₦airaland Forum

my account MrBrownJay was deleted by someone who i still dont know who that was. could have been someone who had access to my pc but, at the time i received a BS email from NL spammers, and the next day my account was gone. never was sure who did it and couldnt be bothered to email Seun etc. so i logged into the secondary account i had, MRBrownJ (used whenever i was banned), to see if someone was using the 1st one or not, but it wasnt so i just let it slide as i thought it may come back eventually. after a few months, decided to use the secondary one, although i'd rather have MrBrownJay back.

@OP
- what is your "dh" complaining about exactly?
- what were you doing before, that you dont do any longer?
- if you are not turned on any longer, what does he do differently to try to get some groove back?
- do you actually think you can do the same routine for years and still get the same stimulation level?
- how long have you guys been doing the same old routine?
- can you get stimulated on your own, and if yes what goes through your mind then?
- have you ever been honest to your "dh"about your desires fantasies?

there is a thin line between love and insanity, dying for love is way passed beyond insanity!

what does anyone expect from laws in crazy countries such as Saudia Arabia or Iran?!

the OP has been listening to much of ABBA, and it got to his head.

qbd2:
Hmm, I just don't think real families will b dis selfish. Of course mothers may find it hard to understand ur point but siblings as well? Probably they weren't really close even in deir childhood/pre fame years

money will reveal the true nature of any person out there, whether family, friend or stranger. many dont know the type of family/friends they have until it is too late. it is not unusual to hear people abroad sending money to their direct family in 9ja, to buy land or build homes and they were duped/robbed/conned by these same family members who couldnt handle dealing with such amount of money (however small it may have been).

qbd2:
Hmm, then he nEeds to find out if he's indeed their biological son. Cos no real parent or sibling will treat oine as such. Reminds me of gary coleman from different strokes. He suffered some ordeals from his so called adoptive parents

sadly, when a substantial amount of money is involved, all this sibling/family thingy goes out the door, and people feel entitled. i mean, many African parents believe they deserve to be "repaid" if any of their children make it in life, while they should instead love you unconditionally whether you decide to spend all your wealth on yourself or anything else. if these selfish parents had raised their children well then that should be enough for that child to make the right choices, instead of being blackmailed for it.

qbd2:
Hmm, very sad indeed but he needs to sit them up and speak his mind to them.
Cos something is obviously wrong, I mean its ones famnily that's supposed to have ones back even when others desert one. But its not the case with dis family and it seems smething is fishy somewhere

not all siblings have your back and would love you, some believe they should be rewarded because you have made some money. then other brothers would want the same treatment, then the cousins, uncles, nieces and nephews and suddenly even stranger would want to get help from you ... and you will just become Santa Claus to them all.

sadly he had to put his foot down a long time ago and he didnt, now everybody thinks they are entitled to his wealth. imagine the nonsense saying that he should buy them all a house and pay them a monthly wage, when he bought one of them a house/car/business and instead they rented the house behind his back and threw his half bro out.

ronald4lif:
No, that's not actually my insinuation. I will not knowingly date/marry anyone who's bereft of either of both. The question however is if one is to choose one above the other or one and completely negate the other.

I will be fine with just that attraction and respect than love. Love is deceptive and one can't tell when someone truly loves them until they find themselves in the most harsh and unfavourable conditions of life. A condition that is adversely to what it was before they met each other.

When she respects me, we can have good companionship, rapport, breeds and still enjoy the benefits of love couple. But when respect is lacking, the home will be in disarray.

yeah, the question is still :" would you be with someone who loves you but does not respect you, or vice versa?" and whatever your answer may be, what would be the point of being with such person?

as much as LOVE is not present at 1st when you meet someone, there is an expectation that it will grow. if such expectation is not present then it is not a r/ship but just a bootay call/FWB etc (to each their own). as for RESPECT, a man can only give respect to a woman when she gives him reasons to respect her (and vice versa). therefore respect will depend on your own actions and should come naturally from your partner. if it doesnt then look into yourself or RUN from that person. if any of these two above examples are not present then there is absolutely no reason to date/marry anyone and you might as well be single.

he shouldnt have wrote all of this and instead, since he knows what he has done, should let all of them rot in their misery.

