₦airaland Forum

Reex12:
guy mcslize pls keep quiet your posts irritate me with your ojuelegba view

youve never left the shores of nigeria neither have you experienced racism, yet you think its black and white,confidence and shyness
you cant force yourself on someone who doesnt want you.

If you take a trip to russia you would understand better, your just blabbering

Confident men don't force themselve on others. People force themselves on them.

Have confidence and you will give no bleep about what white think about you. You guys should stop crying like babies for racism. The tribalism you experience here in your own country isn't it more than racism?

MantisShrimp:
Typical thing a liar will say. You were talking about gbola and other childish things when everybody were having a serious mature conversation. I should have known you wont have anything better than that to contribute. Bye.

@Mcslize he has given you the answer you need.

Hehehe do you usually write a CV when approaching the opposite sex? The context of the thread is loneliness. Which implies not having someone to talk to.

Are you married, if you are not, do you have a girlfriend? How did you approach her? Did you by any chance woo your woman? Who did it for you? Did you preach the gospel to her or sweet talked her?

How were you able to achieve that if you didn't talk to her?

Your answers to those will highly be wwlcomed.

Dybala11:
As much as approaching people the right way is important, don't you think that becoming friends/reciprocating friendship is a two-way thing?
Or your own idea of friendship is only dependent on you alone?

My point is if one person does not reciprocate your gesture, move on to the next. I don't deal with people that don't reciprocate ftiendship. I simply move on to the next.

Having talked to so many people, I discovered no two persons are the same.

I am the type that don't use another man situation to judge another.

If a girl turn me down today, I see it as nothing cuz I have met so many of them. I won't use that to judge the next girl I will meet simply because one turned me down. That's how I operate.

I ask someone for something and he turned me down. Oh I will start feeling bad and all that. I don't do that. That's low self esteem. I don't cry like a baby over people opinions.

If I talk to a lady who is having a bad day and she flared up at me, I will simply say sorry madam, try resolve whatever you are experiencing, the lord is your strength and I will move on. I won't dwell on that and prevent myself from talking to the next girl I fancy.

At this juncture, I believe you get my point.

Don't give a bleep about how people respond to you when you approach them being negative or positive. And trust me, I get more positive replies than negative ones.

A simple "oh damn! is this the figure 8 I have been hearing about for years or figure 9? has landed me a babe in the past.

That's how simple my approach are. Not every lady will gingle over that but majority do.

An approach need not be complicated especially when it involves a lady you fancy. Mind you, we talking about loneliness. Don't forget the title of the thread. Meaning we are dealings with the opposite sex in this context.

So you are the girl they have been telling me that will born me triplets eh? I have caught u today Has landed me a babe too. The last babe I dated. Those are the simple things I utter to ladies and strike a convo.

I don't complicate things for myself. And they all reciprocate.

I rest my case.

Dybala11:
But a lot of people living abroad also supported his claim, or do you think that their views don't count?
Of course there may be exceptions, but you can't just dismiss a claim that some Nigerians living abroad are making based on your own assumptions without concrete fact, what you're doing is called "fallacy". The guy's argument has more credibility compared to yours cos he gave both a supposed experiential proof and a research proof, while yours is based solely on your belief and personal hypothesis without proof. All through your argument, only one person living abroad have supported your assertion while others said otherwise.
How do you expect me to take your assumptions concerning how people live their lives abroad to be true when you've never been there and majority of those living there that contributed to this argument said otherwise, is that normal sir?
Anyway, maybe just maybe they're all wrong and you're the only one that is right?

I approach women on a daily basis that's why I debunked his claim.

His claim is solely based on the fact that people keep to themselves over there and I debunked it that even at that, that shouldn't stop one from reaching out to people. Walking past someone and saying hi is not a crime.

If I stop reaching out to people simply because I believe they won't talk to me if I say hi to them, don't you think that's a mere generalisation? Mind you, are all whites created the same? Do they have the same mind? Are they created with the same dealings and doings?

If I reach out to one and she refuses to reply me, that shouldn't stop me from reaching out to another. Being put off by the doings of one person and making a generalisation off it is like living in denials.

