₦airaland Forum

PastorOlokonla:
There is this case involving a a brother at a popular Pentecostal church, this brother was disciplined and suspended in the chuch, his crime was that he visited a lady alone at her home which was contrary to the church doctrine.

Now this man and the lady in question just completed a traditional wedding and bride price was paid the previous weekend.

The reason for the suspension being that the couple were yet to do the "white weedding" so technically, according to the church were not yet fully married after the trado.

My argument at the time was that, once a ceremony had been performed and the bride's parents had received the bride price, handed the lady over to the man, they are fully married and any other church wedding or ceremony should be regarded as mere formalities.

What do you think? Is the church justified in suspending the brother?

What about our parents who had no "white wedding", are we saying they are not fully married if we decide to side with the church?

White wedding is not our culture and it is deeply rooted in paganism. A couple becomes officially married once bride price has been paid.

ravensckar:
That's why I always laugh at people who see house as a solid investment.

By the time you calculate what you spent on it and the returns, you'll realize that the MATHEMATICS isn't "MATHING" ENOUGH.

Nonetheless, anyone who can afford it should build to avoid landlord wahala.

...Not forgetting that it is a longterm investment and in most cases, before the initial capital is realised, the property would have been damaged, requiring renovation.

Henry2405:
I met a woman from one of the popular market in ibadan she was complaining of an inability to browse on WhatsApp and I assisted her. We exchanged numbers and we started chating, I got to know that she was lonely because her husband was on a peace keeping mission in one of the African countries.

The total sex I had with this woman summed up is more than the sex I have had with my wife. She got pregnant and had a baby boy that I know vividly that is my son though she tactically pushed the pregnancy to her military husband that was around at that time.

We both agreed not to talk about the boy but several years past she called me to tell me that she has given her life to Christ and she plans to confess to her husband about the five years old boy.

Kindly advise me on the necessary steps to follow.

You didn't seek counsel before running a reckless maneuver with a married woman. Why should our counsel matter now? Actions beget consequences. If you can commit then you must remit.

Kingsempires:
Alexander the Great was the emperor of macedonia and also the greatest ruler in the 4th BCE.For the 12 years of his reign his did'nt loss a single war.before his early dead. Julius caesar was the founder of the roman empire that lasted for many centuries ,he was the inventor of calendar.he conquered many places in europe before his assination on mar 44 BCE.AS for those that studied history very well who do you think that is the greatest among this two person i called their name here?

Both leaders were great in their own way and style. Comparing with the aim of picking out the best would be hard until if you pen down the criteria to use. All I can add though is that Caesar played a major role in shaping the Roman empire.

Westchester:
Who do you think is at fault here

This is possibly staged. Courtesy demands that when you ask a lady out on a date, you foot the bills. If you are also not very buoyant, you take her to a restaurant that you can well afford.

[quote author=AngelSlay post=131398056][/quote]Stop being negative. You will be called.

Mummyfour:
yes. He makes videos too on Facebook. He said he used to fix nails then at Wuse market before he became what he was .

May his soul find peace.

lexy2014:
how is he a sensation by dressing like a woman?

I think the community who made him one is in a better position to answer this question.

Tokskob2008:
Too expensive. N100k goat will be much more than this in quantity and sweetness too.

Here in the North, with 100k, you would get 2 fairly sized for that price.

JaneYave:
Will the catfish stay in the stomach forever? If the answer is No, then the cost is over stated

...Only then would it be worth that price.

ERockson:
It doesn't worth 50k

Exactly. I would get more value from a 20k worth of Catfish than this.

Agbo19:
Yes u right

This is really sad. May his soul find peace.

Agbo19:
A dead body was seen this morning in Abuja around white house close to banex.

This is brutal. Looks like a tik tok sensation called area mama

Apparently, every Nigerian is a civil servant. Who advises this man?

Talismann:
when you finish all that, when you get children no buy pampers, use banana leaves, don't buy formula, give them garri, don't buy baby clothes, tie them wrapper, don't rent a bigger house, stay for self con with all the children, finally no take Dem go school, teach them your self for inside house.

You can't escape, the only way is to double or triple your hustle. As the naira loses value, you just gotta make more of it

I don't know how best to reply you. If you were thinking, you would have noticed I focused solely on the marriage ceremony solely. Instead of dropping all these innuendos, you simply should have asked me how couples can navigate life after the ceremony. Drink some water and stop sounding aggressive.

RuddyFusion:
I'm planning to resign from my full time role tomorrow Monday 5th of August....

