₦airaland Forum

ah! i get plenty plenty stories to share ooo for this one, the fact i am still alive is just the miracle of God. let me just share 2 of my stories sha

story 1

we just finished watching super ted and i just suddenly had this bright idea that i could fly too, so i told my kid bro and we both agreed to try it out. i climbed on the long dinning table, tied one of my mom's scarf around my neck as my cape and ran from one edge of the table to the other and just leaped into the air with both hands stretched forth. well, to cut the story short, i had my first practical physic lesson in my life, gravity works!


story 2

back in secondary school days, i always liked reading detective novels for kids like famous 5 and shakespeare stuff and felt pretty good that i can solve mysteries thinking i was some kind of sherlock holmes. so in JJ2 i formed a group with 5 friends telling them we will be the school's unofficial detectives and solve crimes. it so happened one time there were reports by some farmers that students where stealing their yams on the farmer and other fruits. my friends and i jumped into action trying to solve the mystery. during one of our long breaks we went into the bush to set traps to catch the thieves, we took our make-shift bo.0by-traps and a toy gun for this mission. deep inside the bush after setting most of the traps we encounter some activities going on and wanted to investigate properly. low and behold we found our thieves but they were not students but grown men, what we were not sure of was if they were farmers or just straight up thieves, so we hide behind bushes while watching their every move. suddenly, one of my silly friends got all hyped up and took the toy gun and came out charging from our hiding place and screamed "FREEZE!" the action shocked the men and us his friends and before we could say jack robinson, the men were chasing us we with cutlasses, hoes and all manner of shinning metals; come see us doing ben johnson, no bi small thing. we ran for our dear lives. at some point we scattered in the bush and kept running until i fell into one of our traps. frantically i was fighting to get myself freed and my friend saw me and helped me. as soon as i was up from the ground one of the men spotted my friend and i and came at us full speed, we dashed again heading towards the school while he was hot on our heels. all of a sudden, i spotted a huge shrub and we docked behind it and climbed the nearest tree. after a few minutes we saw the man panting and running under the tree and heading toward the school. we came down and ran off in a different direction until we got to school and found out the rest made it out alive. that was one crazy experience and i even started writing a book about our adventures but never completed it. good old days i tell ya! 

190:
yea very very singlet!

liar!

justwise:
[/b]
You are definately a funny character, so men should make an effort to pay back while women are entitled to keep their own money? [b]How abt women saying NO to gift from a man? These are gone when women depend on men, its equal partnership now.[/b]

u r my man, give me 5!

bk/babe97:
Mine was in New Hampshire. I was about 16 yrs old and we went to this one popular beach (me my uncle and my cuz). My uncle was like 25yrs old then- - - same age as my cuz. Anyways, they started  gassing me up telling I dont know how to holla at chics bla bla bla. They told me to prove them wrong.  Then they pointed out this Latina chic for me to go talk to. I was sweating  but I played it off and sauntered off to where the chic was standing. As I approched, Baby gal started to smile so I was like "I got this". Son, I started spitting some fire lyrics. Hot game galore!!! lol. The girl just kept smiling and laughing. I look ova and my uncle and cuz r impressed. Then this other gal walks up in the middle of the convo and introduces herself to me as the cuz of the gal I was trying to bag and tells me "SHE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOURE SAYING!!! SHE JUST CAME FROM MEXICO TWO WEEKS AGO!!! SHE SPEAKS NO ENGLISH!!! Geez, all the rhymes I spit just wasted on a non-english speaking chic! All my rhymes just out the window like that!!! Ah, I felt defeated! When was I gonna get the confidence to holla like that again?!!?lol. I never told my uncle or cuz what happenned. They thot I did a good job cus they saw her smiling and they saw me collecting her number! Oh well. . . . .

LMAO!

