₦airaland Forum

Kazim88:
His reaction to the event was the pivot to his crisis but not the event.

If I have a contact that is very rich politician, Why in the hell will I go and beg him money with my pregnant wife?

Why will I go and do pity me party at his house.

I will make him my patron, and sell anything from furniture, to clothes, to general services to even Ideas.

The moment you beg, you have destroy your self-worth.

Marriage doesn't make people beg or work hard.

It's only reveal your true self to the world.

Untill you get married, you won't know what you capable of doing. Good or bad.

I don't know what u r talking about. We are are discussing how some people can be pressured into crime/fraud.
There is no "true self". Anybody can gradually be turned into somebody who can do anything,, including murder.
Many life situations can "reveal your true self"

rex21:
How many people in the old days that stayed unmarried because of wealth ??
You rightly said, the wealthy married many because they can cater for them, the less privileged ones married as their might could carry. Who are you even doing parties for sef, na wa o. Are you living for the society ??

You say everything i listed can be achieved without being married, did you see where i initially wrote legal

My guy, i ddnt say rush into marriage now. I said if you can date her, then you can marry her

The comment i quoted was centered on this.

I'm not married and i'm not dating. When i can do one, then i can do both. Thats my conviction

I know u r not too dumb to see the flaw in what u r saying. There are about equal number of men and women born. If some men married many women, some men would necessarily be unmarried. It's simple math.
Once again u r talking like someone who lives alone on an island. Marriage comes with certain societal expectations. You CAN'T not try to meet them, just like u CAN'T just put your dead in the ground in Igbo land without spending money - as moslems can do.

You did say rush into marriage - that's what u r doing when u marry when u r not ready to meet societal expectations of a normal marriage.

ityP:
Leave Bill gates out of this. Heck, leave the whites out of this. Their marital life is totally different from ours. Once they are not feeling it, they move. Low key, they don't see marriage as an everlasting union. We Africans do. Money stops so many nonsense in African homes. A man is not a man in Nigeria if he doesn't have money. It's not same abroad. Woman go be breadwinner for America and it is seen as totally normal. In naija, the man will be ridiculed, both by his immediate family and the community

See my post above. You sorta are on point, but also sorta missed the point

Swinger60:
smiles, this your post Sha.

can you please explain to me why Bill gate even with his money still got divorced? (I think I read one time that his wife is dating a high school teacher).

His money couldn't keep his wife.

what one should be praying for In this life..., is that we marry our person, who will love and stay loyal to us through thick and thin.

Money doesn't stop any Nonsense in marriage, trust me. Nonsense bound to happen in marriage will happen. Money or no Money.

They divorced precisely because of money - she stood to get billions by divorcing him. If it were in Naija she won't divorce him. NEVER! Because she'd be poor without him. So u actually proved that it is all about money!

rex21:
I'll marry
1. To legalise my relationship (bf/gf)
2. For companionship
3. To build a home
4. To have a partner especially in old age
5. To have children that will also provide the above (in due time)

In marriage, money is important but marriage transcends money my brother. Our fathers before our grandfathers married with little or nothing except large farmlands. Standards were low then, nobody was thinking of plush weddings or some friends and neighbours to impress. If we do not reduce this money mentality, even in wealth, one's marriage will still have problems. Is there anything like enough money ?? E nor dey. Human wants is insatiable. I'd really like to engage you in a civil conversation if we'll be pragmatic and converse with open minds.

Bottom line if you think you can keep and maintain a girlfriend then you can as well marry her legally

I'm being very pragmatic. U r the one talking as if you live on an island and not in society. In the old days that u mentioned marriage involved having money - the rich married many wives while some poor had none. Mattiage always involved bride price and ceremonies and inviting society to witness your union.
BTW everything u listed above can be accomplished without marriage. So again, why rush into marriage NOW? Why??

rex21:
You ddnt ask any direct question sir

See the bolded below

Kazim88:
OP, To a large extent, you "appear" to be right but you are not. Let me explain.

Marriage brings out the YOU in you, like an orange you will be squeez and your hidden personality will be revealed.

When I got married, I was rich, When the inevitable, unavoidable bills start rolling in it brought out the Entrepreneur and hustling spirit within.

It was make it or go to jail.

If deep inside I was someone that could beg for aid from my friends, family or leader, I would had beg but I wasn't.

If I was a fraudster, I would had pick up laptop but I wasn't.

In summary, marriage will accelerate yourself discovery.

Exactly why some end up in jail or become fraudsters. So how is OP wrong?

rex21:
Na wa o, Are you getting married for a ceremony ??
One gets married for a number of reasons, according to social studies. Marriage is not centered around children.

You didn't answer the question

Emerie22:
How come?

Pochettino was being sarcastic. Women give life flavor

IamHonourable1:
OP let me tell you something you don't know,even as a rich guy,I won't marry a woman who has no financial backing.

If u r very rich, it won't matter. But if u r just average struggling rich, u r right

rex21:
And who said ts compulsory to brandish all these before one's marriage will be termed legal ??

