Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,152,666 members, 7,816,719 topics. Date: Friday, 03 May 2024 at 03:53 PM

Funmeme's Posts

Nairaland Forum / Funmeme's Profile / Funmeme's Posts

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (of 14 pages)

Politics / Re: Joe Igbokwe: Please Stop Patience Jonathan by funmeme(f): 12:40pm On Jul 17, 2013
taharqa2: Just a point of correction: Joe Igbokwe is d ACN Publicity Secretary, Lagos State...... That's all I want to say. You COWARDS may howeva continue to shamelessly attacking a man by attacking his wife. All d best with that..

We don't care who the reporter is, all we care about is the report cos its the truth and many Nigerians consent to it. Let Mrs Jonathan be called to order! Lobatan.
Politics / Re: Al-Mustapha Discharged And Acquitted By Appeal Court by funmeme(f): 2:38pm On Jul 12, 2013
And I made it.... O my my...

Space reserved!!!
Health / Re: 53-year-old Woman Gives Birth To Twins After 20 Years Of Childlessness by funmeme(f): 9:06pm On Jul 02, 2013
emk4lif: Thank goodness she din't claim some God was responsible....the beauty of science.....

A fool will always be foolish no matter what...

Every good gift comes from above, it can only be God and we give Him the glory...

2 Likes

Literature / Re: Story: Taking Chances by funmeme(f): 7:53pm On Jun 21, 2013
I caught d annointing...good job I must say. Keep up the good work.
Politics / Re: Fashola Hated School Failed Waec & Almost Became A Mechanic by funmeme(f): 11:42am On Jun 19, 2013
I just love this man...
Politics / Re: 35 Governors Voted During NGF Election – Fayemi by funmeme(f): 5:23pm On May 28, 2013
thelastpope10:

Who is the looser? The man with 19 governors lined up behind him or the man who cannot call for a meeting? Please buy a dictionary or use dicitonary.com. You are not making sense

You are the one not making any sense here at all, don't u know about politics ni? Do u expect those who voted against J to step out and say so? U and I knw d nxt issue if they do. Politics is a dirty game full of pretence.
Politics / Re: Will You Vote For Jonathan In The Forthcoming Election? by funmeme(f): 3:36pm On Apr 08, 2013
I never voted him in the first place cos I saw all this trash ahead. Those saying YES re bunch of hypocrites... We re moving 4ward come 2015, no more stangnancy or going back.
Religion / Re: What Striking Thought Of Jesus Is On Your Mind This Good Friday? by funmeme(f): 9:04am On Mar 29, 2013
HE did it just for me...
Business / Re: Charged N10,000 For Collecting Western-Union With Incorrect ID by funmeme(f): 12:48pm On Feb 23, 2013
doctokwus:
OSo much in a hurry to pay dem dis bribe,which I guess was deducted frm d mony u sent.Smells scam to me

Seriously enh, a lot of things happen in the banking system that is unbelievable. This has happened to me b4 too, UBA {moneygram}. I was asked to open a current account with the money b4 I can collect it though I had my int'l pp wit me and u knw wat that means, I wnt be able to withdraw all the money of which I needed it urgently for my mom.

I had to beg one of their customers who had a Dom/current acct to help me sign off b4 I cud get the money, base on agreement that he will get a % but d guy later letgo of the% sha.

Another option wud av been to bribe d bank' staff, cos I needed d money like....

@Op trust me ur brother is onpoint, I probly wud av done same 'if' in his shoes.
Business / Re: Charged N10,000 For Collecting Western-Union With Incorrect ID by funmeme(f): 11:18am On Feb 23, 2013
doctokwus:
So much in a hurry to pay dem dis bribe,which I guess was deducted frm d mony u sent.Smells scam to me

Seriously enh, a lot of things happen in the banking system that is unbelievable. This has happened to me b4 too, UBA {monegram}. I was asked to open a current account with the money b4 I can collect it though I had my int'l pp wit me and u knw wat that means, I wnt be able to withdraw all the money of which I needed it urgently for my mom.

I had to beg one of the customer who had a Dom acct to help me sign off b4 I cud get the money, base on agreement that he will get a % but d guy later letgo of the% sha.

Another option wud av been to bribe d bank' staff, cos I needed d money like....

@Op trust me ur brother is onpoint, I probly wud av done same in 'if' in his shoes.
Romance / Re: How To Survive Valentine’s Day When You’re Single by funmeme(f): 11:02am On Feb 01, 2013
I use this opportunity to invite singles to come mingle on 16th of feb at no34 Benson street, off akerele road slere lagos.the old school for costume ball

Dress code:Vintage

The programme promises to be interesting, full of fun such as games,comedy,fashion show,dance, DJ to give us cool oldies, debate,food, drinks and many more..

