₦airaland Forum

OmoAlata1:
Does he have big dicck and fucck you well well? Because I am trying to understand why you are so daft at this your tender age. Quitting a job for a man that is not even your husband, his dicck must be really good. Please describe the dick and sex to me. I need a good dick that will turn me into mumu.

Just see another radical luv loading. It just pains me to her waste a treasure as her youth.

The problem here is you. You wont listen now to counsel. I am sure people have been warning you offline but you wont hear. Did i read you say you want to make it work. Continue to change a devil. You even take financial responsibility, tommorrow you come and complain he trapped you into marrying him and that he wakes you up for Tfare like radicaluv.

You are making unhealthy 'wifey' sacrifice for one who is not your husband. How many husband responsibility has he taken for you?

Go get thoroughly schooled on what an healthy relationship should be. Dont be over careful of your parent's.

Even if you get a job now, trust me, he ask you to resign, anything to keep him in control. It so sad that you are wasting your youth which is your highest chances of making it right in life. If you dont leave that destiny waster now you may realise you missed it again like the job offer.

I thought to give you some things to give thoughts. One thing that is good and common to you both is that the love is mutual; you both termed each other nice.

I believe part of the twixt in her thread is to make her anonymus to the public and you. Now you said it all as it is which shows you dont well understand each other, the distance not helping too and lack of objective communication. You said she is domineering, many first daughters are and it is worse if she is a choleric. She mentioned working on flaws, i want to believe they are the ones you mentioned.

I thought she was mature fully the way she kept repeating the word but you made me realise otherwise, i can see she is not in her thirties yet and her desperation could also be coming from her birth position, friends marrying. Btw, she said she kept quiting to keep you on your toes, let me add to test your love. It has been working until now. Highly immature but will grow her up as she will see you too have grown.

Has it occured to you that it could have been very frustrating for her when you choose to observe her changed attitude from a distance thesame time she wanted to be close to you to show you she is truly repenting. Her background may have made her poorly cope when your finances were down but she need to grow here too.

Anyways you have both seen the minds of each other now, something you could have communicated, i hope you take it up from here for good.

Timbuktuo:
Lol. People who live in one room apartments should not have sex. I done hear anada one today. If my wife denied me sex because of our financial situation, she better pray I never become rich in this life because i would take another wife the minute I hammer. God punish and her stinking pûssy. She dey crase.

Not neccessarily. Check his threads, it seems his only worries on earth is sex. I was only telling him to use some of the energy to hustle more and improve his living condition, perhaps the sex and other things will follow suit.

Come o Op, do you think of or do anything aside sex. All your issues are centered on sex. It appears it bothers you more than getting your family out of the one room apartment.

How do you expect her to continue as before in that space with kids? I advice you chanel the energy into money making hustle, get your family on track, then see if she will not make all the moves. I think your wife is indirectly telling you to double your hustle, she is confident your pocket cant get her a competition.

classc25:
Please my niece acts the same, that is hyperactive her speech is not clear and yes she tip toes and has a bit of cross eyes. Does it means any thing please . She is 7 years.

kingAfo what do you say about this?

theworldbest:
d little knowledge I have abt it is cold water intake may cause blood to clot.after delivery it's best you take hot water so you can heat up your stomach to enable the bad blood flow well n avoid cramps

The knowledge you have is the truth. Take cold water continually few days to your period and see the flow difficult or slow with more cramps due to the blood cloting from the coldness of the water. Then try same with mild or hot water, you will get the opposite effect.
Any woman who wants to disagree should first try this simple experiment with careful observation; not a man coming to write theory.

UjuJoan2:
Haba, so most likely no mother asked her to leave? Wow!

She's really a f00l!

I like the way you have been encouraging him to give her another chance and also with your experience, i dare say, with his experience too. Pls dont hang up on her yet because she seems a good soul.

She is a tool like you said and her fidgeting shows her mum/family is not behind her wanting to leave but also give slacks for the truth that she is young and naive. The guy giving her that money doesnt appear broke, she may have met him during her stay with OP especially with her past account balance.

As for her family wanting to come over, i think she made them feltl she is comfortable, accepted, welcome anytime and by extension her entire family. Given the Nigerian factor, any one not informed would likely do like her.

