₦airaland Forum

If God be God...
If the sun still shines at day and moon at night...

My brother, before the end of next year, u will carry ur boys... Save there is no God. Quote me when she brings them forth.
You can keep doing what u feel will help as to feel relaxed but the end point is that I wrote above.

QUOTE ME WHEN SHE BRINGS THEM FORTH.

Chaiiii.... Rip nne.

May heaven comfort your baby n hubby

My aunt's boy. Actually, I spanked him for misbehaving and after he cried a while he said..." See your eyes like bussycat, Onyeojo!" (Onyeojo) means "Wicked One."

XolezCouture:
9k

The sandal is how much pls

sweeteasestore:
Hi Lovelies . Our free classes will be resuming very soon . Watch this space for updates . Follow us on instagram @sweettease_store , watsapp: 09073658245 . #sweetteasebeauty600 . We are still committed to training 600 women for free in 2017 to start up their own beauty business empires . See you there

Hello sweets, good evening to you. pls can you add me?? Or rather can I add you? I'd really love to partake. Thanks.

The title of this thread made me 'Laugh My Ass Out'

xynerise:
If I start telling you my stories ''Chi ge gi, chi ga bo''

As in ehhh

I love this thread!

MadCow1:
[b]As a Student in school, one Sunday whilst at church, my phone rang and when I answered, it was the sweetest and most angelic voice I have ever heard in my life. Barely 30 seconds into the conversation, I realized she had called the wrong number and I was a bit reluctant to tell her but I did and she apologized and hung up.

I couldn't help myself so I called her and complimented her voice and told her how melodic her voice was and all that sweet nothing we guys say, she was a good sport and laughed but didn't take Offence nor hang up. I told her I would call her from time to time just to hear her say hi and she didn't object. I got back to the hostel and told my homies about my encounter and one of them said he also had a similar experience and that he is currently holding steady chats with his own unknown caller on the phone. After several chats, I enquired about her location and the chances of us meeting and she said 'Accra'.. Accra was quite the distance from my school and the roads where horrible. 6 hours plus.

Anyways, it was on.. I was already looking forward to meeting the finest girl I would have ever met who had the sweetest voice I have ever heard. A couple of months down, I was in Accra and I called her up and set up a meeting and she agreed.

D-Day arrived and I went to the designated bus stop just near a filling station and waited for the arrival of my Swan princess. As I stood there, I caught the sight of a beautiful girl walking in my direction, my heart froze and I stood transfixed on her hip as it swayed like a pendulum ball from side to side with every step she took in my direction. The closer she got, the faster my heartbeat. She was tall, dark skinned, slim body build, too slim for the arsse she was carrying on her slender waistline, pretty face, perky boo-bs and wore a fitted jean that made all her asset stand out. I was stunned and even started panicking as I doubted I wouldn't stutter in the presence of this Pochahuntas looking goddess.Then she picked her phone up and started making a call and my EKG spiked. when she started speaking and walked past me, my heart sank.. It was not her. I continued waiting. Several hot Babes kept walking past that at some point I might as well have been at a runway modeling show. A few minutes passed and nothing. Just then I saw another babe walking slowly and looking confused as though she was looking for someone.

Immediately, my Spidy-Sense started tingling fast. Jesus Christ of Kumasi, this babe was Ugly as fhuck. I immediately took cover and watched her movements from behind my hiding place. The girl stopped, head looking around, she picks her phone and dials a number, I felt my phone vibrate and the voice of James Blunt came out his speakers singing 'You're beautiful'.. FHUCK THAT!! I slapped the phone silent and contemplated my next move. I can't be caught with this Ogre in broad daylight, my reputation would be ruined. So after a few seconds, I answered and Lo! She was the one calling me, I could see her lips moving in sync with the voice in my ears. immediately I sap tarted retreating and told her I had to run off as one of my mates called with an emergency that please we should reschedule our meeting. She looked disappointed but said cool and I fixed a new meeting for later that evening. After she left, I came out my hiding place and ran for my life.. That line has never been used again since that day.

That's my story..

moral Lesson: Never judge a face by its voice. [/b]

Maddy how na??


This made me forget how bad today was.

Ifakiland:
She will pour me acid and cut my dick if I don't marry her....so I AV to marry her ni o

Werey abeg lemme this night oo

akoko11:
Hope u were among those chicks that contacted him

guy I dey cubana for Owerri first! #WaitMakeICome#

I'd be waiting till MERCEDES gives me one.

.

Wooooow

engine2016:
Sorry Honey I didn't knw I hurt ur vagina the last time...

No punch line.

helpforever:
I have not gone to a brothel since 2014. I am actually scared of prostitutes now.

