₦airaland Forum

Conceptman:
this is tough, are u her first love? From the conversation u both had, u are her only hope, situations like this looks scary, u are in it already just make sure you don't hurt her so that she won't take her life or even hurt you, with time everything will be fine and moreover she's still young and she has really gone through a lot, u just have to be strong

I think probably he misled her. When it all started initially, he ought to have made her understand that he loves her as a person and would always be there for her but not to the point of dating.

Whenever the two of them converse and he uses the word "love", her meaning of it is deeper than he thought. For her, it means she's his lover which might not be his intention.

I'd advice him to see her one on one, sit her down and make her understand that he will never leave her but she should see him as a big brother not lover.

That way, she's assured of his company, support and guidance. Then, give her time to heal.

Hmmm.... "he loves me a lot!". I don't know if there's another definition of love but with what you narrated, I don't see any iota of love there.

This man is filled with insecurity and how on earth will you agree to continue in a relationship filled with violence?

Well, we can only advice you so the decision is solely yours. But then, these are red flags/signs of the impending dangers in your proposed marriage. An insecure man will do almost anything to ignorantly protect his partner.

My advice: Decide if you'd want to live to face the challenges ahead if you eventually marry him OR leave to live.

Hizzy:
Na still 40years gap

Yes and that makes his uncle's age twice his age as against when he was 20years and the uncle was 60years which by division, is thrice his uncle's age.

the question is, why is it that his age reduce from thrice to twice even after another 20years added to their ages?

Hope this helps.

that's what they do with constituency allocations.

npowerng:
Payment will commence on the 20th of December 2019.

Will December stipend be included?

Iamgrey5:
This proves nothing tbh.

No Ebira man was on the ballot when okene voted in 2015.

It was late prince Audu an Igala man that contested with Wada.

You are very correct. The reason why we have this kind of result from kogi central was because, both ebira and igala were out to make a point.

The Ebiras didn't vote for Bello because of his performance, they voted massively for him because of the igalas that wanted an igala man there. same goes to the igala people.

Pafoma:
What if i have detached from these circles even before i met her, we had met and started dating when i found out about them.

I mean, what will their respect do for me because we dont belong to the same circle any longer. If she can prove that i will not regret my decision then maybe i might be willing to risk it

It's her past..so I believe.
If you know that you won't be able to handle it in future even after you are married to her, please let her go.
Don't pretend that you can handle what you know within you that you can't handle(from the way you are sounding now).
Don't make her pass through hell with you in marriage, let her go if you can't handle her past.

Just2endowed2:
Na waoh. So this woman is powerful. Thought it shouldn't matter much for the incumbent government. Why the senseless attack

Its very simple. She is from the same senatorial district as GYB. People(mostly ladies/women) loved her and as such, she's going to share the votes with GYB there.

Then, Kabba/Okun is Dino's territory which means GYB may not have reasonable votes from that region .

Igala is where the PDP candidate comes from which also translates to mean that GYB will have to share his votes there too.

So, if GYB can succeed in knocking the woman out, he will most likely get a very large votes from his area(Kogi central) hence his efforts to intimidate the woman but he has failed.

Iscoalarcon:
I think it is your bank's fault and the issue of this AI I don't think this useless good for nothing banks will integrate it into their system not until they are forced to do so because they indirectly benefit from this glitches

the AI suggestion is a good one. If anyone knows how to develop algorithm that will help in achieving this, maybe the person should make a proposal to them. You never can tell...!

frankmoney:
Give it out to civil servants and other interested normal Nigerians that can show proof of income and they should be paying monthly ...

God bless you. This has been my idea long ago. In fact, its another way of making money(on a long term) for the government.

I believe if they can give it even to only the civil servant, deduct the rent from their salary Monthly, this will increase the government's IGR.

This can be done across all parties and it will ease the pressure on housing in the state.

But we have a set of clueless leaders who aren't thinking with their brain but anus.

Let them state the price and you'd see that it's in millions. Then the circle continues.

08037458080

Logan95:
Good day house.

I meet my girlfriend recently in school, she's an undergraduate student while I'm a post graduate student.

She is a very beautiful girl and well endowed. For the few months we've dated she's one of a kind. She has a good heart, buys me stuffs even though I'm not poor, cleans my house and relates well with my sister to mention a few.

However she told me about her ex, she loved him and supported him financially because he was a student and broke.

We have been going smooth until this night she decided to tell me her past without me asking. She said I am too special but I have to know who she truly is.

She started by saying she's had two abortions for her ex, that she slept with many guys for money which she eventually spent on her ex. I was dumbfounded and I'm in a dilemma now. She just said I should forgive her that I don't deserve her.

I don't know how to tackle this majorly because she confessed without me asking and she did all these before I meet her.

Let me advice you as a brother...
1. If you are capable and have intention of having a serious relationship with her, take her for a test to be sure she can still conceive(if having kid(s) is a priority)and her womb is in good condition.
2. Its her past, we all have past so forgive her and let go.
3. For the mere fact that she confessed without you asking means she has a good "conscience", she's going to make you happy in future.

