₦airaland Forum

What was the most stupid thing you ever did in your relationship(s)
In my last relationship,I went clubbing with my friend (girl) and her friends (guys)
And you know what,I actually wanted to tell my boyfriend but for the fact that the guys were in a hurry to leave
And then I didn't come back till after 2 dayz
The po-po-ri now was that i fell very ill, due to what i ate there and when i came back to school, i was hospitalized
Trust him, he threatened to call my parents
You know what that meant

I can't stand a non-challant guy

A little girl asked her mum severally why her dad divorced her
But each time her mum declined to answer because she was young
She told her little friend who promised to help her find out
Her mum went out one day and they decided to search her documents
Satisfied with what she found , the girl waited for her mum to get back
I now know why dad divorced u mum,it's because you have F[color=Black][/color] in SEX [color=Black][/color]

Hmmmn my dream job?
To work in a financial institution
But with some exceptions like;
dressing down (not comfortable with that suit and suit for banks )
Observing all public holidays
Having to go places
And of course taking home some mouthwatering salary

Ehi come and exchange with me naa
I will give my corper uniform and jungle boot
But you will gain cos you'll have to go for CDs

@ Nauttyprof, you be winch

IN PRISON
you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.
AT WORK
you spend most of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.
IN PRISON
you get three meals a day (free).
AT WORK
you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for it yourself.
IN PRISON
you get time off for good behavior.
AT WORK
you get rewarded for good behavior with more WORK.
IN PRISON
a guard locks and unlocks the doors for you.
AT WORK
you must carry around a security card and unlock open all the doors yourself.
IN PRISON
you can watch TV and play games.
AT WORK
you get fired for watching TV and playing games.
IN PRISON
you get your own toilet.
  AT WORK
you have to share.
IN PRISON
  they allow your family and friends to visit.
AT WORK
you can not even speak to your family and friends.
IN PRISON
 
all expenses are paid by taxpayers with no work at all.
AT WORK
you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for the prisoners.
Hmmm?



Which Sounds Better?
So what are you waiting for, 
Kill your Manager and earn the stress-free life in prison 

A jobless man applied for the position of "office boy" at Microsoft.
The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a
test.

"You are employed" he said. "Give me your e-mail address and I'll
send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may
start".

The man replied "But I don't have a computer, neither an email."
"I'm sorry", said the HR manager, "If you don't have an email, that
means you do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job."

The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only
$10 in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a
10Kg tomato crate. He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In
less than two hours, he succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the
operation three times, and returned home with $60.
The man realized that he can survive by this way, and started to go
everyday earlier, and return late. Thus, his money doubled or tripled
everyday.

Shortly, he bought a cart, then a truck, then he had his own fleet of
delivery vehicles. 5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food
retailers in the US . He started to plan his family's future, and decided
to have a life insurance. He called an insurance broker, and chose a
protection plan. When the conversation was concluded, the broker asked
him his email.

The man replied, "I don't have an email ". The broker answered
curiously, "You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to build an
empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an email?!!"
The man thought for a while and replied, " Yes, I'd be an office boy at Microsoft!"


Moral of the story
1. Internet /email is not the solution to your life.
2. If you don't have internet / email , and work hard, you can be a
millionaire.
3. If you received this message by email, you are probably already an
office boy/girl, and not any close to being a Billionaire. ,


Cheers and stay real,




P.S - Do not forward this email back to me, I' m closing my email & going to sell tomatoes?!!

A jobless man applied for the position of "office boy" at Microsoft.
The HR manager interviewed him then watched him cleaning the floor as a
test.

"You are employed" he said. "Give me your e-mail address and I'll
send you the application to fill in, as well as date when you may
start".

The man replied "But I don't have a computer, neither an email."
"I'm sorry", said the HR manager, "If you don't have an email, that
means you do not exist. And who doesn't exist, cannot have the job."

