Datboredberry:
Lol...

Love generally is taken for granted...

the biggest challenge to Love in this new age is lack of trust. love became rare not because most dont deeply love and care for another but because the view about Love is changing therefore nullifying the real essence of love.. The premonition is that love is for the faint-hearted, so most people (both male and female) have started training themselves not to succumb to love.
Like I do tell people Love is not an emotion. Love is what you do..

I don't need to be emotionally in love with someone who needs my help and I help out... my helping that person out is an extension of love..

why is it that we can help a stranger who genuinely needs help but find it difficult to help someone we dating who also needs help..

the reason is because, the culture and tradition we have now give us a view that relationship is about who holds the power and whoever cares less about the other holds more power.

and there we go not thinking about love but about power in the relationship rather than love

Datboredberry:
I'm being sarcastic with the entire post...

The reason men say they are better than women... Because they are logical... They aren't controlled by their emotions... Etc.

But you see tons of these same men wailing that they've been heartbroken... That women are manipulative... Etc.

It's hard to see a man cry... Most think tears are 'feminine'... It's dumb.

I think the former argument BY MEN backfires... It makes it seem that men are beyond feeling love so they can't be hurt... They get recognised as strong but that doesn't help when they are weak and in dire need of emotional support...

Sometimes, it's hard to believe any man I've been with could truly love the way I did... Sad but true.

I think they must be so tough... Because they make so much effort to appear so.

you are completely on point..

the truth is that generalisation leads us to miss the truth. as long as we keep using an unqualified few to represent the traits of a polpulation, we keep making decisions and choices..

Are you single ?

Loreettaa:

What's your story?

lol.. does there have to be one.

Kindness218:
I learnt my lesson the hard way. A cheat will also be a cheat. I chose to be a single dad than be with my ex

may I ask how you know she cheated?

FalseProphet1:

People repent but the consequences of their actions is what you must be prepared to deal with for the rest of your life if you choose to marry him/her. That's the message she's trying to pass across and I fully agree with her.

This I have seen.

yea I understand.. I just believe it doesn't definitely mean it will always end in tears.. humans are too complicated to measure or assess.. the one's with terrible past may or may not be better than with the one's who claim not to have a terrible past..

how do you even begin to dig into your supposed spouse's history? is it feasible? how much info do you intend to find that can help you make concrete conclusion? does one's past always define the person's future.

I agree with her cha.. the way she phrased it is what I don't agree with.. she coined it in a way that makes it feel like there are others out there without a negative history and such person choosing to be with such a person made a decision that he/she will live with for the rest of his or life when actually it's whoever you marry you will live with the consequences of marrying such oerson for the rest of one's life (irrespective of what are past may be)...

the ones with a terrible past may have a great future and the ones with a great past may have a terrible future... please note that I used MAY..


all in all we cant define people's future by their past

Favfables1:


Yes they do...
Buh remember that actions have consequences and some of these consequences can follow a person into the future...
Ending up with such a person, even though he/she has repented, will automatically mean that you have to also deal with that consequence....

True.. just the same way the other party will also deal with the consequences of our own past...

I just believe no matter how much we try to use our logic to escape rough patches, the more we end up in it. I've seen girls who did their best to avoid dating someone like their dad ending up marrying someone who is exactly like their dad.. sometimes, in life, it's all about taking a little bit of faith and trusting that all will be alright. That's what I feel though.. not necessarily right

as much as you are right, does that mean people don't repent?

gift2xl:
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO HER AND TO ME. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME, SAME MONTH SAME DATE.

so we share birth date too... Lol Hapy 31st birthday to us.. 13- Aug - 1989

It's obvious you value her more than she values you. Question is why do you value her this much? Are the reasons mature or immature? Or you just hate that she broke up with you first? Or you simply scared of being alone and starting over?

My principle has always being I can't even think twice bout a girl that doesn't add any tangible value to my life neither will I wanna be with someone without upping my game to be valuable too.

State the reasons why you want her and think long and deep whether they sound mature or not and you will be able to judge your maturity level to be in a relationship.

Cos all your statement bout losing 2 girls in school because of her sounds like what a kid will say.

Plan your life first and then you will know who deserves to be a part of it. For you to be lamenting just shows you love her more than you love yourself and no lady finds that attractive.

If it's sex that's making you wanna hold on, that's the easiest to get.

There is nothing like ZERO personality. You probably don't like your own personality. If so list out what you don't like about your own personality and will like to change NOT because of a guy but for yourself.