If we go by his claim, it shows that all whites are created the same. Will you say they are all created with same dealings and doings irrespective of how each individual relates with others?

MantisShrimp:
Believe that guy at your own peril. His statement is just full of exaggerations and ridiculous assumptions. Ask him the country and area he stays and see if anyone else living there will support his claims that is if he is even abroad.

I believe the guy. Knowing how to approach people is an individual something. If someone can't do it, it doesn't mean another can't. It is a matter of having self confidence and not giving a bleep about the reply a lady gives you.

Dybala11:
I see your tactics, it's easy to sit behind your keyboard in Nigeria and type whatever you like. It's easy to make assumptions on the cultural and behavioral set up of the whites even without having a direct contact with any of them. A guy who claims that he's living with those people have given you both a first hand and research proof of what is happening there and all you can do is dismiss his whole argument however factual it seems with just mere assumptions from your thought. Typical Nigerian, I do that too at times though so I understand quite well.

And another guy debunked his claim. Didn't you see it? A guy living abroad who lives in that same abroad has debunked that stereotype claim. That's why I said it is an individual something. Not everyone is good with women. When they can't woo or simply say hi to a woman, they write themselves off and heap the blame on white girls hate black guys. They don't do black guys. Who said so? That person simply sucks with women or lack self confidence.

In that same abroad,we have lots of pick up artists (PUA) who woo women on a daily basis.

Let's stop putting the blame on white girls not giving black guys attention.

havilla:
anyone that has lived abroad even for a year would know that you dont live abroad, I would advice you stop talking too much about things you know nothing about and wait to experience it yourself. Approaching a white girl when she is listening to music isnt wise as most people with their earphones abroad dont even want to be approached, you would look like a weirdo and freak of nature. Just keep quiet.

Taaaah! I don't live abroad but stop looking down on yourself before the whites.

Most of you are simply having low self esteem. Knowing how to talk to people is not a hard thing to do. There is a way you talk to someone, she will definitely give a positive feedback. Weirdo you said? Who gives a bleep? That's the condemnations I mentioned earlier. You already condemned yourself that the person you want to talk to won't answer you politely.

It's more like applying for a job and just before you are invited, you already condemned yourself as not fit for the job. That's low self esteem. Why not make an attempt first before writing yourself off?

It is the same mindset that is preventing many from reaching out to people. You feel someone will take you as weirdo just by saying Hi or reaching out to them. Confident men don't give a fvck about the reply ladies give them.

As far as I am just being myself, how a lady view a man doesn't matter to a man who knows what he is doing.

Weirdo indeed!

Cocao:
You sound so ignorant. It is a pain reading your comments.

No it's just that you are just too biased seeing the truth in my comments.

Carrying your Nigeria mentality abroad where you always expect men to approach you won't help you.

Get out of your comfort zone and approach a man to prevent you from being in loneliness. How hard is that?

Randy91:
You just summed it up...INFERIORITY COMPLEX and Lacking confidence !

Since i migrated, first babe(Mexican) got her through a get together party...She has big yansh and you know MOST white dudes are scared of BIG YANSH because of the size of their GBOLA

Second Gf(white too with big yansh), got her when i visited a friend,,she stays in my friend neighorhood..

D truth is i have NEVER seen a Naija man in my region suffering LONELINESS...most of them are into serious relationships with oyibo babes

Randy91 nice one

stubbornman aka neurosci do you see this. This is someone living abroad. I told you it's your fault that you ain't approaching white babes.

Feeling inferior or feeling dreaded of ladies who are humans like you with the " how will she react" is a mere lack of confidence.

If you are not good at talking to women due to low self esteem, dine with friends that are good at it so you learn from them.

Black men seem sexy to whites girl. They believe they have big below if you know what I meant. You don't even need to have sexy body to woo a woman. Just get sweet mouth and you can make any woman giggling and laughing her ass out.

And once you are able to pull out that smile, and keep things spontaneous, she won't mind being your gf right there and right at that spot.

stubbornman:
Guy when you get abroad you can really contribute to this conversation ,don't just sit in your house in Nigeria and form scope master.

