₦airaland Forum

A widower in Brazil, Aparecido Castaldo, 74, has
decided to end his solitutude and marry his pet goat,
Carmelita.
“She doesn’t speak and doesn’t want money,” says
the father of eight children - four women and four
men from four different marriages.
Mr Castaldo, who has been in love with the pet for
two years, wanted to be united with his goat Carmela
in a church, by an evangelical minister.
Unfortunately, none of the churches he contacted
with his unusual request wanted to perform the
ceremony.
So Aparecido eventually contacted Toninho do Diabo
(Tom the Devil), an old friend who just happens to be
one of the most famous satanists in Brazil.
The wedding is now scheduled to take place at
midnight, on October 13, at the Devil’s Church, in
Sao Paolo. ”Only our church accepted this love
between man and animal because we have no
prejudice,” Toninho said.
The wedding will be followed by a big party on All
Souls’ Day the following day.
Carmelita ate her first wedding dress but has been
found another.
Her husband to be , Mr Aparicedo said: “Whenever
someone says I am doing something wrong I reply
the goat does not speak, ask for money to go
shopping and doesn’t get pregnant - and she can’t
talk.”

Abuja - President Goodluck Jonathan reaffirmed his
administration’s commitment to implementation
policies that will ensure that Nigerian youth
received quality education that will equip them
with essential skills employers required.
Speaking after a meeting with former British Prime
Minister, Gordon Brown, Jonathan said in addition
to providing the $250 million required to match the
amount raised by international donors towards
giving more Nigerian youth access to basic
education, the federal government would support
state governments to ensure they used the funds
appropriately.
"Education is critical to making our youth more
employable. The Coordinating Minister of the
Economy/Finance and the Minister of Education will
work with the states to make sure that the
programme succeeds,” Jonathan said.
Brown, who now serves as the United Nations
Special Envoy on Global Education, said the UN and
international donors were committed to working
with the federal and state governments to expand
teacher training programmes, improve girl-child
education and boost the use of the tools of modern
technology such as e-books and tablets in
providing basic education to more Nigerian youth.
He said he had successful meetings with Ministers
of Education, Finance and Foreign Affairs as well as
senior government officials.

Nice one

Former militant and leader of the Niger Delta Peoples
Volunteer Force (NDPVF), Mujahid Asari-Dokubo, on
Sunday declared that President Goodluck Jonathan’s
presidential ambition in 2015 was already settled, as
his Niger Delta compatriots would not succumb to
any force opposed to its full actualization.
There would be blood in the streets if Mr. Jonathan is
not reelected president in the 2015 election, the
militant leader threatened.
Mr. Asari-Dokubo, who was a guest on a Channels
Television programme, Politics Today, monitored in
Abuja, said he would register as a full member of the
ruling Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) to enable him
join in the fight to realize the president’s re-election
bid.
“The way things are going, there is no sitting on the
fence in the battle before us,” Mr. Asari-Dokubo said.
“When some people say they have a right to rule and
others don’t have, then there is no sitting on the
fence. All of us will have to be in the ring and fight.
We cannot leave Goodluck (Jonathan) alone.
“My support for Jonathan will be biased, because
charity begins at home. Monkey no fine, but im
mama like am. Goodluck, na my person. 2015 is
already a settled matter. Goodluck Jonathan would
be President in 2015.
“Whether they contest or they don’t. If they say the
blood of the dogs and the baboons will be soaked in
the streets, or salt water in the streets, we will help
them in blood in the streets.”
Insisting there was no crisis in the PDP in the wake of
the walkout during the recent National Convention
by some aggrieved members, led by former Vice
President Atiku Abubakar, and seven governors, Mr.
Asari-Dokubo said the exit of seven out of 23
governors elected on PDP ticket was not enough to
cause any crisis.
On the role of two former Presidents, Ibrahim
Babangida and Olusegun Obasanjo, who are working
towards an amicable resolution of the crisis, Asari-
Dokubo described the duo, who are also members of
the Board of Trustees (BOT) of the PDP, as “agents
provocateur”, who are fueling the crisis by declaring
that they do not want Jonathan to run in the 2015
elections.
He accused Messrs Babangida and Obasanjo of
secretly encouraging the Jigawa state governor, Sule
Lamido to run for President, with Rivers state
governor, Chubuike Amaechi as his deputy, adding
that at one recent public function, Mr. Babangida had
said that Mr. Amaechi and the Speaker of the House
of Representatives, Aminu Tambuwal, were good to
run for higher offices come 2015.
He described the Rivers state governor as “a traitor
to the collective aspirations of the people of Rivers
State,” saying whatever situation the governor is
facing he deserved it, as there was no better way a
traitor could be treated by Rivers people.
On the intervention of the National Assembly in the
crisis in the Rivers State House of Assembly, the
militant leader criticized the decision to take over the
legislative functions of the Assembly, saying the
lawmaker lacked the moral high ground to have done
so, since they were unable to take a similar action
when they were embroiled in corruption charges a
few years ago.
Mr. Asari-Dokubo, who claimed he was a card-
carrying member and major financial of the defunct
Action Congress of Nigeria (ACN) until December 27,
2010, said he would be joining the PDP to enable him
join in fighting for President Jonathan’s candidacy
from the inside.
Ruling out any possibility of running for any office in
2015, he said his focus for now was on getting the
Mr. Jonathan’s reelection project delivered.
“I will declare for the PDP. We will fight, because in
this battle, there is no retreat, no surrender. We will
not take any prisoner of war. It will be total battle,”
he said.

