mcdokwe:
Op, it is not like I'm judging you o,

Instead of looking for love in a package, why not reunite the child with her dad, that's with the assumption he would love her and take care of her, then go and search for your love. As much as we pretend to be liberal, Nigerian men as still very much traditional and conservative. Eight in ten men who welcome single mothers' children in their new relationships are mostly those in search of children or too old to get other young girls they may want to marry, it is only the other too who connect to the beautiful souls of those mothers, I pray you have such a soul and your mate connects you.

Forget all that I wrote up there, my main concern is with the child and her having a relationship with her dad.

Because,
Just like you, the mother of my child held on to her, denying me a place in her life.

Just like you, she is 29.
Just like your child, my daughter is six.
And here I am, wanting to love and care for my child, and maybe she's out there hoping for someone who would love my own child, the love I am not even allowed to give her and I am wondering who would love my child as much as I do.

what a coincidence...


A lady will only do what the mother of your child is doing if you parted with her in bad terms(you didn't marry her). Nothing hurts a lady like that,they will feel you have messed up their lives by putting them in a place where few men will consider committing to them,a place of ridicule and judgement,while you move on with your life freely and will never face ridicule like them.
They begin to resent you for it.

I always advice guys who impregnate girls to tell her to keep the baby IF and only IF:
1)They will marry them
2)If the girl will be emotional stable to move on with her life with no grudges if you don't marry her.
There is no need to have both the mother of your child and your child(who will be fed bad information about you) to hate you .

I have gotten three women pregnant, two were just flings and the other was /is the love of my life.

I told the first one when she gave me the news that I am very happy to become a dad(I really was,I love babies a lot). I will take full responsibility after a DNA test confirm its mine,but I will not marry her and our relationship of
just going on dates, sex etc will not change . I will not going to become more committed.

After much thinking,she opted for abortion because she was scared no one else will marry her as a SM. I was hurt,but I insisting she kept it would have been selfish for me.

Another mistake happened years later. Her family called me to pay dowry,I refused. Marrying a lady I don't love will be torture to her. I opted for full financial responsibility, infact the kid will come reside in the states with me but they refused. Her grandma travelled to the city with some local herbs she was taking till the baby was flushed out.

The last one,I already had the intentions of proposing before she took in. We have no regrets till date.

Needless to say,having a child with a woman emotionally invested in you but you will not marry will likely end up in tears because if you buy the world for her,take full financial responsibility for both her and the child,she will still resent you for not putting the ring.

CAPSLOCKED:
SO A COUNTER? IT'S NOT WORTH IT FELLAS.

the energy this males invest in females here eh...you had to create a thread because of the ranting of a single and not smart lady

I didn't even find the thread worthy of my comment when I saw the moniker talk more of countering it

ibkayee:
This is common with the ones with fragile egos, and we know that's a good portion of them

I don't think they hate it per se, I think they just prefer it to be regulated in a way that doesn't threaten them

funny enough guys are attracted to ladies with self esteem (not narcissistic or loqacious ladies ,there is a difference)
Men love ladies that say NO to some of their demands. I ask you to come over and it is past 9pm and you tell me "No!I don't go out late"
Or a lady that picks up her things to walk away when we cheat. Or a lady that tell us before seeing her pants we should put a ring on it.or a lady that refuses to be a side chick or booty call. Or a lady that insists we reduce contact with our exes.
These scenarios comes from a place of healthy self esteem.
Self esteem is loving yourself and knowing your worth and what you deserve. It reflect on how you treat others,you can only give out what you have. When you see yourself in the positive light you will see others that way,when you believe you deserve the best you will believe others deserve it to.


The thing is anybody can start acting arrogantly, running their mouths and acting anyhow all in the name of self esteem ,which is not.

Plead:


Another bullshît.

just shut up already...


You are an illiterate

MrBrownJay1:


the important question is: why ANYONE in a r/ship should go on dates with people who want to date them?! isnt that a waste of time since you are already in a r/ship?... and if that other person wants to go on a date with them to be friendly and get to know them (like a colleague etc), then you the BF/GF of that said person should come along then...

you see here naija girls reason?
After they will be opening wailing threads appealing to us to treat women right

Any sane person that takes reno omokri and FFK SERIOUS is depraved

sunnyeinstein:


Loool. Funny enough I only just heard of seretide this weekend. Kindly tell me more!
But we should know that 70-90% are stuck with ventolin, and it does fail at some point. So the risk is there, and covid will only expose us to more discrimination due to the similar symptoms

Yea...
Salbutamol doesn't always work when administered at the critical stage.

