₦airaland Forum

Toks2008:
My sister i want you to read this carefully and i bet what you are about to read may shock you.

A man of vision is not necessarily a potentially wealthy man.


Before you marry a man you must understand what he wants from life and trust me,some men have vision that has no affiliations to wealth and you must understand this and decide if you are still interested in being with him regardless.

Some guys has a vision to be activists,some missionaries,some to serve a king,some to be a chef,some to play talking drums and so on but the truth is that a man's vision is his vision so whenever ladies use these words "I want a man of vision" they must understand that some men don't even have vision to be wealthy but to be fulfilled and fulfillment in your career is never the same as been wealthy.

People who change the history of the world where not wealthy talking about
Jesus Christ
Isaac newton,
Nelson Mandela,
christopher columbus,
The Buddha
Mikhail Gorbachev
Winston Churchill
Woodrow Wilson
William Shakespeare
Martin Luther King

And many more too numerous to highlight. I can only imagine if Jesus happen to have a lady he was planning to marry and he tells the lady that his vision is to die for the world,will she still stand by him and marry him?

So when next a lady says "she wants a man with vision" Please don't think that every visionary man is interested in wealth so ask that guy well and decide id you are willing to stand by him or just take a walk and allow a lady who will go all the way with him come into his life.

Just trying to make sense.

U always drop it like its hot bro. On point as usual!

@udysweet - yes o, I have real super powers too. I can mend any broken heart with my magnetic charm

@nouvelle - so u are off the market eh kwa? And I was almost beginning to prophesy to myself, chai!

@saucekid - ur welcome to the group bro...ppl wey sabi cook plenty here o. I'm sure u'll get to know dem soon


Have a blessed week ahead everyone. I love u guys!

depressedsoul:
I was born and bred in Lagos Nigeria. i am over 30 but swimming in poverty. i attended a university in Ogun state but i dropped out due to the loss of my mother who happened to be my sponsor back then. My father died before i was 4years old so i had no one to fall back on. I am the only child and life has been so cruel to me. I have no job at hand. My fathers family has taken possession of his property at Agege Lagos because they insist my mother had me for another man due to stories i'm hearing for the first time since my parent's demise. The story of my life is so wide, bitter and depressing. The moral of my epistle is that i need a casual job to survive. I am contemplating suicide at the moment and i almost drank sniper insecticide today. This is my last attempt at survival before i do the needful on my existence. Nairalanders please help me find any legal job be it unskilled labour. I have tried and tried but to no avail. Pardon me for been incoherent. I am a depressed soul waiting to see if my life can have a second chance.

This is not fraud nor scam. if you really want to know how real my story is kindly send me a private message.

Bros u have access to the internet already, that counts for something. There's PLENTY opportunities out there that don't require much capital (plus information abt how to access SME grants/loans). Stop feeling sorry for urself, get up off ur behind and do some research. Peace.

Happy Sunday everyone! May the good Lord keep blessing us all and grant our heart desires IJN, amen.

Shout out to all my peeps, nouvelle, toks2008, ddshow, udysweet, halexito, vivaciousvivi, klassic, torqque7, bleble14, fourfunmi, siamia, et al.

Welcome ucnwafor and bisjosh

Bisjosh:
Happy Sunday to you all
Though I would be going to work soon.

U mean u work on sundays??

Sparkles003:
all which takes the grace of God.discipline not to be envious her seeing your lack in other men.dedication to you in terms of lifting words of encouragement

U know, the thing abt the grace of God is that it has already been freely given, and is available to whomever is willing to believe it and receive it. What dat tells me is dat God has already played His own part in my life "tay tay"...and the manifestation of whatever I desire (be it materially, physically, or spiritually) rests on my ability to recognize and play my own part. God did not make us intelligent beings for no reason. It is only other animals and plants dat can and should rely solely on the grace of God with no input of their own.

The power to acquire the discipline not to be envious, and the dedication necessary for uplifting loved ones is in our hands. If we realize this and internalize it appropriately, our love lives would surely improve by leaps and bounds. All of a sudden we begin to understand that those things and issues we care so much about are actually NOT THE MOST IMPORTANT things in life. Not even close self!

