₦airaland Forum

The government itself is benefiting from the insecurity. They see it as a way to distract the populace from their nefarious acts.

Congratulations to MFM's Choir Group.

donproject2:
Nigerians and complaining, "people can process it," lol.

The biggest challenge of Nigeria is people like you who do not have good plans in place. How do you make such major announcement and expect people should adjust by Monday?

Is it possible to make such announcements two weeks ahead so that people can process it and make necessary amendments before the start date?

The irritation is when the blogger talks about the video for 75% of the video length.

To the clowns saying history is not important, you are a larger part of the Nigerian problem.

One of the reasons for the show of shame on here where we read about ethnic and religious divide is because we do not understand our history as a people. The reason why we are easily manipulated.

The way we go about this politicking is irritating. May the soul of the orderly rest in perfect peace.

BlindAngel:
We didn't discussed anything regarding name change during courtship, If I told her to change her name today, she'd do it. But she's supposed to know that I don't need to remind her and change it already, that's my pain.

Uncle, you will need grow up a bit. There's no law that states that a woman must pick up the husband's name. It is only an assumption and in marriage, assumption doesn't work. If this was a big deal, you should have discussed it. Since you did not, you can lead her to do it for you since you would want to. If you want her to change her name to yours, you should do it lovingly and not trying to lord it. The reason I am reiterating that most of the cheer leaders here are not married and have no idea what it means to have a good home.

BlindAngel:
My family are not dictating things in our home, I have insisted that my pastor must officiate the naming, but when my family heard that she said it's her pastor that must do it, they joined me in insisting that it must be done by our pastor.

Why must anyone join you in insisting who names your son? Is your pastor not a man like you? Why not for the sake of peace use a neutral pastor amongst your friends if you think you cannot name your son by yourself? Stop running your affairs with people. Truth is at the end, all consequences are borne by you and your spouse and not family members.

BlindAngel:
I'm the one paying the bills of course, yesterday I was angry and told her to buy all the maltina and meat pie then she can call her pastor to officiate the naming. She went silent and started calling me wicked, and heartless. I spent almost 400k on her CS spent 73k on the naming but it's time to make a decision and she want to make it.

During our marriage, her mother refused to appear in the church because I said I won't do court marriage, I saw it on my wife chat with her elder sister, she said her mom said she won't come because I'm thinking rubbish by not doing court marriage. And truly she didn't come.

Brother, you need therapy and counselling. You don't have to respond to all post.

BlindAngel:
Her mom already left their father when they were still young, she was brought up by a single mom.

Last year someone told me that while they were still married her mom was bringing small boys into their matrimonial bed to sex, on the day of our traditional marriage, one mama that lives close to where I lives called me to the corner and said she has a lot to tell me, after the traditional marriage I went to see her and she told me that my wife elder sister is doing runs which I I'm very much aware of, because she came to visit me one day, her and my wife that was when she was still my girlfriend, and she was boosting that no boy will and can ever Bleep her for free. Even her post on whatsapp status is all about sex and Bleep, smoke etc.

She told me also that her mom was once bringing young boys into their house while still married that she lived close to her before.

I didn't noticed any of this trait on my wife, "then girlfriend" and I haven't still noticed despite monitoring and cloning her WhatsApp.

You are highly immature running your mouth like tap on here. You knew all these, decided to go with her, and now throw shades at those from single parent home. Oga, please go and focus on your life and learn to filter the things you hear and write. Na beg I dey otherwise, you dey create bigger problems for yourself.

BlindAngel:
Worst of it all I have already started hearing storing flying around that she's controlling me, all because I gave in for her to allow her pastor officiate the wedding.
I refused and she told me that my mom is controlling me, even though my mom has absolutely nothing to do for me wanting our pastor to do the naming. I, my mom and all my siblings are attending same church, so that's the manipulating word she used for me and I agreed for her pastor to officiate it, I agreed because if another ear should hear such word, It'd spread out and people might believe it's true.
As for she answering my surname, I have already promised myself not to confront her about it, because I expect her to do that immediately after our marriage. But until this very moment she's still answering her father's name.

Oga, you are allowing too many people in your ears. Which one is she is controlling you again? Isn't that expected of you both? Many a times, for couples, there's always that midpoint which to an outsider, it is natural to feel one is controlling the other. It is a loop hole you are putting in your home. You should learn to let things be settled between you both and when you need external advice, seek from people who have nothing to interest in either party otherwise, you will listen to lob sided advice.