When I start wheezing or feeling mild tightness of chest, I take it but when it has reached the stage of me gasping for breath no ventolin inhaler,nebulizer or tablets works for me. Aminophyline intravenous injections works well at such stage or hydrocortisone injection.

Seretide is for managing it and reducing the frequency, its not what you use to treat it when it comes but daily taking to reduce its occurrence...
Before I develop symptoms one or twice a week but now I can go three to four months without asthmatic symptoms because of it.
It is made up of Fluticasone/salmeterol. You inhale it.

pansophist:

The nairaland's resident feminists are probably based abroad, or at least middle class in Nigeria with time and comfort. .

WTF...the street urchins on nairaland are who you call feminists? Aside pocco who is not even a feminist but believe in fairness, and few others. How many
NL ladies have money??

As in eh,It is very early that is why those pitiful men have not flooded this thread with blame,shaming etc all in the name of advice

IhateThemMods:


It all started when women thought they could a thing and get away with it.

actually feminism was needed at some point,else ladies will not be educated,men will get away with rape,they will not even have access to the internet...
A revolution was needed. But not this type as we know that is not focused on elevating the girl child but making comparisons with men and dragging over petty things instead of big issues.
How many feminists have campaigned for the release of Leah shiruba or chibok girls?

Last year in Nigeria,I was at an eatery. I asked the waitress if she was in the university (I am fond of asking girls if they are in school). She said she scored 243 in Jamb,got admission in Abia State university but the father refused to pay the acceptance fee. His reasons?he can't pay that jumbo sum for a girl since she will end up in a man's home as a house wife so she had to source for funds by working.

How many feminists will take this up?their own is just to argue online about packing of their husband plates.
Modern feminism is a joke

pansophist:


Never use Twitter before. Though, I'll consider that option. Can you post a link to TwitterNG please ?

the earlier this ladies realise that they are shooting themselves on the foot with the man hating feminism peddled now(I am not referring to genuine elevation of the girl child which I support) the better.

Here is a statement of regret from a former modern feminist:

Feminism freed men, not women. Now men are spared the nuisance of a wife and family to support. After childbirth, if his wife's waist doesn't return to 20 inches, the husband can go out and get a more petite woman. It's far more difficult for the wife, now tied down with a baby, to find a new man. My blind date that Friday waved goodbye as he drove off in his RV. I walked home and paid the sitter with laundry quarters.
Feminism made women disposable. So today a lot of females are around 40 and single with a couple of kids to raise on their own. Child-support payments might pay for a few pairs of shoes, but in general, feminism gave men all the financial and personal advantages over women.

What's worse, we asked for it. Many women decided: you don't need a family structure to raise your children. We packed them off to day-care centers where they could get their nurturing from professionals.

yungz:
he's looking for a suitor that will worth the money he spent on his girl's head and op you are certainly not the person.

At op assume say na range or benz you pull up with for in house the man no go fit talk that rubbish wey in tell you.

Seems like the man has measured you already and it happens to b u came with only leggedis benz na why in throw you format.

Op i will advise you to hustle hard, make money and visit the man again, i'm sure this time around he will accept you as his son-inlaw before you even propose marriage.

exactly...I am not supporting the father but after hustling to send your daughter for masters in the most prestigious private university in Nigeria and securing a great job for her will you allow her bring a factory supervisor with HND?

I like being realistic. Most guys will advice girls to choose men they will not want for their own daughter .

Imagine as a father,after all your sweat and sacrifices to train and mould a girl into success she brings a pauper like shibaraba home as a fiance,will you agree??

While I believe love and her choice should come first,the father's effort and plight should be understood

sunnyeinstein:


Source: https://lifestyle.thecable.ng/does-the-covid-19-crisis-pose-more-danger-for-asthma-sufferers-in-nigeria/

Cc: Sissy3, dominique, lalasticlala,

I can't be caught unawares..being using seretide diskus daily.

Gracealone:


Interestingly, Nigerian laws focus on child brides only but not on grooms.

magnoliaa,budaatum,what do you have to say about this child groom? Should the law takes its course or only if its a child bride the law should intervene??

CAPSLOCKED:


MOOD SWINGS, DRUNKENNESS, PREGNANCY, UNDER SPELLS, PERIODS, ZODIAC SIGNS.