Toks2008:
I advice every lady reading this,sit that guy down,ask him about his long term goals as well as short term then decide if you are strong enough to go all the way with him.

For me,my vision is clear and no lady in this world will ever make me drop it...anyman without a vision is a total failure and if im a lady,i will prefer to be with a vision driven man rather than a man who just wants to get a job,retire at old age and depend on pension.

Did i hear someone say...what if the vision does not get fufilled?...well life itself is a risk and those who try and fail are far better than those who do nothing.

Take that risk with him,pray for him and if at the end of it all he fails,hug him and tell him how proud you are to have a man like him.

Aptly put bro, especially the bold part. I almost wept for joy at the wisdom in those words. Remain blessed!

klassic:
God bless you. My postulations is not only posited on premarital issues, but the fact that a guy with low income gets married, at first the wife is understanding and cooperating, the suddenly she wants more. Not only that, she is now Mrs wife, the guy loses his job and the income is gone down, same goes with the love and respect the woman is got for her man. Especially when it takes longer for the husband to bounce back. I was trying to state the fact that a woman/wife's love, respect and continuous loyalty is premised or hinged on the man/husbands continuous ability to provide and upgrade the financial status of the family. Cos when he fails in this aspect, the family love crashes faster than the stock exchange market.
On a final note, a woman will do anything to get her supposed man to change her last name to his. But the crux is what happens after that? The veil of the masked character is lifted and reality sets in. Soon all the honey flies outta the window.
Above all, it's a wake up call to men out there, that there is little or no difference between a boy of 22 who is got mad bread and he is "responsible" and a 45years old man who is bearly getting by.
The lesson my loving dad was trying to pass across, was the fact that don't wait till you are 25 to realize you a man, realize every 10 year old boy is a grown man, husband and father who is got responsibilities.
So the earlier you realize that and start early, the better for you. Cos you only earn your place as the head of the family and the accrued sugar, honey, sweetheart, dad, daddy, baby "even when you are 60years" when you perform averagly well as a man and still earn that respect even in death. If not, you just become what I stated in the first post, the most useless man and a dead bit dad. Guess nobody wants that . I rise.

I agree with u to an extent bro. Even the Bible says dat a man dat can't provide for his family is worse dan an infidel. There's no mincing words abt it, the love in a 'broke' home is not as sweet as that in an 'abundant' home. Of cos dis doesn't mean dat money creates love but rather it can enhance it. I'm glad u got the main lesson from wat ur dad said. Every man should strive to better himself financially in so that the love that exists in his home would be adequately enhanced.
The bolded part of ur post however is not entirely correct. It is definitely NOT A FACT and only a selfish woman would 'hinge' her love and respect for her man 'solely' on his ability to bring home the bacon. That kind of woman is still very immature and doesn't understand the issues of life. I rise

There's no need to quit. Just make d most of d weekends! Visit me I visit u tinz

SlimBrawnie:
We are getting there

Where be dat?

Sparkles003:
Honestly you just spoke the tboughts of 95% of women

Hmm, tanx for being so honest.

nouvelle:
Hmm, let me see...i've never thought about that. Ok, it's funny because the mutant I admire the power the most I don't like her character, especially when she became older- mystique. I admire her 'changeability' the way she can become anyone and adapt to any environment. It's a good survival skill but sadly, she's too mean.

Haha...I knew it! I was almost gonna suggest mystique b4 but I said let me allow u talk first. Don't worry, I'm sure if u had her skills u would be less mean...and less unclad too

nouvelle:
Romantic? Ok... thanks...? Urs reminds me of xmen, I like xmen, do you control metal?

In other news, ishilove follows this thread

Control metal? Only in my mind I like xmen too. If it were possible, who's special powers would u like to have?

I bet if there was a shop where wives are being bought, lots of guys would be keenly scanning the aisles everyday. Hmmm...its such a lovely thought to imagine and sometimes I wish it could be more dan just fantasy, but unfortunately it isn't. The stark truth i've come to realize is dat as men we must all pass through this "test of passion" as I like to call it, in order to WIN our fair maiden's heart. Yes, we must endure a lot of their 'nonsense' and other shenanigans to secure and also keep the prize.