BlindAngel:
We had an argument few weeks ago and she was crying as usual, she was still pregnant then. I told her that she's always using her tears to manipulate me and she swore with the life of the fetus on her womb that she isn't, since then I thought maybe she doesn't know when the tears start flowing and might not be manipulating me, but with what I saw yesterday after the argument, that thought is no longer there, I now fully believe that she's manipulating me with tears at every slight arguments or quarrels.

Regarding her changing her name, this is one thing I have swore never and ever to tell her to do, even though it hurts me to my bone marrow most especially seeing her elder sister on Facebook answering her boyfriend name. I swear that it hurts me so much that she is still answering her father's name but I won't ever confront her about this, common sense is supposed to tell her that immediately after marriage she's supposed to change her surname to my own name, even if it's just her Facebook name for the now. But no, she didn't, she registered for antinental with her surname, and that's why the money I paid for her CS has her name and surname on the receipt.

Uncle, there is courtship for a reason and that wasn't a time for frivolities in the name of love. It was a period to discuss all and everything and not leave things for assumption. At this point, you would need to apply wisdom to bring back those discussions that were missed. Most importantly, you need find an adequate middle ground for you both. You both need make sacrifices where necessary.

Oche211:
You still want her to have her way this last time. You are not ready for anything.

If it's me, I will simply tell her I have changed my mind. Let her tell her pastor not to come. That you have made arrangements with your own pastor.
No matter how she disagrees, don't back down. Also, call her father and explain to him and tell him to call both his daughter and their pastor to order.

Tell him your wife has become unreasonable and for all she's done, you aren't comfortable with their pastor coming for the naming.

This is a test to know the family you married into.
Just call her father and tell him to talk to his daughter. In all your discussion with him, insist on not seeing the said pastor in your house on that day.

Again, if it's possible, make sure you take your family far from the church. That's if you can't be firm with this decision

Did they force him to marry her or do you think he is doing her a favor marrying her? He needs thread with caution and as a man learn to lead his home and not just listen to people like you who want to make him feel he is more than he is.

BlindAngel:
This is what I intend doing, thanks for your advise, I will do as you advised as it's the absolutely best thing to do right now. Although I have already given in on letting her pastor officiate the naming because of her CS operation, for her cry not to affect her.

But after everything, she won't go to that church again and I swear to God that if she refused she will pack her load and go, after all the love isn't there and I'm not sexually attracted to her. Same tears she used in manipulating me in getting married to her is same tears she's still using in getting her way after every little misunderstanding. I will stop her from going to that church, I have had enough already.

I thought from the beginning you were a silly ass and now, you just showed it to the world. Grow up and smell the coffee and stop trying to make her the stupid and unreasonable one when you are not in any way different. If you like, break your home; interestingly, the cheer leaders on here have nothing to lose. The effrontery to type the bolded is alarming.

BlindAngel:
It seems I have been too easy and quiet on her, I will do as you say and ban her from going to that church and if she refused, she should pack her load and go back to her parents house, I have really condole enough of her rubbish and tears at any slight arguments.

I paid 396k for her cs operation, and no where my name or surname appeared on the receipt that was given to me, it's her name and her father's name that was on it. This is because after marriage she has not changed her surname to my name, this hurt me a lot because her elder sister that is just a baby mama to her boyfriend has already changed her Facebook sur name to her boyfriend surname. Whereas my wife is still answering her father's name, I have told myself that if she can't think and do this willingly, I will never and ever confront her concerning this.

I have been allowing her to do whatever she want but this, she has over stepped her boundaries, seems I have been too easy on her.

Don't let social media break your home ooo. There is need to apply wisdom in handling issues as this. You both failed not to reach conclusions while dating and you just need apply wisdom in handling this.

That said, why did you not ask your name be imprinted on the receipt when you made payment? DO NOT blame her for your insufficiencies abeg. On the change of name, what was discussed during courtship? Like they say, yours is a typical example of if love is blind, marriage is an eye opener.

My advice will be bring up the things you feel you want corrected and handle it with care. Gra gra wouldn't solve it and as much as you can, do not bring up the sister changing her name to the baby daddy's name as that is disrespectful and not your business in any way. Deal with your own family in the ways that is best understood by you and your wife.