THESE ARE SOME EXCUSES FOR PEOPLE TO BE ARROGANT. IF THEY'RE SICK TAKE THEM TO THE DOCTORS. ONLY MEN LOVE LIKE SHEEP BECAUSE WOMEN WILL DUMP A MORONIC MAN EVEN BEFORE HER COUNCIL OF FEMALE COUNSELLORS ADVICE HER TO DO SO.
IF YOU TOLERATE ONE SILLY BEHAVIOR IN THE BEGINNING OF A RELATIONSHIP BE READY TO TOLERATE IT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

If its a man with the mood swing it is called toxic masculinity

pansophist:


No, It don't make any sense to posit that men perpetrate violence against themselves, just as it doesn't make any sense by saying, women kill themselves by maternal mortality. What we as humans can do is to reduce unnecessary suffering, which has led to the reduction of war globally compared to preceding centuries, and the lower state of maternal mortality. And I repeat, if men did not put their life in the front line, humanity will not have gone this far. You are downplaying men's contribution that made your life awesome, which is not surprising, as downplaying the importance of men is a needed approach to feel like a victim. keep it up.

Yes, my stance is that the teaching of patriarchy isn't real, and it is nonsense. Though, I can see that we both get the definition of patriarchy different. If you interpreted patriarchy the way feminist does, which is that its a system designed and structured to oppress women (inferring that it is a deliberate act), then I do not agree with it, and it is total rubbish. If you define patriarchy as the traditional way society evolved to the present, such as inherited paternal name, paying of bride price (which is a cultural ritual as oppose to buying a woman as feminist described), men defending women and women being a primary caregiver, then yes, I will agree with you that patriarchy is a thing. Judging thousands, if not millions of years of gender interaction from the standards of today is wrong. For example, the killing of twins used to a culture in Calabar, until it was put to stop by mary Slessor, will you say it is willful oppression, or it was due to the ignorance and unexposure of those community? Should present-day twins start a movement to feel like an entitled victim because of errors of the past which were not deliberate? That is the problem with feminism.

What has toxic masculinity has to do with boys being the victims of Boko haram? Can you explain what toxic masculinity means to you? Also, can you explain also what toxic femininity means to you as well? Do not skip this part. I need answers on this.

I mirrored matriarchy with patriarchy in my response to fummisticqueen because feminist tends to think in terms of binary, such as the oppressor and oppressed, patriarchy and matriarchy (which you acknowledged as a thing), privileged and unprivileged, etc. I am not inferring that such societies are matriarchy or patriarchy. The message I am trying to pass with such a mirroring approach is that in any patriarchal (or matriarchial) society, there will be situations where the so-called privileged are disadvantaged. In the so-called patriarchy, men are passing through hell, and the so-called victims (women) have it better. A LOT. Also, I am not against advancing women's development, but what I am against is downplaying men suffering, blaming it on them, and labeling the cause as toxic masculinity. If men dying to defend their land, so you can live in peace is toxic masculinity, then I do not know what to make of it. Just as I will not say that maternal death is toxic femininity, after all, females are given birth for their own ego. Does this actually make any sense to you? Na waaa oo

Everyday city life is not filled with danger and is not perilous, due to male sacrificed, which you either deliberately refuse to see, or refuse to acknowledge. That you can just order for food online, go grocery shopping, and drive to the cinema have been sacrificed and built by the blood and ingenuity of men. The everyday city is not perilous because the animals that probably would have killed you have been tamed, given a reserved separately from human habitations. Your favorite shoes have been delivered by men who spent months in vessels shipping it from one continent to the other, some dying in the process. From the cellphone you use, the water and purifying it, and maintaining the ''non-perilous'' city life has men working tirelessly in the background''. Workplace death is over 90% men, and because it is not your reality, it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Once again, you downplay men's contributions that make your life good, and that is what dents feminism.

Ok, so now you are not saying that women want good sex from men, but that only a few women ''that knows'' want good sex? You said earlier that men satisfy women sexually because of their ego, why changing your narrative now? Why shifting the goalpost? Women want good sex from men, period. because few men can actually satisfy doesn't invalidate this timeless truism. Of course, when a man can satisfy her women sexually, it is a good feeling (or an ego boost as you label it), which is nothing wrong in itself. Just as women feel good when they look beautiful and desirable, why shouldn't men feel the same? What exactly is wrong with good feelings (or ego boost as you call it), can you explain?

In the past, the ability to give childbirth is an ego boost for women, so what is wrong when a man is biologically suitable enough to impregnate a woman? what is the ego you keep screaming about? what is wrong with it? If I am a woman and my womb is working enough to give birth to a child, I will be happy and have a healthy dose of an ego boost. Also, you keep making the mistake of judging past societies with today's standards, can you move on? Men have never put the responsibility of reaching their sexual satisfaction on women. Most men satisfy themselves, by themselves, why do women put the responsibility for their sexual satisfaction on men? why fake orgasm? you don't have to. If I fake orgasm, is it women's fault too? can you be responsible?

To be honest I don't understand magnoliaa goal shifting.


When patriarchy is defined it is defined in terms of toxic masculinity and not chivalry.
Patriarchy is only portrayed as oppressive to women. They have a biased definition of patriarchy.