If she is sorry for her acts, she should please be given another chance. She should also be guilded by OP and his wife on relationships.

MrBottle:
Don't mind the ineffectual buffoon. To think that he is not elated that the WIFE is still breathing speaks a lot. A hot slap to hot wire his brain will go a long way.

It indeed says it all.

Mrbottle corked it. You say you were not emotionally abusive? I doubt that because a lot points you were. You mentioned repeatedly that you were angry at her, what choice of words did you use? and i believe its your usual angry choices.
You took a one year old from her mum to drink away the anger caused by her mum, yet you want to convince me you did not threatened her to her near death. How many other dads came with their one year olds? only you came to cool off?
What is even worse is that you have not shown any happiness of one who almost lost his wife but anger still from her 'disrespect and unfaithfulness'. Any man in your shoe who loves his wife would have only remembered the rent after the wife is stable and be scared to leave her alone to go to work.

When you started the story, you sounded like it is the money or life will end, only for me to see that you still have a little job. Again i imagined how you sounded to her. Oga check how you express your anger to her or you might not be lucky next time.

a

Do not exploit the poor because they are poor and do not crush the needy in court, for the lord will take up their case and will plunder those who plunder them.

Do not make friends with a hot-tempered man,
do not associate with one easily angered, or you may learn his ways and get yourself ensnared.

You may need do with Hepatitis test as well. Not as talked about as HIV but can be deadlier. It has symptons like flu, dissapear and reappear with malaria treatment pattern whilst latently killing.

Gentlejay:
least i forget to add,i ve stopped working, even d mum he spent mney on died anoda mney spent for burial, baby stuff here and there,sisters schfees on his head too...i wud really want to start working now,but my baby is still young n i cant even tink of any kind of job i can do now with her even when shes 6mnth..(pls need ideas on that) am really confused...dis apartment rent will xpire nxtyr feb...my parents are really understanding and trying to help but i just hate d fact everyone knws me very well unlike him but still its my dad compound and i dnt tink its really cool.......sorry for any grammatical error..was typing fast

How often do your siblings use the duplex?
Were your siblings part of the people talking when you were at the duplex?
Because i am thinking the duplex would be more private for you and with the way you are, if the tenants starts their own gossip, you will assume what they said and didnt say, then you be thinking of another escape. Besides, the old devils knows the gist which will soon/must stale. Is adding or trying new devils worth it? I mean which of the devils can you confidently face and have peace?

There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan that can succeed against the Lord.

If a man shuts his ears to the cry of the poor, he too will cry and not be answered.

He who is kind to the poor lends to the lord, and he will reward him for what he has done.

To have a fool for a son brings grief; there is no joy for the father of a fool.

A foolish son brings grieve to his father and bitterness to the one who bore him.

What you have seen with your eyes do not bring hastily to court, for what will you do in the end if your neighbour puts you to shame?

He who increases his wealth by exorbitant interest amasses it for another, who will be kind to the poor.

Do not revile the king in your thoughts,
or curse the rich in your bedroom,
because a bird of the air may carry your words and a bird on the wing may report what you say.

Whoever digs a pit may fall into it; whoever breaks through a wall may be bitten by snakes.
Whoever quarries stones may be injured by them; whoever splits log may be endangered by them.

The quiet words of the wise are more to be heeded than the shouts of a ruler of fools.

Wisdom is better than weapons of war, but one sinner destroys much good.

Oftentimes we get to hear or see societal proverbs in english or pidgin english but this is about biblical proverbs.

The matter was concluded before it began;

Not only was the Teacher wise, but also imparted knowledge to the people. He pondered and searched out and set in order many proverbs.
The Teacher searched to find just the right words, and what he wrote was upright and true.

The words of the wise are like goads, their collected sayings like firmly embedded nails-given by one shepherd.
Be warned, my son, of anything in addition to them.

Now all has been heard;
here is the conclusion of the matter: fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the whole duty of man.

J

Interesting discourse and very enlightening too. But I have a few questions...using a bit of @sassyangel's dad's story as an example (hope I have your permission?)..

1) is it possible that if he was married to someone else living within a different reality, it may have ended differently ?