Gr8mind07:
Bro,it's obvious you have been a victim of her manipulating tactics since courtship .

Whatever the background church of a lady, it is expected the she bids the church bye - bye at the wedding ceremony and follows her husband to his church. This is the reason that marriage is conducted in the lady's church and thanksgiving at the Man's church.

Even her so called Pastor knows this.

Not necessary. The man might choose to switch church to her church. The most important thing is they should have discussed this and reach a conclusion before the marriage.

BlindAngel:
That's the church she was attending before we got married, so I don't want to stop her in order for it not to seems like I'm wicked and for her not to call me names.
Yesterday she reminded me that after our marriage my family forced her to do thanks giving at our church. She has been saying this for long, but stopped, until yesterday.
I told her that doing thanks giving at our church is now a bad thing or something that's forceful?
She cried a lot yesterday because of our argument of this naming.
Same tears she used in forcing me into getting married to her when I wasn't in anyway ready.

Either find a neutral pastor for the sake of peace or do it by yourself. This shouldn't create any trouble in the home whatsoever.

Oga, on the authority part, rest ooo. There are ways to own the authority of the home than letting issues such as this get to you. You chose to be manipulated and this is not a case of challenging your authority. One question is what were you guys discussing during courtship?

You both have some growing up to do on the bolded. Why is your family dictating things in your home? This is a good time to settle the church thing otherwise, you should expect so much of unnecessary tantrums. My suggestion would be to move to a neutral church as it is obvious a logical conclusion wasn't reached before marriage.

Proponents of the Nigerian Corporal Punishment should be very happy with this. How would you raise a shovel to hit a living thing? That is extremely gross and the height of abuse.

Excellence100:
Please who paid SEVIS fee recently?

My people in the US are saying western Union is down and I'm wondering if that could happen for days...

Could it be that there is something they are not doing right?

Did you/they fill the coupon correctly? If yes, they can go into any store that does Western Union and make the payment. What the WU person needs is the coupon number and where the money is being sent to.

Frenchblood:
Oh cool, Without paying new MRV fee and SEVIS fee ?

You will pay a new MRV fee.

Wf007:
Not yet but i want to know it’s possible to do another interview after one month and half and get your visa approved because i think the consuler maybe suspicious that this one just wan japa anyone who can help me with tips please

People have done within a week in the past.

MMempire:
Festac is now an eye sore.

Generally as a people, we lack maintenance culture.

Good old days. Interesting how there was less division among the people. I grew up in Festac and everybody was friends with everybody.

Who determines the pay of the State House of Assembly members?

Wf007:
My profile …GTA with deficit of 6,595$
And yes am working at obafemi Awolowo university
Protein subunit research

Please can you gimme a piece of advice or tips because the school program will start by August 12th if I should buy another appointment date before then or what did you think 🤔
P
Help help

Have you tried requesting an expedited interview date?

Where are the youths and why do we need more states? Has the proliferation of states improved the welfare of the citizens better than the days of regional government?

Flixvevo:
Please,
can one create a new DS-160 profile after being given appointment date for interview ?

I mean will there be any issues doing that

GboyegaD mayford JMG12

Yes you can however, this must be linked to your portal not later than 72 hours before your interview.

Ajibade105:
I disagree with what you just said, I know someone recently whose B1 visa was canceled when the F1 was denied. The VO said this to the applicant by saying do you know you can't travel to the US with your B1/B2 anymore because it has been canceled.

The incident you reported here is an exception. Normally, you can have different visas on your passport depending on when you applied for each. The most important thing is when you come in as a student, you must ensure whenever you are returning to the US you come in on the F1 visa otherwise, you have to report to your DSO where they help do the necessary to change it from B1/B2 to F1 and you usually get very strong warning for that. There are many people who have held both a F1 and B1 visas together without any issues.

How do we think as Nigerians? Since when did government become gender based positions? If this is how the Western countries run government would they ever produce female presidents?

The entire government is filled with clowns. Truth is if things are done right, they do not need to ask that cement prices be reduced.

What has the treaty amounted to in 22 years? Why does he think this National Assembly has the balls to sue the Federal Government? Lastly, why is he hoping the judiciary would be fair in their judgment?