This role pays me #300k net alongside data and other few allowances. But over the last couple of months more stuffs have been dump on my table without adequate compensation...

I have tried to have a conversation with the management to further review my take home to match the additional responsibilities but it's failing on deaf ears with no commitment to my request all I get is more work...

I have delayed this to accommodate the fears of friends and family but I do have another hustle that pays me in dollars that actually meets my needs so I'm thinking of leaving this Naira one to focus on that one and use my extra time to prepare for something better......

My resignation letter is ready and I will drop it after our weekly meeting tomorrow morning except a divine intervention stops me....

So my people do you have any words for me? I will that if any......

I know this may sound silly, but please do not resign. Is this job affecting your productivity on the other one? If no, please manage both jobs. The economy isn't smiling too well on employers. Moreso, having two sources supercedes one. You can set a two year target, save up all the funds from this job and invest the saved money or set up a business that aligns with your skills.

jaszplus12:
Plug all holes around you too....they love to take rent-free accomodation in holes!

You are right.

samwash:
Always fumigate your compound & around your environment every now and then, snakes wouldn't have business coming close to your compound.

There are species of snakes that can withstand fumigation. I think the best thing to do is to make the space unsuitable for the snakes. Clear all grasses, plant snake-repelling plants around and so on.

We4all:
Although, we are no longer in the same neighbourhood, I still see her occassionally. But trust me, I don't like interracting with her because her character puts me off and rubs on me negatively. How can a little girl be looking so sad and withdrawn? Ironically, her siblings are very lively, so I don't where she got that attitude from.

Hmmmm! Something is definitely wrong. I understand your stance on not wanting to pry. Whatever it is, I pray she outgrows it. In your own little way, try to put a smile on her face. You never call tell how much difference your acts of kindness can make.

We4all:
That encounter happened a couple of years ago. I am not so close to her parents though, and even if I were to raise the issue, they wouldn't see it as a big deal.

Pardon me for not checking the date. Are you still in the same neighbourhood. How is her temperament like, now?

[quote author=Domainer1999 post=131303149][/quote]The economic crunch is crunching hard, reducing the chances of marriage among intending couples. Realistically speaking, if a couple must get married in this economy, especially if they are looking to cut cost, then alot of practices have to be jettisoned. What is important is not the wedding ceremony but the blessings from the pastor/imam. Thus. Throwing an elaborate ceremony should be delisted. The white wedding is not even our culture to start with. So why spend so much on that. Perform all traditional rites with members of both families present, have a pastor bless the couple afterwards, exchange marital vows and it is a sealed deal.

Cooolme:
Greetings Nairalanders...
I will be 20 by year ending and I just discovered my Bp is high, this is very shocking to me. Was sick some days ago and I went for a complete checkup that's how i found out, although that wasn't the cause of my illness. I Don't exercise anymore but I'm not fat and I think my paternal family has this hypertension history that affected my father. Can these factors be the cause I'm experiencing this?

Relax your head and worry less. A little lifestyle adjustment could help. If drugs were prescribed, please take them religiously. Eat clean, avoid salt bouillon cubes, processed sugar, fatty food, bread and junks generally. All will be well!

We4all:
I'm someone who gets along great with kids, (especially those in my former neighborhood). There is this particular family whose kids always come around, and they have a 2 year old who happens to be one of my favourites.

When she is around with her older siblings, I play with her and she lets me hold her. In fact, we get along great! Last week, they were at my place, and her older sibling volunteered to run an errand for me. The 2 year old wanted to go with her, but I objected.

That was my undoing! As soon as the sister stepped out, the kid became furious with me, and wouldn't let me touch her. When I tried, she kept screaming that I should leave her alone. I held her hands and tried talking to her, but she wriggled out of my grip. I must confess that I was amazed at her strength, which was like a 10 year old.

Hours passed, and I thought her anger had died. I made an attempt to touch her, but she kept screaming: "Leave me alone". They eventually left and I forgot about it.

A week passed and they came by yesterday, but to my greatest shock, she was still mad at me. All my efforts to bond with her was met with a stiff resistance, and she kept saying: " Leave me alone". I asked the sister what she thinks of her behavior, and she said the kid gets angry easily at home and her anger can last for days.

That revelation didn't go down well with me, and I have been pondering what on earth would make a kid act that way? Gone are those days when kids are usually sweet and innocent. No matter how much you discipline them, they still warm up to you.

I guess a lot is going on and the change has also affected our kids. If a little kid is overly sensitive in her ways, then what should be expected of an adult?