2) hope we are not confusing resignation with happiness? I'm not saying that's the case here but in similar scenarios, when people accept that "it's their cross" and trudge along while outsiders look and say "Oh that's a trooper" ... it may be a case of resignation and not love.

3) not all love stories end idyllically. I think that's another ideal that society foists on people. Are we seriously implying that there are no divorced/ remarried happy individuals or couples? I suspect that a few of them are probably just peeping at this thread and laughing to themselves.

4) why do people frown so hard at divorced people -
A bit harder on women I admit (especially in Nigerian/ African societies)? Surprisingly, this includes religious institutions (i.e. the church). It almost sounds like the unforgivable sin. Not by God but by men. Are we implying that if one gets into a wrong marriage by error or wilfully then he/she is trapped except the right conditions are met? (E.g. adultery, death etc)

5) (please permit me to refer to the Bible) Proverbs 6:16-19 also states things that God hates but we isolate divorce and treat it specially. I understand that a vow was made. Does breaking a vow made with God mean that other vows can't be fulfilled? Does that automatically make a divorcee a bad person that can never be trusted? Or there's a special place in hell reserved for them? Lol... or is this a case of people judging others that have fallen short of the glory of God, while we remain without sin?

Please I sincerely hope that we can discuss this with maturity and not resort to mudslinging and subtle jabs. Thanks once again to everyone that has shared his/her perspectives and helped others to shape their thoughts/lives con

Its sad, selfish, but no point blaming you further than you are going through, also because you set out with a seemingly good intention(pity) but was plain ignorance. The zest to prove you were man enough, wmelancholic taking charge; where you that young?
You are very right, it was the only picture, objective you took into and brought out of the marriage.

That was a gory experience you both went through. I plead you to get her introspections, she might not easily yield but friendly persist and ins:/ist. If you get this right, you May be her friend and hero for life as well as give your kids (at whose expense you both selfishly decided) the best despite being separated. She was selfish to accept what she can't give. Trust me, you didn't know but she knew you might not reach the finish line. still I don't think she is altogether indifferent as you think, she just may not be expressing the emotions the way you are used to. It could somewhat be mutual.

Let me give my say on your latest introspections; at the centre of them all, i saw only one thing-SEX.
1. You promised what you couldnt deliver because you knew you(your person) could go almost any length for a friend and much more for a wife but you didnt know you cant sacrifice certain things for even saving your life because they are your life or make you, so what's the point sacrificing. You would understand better if for instance you are asked to give up your nerd self for something opposite.
2. When you are in love it is quite difficult to recieve a wisdom/full knowledge you do not have the common sense/basic knowledge for unless you want to follow blindly or as a child which means the love and trust for the wisdom source more than the one you fell into.
3. Yes it is good to be a bit selfish if you see it that way, everyone is at some point but No, not selfishness if you see it this way; that you cant sacrifice your nerd nature for anything because that's you, your core.
4. It will only take maturity in varying degree to continously be interested in, give happiness to one who doesnt reciprocate and such maturity usually dont come before a first experience.
5. Dont shade the faith yet. What you would have done for one with your exposed level was to have been adequately informed, aware of your body from the urges, thoughts and reactions to sex, sex-ducations etc before marriage.
Know yourself well so you dont take again what will make you not feel you. You may need look critically at the things you can't take lest you think they will complement you like the other aspects of her.
6. Were you already frustrated at the lack of sex? cost it took to make baby? so much saw baby as consolation? Ignorance? That you couldnt bring yourself to mourn with and comfort each other, give more light.

If you know only the good sides of a person, you are yet to verily know that person and its more risky if you knew this sides with the person's consent either by word of mouth or consciousness from the person.
All your fears boils down to the person in question not all 22yrs old, the more reason you should know this girl and stop being carried away by her pluses.
Do you know her bad sides, can you live with them?
Does she know yours and can she cope with them?
Give it time and get to know this girl first and well aside this your clouded head.

The 6 arms and 2 legs make up the 8 tentacles. Previously it was thought to be 8 arms, the discovery you meant are for arms and legs not tentacles. Some even argue it doesnt have tentacles but arms(legs).

Hi gee, what xup with your boss' hotel recruitment?
Have they done interview?

Eeh oni Zino, i greet you and your government too, thanks.

ahnie:
Greetingz