List out the traits you will love to have.

Make friendships with GUYS you admire. You have a good chance of meeting a friend through them that you will like COS they are more likely to hAve friends who have similar characters like theirs.

For every personality, there's a guy. Just define who you wanna be.

Keep making friends and developing yourself and see all lines fall in pleasant places.

DONT FORCE IT

Rozz:
The person below has contrary opinions and believes some non Christians can make heaven only if you don't accept the mark of the beast. Again my pastor said some muslims believes in crist and coming back of Christ and those ones will make heaven if their good deeds surpasses the evil deeds, and he said some of our forefathers who never got the message of Christ will also make heaven if they are good,so only God knows how He will pass his judgement.

we are Christians I want to believe. I think we should follow the scriptures (2Tim 2:14) and avoid arguments.. Arguments is born out of lack of basis.. let's define our believes by the scriptures not by what we think or heard only.. Your Pastor may be right but did He support it with the scriptures? How do you know He is saying the truth or any of us are saying the truth?

Let's base our points on what the scripture says

There are obviously 3 phases to this topic:
PHASE 1 people in the era before the coming of Christ

These people are splitted into two (the Jews and the Gentiles which means any one who isnt a Jew). The Jews were given the Law which they were commanded to follow and breach of this law is punishable by one penalty or the other e.g Death, Restitution, etc as we read in the pentateuch. It's by these punishments there soul is redeemed. ACHAN who stole in the days of Joshua (Josh 7) is a good example.

As for the gentiles in those days, I honestly cant say much except for those who were saved based on their affiliations with the Jews such as RUTH, RAHAB THE PROSTITUTE, ETC. I'll personally read more about gentiles of old though cos I have never paid much attention to their lives.

PHASE 2 people in the Era After Christ's First coming
The Jews and Gentiles who received Christ are combined into One ( The believing Jews and the believing Gentiles)
In Luke 14:16 Jesus gave us an idea of what's up, He made it clear that the Jews were primary receipients of Christ salvation but because of their refusal to accept him, He will bring the gentiles into the fold.

In Matt 15:26 Jesus told the woman that It's not right to give the meat which belongs to the Children (JEWS) to Dogs (Gentiles) but after hearing the woman's response which shows faith in Him, He adhered.

Even apostle Paul said we gentiles are saved by Christ's grace not our good deeds (Eph 2:

I can go on with many verses to make us understand that Salvation comes only from Christ.

Jesus Himself said no one can come to the father except through Him.. By saying We can be saved through good deeds means we call Him a liar that We can go behind him.

He said He's the way, He's the gate.. but we are saying we can pass the back door called good deeds.

As for the Jews who didnt accept Him because they have always know themselves to be the children of God, He has these verse to say Luke 14:16.

PHASE 3 the era of the great Tribulation ie after Rapture
The major thing is not to receive the mark as we all know.. But from what the book of Revelations taught us, It will take the grace of Christ to escape the pain and hardship of those times without receiving Christ. People may try to go with their strong mind but their powers will fail them cos there is only so much they can take before they succumb. Only Christ can help those people in those times even in this present time sef (Matt11:28)..

Which means it's better to find Christ and find Safety than risk going in with your strength which may fail you..

All in all EVERYTHING LEADS BACK TO OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST Who is The Way, The Truth and The Life

Rozz:
Are you trying to say all we need do to make heaven is just to be a Christian and your good deeds does not count

what I'm saying is, Your genuine acceptance of God's price (accepting Jesus sacrifice) wipes one's sin.. meaning we become born again, without sin.. if Death comes at that moment such person will make heaven as we saw concerning the thief on the cross beside Jesus in Matthew 27:38, Luke 23:32-43 and Mark 15:27. But if the person after accepting Christ love genuinely is still alive as we still are, such person needs to build on the foundation (salvation) cos all your actions and inactions from then defines whether you've fallen back or still on track... Alot of us may not know when we've fallen hence why we need to keep giving our lives afresh till the coming of our Lord or till Death calls..

see it this way,
Giving your life to Christ genuinely. wipes out all your sins which coulda led to hell
it gives you a new start

Not giving your life and doing good deeds means you have stains called sins which can lead you to hell which you havent wiped but hoping your personal deeds will wipe it

Bible says "For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God".. so that person doing good deeds as long as He hasnt cleansed himself through Christ salvation is a Sinner only doing good deeds

there is the foundation (salvation) and there are crowns we will receive based on what we build on that foundation. which Apostle Paul kept talking about. 1cor 9:24-25, 1Thess 2:19, 2Tim 4:8, 1Pet 5:4, Rev 2:10

salvation gets you to heaven, your good deeds and other acts you build on that foundation (salvation) is what will define the crown we get..