When you are trying to get healthy and lose weight, there are certain foods you should avoid. Most of these food are obvious because they contain ingredients known to cause weight gain. There are some foods not as obvious and can be just as bad for you. These foods are a problem because most people do not know how to avoid them and therefore consume them more often than they should. Here are five such foods you should never eat again.
White bread
White bread is a local staple but the truth is, it doesn’t have any nutritional value. It contains a lot of sugar and isn’t as filling as desired.
Substitute your white bread for whole grain or whole wheat bread when possible. Also substitute bread on your sandwiches with lettuce leaves or whole grain tortillas.
Fried Foods
Many people only associate fried food with fast food restaurants and do not realize they also consume them at home. Avoid frying any meal, consider baking or broiling instead. Fried foods are not nutritious and can cause blood pressure and cholesterol levels to rise. They can also cause you to gain weight needlessly.
Cream-based salad dressings
Salads can be very nutritious but can become unhealthy when covered in cream-based dressings that contain a lot of fat and calories. There can be more calories in your salad dressing than in the rest of your entire salad.
Try oil-based salad dressings instead. They taste lighter, and have less calories.
White rice
Rice is a common staple but the truth is, white rice can cause your body to store fat when it doesn’t need to. It also has no nutritional value. Local rice (Abakaliki) and brown rice is the best option because it is full of fibre, vitamins and nutrients. It will also keep you satisfied longer so you are less likely to overeat.
High fructose corn syrup
High fructose corn syrup can quickly cause you to gain weight and even make you have cravings for more sugar and sugary foods. Overeating sugary foods and foods that are high in fructose corn syrup can even lead to diabetes and other health problems. Avoid processed sugars and opt for fresh fruits and berries.
- See more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/09/5-foods-you-should-not-eat-again/#sthash.YF2xQv6Q.yED9x9iN.dpuf

UMUAHIA — THE Academic Staff Union of Universities, ASUU, has lashed out at the Information Minister, Labaran Maku, for saying Nigeria would shut down if the Federal Government conceded to the demands of university teachers.

ASUU described the minister’s statement as a careless utterance, and urged Nigerians to ignore him.

The union in a statement by Zonal Coordinator, Calabar zone, Dr. Charles Ononuju, said Maku was ignorant of the agreement between it and the Federal Government.

It asked Maku to apologise to Nigerians for such unguarded comments and warned him to stop playing politics with the future of the Nigerian child.

ASUU said: “Nigerians should ignore the careless utterance by the Minister of Information that the country will shut down if ASUU’s demand is met. It seems the minister has not seen or read the 2009 ASUU/FG agreement.

“The country has not shut down with constant government wastages and billions of dollars being stolen. The minister should apologise to Nigerians for such unguarded comments and stop playing politics with the future of Nigerian child.”