Captain-save-a-hoe never pays ,to women men are oppressors.

CAPSLOCKED:
NIGERIAN WOMEN THIS AND THAT, UNA NO DE TIRE?

since I remember being alive I have never seen men discuss women issues as much as this sorry bunch on Nl. Women!women! Women!

Magnoliaa:


You agreed that men perpetrate violence against themselves then.



Sure. Just like how women also helped preserve the human race from going extinct and we are here. They kept the social world and other non-physical aspect that makes us us.



And there's a Rosa Parks in history too. Just saying.

Great. We have moved here all the way from the previous eras. And all you just described isn't patriarchy? Yes, men did all those and more. So what's that? Men marry women through bride price, the woman goes to live in the family's house, things are only passed down through the father's line, only his name is recognized, etc. That is not patriarchy?

You actually used the term I was about to give you first lol. You're the intellectually dishonest one here. I'm surprised, for all you know and how your present your views, you say patriarchy isn't real. That's always been your stance. Even the other men on here do not deny that. You tried to discredit feminism. Talking about how men have it worse. And I say they are not on the same path at all. Your words, ''what about the boys? What about the countless men killed by boko haram?'' prompted me mentioning that men are responsible for these things. It's a part of the issue - toxic masculinity. You make things look as if there's a collective bias against men in these situations.

Were those behaviours necessary? Yes. Healthy? No.



I don't know what you're doing here. Shameful way, selfish, inconsiderate, bla bla bla... Your perception is colouring how you're interpreting my words. It is what it is. I am saying what is. That's how it happened. I'm not disputing the reasons, and effects and all that. My messages are simple and straightforward. The main reason I quoted you was because of you trying to invalidate feminism and place patriarchy side by side with matriarchy. Or are you saying women should keep quiet because men are going through worse? Boys are being killed by boko haram? Same men kill men and women. So what's your point? Addressing the issue of men being more violent reduces the number of men at the receiving end also.



Is the everyday life in a city filled with danger and perilous? Is strength the only important attribute for survival?

On other things you said, believe what you want.




Yes, they do. That is for *women who knows*. Lesser than the number of women out there who are ignorant, repressed and just allow.

And then how many men are actually good? And what's your point here? Does it change the fact that it boosts their ego?



I'm a woman, so I should know things about women, who are the receivers in this case.



@ bolded. So you know this. Why are women not sexually satisfied? You think if they have considerate and selfless partners who put them first, they wouldn't be? (p.s, you do not necessarily need all those external enhancers to enjoy sex). Sex has always been something a man take. Women demanding for more, and the increase of that is fairly new. Do men not brag about their conquests? How well they can hook a woman with mindblowing sex?? I don't get why you are arguing this, I swear. The 'conquering' of a woman is tied to their ego! Gosh. Women fake orgasm for that reason. In time past (even till now), your ability to impregnate a woman is tied to the respect you get from your kinsfolk. In the community. Isn't a man's ability to provide for a woman tied to his self-worth? Is this too hard to...

And another one. Yehh, I'm arguing blindly here. So darn right.



Just stop here ohh. Do not reply at all.

Don't.i beg you. How could it make sense na. Matriachy that you can't prove. I don't care for the hows, whys, and other considerations in this discussion (I didn't say they are unimportant, unnecessary now), you quoted funmisticqueen trying to show how matriarchy exist and its working against men. You were trying to mirror, or what did you say.

That's what I contended.

It's as straightforward as that. They are not same. And don't operate at the same rate...

why are you bent on discrediting men claim of matriarchy?why don't feminists focus on laying out their case against patriarchy, fighting for liberation and leaving men to lay out whatever case they have against matriarchy?

You feminists making feminism gynocentric, for the women alone,your fight and focus for women,you didn't include men plight,we should sort ourselves and form our own rights movement (I get this when I try to tell feminists that men and women also suffer and they should see things from both sides but the snap back that we should start our own movements). Now guys are laying their plights you are subtly silencing then with the
1)you can't compare men plight with ladies plight,they are lesser.
2)are men plight not caused by men?
3)all men suffer is to boost their ego,they go through it because it is attached to their worth.
So if we are to go by this logic,all women suffer ranging from enduring domestic violence at home,submissiveness and infidelity she does so because it is attached to her worth ie ability to keep a marriage,thus she shouldn't call it oppression, we should what she does to keep her home ,it is for herself?

So if men independently chose to start their movement perhaps what we call menininism, feminists will leave their lane to tell us we have no claim?
You want to hold the victim card to the end.
Men's right movement isn't popular yet they face this opposition when stating their plight?wow I Wonder how they will shoved aside when advocating for themselves. Pansophist men have a long way to go.