But, if you feel you won't be able to deal with her confession/past in future, kindly let her go. Don't ever use it against her in future.

lordsharks:
A Nigerian man has cried out for help after his inability to locate a single woman that would pass his wife material test.

In a text he sent to relationship expert, Joro Olumofin, the man shared details of his test and revealed that ladies keep failing it because they lack discipline and he is ready to settle down and searching for the one lady that will pass his test.

"Hello Joro where will I find a woman who will pass my wife material test. No girl has ever passed this test. I'm getting old. I want to marry.

Please share on your blog joro. This is the test; So I invite a girl to my place and ask her to fry plantain. If she can't fry all the plantain and not eat 1 she is not a wife material.

So many have failed this test. Some eat about 9 pieces before it's ready: She lacks Discipline, she will fall for temptation easily, and she can't maintain resource well.

It's very simple test but all girls keep failing. Why can't it be easy not to fry and not eat 1. I prayed about it today in morning mass. Where is this girl? Are you out there"

Lol...if they don't taste it, how will they know if its OK? Don't bother looking for Miss right, look for miss left and drag her to the right. SIMPLE!!!

Stargurl20:
The teacher is correct. It doesn't matter if the word starts with consonant, aw u pronounce from d start matters too. So the answer is AN!

Irrespective of our intonation or the way we pronounce, what is right is right according to English language. Article 'a' is used with consonants while 'an' is used with vowels. The 'h' can't be pronounced silently so she was wrong.

BiafranBushBoy:
Not good and it is bullshit, I will explain.

Have you see a factory worker putting on a suit?

Or a footballer wearing an helmet and safety boot?

Every work sector have a dress code that allows for seamless workflow.

If he is doing this for the camera, no biggie then.

If this is real, then he needs some reorientation.

You have solid point. My thought is that he's doing this to attract favour from people who may find his way of business impressive.

Sirvingeo:
How old are you? The lady was so offended . She never knew my love for mature women made me ask her.

LOl...You can do this while chatting with her without having to ask her directly.

In a chat, try to know how old she was when she finished secondary school and the year. Then do your calculation.

Cutebabiesmum:
Good evening beautiful people, not like am suspecting my husband but I want to hear people opinion. There's this lady with 2 kids that is staying with her parent in our compound. I heard their landlord evicted her and her husband and they have not been able to raise money and get another apartment so she brought her two kids to stay with her parent while her husband squat with someone else.
I normally hear this lady greet my husband "good morning sir" "afternoon sir" I mean she always add sir anytime she's greeting him. But recently she stopped greeting him even if she come to our apartment to charge phone(their apartment light was disconnected and they haven't pay their bills). Just some months ago, someone from our compound told me my husband is giving this lady feeding money(a married woman o) I didn't believe the amebo because I have been the one financing almost everything in that house including paying my son's school fees because oga said he's broke which I believe him.
Is it possible he's dating the lady or am just getting worried over nothing? Please don't mind all my grammatical error because am not in good mood now at all

One of the signs of situation like this is if the lady in question disrespect the man as you've stated. Ladies do this mostly when something happened/is going on between her and the man.
Just be more vigilant, watch for major signs first.

obainojazz:

He overcame it so he could smash his crush...
I hope she won't give him AIDS

Lol...funny you. I think the lesson from this story is to keep hope alive irrespective of the circumstances and never to give up the "will" to live.

MelaninGold:
Thank you sir for your kind contributions. You have done well.

Your are most welcome.

MelaninGold:
Op is making some points here. But you need to be financially, emotionally and psychologically prepared before going into marriage.

A young man of 25 is old enough to get married but the economy of our country is very disabling. You will agree with me that some 25 year olds are still searching for admission due to the almighty JAMB or even finance. For those who are in school already,may be in 200l or 300l. Now, after graduation,NYSC.. looking for a job. This could take 2,3,4,5 years. When they finally get a job,they have to save enough before thinking of marriage.

Let's be sincere here..most men of 25-30 are not even serious-minded people.
Take Nairaland for example, I have observed that most young men and women are more interested in sex, violence, tribalistic threads than those that promote unity, innovation, education entrepreneural skills. Imagine if this peolpe choose to get married now.

Just to give an example of the disadvantage of late marriage. I know a family where the parents got married late. Mom was around 33,dad was about 36.They got married and had to start having kids. They have 5 children now, Their eldest child is 26, about to graduate. The other children are undergraduates. Parents are no longer working. Everyone now depends on the first born - soon to be medical doctor.

In a nutshell... early marriage is good y'all.

Early marriage is and will always remain the best. There's no doubt about this fact and I so much love your submissions. God bless your reasoning dear.
There are lots of factors that contribute to late marriage if properly dissected.
First is the area of finance. We all agree that the guy MUST be financially stable and have regular means of income before embarking on the journey. This does not mean that he must be earning millions before thinking of marriage. The amount he earns must be such that he can at least cater for two more persons I.e the wife and a child.
Secondly, he must be emotionally stable and have a great sense of humor, perseverance, tolerating and accommodating. These are ingredients that will help keep the marriage going.
Now, when you consider all these factors and lots more, how many young guys of nowadays have all these qualities and mind you, my second point has really contributed to success of marriage and lack of it also contributes to majority of divorce issues in Nigeria. But, to those that have the capacity to settle down at early age, please kindly do so.
For those still trying to find their feet, please don't take this post as depressant but rather, a wake up call.
May God answer our prayers.