- See more at: http://www.vanguardngr.com/2013/09/strike-information-ministers-statement-careless-says-ASUU/#sthash.vBp2eIps.dpuf

Leaders of the Atiku's rebeling Peoples Democratic
Party (PDP) group has come up with another threat
that they will begin a move to impeach President
Goodluck Jonathan if he refuses step down or declare
to them that he will not contest for the office of the
President of Nigeria in the 2015 Presidential election.
The PDP rebels claimed that they have started to
compile signatures in both House of Representative
and the Senate to move against the President if he
refuses to meet the four conditions that Atiku
Abubakar lead group gave to the President last week.
“We are demanding that he publicly renounce any
ambition to run a second term or face impeachment
in the National Assembly. The choice is his”, Atiku
group said. They want the President to take an
undertaking that none of them will be arrested or
tried by EFCC for any corruption charge.
The rebel PDP has 6 Northern Governors and
Amaechi, 20 Senators and 57 PDP members in the
House of representatives as members.
In 2007, Atiku Abubakar left with some state
governors, members of the National assembly and
some bigwigs of the Ruling PDP party to ACN and he
was roundly beaten in the presidential election.
Atiku abandoned those he left PDP with in 2007 to
their own fate and begged to be re-admitted back to
PDP in 2010.
Three weeks ago, Alhaji Atiku Abubakar through
some of his aides registered the PDM as a Political
party with INEC.

Am a christian...jumpin out of †ђξ thread asap

Just a simple question....I enjoy non alchoholic wine ǻn̶̲̥̅̊ԃ ma best drink is eva wine...what's yours??

How does it affect d price of garri...no longa used,first to comment,hardly used...now d latest slangs na END TIME TINZ....

ASUU see i must graduate dis yr o! make una just respect unaself...

i detest dat dull kald tonto dike..

zoology

summary pls.....

i want abubakar head.....

dis one wey my tecno dey hot so.....hiaaaa make e no blow scata my hand o.

hello nairalanders....it really beats my imagination wen i hear pipu say wen some piple die,they still change location to continue living....du u rili tink dis is truly possible?pls share ur view.....

d worst i saw was d username grave digger......chai.......

Lordave: ah ah! Why you come wear bed-sheet, your clothes dirty?

dats d latest fashion frm adidas o

ASUU na wa oooo

tales by moon light......

#team brazil

abpatrick

ATM-CARD:
.Did u send this post thru hand written?Or u hv gone out ur sensez?

e be like say ur brain de unda ur armpit.....cybercafe or computer connected to an internet source nko?...not ur fault sha..u used to fone fone fone........mtchew

na waaaa oooooo

chelsea go hammer next season......we gat wat it takes.......welcom BOSS

stupid babangida...i hate u wit passion for killin mt dad....sobs

The 48-year-old Phetole Selepe, from Dan Village
outside Tzaneen in Limpopo, South Africa claims
he is Jesus Christ and was sent by the ancestors
to save the world.

He has been living on the banks of the Letaba
River since 2004, where he conducts his rituals.
The local municipality has failed to evict him and
he has been arrested more than eight times. But
he is “untouchable” because apparently he is
being protected by a mamolapo, a large w ater
snake.

He believes he can bring people back from the
dead and will one day lead his people to Canaan
and wash away their sins. Phetole doesn’t have
an ID document because he has “many
identities”.

He said he uses one of his names, Molalatladi, to
control the world, blocking people’s progress if
they don’t follow his orders. He said he realised
he was Jesus in 1999!
“I was ordered to leave my family and come here
to help the lost and suffering. I’m not allowed to
fall in love with a woman and I can only eat
bread, fish and bananas. I want the government
to turn the place I’m living in into a museum. I
tried engaging the municipality about this and
told them I can give power to senior officials in
the government. I’m carrying the spirits of all the
people who died in horrible accidents,” he said.

MODS. FRONTPAGE PLS

A nigerian baker identified as TOSAN JEMIDE has made history for making the tallest cake in africa..
Jemide unveiled the unique cake design at silverbird galleria in Victoria Island lagos state, Nigeria..
The cake hits the [b][/b]Guiness book of World Records at a gigantic height of 26-feet from the ground..

CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!