₦airaland Forum

Let's give him some time, I dont know why I believe he will make a positive impact.

The name is cool though.

[quote author=mama-gee link=topic=455295.msg6146576#msg6146576 date=1275589595][color=deeppink]A married woman should have no business with her ex in the first place. . .

I find it tacky.[/color][/quote]ok, I now accept your proposal to marry me, mama-gee, pick a date.

since I now know you will not have any business with your numerous ex after marriage.

comechop:
Sorry for the spam, but I need an answer asap my people:

Not to hijack this thread, but I have a quick completely off tangent question - about this new epassport thing.

I dey go naija this summer, and my old green passport is STILL valid. I have to renew my visa - do I need to get this new epassport to renew it? Or can I renew my visa with my old passport?
Again apologies to the OP for semi thread hijacking.

Depends on the embassy.

Most embassies require that your passport be valid for at least six months.

But what stops you from getting a new one when you go naija in summer?

Your wife should make things easier, if her salary does not amount to much, then she should cooperate with you.

I dont see how you will successful maintain two homes with salary of 80k.

So reason (gently and in love) with your wife. She can find another job in abuja.

good.

hope he would have been able to say same about her too.

what stops you from moving your family to abuja?

is your wife working? if yes, what is her income? & does her income justifies keeping the family in Lagos?

Exactly chaircover. We need an update.

and what is the prospect of the job offer from chiejik?

You don't need that kind of a boss.

Resume job-hunt ASAP, but dont resign till you get another job.

Kobojunkie:
I disagree with that.
Please . . . you assume there that people even considered their marriage a model of some sort.

How many times have I heard the statement 'after all, so, so & so persons did it'. Please there are people of influence.

Kobojunkie:
My Gosh!!! In this day and age, how many people actually marry for the second reason?

Please think/look outside of the west, a large population of the world are still religious.

While we thank him for creating something different from the norms,

That green-white-green flag is not the best. We can have something better.

The more people drop the knowledge of God and his word, and the more a lot of pastors, religious leaders and influential people divorce their partners, the higher the rate of divorce goes.

Al Gore and Tipper have just given courage to many other marriages going through challenges to consider the option of divorce

I also want to say that many people marry cos of societal pressure and cos it is a sin to have sex outside marriage, and the highest cause of divorce is infidelity.

Ranoscky:
Kini big deal

Tcrack:
all those of you saying '"NO, WHAT ARE BANKS FOR, HE IS NOT MAN ENOUGH."etc, I guess you have never really needed money. if you have ever REALLY needed money, your ex or your wifes ex would appeal to you. how easy is it to get a loan from a bank? whay makes you think she cant be bleeping him without borrowing a penny from him? i would like to see the look on your face when baba landlord comes ond throw you and your kids on the street knowing fully well that there is someone who could have easily helped you if you would only ask.

You might as well ask her to go and hawk her body so that you can make ends meet and avoid your landlord eviction.

any big deal?

ola olabiy:
trust me on this. almost all married women stay in touch with one ex lover or the other.  up to 3 among my ex's still call me regularly. the same with my brothers. one is even a stong 'born again' christian. one tells her husband about it. believe me guys, they tend to stay in touch with men who continue to progress or if you treated them well when you're lovers.

ola olabiy:
and they ask for gifts occassionally. but, the fact is, 'once there is there forever'. forget what women are saying here, almost all of them would have intimacy with you as long as you continue to progress (at least better than their husbands). or if you were so nice (and successful now as well) when you're lovers.

i have not done it (intmacy) just out of respect i have for them but i know it is possible. i tend to stay in touch with those who treated me well. some of these girls were so nice when we're lovers.


are jonathan goodluck's ex's not going to try to stay in touch with him now?

think about that.

I still need to understand what you mean by 'staying in touch'

But whatever that means, only an irresponsible and shameless woman will carry the affair of her family to her ex, to the extend of borrowing money from him,
which means she is indirectly telling her ex, that her husband is incapable.

As for me, if my wife 'stays in touch' and borrowed money from the ex and I found out, she lost whatever respect and trust I have for her

Fhemmmy:
This is one of the things that scares me about marriage.
How could people that have married for 40 years, grandpa and grandma, all of a sudden wanna go their separate ways?
Would it not have been better if they have done this while they were like 10 years of even less into the marriage?
God saves us oh

Don't give up Fhemmy. All hope is not lost. You will find your own wife.

Would have given you one of my sisters for 5 of those your lovely autos as bride price, but they are all happily married.

Well, may the guns are no longer reliable, like every other thing in Naija

so the second gun is for backup, in case the 1st refuse to fire in critical situations


But seriously, it is ridiculous. Sometimes you ask yourself if they are going for war or something else.

^^Ok. I accept. let me not derail the thread further


@Topic

Is there any hope for this country? It seems to me the leaders are not just getting it.

But she is not different from or more guilty than others

Why her?