Gatefee is N2000
VIP N5000
You don't wanna miss this...
Politics / Re: 36 States Of Nigeria And Their Meanings by funmeme(f): 5:56pm On Jan 31, 2013
Educative,informative and interesting... Thanks iyani something

1 Like

Car Talk / Re: BRT Bus Involved In Road Accident by funmeme(f): 6:13pm On Jan 10, 2013
smakati: Those BRT drivers can be reckless.....they seem to think they have an immunity from being prosecuted........One almost hit me on their lane while I was tying to link the express from the feeder lane at athony.......the useless bully just wanted to try and intimidate a smaller vehicle

That's what they do, may God help them, one hit my car yesterday at Ajose Adeogun, seriously destroyed one of d doors. Don't knw. How 2upload pictures, wud av.
Fashion / Re: The Beauty Of Shea Butter(ori)(kadanya) by funmeme(f): 9:00pm On Jan 03, 2013
chacha3: As for me I used it on my new born baby and noticed rashes over his body esp on his face,it was really bad I had to go and see a doctor so I stopped using the shea butter on him. Different strokes for different folks. I may try using it personally shaa.

Maybe you bought the fake one, only the fake reacts badly as such..
Family / Re: Can You Allow Your Child To Live With Another Person? by funmeme(f): 8:39pm On Jan 02, 2013
Its a NO! NO! NO! For me...

I stayed with my Aunty while growing up and I went through hell[sub][/sub]

I was made to do all the work within n outside the house, though I'm better for it today cos there's notin I can't do.

Several beatings nko, for mundane things.. I went tru hell but neve had d guts to tell my mom anytime she visits cos I was scared I could be killed through beating after she's gone. Thank God for my dad dat rescued me wen I eventually summoned d courage to tell him wen I visited dem on holliday at age 16

I made up my mind from little dat I'll never allow my child stay wit anyone no matter d situation. I can allow he\she 2 go on holliday o but stay permanent? Never..
Romance / Re: Barrister Fred Agabje Bombshell! Only 25% Of Nigerian Women Are Wife Materials! by funmeme(f): 2:11pm On Dec 04, 2012
Gentle Naaz: 1.Among naija ladies, 1 in evry 20 is a wife material
2. Among naija men, 1 in evry 40 is a husbnd material

Gbam!!!
Family / Re: Staying With Someone: How Long Is Too Long by funmeme(f): 10:51am On Nov 28, 2012
Echika China: U are definitely not a good person ........ Cant believe you said two weeks.......... What difference will two weeks make

Why are u all gettinghis message wrong, Do u all av problems with understanding what u read? He said when you don't do all what he listed, den 2wks is cool and ofcos dat's his opinion ofwhich 2wks is a long time 2inconvinient someone na.
Celebrities / Re: Davido To Launch O.B.O Clothing Line Next Year by funmeme(f): 12:36pm On Nov 27, 2012
Brainrex: What is the meaning OBO?

Simply means Omo Baba Olowo...
Could also mean OBO= Monkey
Or OBO= pussy...

1 Like

Romance / Re: When Looking For A Potential Life Partner,what Are Your Top 3 Criteria by funmeme(f): 2:43pm On Nov 21, 2012
k2039: The question is straight forward.

Ofcourse I understand we all have more than three criteria in choosing our potential life partner,but for the purpose of this thread,just your three topmost criteria.

For those who are married,what were the three topmost criteria that made you marry your spouse.


For me my 3 criteria are:

BEAUTY: She has to be beautiful
INTELIGIENCE: She has to be smart and intelligient
RELIGION: She has to be a christian,a deep one,preferably an intercessor.


All this I've got...oops.
Car Talk / Re: Has A Kid Ever Scratched Your Car? Like Written A, B. C... by funmeme(f): 5:46pm On Nov 02, 2012
It happened a day after I bought my baby boy, d kid drew a line from d bonnet to the boot n wen I saw it I almost fainted but I jst had to letgo cos dia was no kid around to even vent ma anger nor adult to report to...very annoying cos dey ve done it ova n ova again dat wen I see anytin on ma car now, I dnt boda again. God 4giv dat child.
Romance / Re: Do The People We Attract Tell Something About Us? by funmeme(f): 1:27pm On Oct 29, 2012
In Chapter 9 of John C.maxwell 21 Irrefutable laws of Leadership, he explained dat "Who you are is who you attract". In most situations, you draw people to you who pocess the same qualities you do. I tnk I agree with him.