Strongfaze:
Guys its better to be feared than to be loved by a lady. Be her God is all i'm saying. Gbam.

but if you fear someone, you dont open up to them (therefore you will never discover her), you certainly dont respect them and, after a while, that person will despise you rather than care for you. who would want to be in such union, unless they were in this evil r/ship just for social or family pressure/pleasing?

ronald4lif:
Unless it's proven that when a lady loves someone then they eventually respect them that's when when I'll consider love over respect. But I think this is debatable.

However, if that's not the case I'll prefer respect over love. Love is manipulative. I can easily spot a person who respect me than the one who loves me. Love is conditional and can change as one's life situations changes but I think a person who respect you will always do so regardless of the circumstance.

Once there's some attraction I can live happily without love in my marriage. When there's respect we can make good decisions, understands each other, breeds and have a great deal of companionship so love isn't necessary.

bro, are you saying that you would knowingly date/marry someone who loves you but does not respect you (or vice versa)?

1one:
It's worth comparing...We love everything our hearts beat for, whether bought or otherwise. "I love my car" " I love my house". " I love those shoes"... " I love the time I spend with you"....These are all common expressions we make every once and again and the common factor here is love.

yes you are right, but we do love/like each and every of these things "differently". would you say that the love for your pet is the same as the love for your parents? would you love your car as much as you love your wife? LOVE and RESPECT although the same have a different level of intensity, depending on whom it is for. whether it is your parents, your partner or your children, you will/should ultimately love them 10X more than your pet/car or any of these flimsy stuff you have purchased (which you can buy another whenever you feel like it).

So you're suggesting that the love you have for something you bought shouldn't be compared to the love you have for something "for free"? The love is coming from the same heart isn't it? so why shouldn't it be compared

yes, family/marital bond is free and should never be compared to the bond you create after purchasing an object/pet. sadly you are mistaking "like" with LOVE. you like your car and how it looks, you dont love it just like you love your family. just because the word "love" has been misused here shouldnt be a reason to believe that what you feel for your family is equal to how you feel for your dog/car or best food.

1one:
Trust me, even in that question, there's no absolute pick. Some people will prefer their hands, while others will prefer their legs. For someone who is addicted to self- service, which of those options do you think he/she would pick

although many would pick one, that doesnt mean life living without either one of them is proper....it will NEVER be. you will live what is called a HANDICAPPED life, just like this topic where you will live a HANDICAPPED union.

1one:
So lets say you have a dog that you love so much, that's assuming you're into pets...Since you love your dog, would you then say you respect your dog too?

kai bro, did you compare the love/respect of a partner with the love of a dog (aka some pet that you bought)?!

@OP
both are needed and nobody should ever settle for less in any union. that question is like asking:" what is more important, your legs or your arms?" lol!

Kim is the less slutty looking out of the 3, even though all 3 of them look silly trying to get attention.

10..... fish cant drown

lezz:
No son, what you find unable to accept is my assertion that a woman with lots of sexual partners and a man with lots of sexual partners....that the woman will be worse off psychologically and physically. If you DON'T KNOW THIS,then you are not intellectually viable to be here.

what I actually see in you is a confused, rodent with sawdust for brain. The tread you jumped in was a remark being made to another poster. You jumped in like a typical captain-save-a-ho to display a phenomenon your plastic brain couldn't understand.

Your brain power is that of a toddler, and you are way low on testosterone with a chronic gender identity crisis.

Your standard as a man and human is sub par. You are a swamp rodent in a public toilet.
A delusional fool with no value or moral.

A social conformist with no ethical gauge of his own.

A shaft in the wind of uncertainty who couldn't find his feet and bearing.

A social recluse who prefers crumbs to bread.

A broken tomatoes will command more value than you in any society.

You are a man inferior to dogs, both in standard and in taste.

A modern puppet who lacks simple knowledge of female psychology. A dutchebag and a wuzzy who got hooked on the sweet nothings of a courtesan and want to preach us the sermon of prostitution.


We tie your type up in a public square and horse-whip common sense into your brain filled with congealed milk.


You are a biological accident whom circumstances fated to come as a male with an overdose of estrogens.

You belong to the murky waters of the sewage pipe.

Society is better off without you.

You should climb into your coffin and bid the world goodbye.