[quote author=~Sauron~ link=topic=455295.msg6138872#msg6138872 date=1275496358]All these are brain-farts, Ujujoan.
Whatever makes a woman seeking money from an ex bad. . . .it also makes a woman seeking any favour from any man BAD as well.
That's ma point.

And i am saying she would have lost the same pride/respect(including the husband and family pride), received an insult and at the end got NOTHING if she asks any male acquaintance for ANY FAVOUR at all(excluding financial assistance).
One assistance is not more honourable than the other. I dunno why this line of logic is difficult to grasp.[/quote]Am not contesting your logic, only that, it is another debate for another thread.

But at least let as agree that as far as this thread subject is concerned, she and her husband have much to lose asking for financial assistance from an ex, hence it doesnt worth it.

@Kobo

Agree. But you took up the crusade like there are more to it.

Are you sure she didn't block one of your proposals or did something that affected you personally?

otawa:
Kobo. I dont know her and I have nothing to do with her.

My grouse is that every now and then we have CLEAN opportunity to set the country on the right path but what do we do; screw up.

In 1998 when Abiola and Abacha died, it was perfect chance to set the country straight but we were saddled with Mr Obasanjo.
We know how it ended.

In 2010 when Yaradua died, it was another perfect chance and what do we get? another thief as president.

Do you see what $67million could to to Nigeria I wrote above?

It is HALF the National budget of GAMBIA for crying out loud. useless country indeed!

I agree with you. The amount is ridiculous. And what do we gain after spending that amount on celebrating our 50yrs of failure?

Kobojunkie:
ROFLMAO  . . . .

Ok @Otawa, I am gonna bite.  . . what is up with you and this woman? I mean I know she needs to be brought to justice for that case and any other but seriously, tell us. Why do I get the sense that this is more than just the money for you? Is she from your village or something? You encounter this woman before her husband became a politician or something? wetin? I am with you that she needs to face the music, but[b] like my obsession with getting people to understand that Akunyili is no HERO[/b], I think there is more to yours too.  

LOL  

so you admit you are obsessed with Akinyili !!!

While we wait for Otawa answer, can you also do us a favour, by letting us know the reason why you are obsessed with Akinyuli.  

[quote author=~Sauron~ link=topic=455295.msg6138565#msg6138565 date=1275493195]And to think you will do it with your ex and NOT trusting the woman you married under vows make you a consummate simpleton, self-centred, priggish and pseudo-authoritative.[/quote]Like I said, nothing personal. And I didn't say I will do it with my ex. (make me a liar and quote me)

[quote author=~Sauron~ link=topic=455295.msg6138632#msg6138632 date=1275493802]What nonsense sexual harassment are we talking about here?
She asks and if the guy attaches a condition to it, she leaves. . . .What is the biggie in it?[/quote]the big deal is that she would have lost her pride/respect (including the husband's and family pride), received an insult and at the end got NOTHING.

Now the question is: 'Does it worth it?'

Celebrate our failures for whopping N10b - Shame!.

The 50th year anniversary should have been a call to weep and wail for Nigeria.

Just may be, we can soberly reflect on our past and decide to make the next 50years better.

It will be better to equip some of the schools, hospitals or tare one of the death trapped road with the N10b

[quote author=~Sauron~ link=topic=455295.msg6138483#msg6138483 date=1275492560]You are a disgrace to manhood!!!![/quote]No. I think you are.

To think you have the capability of subjecting your wife to such ridicule, means you are shameless,

insensitive and unworthy to be called a MAN. - no pun intended & nothing personal

Sauron rest it, dont justify a wrong thing and you are defending badly.

I will see my self as a failure and unworthy to be call an husband/father

if the last option I have is for my wife to go and ask an ex for money - God forbids!

michelin89:
Even if the man demands, he still assumes the woman will give in.

She might and she might not (We are talking about an ex, remember)

Even if she refuses, the demand is already an insult on her and her husband.

michelin89:
I am surprised that despite he is married he still sees women are sexual objects or weak entities who easily exchange their bodies for material commodities.

If that is it, I wonder why he needs one in the first place.

Whack argumentation! The guy is just climbing mirrors.

You didnt get him.

I think the point he is making is that men are more likely to demand for an affair in exchange for the favour (especially from an Ex)

Unlike women, who most likely might just assist with no other string attached.

IMO, it is better and safer for the couple to assume the rich-ex does not exist and seek alternative solution to their financial need.

That will be an insult to me as an husband.

I will rather pay bank interest on bank loan, or go hungry to meet the need than allow it.

And if my wife does it and I found out, she lost my respect and trust for her from that day.

whatever, as long as her a.ss rot in jail

Everyone is entitled to his/her lifestyle

But I dislike it and I will never be a friend or associate with a gay.

Who cares?

hmmm, what was abuzola doing in sexuality section, reading porndudude sexescapade, is it not forbidden?

God! am I posting in religion section? cant believe myself