1 Like

Politics / Re: Okada Riders Damaged 42 Buses – LAGBUS, LAMATA by funmeme(f): 2:25pm On Oct 24, 2012
Seriously, I see no reason why okada riders should destroy anything, if you chek so well, the barn of bikes on the highway is for their own good and for the good of lagosians including those dat were killed or presently in the hospital due to okada accident.

If u chek it, 70% of the okada riders are from the north, they left their farm to come start okada business of which they have no idea they jst ride on with no care. Left to me, I'll say they should go back to their farming in the north afterall before bike came we were surving and we shall survive this aswell.
Politics / Re: Constitution Review: I'll Abide By What Nigerians Want - Jonathan by funmeme(f): 2:06pm On Oct 17, 2012
I'll always respect Fashola...u make a lot of sense.
Politics / Re: Pictures Of Murdered Students Of Mubi Polytechnic by funmeme(f): 2:02pm On Oct 04, 2012
samkoro: Differences Between Muhammad and Jesus

Mohamed-claimed he was not sure of heaven.Thus u alway say -may peace be unto him.pbuh

Jesus-Is in heaven. Moslems believe he is the only one who has so far made heaven

Muhammad..forced his adopted
son(Zaid Ibn Harithah) to unwillingly divorce his beautifull new wife Zaynab for him to marry. Surah 33:37-50. King david fail into a similar temptation with another mans wife but Jehovah rebuked him

Jesus..tought principles of faithfullness and good marriage.

Mohamed./Allah--.authorised Mutah- a form of prostitution Surah 4:24 ,surah 5:87

Jesus--never

Mohamed/Allah--Permits husbands to beat their wives for misbehaviour.Surah 4:34

Jesus--never did

Mohamed--Allah claimed to lead astray to hell.Surah 16:93, 13:27b, 25:8-9, 42:44,surah74:31

Jesus- Jehovah never does that.His words never changes

Mohamed--Allah says all black people must go to hell and that he hates the blackman.Surah 70:21,surah 17:100, (Mishkat vol III,page 117)

Jesus--promised those who believe in Jehovah haven sent him as a sacrifice to cleanse the sin of Adam that we inherited,and live righteously as christians,shall gain salvation and make heaven

Mohamed-said there is no moslem that shall not go to hell .Surah 19:71-72. After hundreds of thousands of years in hell Allah will then look at the ZEBIBA(sign of prostration) and then poor water of life on their skeletons to regain flesh b4 meeting the virgin. What a long route if its true.But this false hood.

The bible truth is that no one that goes to hell comes out.Mohamed said that only 700000 of his followers will enter paradise.
Mohamed.. Said Allah hates those who don't accept Islam.
(Qur'an 30:4, 3:32, 22:38)

Jesus. Said God loves everyone. 
(John 3:16)

Mohamed "I have been commanded to fight
against people till they testify that there
 is no god but Allah, and that Muhammad
 is the messenger of Allah"
(Muslim 1:33)

Jesus. "He who lives by the sword
will die by the sword."
(Matthew 26:52)

Mohamed. Stoned women for adultery.
(Muslim 4206)

Jesus. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."
(John 8:7)

Mohamed. Permitted stealing from unbelievers.
(Bukhari 44:668, Ibn Ishaq 764)

Jesus. "Thou shalt not steal."
(Matthew 19:18)

Mohamed. Permitted lying.
(Sahih Muslim 6303, Bukhari 49:857)

Jesus. "Thou shalt not bear false witness."
(Matthew 19:18)

Mohamed. Owned and traded slaves.
(Sahih Muslim 3901)

Jesus. Neither owned nor traded slaves.

Mohamed. Beheaded 800 Jewish men and boys.
(Sahih Muslim 4390)

Jesus. Beheaded no one.

Mohamed Murdered those who insulted him.
(Bukhari 56:369, 4:241)

Jesus. Preached forgiveness.
(Matthew 18:21-22, 5:38)

Mohamed. "If then anyone transgresses
the prohibition against you,
Transgress ye likewise against him"
(Qur'an 2:194)

Jesus. "If someone strikes you on the right
cheek, turn to him the other also."
(Matthew 5:39)

Mohamed. Jihad in the way of Allah elevates one's position in Paradise by a hundred fold.
(Muslim 4645)

Jesus "Blessed are the peacemakers, for
they will be called Sons of God"
(Matthew 5:9)

Mohamed. Married 13 wives and kept sex slaves.
(Bukhari 5:268, Qur'an 33:50)

Jesus. Was celibate.