08037458080

Hmmm... the bottom line is that they love each other. But then, his worries need consideration too.
First, how old is the woman actually? this will help in your friends decision. Sexuality has some relationships with age.
The higher the age, the lower her sexual desires and libido. Also, menopause is another factor to be considered. That's why I said earlier that her real age is a factor that will help him to decide what to do. Let's assume your friend is in his late 20s which means the woman is in her late 30s, he can still give it a trial.
Finally, I seriously hope the age difference will not be a major barrier in their marriage later on as this can crush a man's ego thus, making him regret his decision.
Wishing him best of luck in whatever decision he takes.

WeedSeller:
Is it a general issue of low verbal confidence or its only when he is around you ?
if you've seen him interact with people enough to understand he only loses his verbal confidence around you only then its all because he likes you a lot which probably is the reason why he is extremely self conscious around you when he talks which you'r mistaking for low verbal confidence. I would believe he had it built up in his mind for a year(s)to tell you this. He saw you beyond being a friend. He saw you as a partner. I'm sure he has verbal flow with his other female friends he has no feelings for.

Honestly,I feel this guy wll unleash the whole fun around you when he gets comfortable with you as a partner Or either way you can talk to him why he loses his self/verbal confidence around you.

A very brilliant contribution. Just to add little to this, just say "yes" and see him explode. Most nice guys are literarily scared of getting a "no" from the person they've been friends with when they feel they want to take the friendship to another level. Therefore, you see them behaving as though they can't stand in her presence to discuss emotional issues.

Slow11:
Hi nairaland Family,

kindly help out, i had to create this alternative moniker because I'm widely known here with my other moniker.

I'm a female nairalander, today is really a black Thursday for me. I have lost total Focus and concentration, very depressed at the moment. I'm diagnosed with HIv positive, being crying since morning. the worst part of it is, i'm a virgin, had never sex with any man in my entire life. I was advised to start taking medications immediately...

doctors and well experienced nairalanders in the house, will this medication prolong my life? will it cost me expenses? or the HIV will one day turn to AIDS despite the medication? I'm deeply confused!


kindly help push this to the front page, God bless you all!

So sorry for this. But you need to note that HIV can be contacted through various ways and not limited to sex alone. Therefore, stating that you're a virgin isn't really necessary.
Take your medications and live a healthy life. HIV is not a death sentence so you will live long as long as you keep to doctor's instructions. Meanwhile, if you don't want it to degenerate to AIDS, then make sure you follow STRICTLY the doctor's advice.

Kidaholic:
Lol, so after all the pains of labour, the woman will just wrap up the child like a Christmas gift to the so-called irresponsible father?? Easy to say tho.

Only a heartless woman can do that. Mistakes can happen, a normal woman can never abandon her child because of an irresponsible man. Carrying a baby for 9months is not easy talk more of the unbearable pains in the labour room.

Nyerhovwo101:
Okay o...na so Dem dey talk...when Dem enter now e go be different ball game. Nice policies anyway but should at least told us how he intend getting them achieved

Don't mind them. They will get there and start giving excuses of shortfalls in the country's income as the reason they can't execute their plans and policies. All what APC told us before 2015 election are still fresh in our heart. Nigerians don't know who to trust with our leadership mantle again. Only God can help us ooo.

McStoic:
Hian. This has got to be the most responsible rapist ever. In as much as i totally condemn rape, some women can so use it as weapon of black. How are we really sure that this is a real rape?

The lady said the guy jumped on her even when she said NO. I can deduce that probably, they were dating as at the time and maybe the guy was in the mood and the lady wasn't. Hence, the reason for the rape. Mind you, I deduce that they were dating then because if not, she won't hesitate to state exactly what transpires.
On whether it is rape or not, once consent is not given, it is RAPE!

Makaveli1166:
ASSUMING this nigeria vs israel planned war was recorded
in the Bible it will be like:
The Book Of 5th chronicle chapter 1
says and i read
.
.
1 And in the days when mohammadu the son of buhari
from the town of daura in kastina was president of nigeria
and in the 3rd year of his reign
2 behold lai the son of muhammed who was the minister
of information
that he spake ill unto the nation of israel saying "3 weeks
i give thee deport Nnamdi kanu or we shall smite thee"
3 and after hearing this the israelites pressed a button
and from the midst of the sea
behold a mighty missle carrying a nuclear warhead was
launched and it destroyed nigeria turning it into a
wilderness
4 and when the rest of africa saw this they cried
"oh nigeria a great country with great people has become
a desert and a desolation for radioactivity
oh nigeria we weep for thee because u have allowed lai
the son of mohammed to lead u into destruction

Hahahahahahahaha.... I can't stop laughing loud..... this is so funny.