Every woman no matter how mature, is naturally programmed to respond to a man's initial advances with coy skepticism (sometimes even if she 'gingered' the advancing in the first place oh). In other words she's basically saying 'I'll only give u my heart if u can convince me enuff dat ur worth it'. Of cos for u to do dat u have to pass all her numerous "tests", both material, physical, and spiritual (I must confess I really hate dis part cos I dnt think its even necessary but hey, it is wat it is). So she strings u along with her mind games and u oblige her, knowing fully well dat there is light at d end of d tunnel. All u have to do is keep up and don't slip up too often (not an easy thing to do for d inexperienced or clueless chap, who sadly, I used to be for a very long time myself ;-( ).

Anyways, the good news is dat women just love being beaten at their own mind games! Men are still in charge ultimately, and to make the process more fun we can even throw a few mind puzzles of our own into the mix, just to spice tinz up a bit, hehehe...
A wise man once told me dat to live successfully with a woman, you have to play the fool many times for peace to reign. To be very honest, I dey ask God everyday for dat kind of grace o, becos I know myself walahi. Can't say I have a major chip on my shoulder or anything but bros...when I'm right, I know I'm right, and no jupiter can convince me dat I'm not! Hmm it is well sha

nouvelle:
You are very right fourfunmi, a lot of people watch from the sideline, yours truly included

Just wanted to warmly welcome all the newbies: bluepearls, missbronze, fourfunmi, bleble14, vivaciousvivi, magneto

And to holla at the oldies: Toks2008, @halexito I like your write ups, gratefulme40 and as always Udysweet (est) don't stay away so much, this thread needs you . And @siamia, I got the hot cup of chocolate you sent over last time, hope work is good.

Have a nice evening everyone.

Tanx a lot nouvelle. There's something abt ur moniker, it sounds so....romantic. I love it!

bleble14:
@magneto and toks2008, thanks, hope ur day went well?

Ur welcome dear, I had a great day. hope u had a peaceful night rest. Have fun today!

ddshow:
You have programmed fear into your nervous system and it's been working like an instinct. You need to change your mindset and be audacious in approaching women. Hence, the first major step is to overcome your psychological barriers.

Secondly, always abide by the 3 Second Rule.

At a point in my life when I was looking into the challenge of talking to someone new every day for 30 days, I read about something called the 3 second rule.

The 3 second rule happens to be the most powerful pickup tool a guy or lady could have and is often referred to in these terms, but it’s a great tool for meeting new people in any context. The rule requires that if you see someone you’re interested in talking to, you have 3 seconds to walk up to them and start a conversation. It’s very simple, but extremely effective.

The reason why it’s so effective is because if you wait any longer than 3 seconds, you’ll probably end up over-thinking it and never say anything at all. With only 3 seconds, you don’t have enough time to let anxiety get the best of you. If you see someone you want to talk to, you must immediately go over and talk to them.

Stop worrying about what to say. Anything is better than nothing.

Plus, you’d be surprised by how much people especially Nigerian women actually like being talked to. And if we go back to the anecdote of being in a room full of strangers, how do you feel when someone comes up to you and starts talking to you? You feel great, right? No one wants to be the person who’s standing alone.

If we look at it holistically, you’re actually doing them a favor by talking to them, because out of everyone you've seen, you specifically chose to talk to them. If anything, they’ll be grateful that you chose to talk to them, not weirded out.

And btw, no mature lady is hard to get...all you need is patience, perseverance and the right attitude.

I hope this will help a bit.

Cheers.

such a sensible post bro...I've learnt something new. U deserve a medal!

@bleble14. Dis lady u are wholesomely and bountifully made...choi!! See packaging.

@bluepearls. Welcome dear, sorry abt d jilting. Permit me to tilt u back in d arms where u belong.

@toks2008. Egbon e be like say na u be area presido for dis background o. Make I first pay loyal. Tuale for u!!