Don't reply with a different account. I know it's you Neurosci.

You simply scared of talking to white girls maybe that's why.

It's nobody fault. Try and reach out to people irrespective of their color. Low self esteem is the greatest disease of the black race.

There are many threads here on Nairaland that will teach you how to talk to girls. E.g Hardon thread. Then if you don't want to be a woman wrapper, check out Glycolysis thread. They are all insightful. Stop being scared of talking to white girls. They won't bite you.

neurosci:
If you read every one of my post carefully, you will know I never said Nigerians/black men don't date white girls. But anyway, let's forget about this and move onto something more productive.

If you believe that black guys date white girls then you will agree with me that they did that simply by talking to those girls. You can't keep mute and expect to have a good woman. In the process of talking to women of all sort, you will meet the one that suits you.


Why not give it a try? Try and talk to a white girl every forthnight. Don't be concerned about rejection. Just do it for fun.

Exchanging pleasantries with a girl in the bus won't take a thing off you. So pay less attention to how she will react.

I don't think a white girl will slap or react badly simply by asking her what song she is listening to when catching the bus or train. That's how black guys land white girls as gfs.

You must learn to talk to someone. It's not a sin to talk. Who give a fvck about how she will look at me?

The issue is that most guys outrightly condemn themselves even before they utter a word to a girl.

They feel a girl will react badly and the girl will look down on them and all of those unncessary condemnations.

Not so many white girls are as intelligent as blacks. Some don't even know anything aside their countries. So, why should a black guy feel intimidated approaching white girls.

You killed no one by doing that. You are simply expanding your social circle.

neurosci:
Man, I'm done with this. Get here, do stuff then message me back. Don't tell me about YouTube.

There are still guys here who are dating white girls. White girls are friendly than our black ladies.

A white girl will be so willing to help you out than your fellow black girl. Don't tell me you don't know any of your friend who is dating a white girl if you live abroad.

neurosci:
Did you answer my question at all? Have you lived abroad? The US or Canada specifically. If you have not, leave this topic for those who have. When you get there, try the things you said and then come back to tell me how it went.

What you don't understand is that what you're describing above is more of a cultural thing as opposed to a mere skill. Have you ever wondered why people don't cold approach the opposite sex in the streets here like they do in Nigeria? Have you ever entered a public bus or train here and seen how people are quiet, heads locked down on their phones? Why do you think dating apps are the main means of finding relationships here as opposed to just walking up to strangers?

Your writing shows you've never been here, otherwise you would not have said what you said regarding a white girl smiling at you. When a white girl smiles at you, take it seriously at your own peril.

Innocently naughty. Smh

Must I live abroad before I understand how to approach women? Approaching women is a skill and many sucks at it. We watch guys doing cold approach on YouTube, real life and I never see where a white girl act so mean and all that.

If you can't approach ladies one on one and only resort only to dating apps, how will you boost your self confidence as a man?

Even on a dating app, it takes a man who understands women to pull lots of them out of their shells. The moment you make a woman feels she is above you, you've defeated the whole purpose of approaching such a woman.

You chatting with a lady and you are being all official do you think she will reason you?

Stop making ladies feel on high heel. That's the point. It doesn't take alot to make a woman giggles. The moment you start looking down on yourself before any lady, she is gone.

Women love confident men. White women are still very lenient to approach. I don't know your experience but it seems you are not good with women from the look of things.

neurosci:
Before you underestimate what childofthelord is saying here, my question to you is, have you ever lived abroad? I'm sure by the time you ask three girls for their numbers here, white girls specifically since they're the majority, no one will teach you before you stop doing that when you see how much of a nuisance they consider you to be. You think they're the same as Nigerian girls, right? Ok!

Lol not for a guy like me. Before you meet a girl, stop making her feel like she is the price. Consider yourself a high value man, and you will have no issue talking to any girl being white or black.

And mind you, talking to a girl is a skill. If you are humorous, innocently naughty, you won't have issue talking to ladies. If our black girls can be so mean and men still talk to them, how much more of friendly white girls.

A white girl can just walk passed you and smile at you. How many of our ladies here do that?

That smile alone is an ice breaker if you know what I meant.