Your wife is already fvcking a real man because you were too stupid to realize that women will cheat for sex.

Beast of a worthless breed.

When you are way past redemption we troll you off to the trash-can.

Son of a thousand fathers.

bwaaaaaaaaaah! all these insults and yet you have said nothing relevant to this thread. i guess this is what happens when people have absolutely nothing relevant nor intelligent to say regarding the discussion, they start throwing childish insults....... you probably expect me to derail this thread and start throwing insults back at you but i CANT possibly lower myself to your level. have a great evening bro.
i wish you all the best.

lezz:
Be still. you get wet already just by the thought of a kiss.
debates are not for winning or losing. it is about comparisons and seeing the other angles and possibilities, except of course if you are in secondary/tertiary school.

The thread says "how many men is enough bleeping for a lady before she marries off" so we are talking about sex and her marital suitability to her prospective husband. any other reason of unfaithfulness by foolishness, love for money or power can be treated in another thread. stay focused.

do you have mental problems?! YOU are the one who brought cheating issues to this topic with your "lighter note", so if you dont want us to debate this, dont bring it to the discussion.

If a woman has multiple sexual partner in her past,the harder it is for her to blend in total bonding with her husband.

ahahahahahaha and this is also coming from one of your dear researches or what? bring some concrete facts to this discussion, as you are saying a lot of things that makes you look high on some cheap igbo. what has bonding with a partner TODAY got to do with past partners? if she loves and cares for her husband then she will surely bond with him.

her chances of cheating is also higher than if she had come in chaste. in this digital times of social media some wives never broke off from their lovers in facebook,bbm, twitter etc. the burden eventually eats up on most. every where are marriages whos burden of past relationship have proven too heavy a load to bear.

see confused bobo....here you are again bringing cheating to this discussion, but when i am going to explain to you why most people cheat (and that it has very little to do with past partner) you will come again with nonsense about cheating bla bla bla. but here is a clue: a woman who was married virgin has the same probability of cheating than one who had ex partners, simply because the amount of partners that you have does NOT determine if someone is going to cheat or not. pls educate yourself on what faithfulness is about, as you obviously dont know anything about it.

a virgin gal could have been double/triple/quadruple dating before marriage while sukcing everyone's cokc for freebies, while a non virgin gal with 10 exes could have NEVER cheated on any of her ex..... who would be the most likely person to cheat here? open your mind pls.

since cervical cancer is linked with a woman with multiple partners and men are not known to carry this disease, then it is not the same with other sexual disease.

pls do use what you have between your ears. ANYONE (women or men) having unprotected sex with multiple partners expose themselves to possibilities of catching a deadly disease etc. why are you focussing on cervical cancer? what about HIV/AIDS, Hepatitis, Ebola or Syphilis. why do you think only women are the weak link here when both Men and women with multiple partners are at risk?

seems your end motive is about "winning" than stating facts and opinion,lol. smells desperate to me way accross this platform.

my end motive is to bring some valid points to some very bias statements you made.... and we need to educate people so that they dont make the mistakes that you seem to be making.

In conclusion if you dont believe that if a woman's past lover is a sex god and her hubby is a sex-as-a-duty husband she is very likely to cheat on her hubby with either than guy or any male with the faintest of resemblance, then the girls here are laughing at you.

may i ask how old you are? you must be either A) very young or B) very uneducated in women.... ok let's go there:
First and foremost, we can all be sex God if we know what we are doing and connect with that lady so that she can open up to you. just because men like you find inabilities to bring a woman to the promiseland shouldnt be a reason to believe that all men are lacking like you do.
Second, if that ex was "that" good with this lady then she would still be with him and not married to some other man.
Third, even if her past lover was the best man in the bedroom, do you actually think that most women would automatically cheat RATHER THAN talk to their husband about their lacking sexlives, in order to teach her husband and/or spice and improve their bedroom activities? i guess in your world all women with exes are possible cheats then, right? bwaaaaah! divorce, no? talking to her hubby, no? its straight to cheating....oh lawd!
Last but not least, is it not simply that your weak low self esteem ego would rather that your woman should be a virgin so that she can only know the BS sex game you are going to provide, and she should have NO experience in the bedroom so that she has nothing to compare your weak sex game with?! sadly, every man should do whatever they possibly can to satisfy their women, and if their exes was God then i suggest you come down from your high and mighty horse, talk to her and discover her fully (like her ex did) so that you TOO can become her sex God.

netsurf:
How best to handle a stubborn wife...when I say stubborn, I mean vry stubborn...she doesn't listen nor take any advice or order from her husband...dosen't respect the man's opinion about anything...on a few occasions, when she accepts she was wrong, she also want to be the judge in her own case. If the husband view his opinion about any subject, she would insist she consult google for her to believe. It's no exageration...this is how exactly she behaves.

