Enoquin: Nna, I am truly scared for this generation oh. It would have been downright funny, if it isn't disheartening that most people have poor comprehension issues. Some are even trying to say the sarcasm wasn't 'funny'. The future is worrisome as I see no solution in sight. Please, Ali Baba didn't say the girls' pay were peanuts in a way intended to insult their efforts or the protest.
Make I help una summarise wetin im talk: Im say our sinators and ministas dem go dey waka go obodo oyibo no do anything but go still come collect plenty money on top, meanwhile pipu wey dey do the real work go dey suffer to collect money wey no even reach anything (hence the term 'peanuts') wen dem wan compare am. Im dey talk say our government get poor attitude for pipu wey dey bring glory to the contri...im come use Okwaraji wey die as example.
Sarcasm is not intended to be funny like a joke (so don't pity or mock him if you didn't laugh). Those who understand sarcasm well (let me speak for myself) feel a kind of pleasure that cannot be explained, it's like stumbling on a secret where only few understand. And if we laugh, it is not because a sarcastic piece was funny, it is because of the sheer 'pleasure' we get from reading subtle or intelligent insults.
Okay, I am rambling...bye
Pls... DM me, I need to send you #1,000 recharge worth of your preferred network. You intelligently anatomize the whole write up whilst relaying my delectation from the intelligent satire. I've never been so uniformly disappointed as I have tonight. Even the strong and mighty of Nairaland fell tonight. #WhatAShame
Here is a jobless boy who couldn't identify sarcasm until he was criticized to submission. To think ishilove is crushing on this clown makes me wonder the kind of brain women of this generation possess. Shame
And when we ask them what are they bringing to the table they think it's just a mere statement to ridicule the women folks #Spits
tifevirtue: For all you that claim this is sarcasm. Its wrong. You can't be sarcastic about people with pains. And every line was rubbing the pain on them. The sarcasm was wrongly constructed. This is why most people didn't get it. He was trying to be sarcastic there and funny but trying to be funny with a serious matter throws all the joke away. He is no king of comedy...... HE CREATES EXPENSIVE JOKE...... There are indeed poor Nigerian graduates.
Emancipate yourself from the shackles of shallowness
erenma24: It's people like this that we don't need in dis country, every1 has a brain but only few use it. many are literates but few are smart.
You are a sheer example of congenital beauty without brains. Total oxymoron you confidently called yourself out. Stating : you're not needed in this country, you have a brain but you don't use it, you are literate but belong to the retård phylum.
room089: See wetin MMM freezing of people's account cause?
It didn't only freeze their account. It froze their brains like liquid Nitrogen.
I swear on everything good that I only had to read that once to catch the drift... It only took me half way through the read.
I have never been so disappointed in anyone as much as I have tonight with those who couldn't decipher the nerve wrenching sarcasm.
It's simultaneously annoying and painful that this ilk of slow people are regarded as leaders of tomorrow. This explains why our haggard polithiefians won't relinquish power to the youthful generation. Once again, we've let them get another 1up on us. #IWeep
couliss: so God made woman in which image ? so because God made man in his own likeness it means a man is better than a woman remember there is a man in the word WoMAN once again I AM EQUAL WITH A MAN.
Until I hear of female Angels, only then will I consider a WOman my equal.
As for the man in WOman... It's actually the other way round cos since you came into existence, you've been the WOE in our MAN
Odinaka Ali, a 25 year old woman from Ezilo, in Ishielu Local Goverment of Area of Ebonyi state has been arrested for trying to sell her three children.
Reminds me of that song; Reminisce ft Olamide - industreet ==>
"... And my Ibo sense got them calling me Odinaka,I dey calcufast, Me I no dey calculate. Do the thing strong thing, lo je kin ejaculąte... "
ayesco202: Good day fellow nairalanders. Many a time I come across posts where these words 'advice' and 'advise' are used interchangeably . For instance, someone might want to say 'I need your advice' and we see something like 'I need your advise' which is wrong. 'Please advice me' instead of 'Please advise me'. Now the thing is, the word 'advice' is a noun and does not take 'to' modal auxiliaries such as will, would, may, can etc,. Has/have/had cannot also come before it, eg, my advice for you is this, work hard. NOT My advise for you is this, work hard. Advise is a verb which can admit 'to' and the auxiliary verbs above before it eg, I wish to advise you/I may advise you/I will advise you to... So advice seekers need to take note of these things so that we can as well, advise you. Peace.