Knowing how to handle ladies is a universal skill. It is not for everyone and not for guys that have low self esteem.

ednut1:
their sense of entitlement is sickening. Because men toast u every where or make remarks in Nigeria they think its normal. Abeg make dem self go toast men or enter tinder . They complain of loneliness but they will be on dating apps looking for only Nigerians men, Christian and well to do. In an already small pool o. Jokers

Lol, that entitlement part is something ladies really need to look into. Once you ask a Nigeria girl out, she will start pouring all her problems on you. That's very bad.

They won't think of how they can support a guy but know only how to take from a guy.

That's guys should put sentiment aside when choosing a life partner.

Dating a liability will drill a big hole on a guy's pocket let alone choosing such as a lifetime partner.

I laugh when I see ladies praying God bless my future husband with wealth. And I ask myself, will it be bad if God bless them for their husbands?

Some are just too lazy. And their only hope is marrying a rich guy which doesn't work these days. Rich guys are now looking for rich girls. So no one will use the other.

79733139:
Most of them didn't develop their social skills. They basically don't know how to make friends and they don't know how to approach (and take rejections) the opposite sex.

In Nigeria, their social life was structured and for guys, money might have played a big issue in dating. However, in western countries, you need to be proactive about your social life and having money doesn't give you a big edge when it comes to dating.

We also have Nigerian females who believe women shouldn't try and approach a guy to spark his interest.

Exactly. Here in Nigeria, that notion of only guys should approach ladies had been inbuilt in most ladies. The kind of attention our women get here they don't get that once they get to the west world. Guys hardly approach ladies over there. It is mind your business lifestyle. All their lives, most of our ladies haven't approached a guy. They carry same mindset abroad hoping for men to be rushing them. When that is not forth coming, they go into depression comparing Nigeria to abroad.

Some times I approach ladies just for the fun of it. I don't think there is any lady I can't approach. People are scared of rejection and scared of being turned down when trying to socialise with the opposite sex. Who truly cares if a lady turn me down or not.

I walked up to a lady striked a convo, and requested her number, she simply said she just wanted to be left alone. That she doesn't want any man in her life oh my God just for asking of number. I simply told her ok have a nice day.

If I were some persons, I won't approach ladies again due to that rejection. The next day I saw another lady and I striked a convo as usual and boom she responded well, got her number and walked away.

People should learn how to approach and socialize. If you look deeply, you will discover the issue is not the society but them.

You are wasting your time if you are emtionally being attached to ladies.

Na wa o. The country is really hard. That's why I hate salary. They will slave you and pay you peanut.

How can one survive with 15k?

Kirkman:
Bros how you want take do am now? It's not gonna be easy for your girl cos getting a serious good guy nowadays is hard, where will she start from and with whom?

That's why I am still being lenient with her. If it is to be ladies they won't care how the guy will feel. But here I am considering how she will feel.

A lady will break up with a guy without considering how the guy will feel. They are heartless, but when the coin is turned the other way round, the guy will think about it day and night how the girl will feel if he breaks up with her.

Guys are more sympathetic than ladies. When you love a girl that's when they will Bleep you up. But when you don't love them, that's when they will treat you like a king.

Life no balance at all.

Eastcaostboy:
you are the only one that would answer yourself that question. The earlier the better

My Dad once advised me, when it comes to marriage, remove every form of sentiment. Marriage is different from relationship. So my answer is I am just in for the short time. But now she is making it looks like I am her final bus stop. I really don't want to keep her in the dark but the same time I don't want it seems like I am a heart breaker.

I find it hard breaking girls hearts. I want the relationship to die on its own. But how do I do that? If I snub her, it will look like I am turning a monster. Just imagine not replying her or picking her calls. I will feel like a bad person definitely.

[quote author=Ronin1post=99577634]60k is less than $150 and you'll live off of that monthly? won't you have kids? [/quote]You're right. That's about $135 at the rate of N450/$1.

Salary in this country is really low couple with the low value currency. But it's still better than being jobless.

IjawAboki007:
If you think time is not on your side
Break up with him and leave. No stress!