Pls note that she was the epitome of an humble woman before the wedding but as soon as the weding bell rang, she became another thing entirely.
Pls anyone with good idea on how to handle such women before divorce option?

what else is there to do but to explain to her that you desperately need to find the lady you were dating and proposed to, and not this stubborn being that she turned into, before you take drastic measures. if she decides to change, you have to monitor her to make sure that any time she slips, you bring her back to reality. since she possibly wont believe your threats, i suggest you go ahead with divorce planning to make sure she understands you means business.

too much what exactly..... she doesnt even show any tittays. lol

@OP
why would you stay in this unrewarding unhappy union, and keep on being miserable willingly?! if it doesnt go then it DOESNT GO. dont keep staying in some BS union because of that paper that called you Mrs. being a divorced lady or single again may scare you BUT being miserable in a dead end marriage will simply damage you for life. if you dont go toward where you wanna be in life then you will never get there; and unless you start making steps towards where you wanna be, you will always remain in that miserable place you find yourself today. so you simply have to tell yourself that you try and it didnt work out. we all make mistakes and its never too late to correct them.

here are a few questions for you before you should consider marriage though:
- when was the last time you were happy because of this marriage?
- when was the last time you felt blessed because of that marriage?
- when was the last time you felt good about yourself (or who you see in the mirror every morning)?
- what does your heart beat for, what are you passionate about, and is your life in anyway connected to any of it?

but men are now being pros at that con game as well, see these nice weaves:

oh yeah, its real!!!!!

Cutehector:
woow.. Are u for real?

why would i lie about this? many arab/muslim women are also into this con/act, and they rightfully get married as "virgins"

lezz:
Leading science research has concluded that women secret a homone during sex that binds her to her partner.

the involuntary homonal secretion leads to psychological inbalance in normal mating behaviour.

WOMEN ARE BIOLOGICALLY PROGRAMMED TO HAVE ONE SEXUAL PARTNER.

please care to give us ANY link from that "leading science research" to what you wrote above?!

The American medical journal has also linked cervical cancer to women with multiple sex partners. Now this one is no news. it has been statistically proven some years ago that women with multiple sex partners are more prone to have this disease.

of course she is, just like any other diseases.... thats because she is in contact with multiple men, therefore having more risk to catch HPV which has a direct link to cervical cancer. now, are men less prone to catch deadly diseases when they have multiple partners, NO....can this lady catch such disease with being with only one man, YES.

And now on a lighter note, if a woman happened to have had an" Usane Bolt" as one of her sexual partners, and marries an average Jo in bed, she is sure going to cheat.

the fact that you believe that the basis of cheating is unfulfilling sex activities, is the reason why you will always fail in this debate. even a satisfied woman at home would cheat if she is not RIGHT in her head. many cheat for money, for power, for foolishness, because they were drunk and weak etc. get your facts right bro!

Only d IV ine intervention can prevent this. Women do not joke with orgasm,lord help the man who marries a woman he can only give less orgasm to than a past lovers who might be the jobless,igbo-smoking street urchine.

what a pile of nonsense!

MugabeRobert:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dASnWhwzL-Y


Just watch this video.

even that criminal couldnt reply to the policeman who was telling him the truth about his devilish activities. this liar was continuing to try to deceive people, saying that he does not know his church name, or the name of his pastor bwaaaah! they can cry rivers upon rivers, as the man told him, he is the devil ahahahahahaha! football ko, knee ball ni!!!!

lezz:
OK, let me address your confusion. if a man bleeps , say 20 females before marriage and a woman also bleeped 20 guys , the lady will be worse off psychologically, physically and socially.

bro, care to elaborate on the above (especially the psychological and physical part)?