I guess by matriarchy he refers to a gynocentric society


Edited
On the sex being what men take,you are changing your mouth,I have seen a post in the past where you said if men and women have sex none used each other,they both enjoyed themselves.
Anyway,men enjoy themselves because they work for it,we sweat,we thrust why she lays down. If she wants pleasure she should get to work the way we do

CAPSLOCKED:


GUY, A MILLION?
WHERE THEM GO SEE 20K USE CHOP FIRST?

[img]https://s5/images/ezgif-2-bb81ab7ea10d.gif[/img]

Descorts:
you're a fvcking asshole. I bet you are one of them worthless bitches begging in the streets for crumbs to eat
Like someone used to say, I bet your parents are living in deep regrets now...it would have been better your dad wanked off at the bath tub and watch the semen flow down the drain like a boss than see the product of his loins develop to be a worthless rotten fruit. I sorry for you.

lol..are you new on this forum?the wretch you are quoting is a frustrating troll that is obsessed with redpillers...dont ever feed a troll attention.

Check their account balance,how many of this women here have ever had a million naira in their account?they will be broke shaming men on this forum whereas the are not worth a million naira

GreatResearcher1:
1. What is redpill?
Redpill in its simplest term means TRUTH. The opposite of redpill is Bluepill. Bluepill in its simplest terms means IGNORANCE.

2. Who are redpillers?
They are those who have swallowed the redpill. That is, those who have embraced the truth.

3. Truth about what?
Truth about how the woman nature works and truth about life in general.

4. Do redpillers get married?
Of course they do.

5. Do redpillers have sexual urge?
Yes.

6. Are redpillers women haters?
No they are not. The love women. But they know when to draw the line.

7. Do redpillers love?
Yes they love. They make the best lovers.

8. Are redpillers selfish?
Inasmuch as redpill teaches how to put ones self first, it doesn't really makes one selfish. That is, watch others die hungry while they (redpillers) filled their tommy. It only teaches one the difference between being selfish, being kind and being stupid.

9. Are redpillers mean/harsh?
No they are not. They are humble and kind.






Still Typing

guy,the way you carry redpill matter for your head eh?
Na your type woman go still konk for head collect money.. Abeg take am easy,no die on top redpill or woman matter

Magnoliaa:



No. I did neither. I'm only saying what is.




I did not say alll thesee. You're going off on a tangent. ?? In reality, how many women are wrecking havoc in the world? See, if more women become terrorists, etc (i.e they become more violent, 'manly', and so on), trust me the number of women in the defense forces will rise. But when WE advocate for women going into these fields, anti-feminists say it is unnatural. And yet still demand for women fighters? You cannot demand for something you vehemently oppose its happening.



What is it about at the end of the day? Valour, honour, violence, financial responsibility. . . It's all things men take pride in. Are you saying now that men don't do things for their ego? The Chase, hunt and all that? That's what I'm saying, don't get me wrong. Whether it's bad or not, or whether it is beneficial to them or not is another case.

Men uphold other men to these standards.
Lemme ask you personally, if you had the choice, like absolutely do, would you do these things? Put your life on hold, run into a fire and die? Think deeply. You just might been socialised into being A MAN. That should be all things to a woman. Would you rather not do these things?



You don't always have to agree with me, and neither am I meant to fit a mould you thought.



Feminsts do not say men and women are equal in strength. That's all been anti-feminists arguments. Feminists have never, ever said we are same biologically. What argument is this, where? When? I accept that strength can work against us in some cases. But all of this is more than strength. Far from it.



That's in a context. If you followed the convo. also you'll get her point.



Because it's from FEMINIsm's point of view. Again, have your listened to feminists talking about the effects of patriarchy on men? Even C.N.A acknowledges this.
Are women responsible? No. Patriarchy hurts both men and women, so when feminism talk about women issues and what men do to them, you bring your cases, too. Cases that are caused by men. So ''men, too'' is not an argument against feminism. I'm saying women are not the cause of your woes, so patriarchy is real. And yes, women enable patriarchy too.



Right. World fighting for women when feminism isn't even 200 years old. The 'girl child' narrative is a recent culture.



It is men making the rules lol.

But I'm not doing this again. You can research it. Bottom line is: are women the cause?

I perfectly understand your reasoning and troubles (maybe partly), it is valid. You can talk about it, heal, and do all sorts. But whatever y'all go through is not because of some hate spread by women to make you miserable. Patriarchy causes OUR (gender) problems. That's what I'm highlighting.



Is it not acceptable?




LOL. So, me, that refuses to buy a pet is equal to a person who bought a pet and absconded? Leaving it to roam in the streets, eating garbage? Dumping the responsibility on a family member?