you may be saved without a crown.. the thief beside Jesus was saved and made heaven but because he never got the chance to build on it through good deeds has no crown

but doing good deeds without the foundation (salvation) is like building on sinking sand

no one since the coming of Christ will make heaven except having accepted Christ as their LORD.. Those of Us who will make heaven will make it not as a result of our good deeds but based on the sacrifice made by Jesus on our behalf.. there are many scriptures that buttress this facts.. as far as those before the coming of Christ, Only those who lived by the dictates of the Law of God made heaven and those who had paid for their sins through death..

Eulalia:


Sorry to disappoint you, my ardent follower.
You can learn from the others here too. M?

aiit. my amiable leader

Eulalia:
Not worth talking about.

after following you back to back, I'm actually interested in knowing Please be nice and share. we may learn one or two things.

he has a plan.. trust me

Magnoliaa:


Imagine. People don't want what they do to others happening to them...lol

I'm telling you dear. they are all over the place. boasting how they cheated others and always quick to play the victims e.g OP when Its done to them.

you stole your fellow guy's girlfriend despite her telling you she's got a boyfriend and now you asking if she is serious about you.. lol.. dude, you both deserve the future heartbreaks coming your way.. you never chi chumchin

Johnsghana:


Dear Mbapaine, as much as I want to align with your assertions, i still beg to differ. One year of your life for the greater good and real life education is not a big deal. Many Westerners fo on what they call gap year , they just spend one year away from school learning about life, culture or travelling the world. This is what broadens the mind and increases your emotional quotient.

My personal experience: I was born and brought up in Lagos, went to primary, secondary school and University in Lagos. If not for NYSC, i will not know any other part of Nigeria. Anytime I read or here people in Lagos or Abuja complain about the quality of life they live, I see them as ungrateful.

NYSC exposed me to different people from other parts of Nigeria and their various culture.
I can say that my NYSC experience prepared for living and working abroad. I'm more tolerant of other people's culture and views. My take - no matter how full or empty the cup is - your perspective is what matters.

FYI: There are poor neighborhoods and rural areas too in the Western world too. The govt cannot fix everything alone and definitely not in one day. We all have a duty to contribute our quota to nation development and the welfare of the less privileged amongst us.

well you spoke like someone who came from privilege.. so I can relate with what you talking bout.. NYSC for you is to relax and get to know about other places.. but do you know those I met during NYSC, those who practically begged and sold their lil Assets through school.. knowing other cultures is the last thing on their mind.. are they put into consideration when enforcing one year of their lives to be dictated for them..

Govt can’t fix everything but they don’t need to add to the sufferings of this people..

Have a friend who’s greatly older than I am during service year. He kept mummering how age is against him and how slim his chances of getting jobs are and now NYSC is going to make it a lot harder cos a year will be added to him before getting to job market

Learning cultures and visiting places is not one of the basic needs of man, Work, security and the likes are

You may enjoy NYSC as an opportunity to give to others and enjoy other cultures cos Basic needs are not your worry.. your family’s got that covered

We have to start learning to put ourselves in others shoes

I’m not suffering too thank God but I think you should learn to put yourself in other’s shoes

Picture yourself having to sell some of your cloths and shoes to pay through school and then end up with a year of learning other’s cultures

charliboy654:

U are so correct, especially those posted to those northern villages, imagine being in a school for more than a month and you are told that the students are not ready to resume, person go dey morning till night doing nothing.

I’m telling you.. May God’s grace keep us and guide us especially corpers posted far from home who at the end can’t really explain how the one year commitment have been a benefit to them or even the students they set out to help in harsh conditions

Johnsghana:


Mr. have you ever heard of the Peace Corps and AmeriCorps in the US? Goole it!

These programs are voluntary in the US where patriotism and nationalism is very high, there wouldn't be problems with getting people to sign up.

NYSC is very important to many rural communities in Nigeria, that is the only way the can afford to have a doctor or nurse. Many corps members do a lot of charity work during their service year that impacts many poor lives.

I haven’t heard of peace corps and Americorps, but I’ll google to learn more.

I appreciate you pointed out it’s voluntary. Dunno if You have am idea how much difference it will make between having a choice.