The man left with no hope at all. He didn't know what to do, with only
$10 in his pocket. He then decided to go to the supermarket and buy a
10Kg tomato crate. He then sold the tomatoes in a door to door round. In
less than two hours, he succeeded to double his capital. He repeated the
operation three times, and returned home with $60.
The man realized that he can survive by this way, and started to go
everyday earlier, and return late. Thus, his money doubled or tripled
everyday.

Shortly, he bought a cart, then a truck, then he had his own fleet of
delivery vehicles. 5 years later, the man is one of the biggest food
retailers in the US . He started to plan his family's future, and decided
to have a life insurance. He called an insurance broker, and chose a
protection plan. When the conversation was concluded, the broker asked
him his email.

The man replied, "I don't have an email ". The broker answered
curiously, "You don't have an email, and yet have succeeded to build an
empire. Can you imagine what you could have been if you had an email?!!"
The man thought for a while and replied, " Yes, I'd be an office boy at Microsoft!"


Moral of the story
1. Internet /email is not the solution to your life.
2. If you don't have internet / email , and work hard, you can be a
millionaire.
3. If you received this message by email, you are probably already an
office boy/girl, and not any close to being a Billionaire. ,


Cheers and stay real,




P.S - Do not forward this email back to me, I' m closing my email & going to sell tomatoes?!!

yes i hv
but mine is different becos it' the opposite of what you people are talking about
I actually said I didn't hv a guy while i had one useless boy friend
What about that

I love  what I do
Can't call it my jobyet cause am still serving
I have always wanted a bank job and that's what am doing right now
Boring though

I love what I do
Can't call it my jobyet cause am still serving
I have always wanted a bank job and that's what am doing right now
Boring though

just be very careful girl
can't discourage you if u love this guy
but make sure u r at peace with your family as well
I know a man of God who married an osu against his family's wish
They lived 4 15 years without an heir and then the woman died of mysterious sickness
Just be sure of what you do

I did not vote
registerd in Ikoyi
live  in Okota
But  thank God Fasola won not Koro

Fasola won
But STAR01 what do you mean by Koro winning?
Not on his life,
we don't need people who burn their offices when EFCC tries to probe into their affairs

can't stop giggling

@ Rhodalyn, where did u get your shaky bum-bum

One evening an 80 year old farmer decided to go down to his pond, as he hadn't been there for a while, and look it over.

He grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard
voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a circle of young women skinny-dipping in his pond.

He then made the women aware of his presence and they all went to the deep end.

One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave!"

The old man frowned, "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or make you get out of the pond naked."

Holding the bucket up he said, "I'm here to feed the alligator i’m keeping in there."



Hey, the girls came screaming out of the pond in a jiffy!!!!!

Moral of the story: Some old men can still think fast,

What are you people even talking about
Not that am supporting the lady
But i think the man himself is MUMU[color=Black][/color]
Does he have a degree?,because if he does he should be able to tell that she's been lying
Does'nt he know what a certificate looks like?
MUGU FALL, AROBA CHOP

What's the spelling of LOVE
If he can keep something like that from the girl,
why then talk about love when the girl decides to run
For me, I will with my heels touching my head ooo

Ndipe:
It is not sick,@swiftycool, but an abberation from our culture for a man to take on his wife's last name.

Does it mean he can take her first name
like Angelina

@ 18, you should also have the right to kill yourself
Haven't you considered that

I will answer when it has happened
For now I reserve my comments

12 years aint that bad
As far as the LOVE is there
But i wouldn't

BlackMamba:
Another veiled reason to get a man to severe his unconditional love for his parents.

yOU MUST BE A BUUUUUUSH MAN
yOUR LIFE TIRE ME

Crude Oil:
I know say na girl go ask this kind of useless question.

Why is it a useless topic to you
May be you are a village boy and don't know what kiss is
Fellow Nairalanders can you please spell it to him
Wait, abi u b heamophro,
I reserve my comment

near rape
accident on my way back to school

no comments

I think dat's the best thing that can happen for anyone
Dating your friend,gives you the opportunity to talk about most intimate things
, But arrangee dating is nothing to write home about