Don't even go here. No comparison at all.

Fact is: most women are staying and living with the consequences of their actions - having sex WITH a man. Most men are FREE to run away. We have single mothers for a reason. Now, both of them have reasons why they wouldn't want to stay, but only the mother remain.



There's a lot wrong with these statements. You and the woman made a baby. And you don't get to choose to be responsible to it. You ARE to care for that baby. I already mentioned why it is necessary... The woman is not getting herself pregnant, so either way(abort or pay), you cannot remove yourself. If I self-reproduce, then I have no business with your provision.



What ever. We should all be better. But if women are a particular way, you wouldn't have to be all things.

If women don't expect bride price, then you don't pay.
If women are not shamed, then they'll ask you out more.
If women are financially free, you get to not work for a woman.
If women are not sexually inhibited, then they'll be wild, take initiative on the bed. You also wouldn't have women conflating yes and no, doing push and pull with consent.
And so on and so forth.

Women changing (in every aspect) will automatically shatter some ''abnormals.''



Whatever, but matriarchy/misandry is not a thing [if there's an academic/sociological proof or research, I'll like to see it]. And in cases where women are favoured above men, it's not systematic. Collectively created by women.

i couldnt go through the stress of quoting individually ,i hope you can link my comments to the posts they were directed at.
you still didn't get my point on the abortion and child support. YOU SAID a man must cater for a baby because he was involved in the sex,why is a man choice not considered when making the decision about the baby? Why must his pocket be involved but his say on whether to keep the pregnancy or not ,not be considered?
They both made the baby,both should be included in the decision to keep or terminate the pregnancy.

Lol..google is your friend,do browse about misandry and matriarchy.
In other words clamour for equality and a revolution is tied down to how prominent an issue is and whether its systematic or not?


Your pet analogy is so flawed,using it to juxtapose my point was a wrong idea.
Why not use this example,

Mr A and Mrs B are at a pet shop . it is expected they purchase a pet for entering the pet shop. The lady holds the pet and insists they take it home but the man for reasons isn't ready to have a pet tells her to drop it off but she refuses and purchases it.
The man is later forced to be caring for the pet when he kicked against her purchasing it because they both entered the shop (signifying sex).

Needles to say the issue of abortion and child raising should be mutually agreed it,its not only when child support is needed a man must be involved the couple owns the foetus right from conception not just her. You can't exclude his rights and decision throughout gestation and childbirth but only regard his involvement in the sex when child support is needed.

So you are blaming men for women woes and blaiming patriarchy for men woes?
Feminists dont ever wanna agree that women also oppress men to some extents they turn the blame on patriarchy..
When a man abuses or subjugates women he is an oppressor, but when women do so well "it is patriarchy that caused it" . when laws disfavor men you use "is it not men that made the laws " as excuse. In that case should oppression of women by their fellow women be overlooked since its females that put it in place? Take for instance mother in law and daughter in law feuds ,where MIL subjects their DIL to vigorous labour and abuses and threats should be ignored since its their fellow women that perpetrate it?

Needless to say,there is a need for revolution and eradication of patriarchy, the question boils down to how? How should feminism be carried out that there us equality and not a gynocentric world emerges ?else we have men groups popping up claiming victims and then starting up their movement till the world become a man versus woman world!

Magnoliaa:


In other words, men being at the receiving end of things perpetrated by their gender.

The 'issues' men faces, as you pointed out are not because of women/matriachy. That's the difference. Whatever a man does FOR a woman is for himself. E.g, a man taking sex-enchancing drugs to satisfy his woman, no. He's doing it for his own ego and how long he can last. A man going to fight wars, make ends meet is because his worth is tied to that. Everything they do for women is because of themselves. Whether consciously or subconsciously.

you ended up trying to make excuse for the plight of men by finding reasons for them or using the blame card of 'its their gender that caused it".So because bokoharam is mainly populated by men its innocent men fault that they are killed? You are excusing matriarchy...
If a terrorist group is incepted comprising of mostly women will it not be men that will go to war to fight? Would the world say women are suffering from what was perpetrated by their own gender?
So why should we be blamed when privileges are secluded to men alone if its men that establish the course?
For example,a male starts university,he gives admission to males mostly (80% and above) ,will feminists not cry foul whether or not it is a man that established the university?
What a man does for women is for himself?really? Men that put their lives on a pedestal for women?men that run into burning houses to bring out their wives? Men in the titanic-type of scenario?

You were one of the women I respected on this forum but I couldn't believe you could make such a comment. All men do is for themselves?
You all should listen to what martinez39s and ubunja says about captain-save-a-hoe because women will never appreciate.