And as for the rural you talked about, you justifying that the youths’ life and time should be sacrificedto complement for the inability of the government (esp Local Govt) to perform its duties? Or you dunno that it’s the statutory duty of the Govt to provide basic amenities for its people. That’s the primary reason for tax, oil licensing, etc and not to be shared among greedy politicians?

So in summary, you saying instead of Govt using the money to employ capable hands with the nations income, they should divert the time of their youths to such while they can live large?

Not even talking bout the psychological effect of students having new teachers every session from one Corper to another?

How can consistency be there when the students know they can’t bond with a teacher that will soon leave.. how will they give their all

Education sector which should have been the bedrock of the nation is placed in the hands of people who weren’t trained to be teachers..

Killing 2 birds with one stone: delaying the graduates and destroying the educational system with one blow called NYSC

TheFacelessMan:


You are not enlightened.

Google "compulsory military service " and get back to me.

Israel, Brazil and Sweden all do it, last time i checked.

Criticize with sense, next time.

Cc JohnsGhana. Don't mind him.

sir military and defence are necessity to human’s survival.. are you telling me NYSC is a program for military training? I won’t say you are not enlightened, I rushed to comment.. military training is a productive program sir.

seunfly:


Lol!!! Go to somany advanced countries like Russia, South Korea etc, they also do things like this infact their own is full millitary training and they are regard as reserve incase war breaks out and the country needs more hand.

are you telling me military training is unproductive.. Man learnt how to protect and defend himself before learning anything else.. tell me what peeps are doing during NYSC and pls don’t tell me teaching..

What’s the point of calling something good when it’s cons outweighs the pros

qanda:

NYSC is not a waste of time, it appears to be a waste of time for individuals who do not understand or refuse to understand the importance of the scheme. People are lazy by choice. I have so much to say in response to your comment...shining examples why NYSC is one of the best things that have happened to this country, besides, do you know some other countries visit Nigeria to understudy the scheme?

Whenever I attend a Job interview and I am asked "what did you do during your NYSC", I get the job!

Young man, NYSC does not waste peoples time, people choose to waste their time - thereby robbing the Scheme of its shine and robbing themselves of the benefits of the scheme.

sir? What did you do during your NYSC that didn’t involve you cheating the system through ghosting or using connection or money to get your self a good place of primary assignment sir?

And sir I will appreciate it you school me afresh on what it’s meant for cos my last lesson on that topic is that ex-president Yakubu Gowon created the scheme to bridge the relationship of ethnic groups across the nation after the unfortunate civil war.

And if only 2% benefits from the scheme,then it’s called a failure project.
Still dunno how 2% benefit legitimately though

And if they divorce? Nigeria is the only country in the world choosing to waste the time of its youths on this kinda unproductive program..

this program makes us lazy except those who break the rules by ghosting which is an offence.. so it’s either you are productive by commiting an offence or be loyal to the Law and end up being lazy for a year.. *Spits*

NYSC is a good example of saying our Leaders (past/present) are not intellectual enough to lead us.

Majority of blacks are cursed with avarice anyways

Dont put yourself under unneccesary pressure. Its only guys who lack reasonable goals and aims or who havent gotten their lives together that will be worried bout a lady leaving. Plan your life, set life-transforming targets, love her in the moment, dont get your hopes high. Your emotion and intellect should be be channelled into not failing and being the best you can be and then you will be the one having issues with which girl to pick and not you being scared of a girl leaving. Being scared of her leaving probably means you have inferiority complex. If it persists, you will live in constant fear of losing her all your life and funnily enough you will spend less time on things that truly define your life (career).. Dude date her in the moment and focus on what matters now (career) and she will be the one begging to stay in the long run

MissRaine69:

I commented on a thread.
My affiliations regarding faith is a personal matter.

just asking but I respect your privacy

MissRaine69:
Life is a lot more straightforward as an athetist.

Miss Raine, are you an Atheist?

Presidiotbuhari:
All igbos should not attend any church owned or Pastored by a Yoruba person.

All Ndigbos should stop developing all yoruba states too and stop increasing revenue of yoruba states by working there but go to the East to work and develop there.. Dont you think that way Biafra is achieved without too much stress.. Atleast no one can force Ibos to work in yoruba states nor Fulani states

Slimszy:
Greetings everyone, my name is Kalejaye O. Tosin, a Nigerian Photo-realistic artist.

Here is my drawing of Zlatan Ibrahimovic made with Graphite and Charcoal pencil on Paper.

What are your thoughts?

DM me your digits, I will like to patronize you