₦airaland Forum

bukatyne:
➜There is nothing wrong with the traditional marriage system; just make sure you never lose the ability to provide and provide well if you want to maintain that model.
It is a travesty if you want to maintain a traditional model while you are broke. Then you become like 'P' in psychology.

That is the major problem with the traditional marriage system. It is too rigid in requiring that the man provide all of the time while the woman submits all of the time. We now find ourselves living in a time when that model can no longer hold as it used to, and it follows that a more flexible system that insists that the man becomes the submitter whenever the woman becomes the provider, and another that allows both to share provider and submitter responsible is what is needed.

Christmyhope:
➜Those who walk in Christ Jesus are no longer under the rules of sin. For the Bible says "sin shall no longer have dominion over you because you are not under the law but under grace. Sin has been defeated spiritually through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ although believers still dwell in the world where sin is still predominant.And this is as a result of free- will of humanity and consequences of fallen state of the creation.
For those who are dead in Christ Jesus are no longer answerable to the demands of the world. For the Bible says " walk in the spirit and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh".
Sin shall be totally defeated on Christ second coming and believers in Christ live in d world by living in Christ Jesus through the power of the holy Spirit., the pledge placed on us. Hence, sin is destroyed in Christ Jesus especially for those believe and live in Him.

Stop regurgitating the meaningless bullsheet you have been force fed by equally ignorant numbskulls already! 🙄🙄🙄🙄

Daejumong:
“Pastor Adeboye promised me he would swear that I would succeed him as general overseer if I stayed. He also promised to make me the general evangelist of the entire RCCG to prevent me from leaving”- Pastor Tunde Bakare in his autobiography ( Pages 249/250)
•Culled from Pastor Tunde Bakare’s autobiography, ‘The last but definitely not the least’. You can read on Amazon. It was released Nov 2024 as part of his 70th birthday celebration •

This man would become the new CEO of RCCG Empire? Not even Remi Tinubu, Egbetokun, and all the other pastor-politicians in the same company? Well, if the shareholders are all in line, who am I to say no? Na wa oo!

2elliot:
Sorry to hear.
My niece is around 11yrs and has been free for about three years. I just hope that the hearing is permanent.

A child? Wow .. has her parents taken her to the hospital to verify that she is no longer a sickler or is the sickness merely lying low. I had a classmate in secondary school who has some very good years too. He eventually died of the illness after we all left highschool.

2elliot:
✓ I am the last person you will tell that to.
I have had health issues, at a point I counted over 15 health issues in my body. From Benin, Abuja, Port Harcourt, Kogi state, my own state Bayelsa, I visited numerous hospitals in all of these states, both public and private. None of these hospitals solved even one of these problems. At the general hospital in Gwagwalada in Abuja, the Doctor even swore with her certificate that there was nothing wrong with me, just because she was tired of attending to me. There is no drugs I didn't use.
✓ At UPTH in Port Harcourt, the doctor told me that I was going end up in wheelchair. So, I am the last person you will talk to about orthodox and Herbal treatments. I have tasted both and I saw the big difference. Today, I am still walking and agile is because of Herbal treatment and massages.

You counted health issues wey no get names? It is very hard to believe a lot of these stories, you know, as there are many people out there who are in fact hypochondriacs. 🙄🙄

2. Why were you told that? What was the name of the illness that he insisted might do that to you? 😩😩😩

ariesbull:
©️ Queen Abigail

Ngozi is regretting she did not live in face-to-face back before she left Nigeria?

Please move right back to Nigeria abeg!

wany:
You are exaggerating, lmarriage is very nice and beautiful when you find a loving and respectful man,not an egoistic rude partner, in Africa submission means enslavement, this makes the instructions of marriage unattractive for the Gen Z.
If there was no hitch there won't be raise of feminist and mind you there are also male feminist.

Submission in general is enslavement/servant hood/servitude. It is noted as same everywhere since those are literally the dictionary meanings of the word..

tunapawizzy:
✓ Your attempt to disguise harmless norm as misogyny is as tired as it is transparent.
✓ Accusing me of arguing contradictory ideas,yet you haven't shown a shred of understanding of either. You only highlight your own intellectual laziness by refusing to examine nuance. No one else should take responsibility for that inadequacy but you. And this is a good point to stop dignifying you with responses.

Harmless norm? 😩😩😩

Anyways, I am not the one attempting to disguise your "Harmless norm" as misogyny. I have not made any attempts at poking at that at all. I have instead been focused on trying to get you to be more honest and to do so intelligently.