Yes, it's matriachy. But not a systematic matriarchy. I'm sure RisenPhoenix will agree: the way the polygamous marriage developed in the same way in almost every cultures. And even if we analyze these few polyandrous systems, I doubt it'll be oppressive as much as much its counterpart. Women are physically weaker, get pregnant and take care of kids.

So now you are admitting there is a difference in strength because you want to make a case for women. When strength is used as a basis to seclude women from some privileges you feminists disagree that men and women are women are equal in strength but when strength is used as a basis to favor women you will accept there is a difference in strength.
I saw a post of liberal chick you shared whereby she said a man should not hit a woman back but he should walk away if she hits him. You all use women as weaker vessels as alibi always.

Nope. It's because of patriarchy that women get excluded from these things in the first place. Yes, I know it puts men at a disadvantage, but it is still patriarchy. As in, you're the man so you should bear the brunt. You should die, make money. Patriarchal men like you also make up the legal system. Men make up prison warders, policemen, inmates. See, men scattered everywhere. On the sea, in the air, so it follows that they'll die more. Yes, women are excused, but that's the PATRIARCHY. I don't know if you see my viewpoint.

so why is patriarchy p portrayed as a system that oppresses only women?
The theme of this post of yours is:when patriarchy hurts men,well its the men that put in place patriarchy so they should deal with it,when partriarchy hurts women the world must fight for the woman.

Why do men have higher sentences than women for the same crime? (I am betting you will say "is it not men making the rules"

Individual cases. Are you comparing this to the numerous cases out there of runaway and deadbeat fathers? When a woman makes such decisions, it's for herself and other reasons (financial, emotional, career) but a man do that simply because he can.

So you are using " frequency of occurrence " and "reasons" to score points?
You think men don't have reasons for not wanting pregnancies such as finances,emotions and career?
People insult dead beat dads as irresponsible but women that abort are excused on the basis that they have their reasons. There is no difference between a dead beat dad and a woman that aborts,both abscond from the responsibility of sex.
If a woman should be given the right to chose to accept responsibility of sex or not(abortion), then men should also be given the right to choose to accept the responsibility or not.

If men should be forced to pay child support women should be forced to keep their babies.vice versa

You've not disprove feminism/patriarchy. Only showed that these things happen side by side. It's your choice to be offended or not. Doesn't invalidate feminism's fight.

feminism has done alot for women,at least ladies can go to school,vote,etc..I commend the movement for it.
Its a pro-woman movement,I accept,it will never see things from a man perspective and look for men. Its goal is to save women alone from patriarchal system and ignore the man. I accept. Men should seek out for themselves,that is why we have the redpill.

Patriarchy is oppressive(both to men and women); systematically put the genders at a disadvantage, and advantage on different levels. Women carry the baby, but the baby carries the man's name and the line is passed, kept running through that. It is a lot of things and cannot be equated with matriarchy. Even decisions that favor women are mostly because of the disadvantage they face. You paying child support and all that is because the woman end up with the kids, caused she's been groomed to care for them, the emotional burden of single-parenting, and juggling it with work. Ditto this for other scenarios.

'Matriarchy' is a response to Patriarchy.

My problem with feminists is that when tables are turned they use the line"the effects on men are mild" as an excuse to ignore men plight. They start using dynamics of power and strength to place women as the real victims. What is wrong is wrong, whether men can swallow it or not.

The issue of making misogyny an offence came up,the men's right movement pushed for making misandry as well a crime. Feminists were angry and claimed that misandry has little effect on men.

Yes matriarchy is a response to patriarchy. Is it a justified response or egalitarianism should be the response? Its like switching from one subjugation to another.
"Females are superior to males " ideology used to compensate females is not better than patriarchy.

I hope when men reacts to Matriarchy with blunt force,they will be allowed to do so.

Casalindal:
Last night I got really stressed woke up the morning and I notice I’m having leakage the water in my womb seem to be reducing... I’m dead scare it not even 3month yet does this mean my water has break God please help me. I’m presently at The hospital I need your prayers please if I have ever wrong anyone on this forum I’m deeply sorry I need all the prayers now..

no one will take you serious here now whether you are saying the truth or not. That's the problem with clout chasing.

If you didnt have a history of attention seeking many people would have flooded this thread with advice and it will be pushed to front-page..

Wish you recovery though-if this is true

funmisticqueen2:
you know abortion is illegal in Nigeria, right?

so who are those buying mifepristone?who are those doing D&C?

As for the case of rape, they are being threatened to keep silent, let's not forget the stigma, and of course the fact that the police aids and abetts rape as far as the rapist can pay them off. This is not a first world country. The sentence for rapists is not heavy either.

