₦airaland Forum

[color=#000030]Should i call this OP a Fool or an Idi[i]o[/i]t? I'm discombobulated! [/color]

[color=#000030]Marital disunity is when your husband takes some of the kids and heads to anglican, while you pick some of the kids and head to pentecostal. You both get to your respective churches and you see married couples sitting together. Dont you wonder what the hell is wrong with you both? And you claim you love each other? What kind of nonsense love is that? May thunder fire such love, and dislocate it. . . Amen![/color]

[color=#000030]^^^
I dont need a car to hit me before i know i could get injured. . . You CANT love 2 humans equally. Choose the one that completes you more.[/color]

Damalex4luv:
For your information relationship is relationship whether it's in love or not.

[color=#000030]I dont know who is more st[i]u[/i]pid. . . The OP, or the Idiots Singing his praise. . . #Dilemma Help pls!
[/color]

[color=#000030]^^^
You are not ready to let her go. A part of you likes the sex, and only the sex. When you are ready, no one will show you how to let her go. You nack your way enter trouble, na me go come nack the trouble comot? Na wa you o. . .[/color]

[color=#000030]^^^
Fight ke? Nah! I've stopped fighting. I'm now a born again! [/color]

[color=#000030]Bullshit! I guess you love all the ashis you been sleeping with huh? "Dumboleen"[/color]

[color=#000030]Pitiably lame! The jokes section is now "Kindergatenish". . . Smh![/color]

born2fuck:
I have been watching and noticing killz, he is a woman wrapper, another true talk i most confess tonight before he blow his yeye grammer,he always support the girls,maybe he hasn't see kitty before or they have cooked food for him with kitty's water,

[color=#000030]And this is all you could come up with? Now read your moronic post again, and tell me why you should not be referred to as an Inarticulate discombobulated nincompoop. . . Just tell me why!
[/color]

[color=#000030]MBJ why are you Hyperventilating? Abeg this thread is a joke, and it's in the Jokes Section. . . So just LOL! [/color]

pendo89:
This is the one question all virgins that get burnt ask. Stop carrying too much guilt guy cz the girl will come around!! Jeez the stress of disvirgining somebody!
Your girl is going through a phase of guilt and anger cz she idolises virginity just like many girls do since its a pre requisite to marriage. (there)
But reality has hit her! ITS GONE kaput! she will never be a virgin again and if you don't end up as her hubby she has trouble wondering what she's gonna tell the guy that will end up marrying her ie if he cherishes a virgin.
Please when she calls show her some love.Tell her you didn't plan to do so but she was just irresistable!! praise her a bit so she stops feeling 'taken advantage of'' I wish u could tell her that you enjoyed it and you don't mind doing it again if she permits you to. That also means its not the end of the relationship.Shes probably worried that you are going to drop her now that you have gone all the way and there's nothing new to explore. No mystery awaits!

Look here dude ,she's picking ur call that is a good sign.Let her release her anger on u.It's ok and for a while. Keep uttering I love you all the time she wishes you dead and don't waste too much time explaining why and talking like you regret cz it only worsens the situation.She is a woman now not just a girl so let her know you are proud of introducing her to womanhood.
The poor girl is fighting her own demons.Give her time!

You know you are both annoying in this sense.You played with something u knew was dangerous and ignored the warning signs.
So lets say it's a good lesson to those  virgins who keep playing with that weapon of mass destruction and crying foul later.

[color=#000030]Nice compendium. . . Get a blog! [/color]

[color=#000030]Do these kind of men occur in nature? Or should we just answer imaginative questions, since there are no other threads?[/color]

Idowuogbo:
[b]Tbh I only wear matching [size=16pt]Nylon undies[/size],in return he also only wears [size=16pt]polythene boxers[/size] by armani.[/b]So yes we environmentally friendly its cool to go green.

Anoda attention seeking thread msteeeeew!

[color=#000030]Dies On Arrival! [/color]

tellwisdom:
To God almighty, These gurls arent goodlooking. Check them from head to toe. #[size=16pt]Eye sow[/size]

If they arent as big as YOKOZUNA. You find them as tiny as Letter " I". Some  are with bad legs, BAD SHAPE, but put up facial looks up on their profile, to deceive men. While some dirty ones are busy struggling to join the [size=16pt]leaugue[/size] .

Dont doubt my fact

[color=#000030]It's Eye Sore and league. . . "Dumboleen" [/color]

[color=#000030]Tom is in deep thoughts is sitting calm, very quiet.

Jerry his best friend asks, "What is wrong with you, Tom?"

Tom: "Please don't ask."  

Jerry: "I am your childhood friend. Talk to me."

Tom: "My seven year old son made my secretary pregnant."  

Jerry: "That's not possible."

Tom: "No, he did it."

