle down or bear children despite all pleas.
What's good for the goose is good for the gander.    


@ Lola4luv and Dentale, thanks for the support.    

Same needed.
Longbridge road courts, alt Saturdays pm.
Quite rusty,

Thanks.

Marriage is the end result of meeting someone you have grown to love and wanting a greater degree of permanence with him or her. It is not a means to an end.
It should not be seen as a status symbol, but as a celebration of love.

The question is, do u want to fall  and stay in love? The answer wl be yes for most people, I think.

Then, do you want to stay wt this person for better for worse ? Enjoying the fruits whilst enduring the discipline and sacrifice needed?? At this point, the ' love waxes cold'

Coming back to op:

So a yes for marriage wt its bittersweet cocktails.

But I'll work harder on getting the right person rather than getting married at all costs ( sometimes to an inappropriate person).

@ faakay,

You want to make babies??    

Fine, as a contact or non-contact donor? (Pass the product after self service)   
Do you have an all-clear valid not ' Oluwole'  certificate, stis,hiv,hpv et al    
What is ur jurisdiction, obviously not Pluto.
Any expected renumeration?
Any involvement in the finished products? Only pictures or would want further involvement and financial responsibility?

Any legal framework to be drawn up regarding involvement in various life stages, responsibilities, expectations and other issues if inclined.

Potential to get the courts involved if there is a failure on your part to fulfill obligations. 

Most importantly, what is ur DNA typology: IQ , EQ scores, physical attributes, need not mention joystick size as irrelevant, family diseases or condition, average familial generational life expectancy will be useful to know. 


Still want to make babies,     

@ Lacrissa,

Live and let live. Not all men r  for u or wl suit you. Be happy for your friends when they find love. It has a funny way of making you feel good too.

Be used as a source of blessings, not seeking gain from those you have blessed.
Remember it is more blessed to give than receive, as weird as that sounds.
So routinely going out of your way to help or bless ur friends may help curb ur feelings of jealousy at their success.

However, I wonder if these are true friends or girls u mix wt as a result of 'runs'  or simply casual acquaintances.
That may explain some of ur feelings. Then choosing your friends carefully, may be the way to go.

Hope these ideas help

@ shilling, meee, n, that's a total beauty sweat- out!.

Why not something very simples for 5  min pple like me
Shea butter Really,,  does it work??

Hmmmmm, clears throat rather noisily.

@Claremont, u sure u no dey chop and clear / clean mouth afterwards. 

It's rather unusual for 9ja chick to be like that if no be say she don catch una somewhere or deja vu from a previous relationship.

This op's chick was threatening suicide, now that's another level.   

9ja chick wl scatter for you n move on eventually; beta fish dey inside water, if she's still not happy; Abi how 4 do.
Suicide ke when life dey sweet. 

With this new revelations, e get as e bi.

U sure she didn't pick it up during operations, blood transfusions etc. As these r also sources of infection.

Divine intervention is needed here. U dey bold, bros to be having unprotected SI. There r different IVF techniques available for couples in ur situation.

Except if her viral load is pretty low.

God will help u in this matter,

It is  multi-factorial.

In the African setting, infidelity reigns supreme as a reason for breakdowns.

But it is well recognized that libido decreases during certain decades in both men n women.
Stress easily contributes to relationship breakdowns, distance, financial problems, children
's needs and wants
2rily, effects of modern day life n stresses can lead to hormonal imbalances worsening this problem
3rdly, amongst certain cultural nuances, upon completion of ur family; provision of a heir and spare(s,), lovemaking is considered a duty rather than a pleasure. A good number of women fake orgasms or project an image of having had mind-blowing se, x cos,  ( well, , that's what u guys want to hear, particularly in the early days). Once there is some degree of familiarity or other problems in the union, u see her for real. Once heard of a woman who used to study her textbook ahead of exams as her husband was pumping away on top.

For those women who feel less attractive as a result of weight gain or sagging womanliness, the problems become compounded.

Combating this disease:

Get to be each other's friend, talk n share a lot.
Marry for LOVE not for other spurious reasons
Have a God base
Re-ignite the embers of romance regularly, book a hotel away from the kids n spoil madam
If she finds it difficult to initiate, u r the priest of ur home, make your flames burn bright.

Rather than fantasize about ur secretary or co-worker, do so about ur wife. 

Heard of men who have paid for cosmetic surgery for their wives to be toned up.

However, we don't want a barbie doll. 

@ Shanay, realistic in choosing. Yes I'll agree to that, but not at the expense of living well below your status quo.
It may mean fishing in different waters, accepting the potential limitations or problems associated with that and making provisos available. A little academic but possible.

Stories abound of women marrying well below their status and reaping the fruits of an impatient, lazy, unproductive man plagued with a heavy dose of inferiority complex. Before the guys go off, no amount of biblical or cultural wifely submission can help.      .

However, in a scenario where the young man is hardworking, wt potential ( like 2 billion dollars not naira pleeeaaase in his account) the rules may be bent. !!!!!!   . 

Sounds like a psycho to me.

Emotional manipulator, she'll stick around as long as she can continue to get her way. Pple like this have little self respect.

As its been awhile, any news or she don get bele and you're playing happy families
    

1 corinthians 13: 1-8 defines love.
It exceeds the mushy mushy feelings we have n its expected raging wars on our sensibilities n sexualities, the steady forbearance wt a family member in the face of trouble, the easy camaraderie, friendliness. It's the somewhat difficult place of undeserved unrequited giving that really defines LOVE.

Hey, not asking you to be a doormat.   

The term is used rather loosely n describes the 1st 2 scenarios mostly.

Need some legal advice here mate.

Have all mediation efforts failed?? Tried understanding her.might just be insecurity, lack of maturity n ur impatience.
changing the documents to another relative's name could be a potential minefield: so many what ifs. What about incorporating them under a firm, tax issues may arise but hopefully it precludes her getting her hands on ur stuff.

Totally agree wt pendo89, prenups r the way. A little late now.   

Keep us posted, hopefully u repair ur home.

      

Y na?
There r some Naija women who r so looooooving too.
It's all about actions n reactions.

Not only to remove shoe n tie, but will give a bath n massage too.

Not that baaad at all.


Ehmm, clears throat,

Hmm, no Murano or Audi, but Bugatti pls: extra massage on the house