So u won't have kids, u won't have any ceremonies, etc.
Explain to us why u r getting married

NNEWIsuper:
What the guy said made no sense. For one you're living your life for yourself and not the society, explain to me how it makes sense to start popping out kids in poverty bc the society expects you to do so, meanwhile they won't partake in your suffering. Make una open una eyes and stop suffering yourselves

You ignored everything I said about wedding ceremonies and bride prices, and aseobi, and inlaws, and visitors, and various expectations (example, a single can sleep anywhere and leave any time).
It is not only kids that make marriage eaxpensive.

Klass99:
Lol, enjoy.

I stopped reading at Page 1, because I know how the thread will go........

There'll be two factions and comments will be divided along the lines of practicality (or sensibility if you like) and religiousity.

Or am I wrong? As you have followed the thread, tell me if I'm right or wrong.

well, u r wrong. The thread has followed the path of realism (a poor person is poor for a reason and will likely stay poor) and exuberant optism (a poor person may become a millionaire tomorrow)

Rubbiish:
Lol
Marry first before u start talking
We all sounded like this!
If u are not ready to start having kids, do not get married! A marriage without kids is not a blessed marriage! Not even your parents will support u on this. U must have at least one kid to bless that marriage. When u marry without a child, that marriage will so empty, only married people can relate. Why do u think everyone end up having kids after marriage?

NNEWIsuper, listen to experience.
Also, dating someone does not involve wedding ceremonies and pride prices and aseobi and inlaws and visitors, and various expectations. etc.

rex21:
Biko nwa nne send me your email lemme mail you one cold bottle of beer for this post. This just shows that there are still mature and pragmatic thinkers here on nairaland.

If you can date someone, you certainly can marry that person MrBrownJay1


I don preach this message tire.

But dating someone does not involve wedding ceremonies and pride price and aseobi and inlaws and visitors, and expectation of children, etc.
U r both wrong.

redirect:
MY BROTHER GOD BLESS YOU, MANY GUYS TODAY ARE VICTIM.

seeme2 these are people with practical experience, not "he may become a millionaire within a year"

Klass99:
Na lie e no go sweet, because this is an over flogged topic/issue on NL.

See, you wrong. The thread still sweet

dedunji:
The main reason for marriage na to get legal pikin that can take care of ur old age .what's the essence of getting married in 2021 and be waiting to have money in 2027 before u can pregnant ur woman choi . Na this cain write up dey make some men go dey 65 years while their first son is 7years that one name wasted life naa .Igbo people talk say Nwa ka Ego

See this one still with this antiquated thinking. Don't plan your own retirement and how to be comfortable in it. Wait for "legal pikin that can take care of ur old age"!

seeme2:
I hope you deserve that your wife, gentleman OP. You derived the wrong conclusion from life. What a waste of your sufferings. Look, i am 35. I have had great times, and rainy days. These things come and go and come again. Just get married when you can predict your stability for the next couple of years. People get married with meager income and get millions within a year. Some have already bought their life's last car before marrying. Head or tail, marrying early is best. It is the foundation of wealth. Your children have no choice but to manage... they are too small to be corrupted. God may bless you before your first born is old enough to be impressionable. If you wait till money comes who says it cannot go again. So you wait till 70 because it goes and comes?

Look, marriage is more economical than singleness... that is if you are a classy guy sha. Take the easier way and thank me later.

@bolded u r saying the same thing OP is saying. Your point that things may change tomorrow is not how we make choices in life. Yes, Dangote may go bankrupt tomorrow and, yes,, Usain Bolt may run last - but we don't make choices in life based on such. Yes, a lazy, uneducated, drunkard may become a millionaire tomorrow, but you don't choose your life-long partner based on such.

udoji2021:
They will even start quoting Bible that you will obtain favor from God. So people like Paul that never married nko!

This motivational speakers are a problem to our societies nowadays.







Marriage is for the rich jor

@bolded

It is not

ONE TRULY GIFTED DUDE!!
HBD

ERockson:
Nothing do you our amiable incoming president

God forbid bad thing

4e3

#ObiCubana for president

He understands the country from ground up, he is fully homegrown not with one foot abroad, plus he is a fresh face not another recycled looting poitician, and
he studied political science!

** Obi Cubana, if you run, run for president NOT governor. Remember Trump would have been laughed out of state if he had run governor, yet he won the presudency! You have a chance. The youth will stand behind you!

aribisala0:
or about two toes

I wonder what this has to do with the Yoruba expression

"Ika kan..........

Or 3 fingers. See how tricky they are??!

bukatyne:


Go and free Igboho and leave me alone

Was I lying? People don't read the fine print, then start complaining

FREE IGBOHO!!!

bukatyne:
I am wondering too.

If they are doing any reproductive organ test, it should be pregnancy.

Thank God it is scrapped.

E be things!

Scrapped? Notice they said nothing about one-finger testing

Femmyfestus:
F**k this slawormiir guy above

Sorry bro, he stole your FTC. Congrats on your FTC slawormiir. Maybe you'll now stop scamming and destroying people. I know your conscience go dey worry you. You dey try cover am with weed and liquor

So what do we drink??

engrelvis:
V u left d shores of dis country once? Don't rely on everything u watch on TV n google.Am nt small boy( almost 50).i don waka for dis world bro.

See below