Jerry "How's that possible?"

Tom: "He punctured my condoms!" [/color]

[color=#000030] The penis experiment

Jack goes to the doctor and says "Doc, I'm having trouble getting my penis erect, can you help me?"  


After a complete examination the doctor tells Jack, "Well, the problem is that the muscles around the base of your penis are damaged. There's really nothing I can do for you unless you're willing to try an experimental treatment."

Jack asks sadly, "And that would be?"

"Well," the Doctor explains, "what we would do is take the muscles from the trunk of a baby elephant and implant them in your penis."

Jack thinks about it silently then says, "Well the thought of going through life without ever havi[i]n[/i]g sex again is too much, let's go for it."

Jack went under the knife, and, after a period of recovery and healing, returned to the Doc for his blessing. Following the examination, the Doc pronounced Jack, "Healed and ready for action."

Eager to use his experimentally enhanced equipment, Jack planned a romantic evening for his girlfriend and took her to one of the nicest restaurants in town, anticipating a happy conclusion to the evening.

In the middle of dinner he felt a stirring between his legs that continued to the point of being painful.

To release the pressure, Jack placed his napkin on his lap and unzipped his fly. His penis immediately sprung from his pants, flipped the napkin on the floor, went to the top of the table, grabbed a bread roll and then returned to his pants!  

His girlfriend was stunned at first but then, imagining the possibilities, said with a sly smile and a gleam in her eye, "That was incredible! Can you do it again?"

Jack groaned, "Probably, but I don't think I can fit another roll in my assss."[/color]

[color=#000030]Once a man goes to the zoo, he sees that all the animals in the zoo were laughing only the donkey does not laugh. . .

So on the other day when he again comes to the zoo, he saw that the donkey was laughing and all the other animals were not, and when he asked one of the animals, he replied that "we told a joke the other day, and he understood the joke today.[/color]

[color=#000030]What a women says and man hears!

What a woman says. . .

This place is a mess! C'mon!
You and I need to clean up!
Your stuff is lying on the floor and
You'll have no clothes to wear if we
don't do laundry right now!

What a man hears,

blah blah blah blah blah C'MON!
YOU AND I blah blah blah blah!
blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR blah
blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah
blah blah blah RIGHT NOW! [/color]

ARareGem:
Very fine, Dr. Killz. Hope the same applies to you.

[color=#000030]Yeah it does. . . Aggravated by the fact that you are healed of Amnesia! Never been better![/color]

[color=#000030]Divorce Couple

A newly wed couple went to their lawyer to get themselves a divorce, 

The lawyer wondered dat why do they want a divorce wen they are both good looking & newly wed,  So he took both of them in 2 separate rooms & asked them the reason for the divorce, 

1st with the man, 
"I wanted this[b] ()[/b] , at least this ( ) ,  but what is this (    ) "  

, then with the woman, 
"I wanted this[b] =========>[/b] , at least this =====> , but what is this[b] ==>[/b]  

[/color]

[color=#000030]A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine year old son in the closet. One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet, as well.


Inside the closet, the little boy says, "It's dark in her, isn't it?" "Yes, it is," the man replies. "You wanna buy a baseball?" the little boy asks. "No thanks," the man replies. "I think you do want to buy a baseball," the little extortionist continues.

"OK. How much?" the man replies after considering the position he is. "Twenty-five dollars," the little boy replies. "TWENTY-FIVE DOLLRS?!" the man repeats incredulously, but complies to protect his hidden position.

The following week, the lover is visiting the woman again when she hears a car in the driveway and, again, places her lover in the closet with her little boy. "It's dark in her, isn't it?" the boy starts off. "Yes it is," replies the man. "Wanna buy a baseball glove?" the little boy asks. "OK. How much" the hiding lover responds, acknowledging his disadvantage. "Fifty dollars," the boy replies and the transaction is completed.

The next weekend, the little boy's father says "Hey, son. Go get your ball and glove and we'll play some catch." "I can't. I sold them" replies the little boy.

"How much did you get for them?" asks the father, expecting to her the profit in terms of lizards ad candy. "Seventy-five dollars," the little boy says. "SEVETY-FIVE DOLLARS?!

That's thievery! I'm taking you to the church right now. You must confess your sin and ask for forgiveness", the father explains as he hauls the child away. At the church, the little boy goes into the confessional, draws the curtain, sits down, and says "It's dark in here, isn't it?" "Don't you start that in here," the priest says.[/color]

[color=#000030]A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"


She responded by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone at the bar is now staring at them. Naturally the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and slink back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes.

She smiles at him and says, I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations." To which the man responds at the top of his lungs, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN 200 DOLLARS?" [/color]

[color=#000030]^^^
How are you my Rare Amnesiac wife? [/color]