I tell people, English is way harder than Mathematics. But, I will take English seriously when someone can explain this ==>
FakoMaybach1: Bros he meant he does not believe the snake's venom can kill an elephant...so pictures of the snake killing an elephant or we dont believe it
That's a fact, rattle snake forewarnes you before getting to where it's curled up by rattling it's tail. A black mamba doesn't...it strikes ferociously. The only warning it gives is showing its inky black mouth but that's not alertive as the rattle snake.
Do you know you can tell how old a rattle snake is by the number of rattles on its tale.
Gudiza: ....I know you didn't write it yourself OP but, this is just one I find erroneous...
Snakes are cold blooded, they don't do well in temperate region. Reason you see them crawl up to house is for warmth or the abundant rodent, the infrared sensor on them helps them detect heat signature.
Oreoo: op dah one u said about cobra snake killing elephants is not true..not true pls ..elephants do nt havr snake antivenom lik swines and moongoose but a single cobra bite would do harm to it..its just lik u sewing pin piercing you on ur skin to them elephants ..may b lik 15+ cobras stand a chance wit continuous bites to kill a full grown elephants ..U have tries op but dont mislead us wrongly ..i drop my pen
Oreoo: The world’s longest venomous snake is the king cobra from Asia. It can grow up to 18 feet, rear almost as high as a person, growl loudly, and inject enough venom to kill an elephant. --dis is a damn lie!!..ntin y'all r gonna say dat il make me blive dis..an elephant?
Explorers: 36. The most deadly snakes found in Australia include Brown Snakes, Copperheads, Death Adders, Red-Bellied Black Snakes, Taipan Snakes and Tiger Snakes.
37. The King Cobra is the largest of all venomous snakes, and actually eats other snakes.
Human victims may stop breathing just 30 minutes after being bitten by a cobra.
The world’s longest venomous snake is the king cobra from Asia. It can grow up to 18 feet, rear almost as high as a person, growl loudly, and inject enough venom to kill an elephant.
The king cobra is thought to be one of the most intelligent of all snakes. Additionally, unlike most snakes, who do not care for their young, king cobras are careful parents who defend and protect their eggs from enemies.
in addition... The king Cobra can grow up to 24ft (there's a record for that), it's the only snake specie that makes a nest (two layer type) for its eggs and both parents take turn to guard it.
Because the king Cobra is notorious for its taste for snake meal, it instinctively leaves the nest prior to when it's eggs will hatch, what better way to avoid eaten your own offspring.
The male king Cobras are significantly larger than its female counterpart...speaks volume of the name "King Cobra" right!
The king Cobras major meal are snakes and favorites are young python and rat snakes. However...king Cobras hardly engage in a duel with another king.
They are impervious to all snake venom except their own.
The King Cobra is the most intelligent of the snake specie.
Sexytemi: To All Ladies Out There, I Say Please Have A Side Boyfriend!
After reading toke makinwa's book "on becoming" I'm of the idea that if toke had had a back up plan, a guy she could count on if her boyfriend at that time maje(later ex husband) was in his usual act of cheating then maybe he would have taken her serious and respected her more..
I've been there where I gave my all into a relationship and was very loyal to my guy and yet after 5yrs of dating he decided I wasn't good enough for him, and left me stranded, it wasn't funny because I saw the signs but like every other girl in love, I ignored the signs and also ignored guys that would or might have made me more happier than he ever made me. .
Polyestar: You're right, that's not King Cobra but the Eastern Indigo. I just confirmed from other sources before replying you. But I still have proof that King Cobras prey on python. See the amateur clip below.
I never doubted they do, king Cobra are notorious for preying on snakes especially young python and rat snakes. They're the only snake that makes a nest for their eggs.
Geraldyne: m suprised ma topic made fp afta hw mani months...av left d relationship tho..nd 4 those still judgin abt d prayin tin..continue
Ain't judging girl...thing is you just broke the Niggas heart. He just got a high libido and it's just really intense when you the only one he seeing with a high level of attraction. He seems pretty idle, hence more time together for the third leg to be opinionated.
However...one of my favorite song/most played track ==>
Polyestar: According to Wikipedia, they can only prey on small pythons but I can give you a video link of a King Cobra eating a full-grown python. http://www.downvids.net/king-cobra-vs-python-one-gets-eaten--454306.html The largest python in record, in terms of weight and size, is the Burmese Python. Although the Reticulated Python and King Cobra are longer. It's the second largest snake after the Green Anaconda.
the video is a false representation of what you think it is. That's not a king Cobra and neither the other a python.