@every1 else....fourfummi, halexito, missbronze, ddshow, udysweet, siamia, etc ...u guys rock! Loving ur comments so far. God bless this thread.

My ppl I don enter be dat. magneto is 33...magneto is single...magneto is willing

These producers get paid for their work by the artistes. They have thereby forfeited every right to claim credit. My humble opinion.

sholay2011:
Thanks.
O.C - Off Camera
O.S- Off screen

Ok, tanx man. Keep up d good work!

Beautiful piece sholay2011! I love the suspense and unpredictability. I wish I could write in script lingo like u tho...didn't quite get wat (O.C) and (O.S) meant

fpeter:
very true. Hubby is a diehard Chelsea fan....we got married and i told him i watch TELEMUNDO
He protested,he begged,threatened...he finally joined me and even his friends were like "guy u don convert"

Oya clap for yaself

jomoh:
By the term product you obviously confused the potential of Nigeria to the reality at hand.

You see. All these things you said Nigeria has, do you think the investors don't know?

Do you think they don't know that we have everything that can be used to generate electricity (wind, gas, nuclear, solar, hydro)?

Do you think they don't know we have one of the best lands for agriculture in the world?

Do you think they don't know we have the population to make profit for them?

You see. Potentially, Nigeria is a very good market. The oil, the population, the land etc but the reality is that corruption has made the potential unachievable. Nigeria has always had the land, the oil, and the population but what has been keeping the real investors from coming? Corruption.

What chased Richard Branson (Virgin Atlantic) out of Nigeria? Corruption.

What chased the CEO of Econet out of Nigeria? Corruption.

What made Cardbury to relocate its head office to ghana? Power sector corruption.

That is a word that can never be over emphasised on. People tend to undermine the influence of corruption.

Corruption is a disease no matter how rich you are no matter how much make up you wear, you cannot hide it from manifesting.

You see. No matter how good your market is, corruption will ultimately make your market useless. It is what ultimately killed GEJs government and the past government. With all his "good moves and intentions". No matter how good your objectives are or how passionate you and your cabinet members are, if corruption is not killed, it will kill your objectives and passion.


You said it won't inspire confidence. How?

Like I said in my previous comment, what Buhari is doing called taking responsibility.

Telling the world that ok, this is our situation and this is what we are doing to arrest it.

E.g.

Indian PM: My country projected an investment of about $12billion crude oil deal with your country in time past but due to some bottle necks we could not go through with it.

PMB: Like you all know corruption is a big issue in my country. { Indentification of the problem } This could have contributed to what prevented your country (India) from being able to complete the $12billion investment projection in our oil sector but my administration has vowed never to stop until we end corruption. We will only be needing your assistance in the repatriation of stolen funds that could be domiciled in your economy. { Intention }
This will enable our country to try and subsequently convict corrupt officials.{ Solution to the problem } By then, your country would be free to do business with ours without fear of corrupt officials sabotaging the deals. { Rebranding }

These are the things that inspire confidence in investors. That they know the head knows exactly what is the country's problem and that he is working towards changing it.

Apart from these, I don't know what else you want him to do. Go abroad and start telling them about how each ministries work? Or what exactly.

Ok, u have a valid point there. But tell me the truth now. Using ur example, if u were an indian business man looking to invest big in Nigeria and u hear the president say those TRUTHFUL things abt his country, will u in all good conscience go ahead with ur plans?? I think not. The wise thing would be to hold off and observe how all the anti corruption efforts play out eventually, before deciding whether its still worth venturing in or not. But of course u do not have the luxury of observing indefinitely, and ur money most certainly doesn't! Not when there are several other investment destinations available; albeit not as mouth watering as Nigeria, but profitable nonetheless.