I really wish the girl I am dating right now will break up with me. I don't know where the relationship is heading.

And she has been reminding me she doesn't want to experience another heart break. I don't know what she meant by that. Hope she is not thinking I am her final bus stop?

AffSynergy:
It's quite unfortunate that we don't let good things thrive in this part of the world.

After 2 attempts at continuing with updating this thread with my challenge (by the way, it was a success), both the mods or the bots have made sure that nothing fruitful comes out of this.

Having been banned twice consecutively, it is with utter dismay that I will not be continuing this thread.
However, I have set up my site were I have dropped the entire info regarding this challenge and the outcome. Feel free to check it out.

Thanks for your understanding

Nice thread. Pls which VPN are you using to access your account and how much are you paying for it?

Henrymorre:


I will try to make this story very short.

So I've always loved my babe, buy her stuffs, gives her money, take her out, etc. So tomorrow is her birthday, and she has a very bad hair. We where talking over on phone yesterday, and she asked me to send her money to make her hair, plus she also said she doesn't have money to do her bday, and wants me to help her on it. Well, I wanted to help her do her bday shaa, just to make her happy, but I can't carry all the responsibilities alone, so I said no to her getting money to do her hair. I told her to make her hair by herself or wear a wig, since I will be ,

Paying for hotel
Buying the cakes
Buying the drinks
Buying the meat
Calling DJ to play song for her and her friends
Plus giving her a gift..

She started acting all up, that she will do the bday with her friends that she doesn't need me in it anymore, that her friend will make her hair for free blah blah, and she will sleep over at her friends place. Etc

So guys the question, is this lady really a wife material? Or someone who is just there to eat money and go?

Did I over react?

Why do guys always use money to buy girls' love? Do you think that girl loves you? You've already used money to spoil her from the beginning. Without that, she will leave you. That's the simple fact.

I always warn guys to stop spending unnecessarily on girls they are dating. That doesn't signify love. She will only see you as her ATM. How do you know she loves you when you always spend on her?

See how she is behaving already for declining her request. Meaning she is just in for the money.

The girl I am dating right now, I have never spent a dime on her except Tfare of 1500 I gave her when she visited. 2 months relationship. I have never paid for hair, buy pan cake, take her for shopping. But still, she still finish me with calls, baby, honey, and the lots of pet names calling.

All those usual spending guys spend on their babes, I don't do all that. Cuz I see it as using money to sustain such relationship. Relationship should be natural not based on what she is benefiting from you.

Ask yourself, if you stop spending on her today, will she still be with you? Already she is giving you attitude. And that answer the question.

Don't use money to buy girl love. Let her love you naturally even without spending on her. That's only when you know if a girl truly loves you.

Viknat:
Before I married, my father said though it will be difficult to marry from home like our parents home, but I should never marry from poor home

My Dad also advised me on this last year. He said my son, any relationship you are in pls do not make marriage promises. Never promise any lady with marriage.

And if you want to marry, never marry a liability.

That advised had been ringing in my ear for months now.

authority2006:
That doesn't prove anything now. They're runs girls but they are still women. And men still patronise them. What does that prove actually?

It proves that once you meet them you will keep meeting them. Majorly to get men addicted for the love of pusssy. Why are the men patronising them? It is an addictive spirit.

Escabado:
This is One month into our relationship and she wants me to buy a new phone for her. She is not a good digger because her ex boyfriend gave her Brand New infinix smart 5 but she refused to collect it. She do spend some little little money on me but we have not had s.e x . I do spend money on her too . Now the issue is that I don't want to do something I will regret because Nigerian girls can never be trusted. she prefers I call her with her sisters number but I'm getting tired of calling her from someone else phone and I don't want to buy her any new phone to avoid falling mugu . The whole thing is getting me tired in the relationship . Guys advice me on what to do

Fear girls. Don't be naive.

Manipulation spotted. Were you there when the ex was giving her a phone? She cooked that up to manipulate you and you are already falling for it.

Most things ladies say about their exes are lies. They will tell you they are not like other girls. Don't fall for it. They are not the demanding type. Mere typical words. I am not like other girls. Ahaaaa! a naive guy who haven't met with lots of girls with limited experience will definitely fall for all those heavy trailer loaded lies.