as for my embarrassing toasting experience, now which one should i share, chai, man pikin don suffer! anywho, let me at least share this one. contrarily to popular belief, i am not a guy that runs after anything in skirt expect if that thing in skirt dey find my trouble ooo! back in the good old days of secondary school in abuja, i had a neighbor that just got back from abroad (where i grew up, most families where always on a transfer in and out of the country by the government, either as diplomats or some professional bull crap!). this chic named feyi was in my class and i totally ignored her and most girls in the class at that time. one time we wrote a test and i had just finished mine and was going to submit it to the teacher but decided to quickly scan through it to make sure i didnt make a mistake only for this girl to look at my paper and told me i didnt spell a particular word right, i believe that word was "LUMBERJACK"; instead of just admitting and thanking her for pointing it out to me, i shunned her telling her i knew the spelling was wrong that i just wanted to test our teacher and see if he will know the difference. she laughed and said yea right with her sexy accent. as God would catch me, she told me to correct it and write the right spelling, with gra gra i went ahead to spell the word again and still misspelled it! and she laughed again and she wanted to spell it out for me but i said no! at that the same time i was raising my head from my desk in anger and looking at her direction when our eyes met, omo, see fire! she had these extremely gorgeous eyes i never noticed b4 and her smile was just out of the world. mumu me, i gave her my paper and she took my pen and spelled the word correctly for me on my sheet. from that time i wouldn't just get her out of my mind and we became friends and she invited me over to her house. i went home and decked up nicely to meet her at the appointed time at her place and had all my lyrics set to win her over. i walked down to her place, climbed upstairs and knocked on her door, her 2 massively huge brothers came to answer the door at the same time, when i saw them, my confidence jump from upstairs to downstairs and left me hanging. i would not say a word not even her name, the kind of fear that caught me when i saw them was uncanny. for some reason they knew i came to see their kid sister and one held me by my shoulder and asked for my name which i managed to mutter to him. he led me to the living room and offered me a sit. the girl was called and when she came, i was shaking all over and trying my hardest to keep still knowing the 2 pair of terrifying eyes were watching me. she smiled that gorgeous smile again with those sparkling eyes but for some reason i couldnt still say a word. in fact, we had a wordless date. she ended up putting on a cartoon for us to watch and when the cartoon was over, i told her i wanna go home. once i was out of their house i ran, phew! the following monday when we met in class, she acted like i never made a fool of myself and she was all sweet and all, so we got talking again but i never went to her house again until after secondary school. i cant really explain what happened to me but i can assure u all that rehearsal i did b4 the date with all those lyrics failed me big time and my whole system shut down.  

aisha2:
Mine was the most embarassing toasting i ever got. We were friends for a long time and i guess he did not have the liver to come and ask me out so he went to drink to get the courage. He came to my house, My mom and Dad were at the dinning table we were at the sitting room, he started stammereing and next thing just vomited on me and all over our parlour, then Fainted, See confusion, the vomit smelled of alchohol, Na wa oh, see me and my parents trying to revive him amdist cleaning vomit. Kai, good times, My Father reminds him till today that he had to change our carpet to tiles cos of him to prvent reoccurance

now that was funny and to think u still married him, girl u get heart!

Diva 2.0:
I'm demanding clarification. You're the one dodging the question I first asked.

i asked first!

Diva 2.0:
If she isn't human, what is she?

stop dodging the question jor

Diva 2.0:
https://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/22.gif https://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/22.gif

awww, dont be shy

H2O2:
If you're in one of those 50-50 relationships then it can go either way.
LOL, she better propose because I won't do it.

LMAO!

Diva 2.0:
https://l.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/mesg/emoticons7/22.gif

come on, u can say it, we know already, we just want to hear from the horses mouth

chi-baby:
errrr excuse me!. . .do u remember wen u tld me this place waz run by yo humble self and yo wonderful wife?? . . .jus cnt member her name nw   . . or u 4got u married??  

ah ah! wah do u mean??  

i am a muslim and i am allowed to marry 4, so better toe the line and become number 2 b4 sum1 else takes ur spot

Diva 2.0:
The purpose and logic behind this thread. She's a woman who loves her bf with or without money but she's asking if women can do it. Doesn't that kinda answer the question? I mean if she can do it, doesn't it mean women can do it?

nobody ever said she was human. now can u a human woman do it?

chi-baby:
and are u single??

are u trying to die young?

Kobojunkie:
In a democracy, you would have to PROVE they were Traitors, and that it is not just personal. I think the @Poster is point in bringing up this question. Does or should the president have the power to dismiss anyone, because they do not agree with President or side with him on certain issues?  Is that right in a democracy? Do you reshuffle because you are not getting YOUR WAY?

in whose democracy?  BTW the next time i send u an IM and u refuse to reply me eh!