2. How can I claim understanding of your contradictory claims? Are you OK at all? Recall you have yet to come domain clearly your original statement where you insisted that since females submit at work to their male and female bosses, they should on that token equally submit at home to men. This is your original statement which you have, more than 3 responses later, yet to clarify. So, please stop beating around and take responsibility for your inadequacy here..

press9jatv:
but not rampant

That is just one of the examples of transactional marriage contracts that existed even during the time of your ancestors. Marriage has always been transactional. At least no man enters into marriage without expecting to selfishly benefit from it, hence the transactional nature of the union.

tunapawizzy:
1. It's ironic that you speak of intelligence while making a sweeping generalization and resorting to insults. If you're trying to sound smart, you're failing badly.
2. The classic "insult when out of depth" tactic. When you're done performing, let us know. And if you can't handle disagreement, stay out of grown-up discussions.

Making a sweeping generalization in a country where the norm is that women submit to their husbands— husbands are heads over their women—, in marriages? The most likely reason you feel insulted by me is likely because of the obvious way I highlight the flaws contained in your very claims.

2. Telling you your reasoning is unsound is not an insult but merely an admission of a fact obvious to the naked eye. You are attempting to argue two completely opposing ideas as though doing so ever makes sense.

press9jatv:
not rampant in our forefathers days ooo. The difference is very clear

You forefathers all had contractual unions, many of which they simply ended by sending the women back to their fathers' home when tired of them to get their money back afterwards. It was always transactional.

tunapawizzy:
➜Nigerian men don't have a problem submitting what they are expected to submit to their wives and children.
➜ Nigerian brand of feminism is toxic whether u follow line of reasoning or not.

1. They don't have a problem submitting to their wives, yet the average Nigerian man believes that it is his woman alone who is to submit to him. You don't even know how to tell intelligent lies, do you?

2. Your reasoning is unsound. I pointed that out before now, yet you followed that up with yet more unsound logic. That is what is clearly toxic!

tunapawizzy:
➜Nigerian feminists: association of women who don't want to submit to their husband but totally submit to their male bosses at work. They can't at home, but na them dey make tea, kneel down for male oga for work

Don't Nigerian men equally submit to their male and female bosses at work?
Don't Nigerian men also submit to Nigerian police men and the army men... Does this not equally point to the general hypocrisy of the Nigerian men who refuse to submit at home to their wives?

I am trying hard here to follow your line of reasoning here so help me out.

kpankpangolo:
Find a debate elsewhere.

That was instead meant to help you reason for yourself. This is 2025... engage those aging brain cells before they completely abandon you!

kpankpangolo:
➜If it wasn’t a natural birth, she should disappear with her story of accomplishment.

Where does this natural birth requirement come from? How much does a woman get paid for such births? What is the benefit of a natural birth on the body of the woman and maybe even the child born through the process?

LordIsaac:
➜2Tim. 3 Verses 16 to 17 [16] All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: [17] That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works.

Again, first of all, Paul the Jew, the one who is supposed to have written that letter, said absolutely nothing of what you claim. If this marriage love is indeed as selfless as you pretend, then ask yourself, why did Paul the Jew forgo partaking in it? 🙄🙄🙄🙄

I hope you also don't mean the same Jesus Christ of Israel, who also didn't partake in this selfless act of marriage love you supposedly described? Think! Think!! Think!!! 🙄🙄🙄🙄

correctguy101:
➜ This over sabi man, you don quote me with una nonsense...
What kinda nonsense question is that? Who'd be so bored to be fixated on somebody else's definition of love? Or of anything in fact? Probably not this Daddy Love like many others mean different things to different people oga... If you can't even understand something as elementary as that and are just fixated in whatever definition you pick from somewhere and hold to be true, that's ya problem... I no even watch ya video as IMHO, it's probably nonsense... This ancestor doesn't need anything outside our Royal self to define whatever we feel? Oya slide comot go front...

Clearly, this is literally an admission of having no clear, unambiguous idea of what love is. However, he pretends to be certain that this concept he is ignorant of, is what marriage is built on. Can you imagine that? 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

donbenie:
Bitter Leave FC AKA Online in-laws.

Stop lying!

Sunnyshinylight:
➜At the end of the day you made no sense or added value to the post. Just bitterness and more whining Give yourself joy. You don't deserve to suffer like this please. Life is good.

This from the one whose post reads no different from brain farts from a mind experiencing a psychotic episode! 🙄🙄🙄🙄

Faposky95:
➜The captivation of a soul in its hole. English descriptives is not life. Get married or try dying in one..... Carry that cross or shut up

I see you only speak blah, blah blah!

elmodee7:
There is a big difference btw submision and slavery.

Stop telling this lie! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

LordIsaac:
1 Corinthians 13.