I do smile sheepishly when I hear lies like these.

Watch this zfancy true life experience video. You will learn something from it. A guy met a lady and from the beginning, the guy told her he was not interested in anything relationship due to how ladies of this era only go after material things and jump from guys to guys. But the lady tried to convince him that she was different. That she was not like other girls. Unknown to the guy she was a typical gold digger. She ended up manipulating the guy into believing that she was a good girl.

Along the line, the guy started to fall in love with her and gradually completely fell in love to the extent of introducing her to her family, taking her for shopping and later on the girl started demanding money from him. She asked the guy for N200,000.

So the guy with the mindset of this was my girlfriend sent this girl 2 million naira.

Guess what the girl did. She blocked the guy's number both on calls and WhatsApp after receiving the money. And for 2 good months the guy couldn't reach her.

So, the guy set her up by conniving with one of his guys who is a player and who is very good with girls to go contact the girl and toast the girl. He gave him the girl's number to carry out the game.

And guess what? She fell for it. See how the girl was begging when she finally found out that the guy she blocked months ago was the one behind the set up.

Watch it here to learn. Fear girls.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pUScJEZvVI

lefulefu:
hahhahaha u know the works
most ladies u see in church who dont wear makeup and wearing long flowing gowns and be forming speaking in tongues in most cases are pretenders looking to ensnare any naive man who believes thats what it takes to be a good girl
as soon as they get married married to the man they show their true colour and go back to their wild ways
some even have affairs with their pastors or high ranking officials in the church
though most guys have wise up to the game but very few foolish ones still fall for the format

Exactly. That's why I won't advice anyone who is searching for a life partner to make church the first spot to find a wife.

Church shouldn't be the number spot to find wife.

lefulefu:
lol thank God u did not mention church among the places to get a good girl

Lol, I excluded church cuz I know lots of pretenders are there.

A girl who has wasted her youthful age away frolicking in her early years and realised there is no time on her side can immediately turn to a regular church goer and attending all the services just to portray herself as a good girl.

Some naive men normally fall for such girls. When they see them attending all service, dressing like deeper life, a man who doesn't know much about ladies antics will surely fall for such a pretense and foolishly ask her hands in marriage. Unknown to him, she is a retired love peddler.

shortgun:
You guys will just come online and type nonsense.
How many girls have u even met in your life?
How many have u seen their waist?
How many took you to where they " spiritually fortified"
the beads and chains?
Do you even know what kayanmata is? do you know the meaning in English?
Have you ever heard of Kayanmaza?...do you know what it is?

All the girls I've dated had beads....if I met her without them I will buy for her, my girl now have beads, leg chain and nose piecing...Iove her her like that, I love the beads on her waist.
she's the kind of girl you can only see in your fantasy.
Why am I still alive and Rich? Why didn't the voodoo in the beads killed me long ago? or made me poor.

Answer me oo,

Only irresponsible ladies pierce their nose. Just say you only go after slay Queens. Why haven't you married anyone of those girls as they are your type of girls or are u not due for marriage?

Take a girl who has 3 piercing on her ear, and a nose ring with leg chains to your people and introduce her that's the girl you've seen to marry if your people won't caution you.

When we talk of diabolism, it doesn't mean they will kill you. There are different ways to make someone life miserable even with all the money you have.

Some are met to cause a man to be addicted to sex. You see yourself always hooking up with call girls wasting away your semen. You may have money but may have one addiction you can never stop. You just can't stop jumping from one girl to another. To you, that may seem normal and usual to you but heck no. The more partners you get intimate with, the more bad negative energy you attract to yourself. Some persons carry negative energy u don't know?

And mind you, any girl you meet, have met countless of other guys. They distribute whatever they attracted from others to those they end up having intimacy with.

Look at yourself very well,there must be one terrible addiction you may be battling with right now even with the money you have. Do u see that as normal?

You find yourself making money but end up squandering it on girls. You may see that as enjoyment but heck no, that's bad negative energy right there.

So, don't jump into disputing things like this when you yourself know we live in a very terrible world.