That's an eastern Indigo snake, it is non venomous, it is noted as the longest snake native in the United states. The swallowed snake is a Viper, notice how it move sideways. Note: Indigo snakes are impervious to poison hence they swallow prey snakes alive
Ifakiland: You see ur life? So wat did u gain been a faithful bf now? Ur gf was actually double dating while u were dere wasting money on her. Be a player and damage Deir lives, u sed no, now see wat a biitch has caused u! I'm sure uve learnt ur lessons....never trust a gal, fork her and go...dey will eventually leave u.
john1964: Hi guys I know nairaland ain't the perfect Place to come asking for advice but I have no one to confide to, am this kinda person that find it hard sharing personal issues with someone I know, When I read people write about their personal love life issues I find it very funny sha..lol..
Not knowing I'll one day face mine and be forced to share it. Been dating this girl for 3 years now am in the university, 400L while she's in her 300L presently, she's always cared and loved me undoubtedly since day 1, always had back in school both financially and others too and we've always had this plan for a future together, coz I strongly believe and know our love was real. The bond we had was just so strong, suddenly I had an issue with school which brought me back though.
Sadly Had to start all over from 100L it hurts me so much, though all the time have been going through this dilemma, she's always tried encouraging me and pushed me not to give up on my dream.
I was almost thinking so negative when I had this school ish, thought about killing myself thinking the world was over. But this lady stood by me and never gave up on me and convinced me that killing my self wouldn't help matters (I was really a mess then, like a HUGE mess) didn't go out much, had to stay in school a whole year preparing all over again for jamb nd all that, tho still attending lectures.
Now, when I had this issue that was were my dreams started shattering, our future wasn't looking all bright anymore because now am starting all over again, when I'll be in my 100L she'll be in her 300L and on and on like that..
It really broke my heart, at some point she believes in me and tries to convince me things would be better and I'll definitely scale through, But most times there's just this little doubts that comes in, You Ladies are prone to marry early (and she's very cute) which is actually a huge A+, men have always been coming asking for her hand in marriage and she has always declined them.. But she ain't getting any younger, and has to get married someday, sadly she told me yesterday she really do love me so much and has always had my back always and supported me always and which is so true that she has just decided to give me some lil break so I can try sorting my self out and balancing my life and she has decided to agree to one of her suitors(the guy is quite close to her family/ he's financially stable too tho the guy has a lil kid sha I guess his a single dad) coz she's always told me about ppl asking for her hand in marriage, though they ain't getting married now, but at least she wants to face him, instead of pushing away all her suitors and in the future wen she graduates and am Still in school, it might not be easy for me to be financially stable easily, tho she begged me that Pls hope I wouldn't paint her as a bad person coz she really tried for me.
I've just been really down since she told me this and it's really affecting me so much tho what she says is sadly the truth, Have just really built my life around her and she's just the only one I confined to in school when I have issues (coz am really this typa person who don't flows and share things easily with anyone, I kinda hv trust issues) don't really know how I'll cope when Am back to school, we leave close to each other in school, and she still really wants to be friends with me and wants to always support me too. Don't really know what to do right now I really do love her so much because she's an amazing person who has just been by my side through really hard times in school, it wont be easy starting Just as friends right now, I really do have a mild heart.
Wish I could rewind the hands of the clock and correct the mistake I made that made me start all over again.. It's just really sad
Pls if I made a mistake with my typing, don't attack me.. Just really down now
henrydadon: who Peugeot help abeg..that mercedes benz is goal any time any day..have always dream of owning one of those..aremogucci the famous yahoo boy own one of these s - class series
ain't nothing like a benz...i believe Mercedes-Benz have got some UFO locked up secretly cos their designs are out of this planet
Joy1706: Hahahhaa! You guys marry oloshos every time. It did not start today. There are always ways to tighten up the place. How you go take know? Yeah I'm a registered olosho with CAC. You feel good now? Hahahahaha
Celebrities › Re: Ali Baba Reacts To Super Falcons' Protest Over Unpaid Allowances by modsRbastard: 1:45am On Dec 15, 2016
you confidently called yourself out. Stating : you're not needed in this country, you have a brain but you don't use it, you are literate but belong to the retård phylum.
Nna, I am truly scared for this generation oh. It would have been downright funny, if it isn't disheartening that most people have poor comprehension issues. Some are even trying to say the sarcasm wasn't 'funny'. The future is worrisome as I see no solution in sight. Please, Ali Baba didn't say the girls' pay were peanuts in a way intended to insult their efforts or the protest. 
?