Mohamed. Slept with a 9-year-old child.
(Sahih Muslim 3309, Bukhari 58:236)

Jesus. Did not Be Intimate with children.

Mohamed. Ordered the murder of women.
(Ibn Ishaq 819, 995)

Jesus Never harmed a woman. 

Mohamed. "O you who believe!  Fight those of the
 unbelievers who are near to you
and let them find in you hardness."
(Qur'an 9:123)

Jesus "Blessed are the meek, for
they shall inherit the earth."
(Matthew 5:5)

Mohamed. Ordered 65 military campaigns
and raids in his last 10 years.
(Ibn Ishaq )

Jesus Ordered no military campaigns, nor
offered any approval of war or violence. 
 

Mohamed Killed captives taken in battle.
(Ibn Ishaq 451)

Jesus Never took captives.
Never killed anyone.

Mohamed Encouraged his men to Molestation enslaved women.
(Abu Dawood 2150, Qur'an 4:24)

Jesus Never encouraged Molestation.
Never enslaved women. 

Mohamed. Demanded captured slaves and
a fifth of all other loot taken in war.
(Qur'an 8:41)

Jesus "The Son of Man came not
to be served, but to serve."
(Matthew 20:28)

Mohamed. Was never tortured, but tortured others.
(Muslim 4131, Ibn Ishaq 436, 595, 734, 764)

Jesus Suffered torture, but never tortured anyone.

Mohamed. "And fight them until there is no more persecution and religion is only for Allah"
(Qur'an 8:39)

Jesus. "Love your enemies and pray
for those who persecute you"
(Matthew 5:44)

Mohamed Blessed the brutal murder of a half-blind man
(al-Tabari 1440)

Jesus Healed a blind man
(Mark 8:28)

Mohamed Ordered a slave to build the very pulpit
from which he preached Islam.
(Bukhari 47:743)

Jesus Washed his disciples feet.
(John 13:5)

Mohamed What are the Greatest Commandments?
"Belief in Allah and Jihad in His cause"
(Muslim 1:149)

Jesus What are the Greatest Commandments?
"Love God and love thy neighbor as thyself."
(Matthew 22:34-40)

Mohamed Demanded the protection of armed bodyguards, even in a house of worship
(Qur'an 4:102)

Jesus Chastised anyone attempting
to defend him with force.
(John 18:10-12)

Mohamed Died fat and wealthy from what was
taken from others in war or
demanded from others in tribute.

Jesus Demanded nothing for himself. 
Died without possessions.

Mohamed Advocated crucifying others.
(Qur'an 5:33, Muslim 16:4131)

Jesus gave his life for others, Was crucified himself.

Mohamed. According to his followers:
Had others give their lives for him.
(Sahih Muslim 4413)

Jesus. According to his followers:
Gave his life for others.
(John 18:11 and elsewhere

So no muslem can faulth dis so far All glory and tnks to Jesus for all He has done.my advice, Let the light[JESUS] come into ur life.
Politics / Re: Northern Muslims Demand N105bn Compensation From FG For Genocide by funmeme(f): 12:06pm On Oct 04, 2012
Its called "try ur luck" un4tun8ly FG wnt be dumb to guck it.
Health / Re: 8 Easiest Ways To Lose Weight by funmeme(f): 10:55am On Oct 03, 2012
This makes a lot of sense 2me..

Thanks.
Nairaland / General / Re: Superstitious Beliefs That Actually Works! by funmeme(f): 1:36pm On Sep 25, 2012
If u spit on the floor and another person steps on it, u will av sore throat. It works a lot of time...wonder y...
Food / Re: Pictures Of Nigerian Dishes by funmeme(f): 12:19pm On Sep 17, 2012
Now I'm hungry...
Fashion / Re: Accessories You Hate Seeing On Guys by funmeme(f): 10:06am On Sep 04, 2012
tjskii: A long chain with a big fat pendant,nestling among the chest hair blleuurgghh

Guuuuuuushhhhhhhh I hate to see it on men, not dislike O, HATE.
Romance / Re: LADIES: Can You Marry A Guy That You Are Taller Than? by funmeme(f): 10:02am On Sep 04, 2012
Pls keep d comments coming, I'm seeing ma friend today and I want to show her people's opinion on dis. I like some comments I've seen so far n I'm sure dis will help.

Thanks peeps

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (of 14 pages)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 60
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.