Again, first of all, Paul the Jew, the one who is supposed to have written that letter, said absolutely nothing of what you claim. If this marriage love is indeed as selfless as you pretend, then ask yourself, why did Paul the Jew forgo partaking in it? 🙄🙄🙄🙄

I hope you also don't mean the same Jesus Christ of Israel, who also didn't partake in this selfless act of marriage love you supposedly described? Think! Think!! Think!!! 🙄🙄🙄🙄

press9jatv:
before it wasn't like that

It has always been like that— there is no before.

LordIsaac:
➜1 Corinthians 13.
➜ Jesus is Lord!

First of all, Paul the Jew, the one who is supposed to have written that letter, said absolutely nothing of what you claim. If this marriage love is indeed as selfless as you pretend, then ask yourself, why did Paul the Jew forgo partaking in it? 🙄🙄🙄🙄

I hope you also don't mean the same Jesus Christ of Israel, who also didn't partake in this selfless act of marriage love you supposedly described? Think! Think!! Think!!! 🙄🙄🙄🙄

press9jatv:
yes . Everything is transactional now

. It has always been transactional.

LordIsaac:
➜ If it were impossible, Scriptures will not affirm it. I have seen love, and I have been loved...and I have loved. Love someone today!

You religious goons too dey lie! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

Which scripture book affirms what, abeg? Which of your scriptures definitively states that marriage goes hand in hand with selflessness and marriage cannot exist without this thing called selflessness? Na Buddhists note abi na Aphrodite love you dey claim? Nothing selfless about those.

I mean, think! How many men do you know of who have ever married a woman, not for their pleasure but her own?

Brandiebird:
➜Yo! I spoke too soon! Having looked at it. I think it's a genius idea! I wasn't thinking about the practical devision of responsibility! I was stuck on the moral stuff. Thank you Kobo! I love the way your brain works sometimes 😂

Like I said, it is for those who value their peace of mind, and mental health above all the stewpid dramas that may ensue during the rollercoaster that is a relationship. I no wan wait until I almost murder someone abeg! Me...I like to know when it is OK for me to simply walk out and not have to look back 😂😂😂😂😂

LordIsaac:
➜If something is not ubiquitous, it doesn't mean it doesn't exist!

It also doesn't mean it is possible either.

Marriage is entered into by a man and a woman who are looking to selfishly possess each other for personal gain. The man selfishly claims the woman for his own and does so so that he may benefit the most, while the woman also does the very same. To suggest that there is a selfless aspect to the union is to contradict the very reason for the union. This notion that a selfless love is involved in marriage is utter nonsense.

Brandiebird, do take a look at how to create one. https://www.wikihow.com/Relationship-Contract

I would recommend it to anyone considering entering into a serious relationship where peace of mind and maturity are a requirement.

DyshApp:
➜What do you think? Why is there still so much shame around fertility issues in Nigeria? Discussions like this are what we live for! From real-life stories to hot takes on love, marriage, dating, and society — our group is where the gist never ends😂
Want to share your opinion? And hear more unfiltered stories like this? Join our Relationship Group today and let’s talk!(Link in Bio)

The current generation is not ready to move past the culture of shame around fertility. That seems to be the problem. Take the situation with IVF and the religious Nigerians out there. A good number of the testimonies regarding childbirth given in your churches today are the result of IVF— artificial insemination. However, this fact is rarely mentioned during the pulpit testimonials(not even the names of doctors responsible for the miracles are hinted at).

Brandiebird:
➜How is that any different to all the promises made, and sweet nothings whispered in the honeymoon period.
➜ There's no court that will implement the contract because its not legally binding.
➜ Nobody goes into a relationship declaring that they will cheat, lie and steal from you or that you want to be cheated on, lied to etc.

A contract is documented and signed by both parties in the agreement. Your verbal promises and sweet nothings as just that which you could deny, or even convince yourself were never really meant to be believed. The content of a signed, sealed agreement is not easily denied.

2. Court? You don't need a court to implement such a contract. You simply need the agreement of both parties; if penalties are defined in the contract, however, then you may wish to invoke the power of the court if one of the parties attempts to reneg on the agreement.

3. Wait a second... a contract isn't meant to keep anyone from cheating, lying, or any of the sort. No, you can't keep humans from doing what humans would do. A contract instead defines the terms under which the relationship can be defined as valid, and includes possible penalties for violation of the agreement. For instance, a man could indicate that if, during the relationship, the woman is found to have cheated on him, at that point the relationship is terminated and she is liable to pay him Naira 1,000,000 for damages &/or give back all of the gifts he gave her during the relationship. A love contract is merely to state the terms and conditions under which the relationship is to be considered valid or terminated, and what should follow from there.