At first, I was intrigued by your submission. I teach children and I understand that they can be naughty. What I do not understand however,is a child holding on to a grudge for days. It is not healthy. It points to either childhood trauma or early signs of aggression/hot temper. How well do you connect with this child's parents? Raise this observation with them.

Afodot0022:
Good day my lovely people, it always good to share life with you people here. Pls I need to ask, what is the advantage and disadvantage of living together with your girlfriend under the same roof. My girlfriend had an accommodations problem, her friend they stay together kick her out for no just reason, she wanted to get an apartment and the money she was ask to bring was quite much 250k, I convinced her to come stay with me and save that money for other things, initially she opposed but later agreed to come stay.
My reasons for her staying are there..
1... I want to get to know her better cos I believe when you live with someone in the same space, that's when you get to know them better, I was once married and have learnt a lot on how ladies pretend in dating but show their true color in marriage, atleast I want to know her well before making another serious commitment of marriage.
2... She works and earn a decent salary which I think will be an added advantage for me by her supporting by we both sharing bills together, it will lessen by burden. Though I haven't discussed this with her yet but hope to soon cos I can't let her depend solely one me while she works.
3.... Ever since I separated from my wife, it's not been easy living alone as a man, the cooking ,washing ,cleaning and loneliness has not been easy, so we living together will atleast help me in these area.
To be candid, the girl is a good girl and I was the one that disvirgin her, she is submissive and respect me, but you know you can really say of a person character until you live with them.

Now my question is to those that have been in this situation of living together with a girlfriend you are yet to marry, how did this affect the relationship afterwards. Pls share your experience be it negative or positive, I really want to learn from others to see if I can proceed on this or just abort mission by not allowing her to stay any longer. Do you think it make sense I share bills with her or I should should all financial responsibility even though am not capable of that now.. pls help me to navigate this scenario

A couple cohabiting offers a number of benefit. One of such benefit is the fact that you you get to understand your partner better. If he or she is faking initially, cohabiting would bring to light their schemes. It is also a useful tool is testing compatibility, especially if this period is invested in thoughtful discourse and not just coitus.

However, I would strongly proscribe to this. A wise man once posited that if you can milk the cow for free, you may not see the need in buying the cow. Same analogy can be applied here. Cohabiting with your partner may delay the process of marriage. The man, most especially, may not see the need in doing the needful. If care is not taken, the process of being a baby mama/baby papa may be initialized further putting the couple in a state of rigmarole.

If I had a say, I would prescribe that she puts up with you for the time being, but with house hunting in view. She works and earns well, thus she can be able spare some cash for rent.

I am also bothered about the needs you highlighted. I'm talking about the cooking, cleaning et al. Is that why you want her around or you truly seek genuine companionship. Are you with this lady because of the potential benefits you stand to gain from her. Are you a user? Are you trying to milk the cow without acquiring it? If you so much desire companionship and she is a good woman, why not start off the marriage process?


All the best!

pingpong1:
Not sure it leaked per se. What I know is that it is normally given to the press in advance and clearly marked NOT TO BE BROADCAST BEDORE 7AM 4TH AUGUST 2024. Trust Sahara Reporters not to comply.

You are right, but the submission is not intended to be made public until the speech has been delivered. So tagging it a leaked document is not far from the truth.

Pacesetter123:
Ask him.Even if a woman is working and earning money legally, will she use her money to go and marry a man for herself?

Exactly!

numericalguy:
Since when has it been a taboo for women to also work and earn money legally

Is that the bone of contention here?


Assuming it just so happens to be the topic of discourse, don't you know that man is generic. That is, it is used to refer to both male and female? Thus what I have up there cuts across both gender.

numericalguy:
Since when has it been a taboo for women to also work and earn money legally

Is that the bone of contention here?

MrCork:
U sound like wifey material...u muss be half cast or lightskin¡!

Halfcast- No!

jaszplus12:
Sincerely I don't agree with you on this. Give him another chance? No please.
He doesn't deserve the woman, he should live by himself and never bother any decent female. These guys are never repentant, I've a case currently with about the same situation and the hell the lady is going through breaks my heart!
Please marriage should never be a war zone or a ground zero!
Second chances can be given when there are no extreme cases of strife!!

You are equally right in your own sphere and I can't help but to agree more. Cheers!

RoyalBlu:
.

You got it!

RoyalBlu:
I'm not disputing the fact you just stated.

What she wrote on her placard literally means she's been looking for a husband for a long while now due to bad governance.

That's a bit of a stretch. Don't you think so?

I honestly didn't see it from that light. You may be right. Pota(y)to Pota(h)to