I am not too current with Nigeria law. I stand to be corrected,the senators passed a bill for life imprisonment for rape.

If they are actually silenced as your think who are those utilising the power of social media to share their rape experience?
Who are those being arrested that makes news on social media?

Police don't excuse rape they excuse crime once bribed. Its not only rape! Generally when you can bribe the police FOR ANY crime they can let you go not just rape.

How about male rape, and sexual molestation of men? Who listens to us? I can't recall how many times I was abused as a kid. Or is it my female lesson teacher that sucked my penis?or ladies that have groped my organs that I dare not say a word about it else I would be written off as a joke

Nigerian laws don't support women. The law encourages paedophilia here. The same law allows an old man to marry an 11 year old.

you have no proof for the bolded. If you said the progress is slow ,I will have agreed but making it feel as though the law and society claps hands for men will be dishonest. Such changes don't happen over night.
Nigerian law is not to support women but Nigerians(men and women inclusive). There is a ministry of women affairs, there are women rights activists ,what else do you people want?
Should men and women attain 100% equality you will want more special treatment.
Who are the people chopping off men penis or pouring acid on men for dumping them? Who are the ones pouring hot water on men just for suspecting cheating?

So I stand my ground.

Men are allowed to get away with too much in this country, and yet, this generation of men are dissapointments.

okay ,your truth.
I also believe this bunch of women of today are a disappointment and a feminine mockery of our mothers

funmisticqueen2:
that's conditioning by African society at play. If a woman says she is rich now, and she is the one paying school fees, she will be called arrogant and the man starts acting out because he is emasculated.

But I believe that ladies should improve their self esteem.


So why am I one of the most hated females here, because my self esteem is above average (a lot of work to get there) and I say my truth in a way no one wants to hear. Men in Nigeria, live off putting the women below them. That's why I call it privilege.

Why do you think we have redpillers here. The are the ones who cry foul because they are losing their privilege.

you were hated not just because of your truth but because of your man-hating and shaming which you have stopped.


Men set their standards and how they want to live,if the women are dumb enough to accept it then it's not men putting women down but women dancing to the tune of men.

I agree Africa endorsed depravity of men but will you deny things are changing?divorce rates are higher now,women are the ones with the power,pinch a lady and human rights activists will move with banners and the men persecuted.
The society is making up for women. All you have to do is make a post with supporting pictures online and wait for the world to come to your rescue.

I saw a post of a lady stripped for stealing,the people who stripped her have being arrested while for decades men have been lynched and burned to death for stealing yet the perpetrators go scot free.

You talked of endorsing polygamy,with the rate of paternity fraud now you are yet to realise that women are now the main cheats in marriage/dating. Were you not the one that gave excuse for a lady that slept with her gym instructor? If tables were turned you will call it male depravity.


The society has done more to speak for women that they have become gynocentric and no man speaks for males. What else do you want from the society? The entire nation supported bukola dakola (without concrete evidence of the rape),they are many social media handles and pages that are pro-woman,even men now speak up for women and call their fellow men pigs. So how is the society enabling subjugation of women?

More awareness is created for paedophilia and rape.
Was a senator not taken to court after slapping a lady? Are NGOs and celebrities not helping the girl child?how about the little girl called success that is now enjoying scholarship?
Was Yerima not opposed when he married a 13 year old girl years back? So who are those that are encouraging men to misbehave?

You should know when the battle is won and advice your fellow girls make wise use of the power they now have.

You say the society will call a lot of women arrogant for real? Are you not following current trends? Who are the CEOs we have now? Go to Instagram and see ladies advertising their makeup and clothing brands. How about Jaaruma,the leading sex therapist in Nigeria making her own name despite having a husband? Except they are ghosts you are referring to but i don't know any male that put ladies down for being successful more than their partners,perhaps it existed in our fathers time but not now...


If successful ladies hide their wealth and attribute it to their husbands its probably out if fear that YOU(FUNMI) will call them pick mesha for not marrying a man more wealthy than them . Did society tell the liar amatarasha to lie about having a husband or him taking her to Siberia?

To ladies,being successful is having a man higher than them in finances, that caters for them,anything short of that is being pickmesha so the ones who aren't lucky that jam wealthy men have to lie to prevent people from calling them pickmesha.

Redpillers speak their truth the way you speak yours. They have a healthy self-esteem and want the best for themselves ,if you don't know there are redpills for ladies as well on reddits.The idea of them wanting the best and seeking for men interest is what you call narcissistic and oppose but when you encourage ladies to seek out themselves and set high standards you see nothing wrong with it.

The summary of my epistle is that the narrative is changed, women are getting powerful by the day,anyone lady that still gets burnt didn't play her cards well or is not wise