Diva 2.0:
I don't get it.

what dont u get?

chi-baby:
pls where is my match??  

hey baby, i was going to give u kgdavid but apparently he does not deserve u and since i love u so much i will not allow 190 to kill u at an early age so with careful consideration, i have decided to be ur match, at least i know u will get the best bcuz u deserve the best  

Kgdavid:
u mean you are made of fart?? *smiles and replaces shotgun*  

fart is a kinda breeze but no!

nellaluv:
ok, u can stay here all by urself and wait for someone else to reply your reply,lol

or u can simply just follow me to the bedroom and forget we just met

havilla:
i met this guy in 2005 when i was in naija, we started talking and within months we developed strong feelings for each other, he was soo good to me , he made me laugh and i felt soo happy being around him, the chemistry was just spot on, but unfortunately he is my brothers friend older brother and my brother didnt like the idea when he found out because i was 18 years old then and the guy was 23 yrs old, he also said the guy was not an ambitious person because he didnt have a job back then. he called the guy and warned him seriously to back off, when i called him later he told me we should just forget it. ever since then i havent been the same because i think about him alot, i mean its been almost six years but i cant seem to get him out of my mind, i have even dated someone else for three years but the feeling doesnt go away, no one seems to make me feel the same way he does. when i met him like two years ago, i was surprised to know that he was going through the same thing because we kept staring at each other and i could feel the chemistry in the air and he even tried to kiss me. when i went home last xmas my sister told me of how he has gotten a good job and he has even bought his fiance a brand new car, the fact that he loves someone else enough to buy a car for her is what pained me the most. i dont know if its true love or lust or if its even an obssession, but i want to move on and get this guy out of my memory forever, but everything i do isnt working . pls help me!!!!

so technically u want the new car, right?

since women want a 50-50 r/s i say a woman shld kneel down and propose

VGA:
Please how can i go about this. Her name is Rukiatu

Help me girls

my friend u no go wait for line oooo! u know how many of us don register?

newcreatio:
Forum, pls contribute to this.
I find myself in this situation at least 3 times a week. How do I handle this?

my guy, instead of u to thank ur lucky stars u dey form, wait until she stops the sex ur eyes go reach ground.

tufg:
i hv a boy friend even wit money or not i still luv him.can some girls luv without money

tell that to the 99.99% NL girls and see what they say to u.

newcreatio:
I need a little understanding of the Nigerian Constitution including what is acceptable and what is not. Does the President(or Acting President) have the right to Sack His Ministers For No Reason?
What is the Current state of things in Nigeria. Several Sources are saying different things. Are the Ministers Sacked or is the Cabinet reshuffled?

yup! he was appointed for no reason and can equally be disappointed for no reason

nellaluv:
pheew, thank God for that, i was wondering when u're gonna give-up and leave,lol

who said anything about leaving?

Diva 2.0:
[b]Many women do get their men amazing gifts though. [/b]Men just tend to give gifts more because they are tryna impress her.

yes like socks and ties, amazing like no other as for the guys giving more, if he doesnt she will walk or call him names

nellaluv:
I'm your dominatrix and i call the shots don't make me whip your a s s boy
https://extreme-domination.com/ss/meninpain-6.gif

unfortunately i am not white!

y me:
wait till i break you into two
which neighbor?the one you slept with the wife and they were forced to park out of that neighborhood
because you cant keep that thorn made rod you call a _di-ck in your pants

i was doing community service, kinda like being a good neighbor

Kgdavid:
now that i have been scorned im back in the mood *retrieves shotgun from ubder bed again* and going to take someone with me. na2day you are number one on the list

dem dey shoot breeze?

justwise:
You are not making any clean point here, if a woman can't give then she shouldn't take.

How abt the saying: What a man can do, a woman can do it EVEN better? Oh yes i know not when it comes to money.

Women are as educated as men thesedays, earn alot of money as well, if they will be happy to collect from their gfs then what stops them from helping out when the bf runs into financial prob?

my guy, i owe u 6 packs no joke!

queeneve:
Na2day,

You still can't fight, you sissy bish and you talking about meeting my fiance on a block. You better stay your crippled arse on the computer where you can fight with your typing.

Daduke, you eating all up in Na2day's arse. How do chit taste like? Nutty? Crunchy? Chocolately? Never mind, your breaf stank!


Carry On!

since reading and comprehension is not ur strong suit, i cant blame u for not being able to assimilate and make a logical response

badoomusoo:
15 yrs old?
Either she's got a 9 yr old brain or she's suffering from chronic Fixation
Her thots/views/jokes are so peurile and sickening.Makes me wonder
which 'MOFO' is decieving her with 'FIANCE',Anyways she sounds very gullible too.I know she doles out all her money to the Guy
Only coming to NL to make a fool of herself.

i think we are insulting 9 year olds here, i am beginning to think she is 4 with a 2 yr old brain