Now its not as if foreign investors are not currently making HUGE returns in our "corrupt" economy. Not everybody went the Richard Branson way (besides there may be other reasons apart from corruption that informed his decision to leave). The fact is that IT IS STILL POSSIBLE to make huge returns on your investment in Nigeria. Period! I'm glad u said that these foreigners already know the conditions in our country, that means they are well aware of the risks and rewards of doing business in our environment. The risks haven't stopped some of them from coming, but now we need more to come. As a new president who has been widely acclaimed as a no-nonsense anti-corruption crusader, these foreigners are only looking to him for reassurances that their investments would be protected by HIS government. But the message Buhari has sent out in essence is, "Do not come and invest in my country right now. We have a lot of issues we're battling to resolve and I cannot guarantee the safety of ur investment".

But the real TRUTH is dat foreign investments in this country CAN BE SAFE, with better economic policies from a better government. That is the message our president NEEDS to be sending out! The sad part of the whole matter is dat we desperately need more foreign investment to rejuvenate the economy and avoid slipping into recession. By then it may probably be too late to attract any investment at all.

Lizabeth25:
Abeg, na phone you take type this your response abi na computer?

Cus you too vex...and your thing long die!

Ehn!!! U say wetin

jomoh:
How do you market a bad product?

Oh no, u didn't just say dat! Are u for real?? Do u even know wat it means to have the largest market in africa? Do u realize d myriad opportunities for investment in dis country dat is music to the ears of any savvy investor? And u refer to Nigeria as a "bad product"? #smh

FYI I'm not suggesting dat we deny d corruption dat has eaten deep into our economy. But PDP is no more in power for crying out loud! PMB shuld stop making noise abt d problems dat are being worked on and focus on keeping the economy from falling apart meanwhile, which is even more important. Broadcasting to the world dat our country is broke and corrupt WILL NOT inspire confidence for much needed foreign investment. It will only inspire pity at best, then disdain subsequently. Any wise foreign investor would never put his hard currency into an economy dat is unsteady. Moreso when its coming from d mouth of the president!

vivianblog2:
Give the outside world we are OK look. No sir. Tell them of the potentials here. Tell them things have been mismanaged. Tell them that we are dealing with the thing that brought us here in the first place. CORRUPTION. Let the world know that they all had a hand in the condition we are in. Because our stolen monies have developed their real estate sectors & boosted the liquidity of their banks. Our stolen monies continued to boost their fashion industry. Let them know that our industries all died because of corruption.

And that they did nothing to help fight it. Tell them they welcomed the monies stolen with a bowl! And then sent us grants after making profits from same. PMB should not cover anything up! Tell them that whoever buys stolen crude from Nigerian vessels will be named and shamed! Tell them we are broke. Shout it. Tell them that in spite of that, we have natural resources and untapped potentials. We have NOLLYWOOD. We have numbers. Land. Waterways.

And after telling them all that they will clap for you abi?? #olodo

Ndi a bu ndi asai!!

Maximillian1:
lol...is that how much u love physics?

Lol, as a matter of fact I never really liked physics. But our comments were eerily similar, and posted at d same time too! We were definitely on d same wavelength dat time...

Maximillian1:
lol na becos she no get assets na..norin to show

Dude, are u on wavelength 98532416980052.367Mhz also??

ellahzy:
donJazzy's kids.

I love how decent Dija dresses.

She no get choice nah....nothing to flaunt there!

I think most guys who have NEVER been in a "serious" relationship before, have a problem with emotional bonding. A lot of guys grew up in very macho and tough social environments where emotional expressions were misconstrued as weakness. They never developed the "emotional communication" skills that are absolutely necessary for meaningful relationships with ladies. These guys probably have no female siblings, went to an all boys boarding school, and never cultivated any serious social contact outside their close circle while in university.


@op- if any of this strikes a chord with u, don't worry cos ur not alone here. Plenty guys go through this. U just have to trust that its ok to let ur guard down sometimes and enjoy a deep emotional connection with an intelligent lady. I bet u your dating experiences would be so much more richer and satisfying. Also don't be too anxious abt marriage no matter how old u think u are. U don't need dat kind of pressure, trust me. Hope this helps some.

Hi SlimBrawnie, haven't heard back frm u. I replied ur email wit my fone num so we can chat more on whatsapp. Hope u saw it. Lemme know if I shuld send it agn. Really looking forward to dat conversation...tanx.