Good. That is one step forwards.

Next get a woman and a doctor.

helpforever:
Bro, this is a serious issue.

U are not impotent. U need a woman in ur life who u can call ur own.

When u get her, explain all this to her and let her give u a good head then u back it up with seeing a good doctor.

Boyyy u need a wild wild girl.

Pls can u now stop the brothel thingy??

Chaii

Cc seun,finalboss lalasticlala, thorpido

Abeg oooo

This will be my first and last post about this issue!

Abeg, my dear good people of nairaland.

Some of us have got loved ones on sick bed, those about to be thrown out of their homes, those suffering from ancestral curses, jobless ones, plenty hunger too even one babe wey dey runs or bobo wey be gigolo too. Abeg how come u wey be Sherlock Holmes no fit profer solution to the gbege? Na ask I ask- no vex o
***If you think say to be a rich man na a walk in the park.... Oya na try make we see!

Please make una carry una family problem for head first, wipe am clean, then know if u go get time buckle belt dey reason another person doings.

He hold bar be say he Don hold bar. If u like shout from now till Rapture day, one day, the news go die down and guess what? U go still dey trek from Fadeyi to Oshodi!

Alaye no time ooo. Olowo la ye mo

******Quote me and commit suicide in jiffy ****
Me no support or condemn anybody o. my own be say DEY UR LANE! U sef find ur own paroles do cus in the end, Everything Stands at an Attention When Benjamin Franklin head show.

Ahmed0336:
chai!! !!

youngberry001:
and waiting dey stop u from having a baby

Bling ya brokus na

GlorifiedTunde:
Then what are you waiting for?

Ur prickson.

Pls who doesn't get all what the shenanigans are for.

The write up confuse me pass why the okada way carry me today go for front of dangote trailer dey tell am say "0ga I go jam you oo" as in wait o.... So na me dey type dis tin??

I ge luck no be small.

So so sweet! Now I wan have a baby tooooo

LordOfNaira:
You mean Apostle Joyhnstick SuLICKman?

Hai gosh! Are u mad before ni? if u dare make me wake my aunt me and u go digger am!

mamadsquare:
You say someone has been missing for quite a while, her uncle was supposedly contacted by someone who claimed to be her boyfriend, the next rational thing to do would be to alert other members of the family especially her mom, but he didn't do that, he didn't save the guy's number, he can't remember the year or month the guy called? It smells all fishy, pardon me but maybe what you should be searching for is closure. That uncle of hers knows something that you oters don't know.
The supposed call from her boyfriend to announce himself as being her boyfriend, that she lives with him and that he decided to call because he is on a business trip will be to what aim exactly? The uncle might just have told that tale in order for you to look away or not think that she might be no more.
Ofcourse, this might be all speculation but please think deep about these things, the relationship she had with the uncle, the reason for her insistence on moving out of his house and so on. Try as much as possible to be objective and not emotional while digging for the truth.

And why it had to be the uncle that was called. Not even her dear mother.

engine2016:
is that your Panties.... damn gurl did u inherit it? it looks ancient

I'd rather sit on hot coal than reply a P. m from you. Your fada! Guy I say Ur real fada!

Stupid runs boy! U forgotten mskrisx? the one u tagged an "Olosho" in place of your mother? Damn! Honey, we still on it. And Yes... I'd give u a rat poison if opportunity calls. So much hatred for u and your ilks since then till a day after enternity.

DEY YOUR LANE! bloody pig.

Come clean with your main moniker make we digger am once once. I get time wella this 9t

okosodo:
Rest in peace bro

See u... Mad fowl but did any part of the story say he DIED??

mazizitonene:
lol....

Did u just type lol? With that face? u shittin' me??

SweetBoyFriend:

You can laugh at him all you want but he has accomplished many things you cannot achieve in your lifetime

Lavell Maurice Crawford made 1 million dollars in his Can a brother get some love

Made millions of dollars on the movie Breaking bad

Made millions of dollars in it's always sunny in Philadelphia

Performs all over the world

Has a mansion in hidden hills, calabasa, California, the same place Drake lives, a place you can't afford to buy a house in

Has a wife and two kids

His mother works for him and he pays her salaries

Tell me one thing you have successfully achieved in your life, I'm waiting

Crazy crazy clown @ ya last sentence.

cummando:
Chibueze Dadubule

You meet person wey no get skon skon
Me go beat you join your money.

If I no fit beat you na to aim for ya blokus!! Two gentle squeezes and you are squealing like a mouse. Three squeezes and you are offering m another $500.

Emi omo

Gawd! Are y'all mad on Nl? oh lawd save me from these clowns!