₦airaland Forum

You didn't insult me or anything like that. Do you want me to act nice or do you want me to tell you the truth? Truth hurts so I have had my dissapointments with women and I have learned from it. Just like you would be hurt by this situation and you will have to learn from it and be able to act smarter.

You need a lot of time to do a lot of thinking. But it will take time before you will feel okay about it. But the worse could have happened. So you should be thankful in some ways.

To:yaKadijat:

I understood your point but green card is not citizenship. You hooked up with him when he had his green card not when he already have his citizenship. I am not blaming you or the guy. I am also not saying the guy did a good thing. I am just saying he did something bad that any careless lady could have fallen victim. You cant trust his friends in this issue. You can only go by your instints and hear what his enemies have to say. His friends already know the deal so they wouldn't want to screw him up. His enemies are the ones that can give you some info. that might be helpful. How could you have prevented this issue?

1] You could have visited his parents back home and ask questions but you didn't have the cash. Maybe you weren't ready to settle down. Marriage is not a joke so you need to be ready for it emotionally and financially. Assuming you went to nigeria, his family may lie to you but their neighbors will not. You could have told him that you will be going to nigeria to meet his family and verify with his neighbors to see if he had any wife just incase even though you don't plan just to see how he will react to it. You don't expect him to tell you the truth, you just have to use your insticts to put the truth together. I think this is the one spot you missed big time. I know I can think of one or two but this is a big part. Hooking up with some one who already have their citizenship and going home to his village is what you missed.

To: IyaKadijat:

I am not generalizing I am just telling you like it is. Some times when things are like over %99 you just have to generalize. I know there are a lot of black American females that use nairaland. Most of them have African parents. So because they are not responding simply means they agree with that statement.

Since you want to know I will tell you. Most black American women are hoes. They would sell their body to pretty much any one that have money, dress nice and drive a nice car. Not only that they don’t mind having babies with different fathers so that they can collect child support and food stamps and all that bullshit. They make poor judgment when choosing a man or the so called boyfriend. Most of them have no shame. They always reject the men that care about them and welcome men that will break their heart with open hands. 

Most black American women play hard to get when it comes to African men. They act as if we are two different race. They always have this unknown anger as if African men played a role in slavery. They are so difficult that they don’t know their role as a woman. Most of them lack respect, humility, honesty, good behavior etc. I think black American women will be more desirable as a woman if they know the roles of a good woman.

Their attitude is beyond believe. Their nasty attitude most of the time blocks their beauty. They feel like a man can not shut them up.

I am not saying white women are options. I am just saying that African men are in high demand by white women.  As for African ladies lets just say Nigerian ladies to be specific because my attraction for them is different compared to most Africans. For most Nigerian women in the U.S. I mean those that were born in Nigeria but live in the U.S. I don’t really find most of them attractive. Their behavior is excellent but their beauty as a woman is lacking. Most black American women are really pretty but lack good behavior. I have seen a lot of Nigerian ladies in Portland not even bothered with their physical beauty as a woman. I mean no one wants a woman that doesn’t look sexy. I wonder what they do with their money because I have seen a lot of sexy black American woman and rarely a sexy Nigerian woman. I have been to a lot of Nigerian parties so don’t even come up with the idea there is not enough Nigerian women in Portland. That maybe why nigerian parties in portland are so boring. Nothing nice to look at. There are more Nigerian women compared to Nigerian men in portland and still most Nigerian men I know go for the white ladies. So I think Nigerian women need to learn how to be beautiful, sexy and professional and black American women need to learn how to behave. Their attitude sucks.


I would prefer a woman that is sexy, professional and have a good behavior. No guy wants to go out with a lady that is not sexy or some one that might get into a fight with him or some one else on a date.

What he did was bad but lets not just throw all the blames at him. Could you have prevented this? The answer is yes. What I always tell people is take charge of your stuff and stop the idea of when something goes wrong the other person take all the blames. When dealing with most Nigerian men is likely they want citizenship. So this is a list of things you have to do when dealing or want to marry a Nigerian in the U.S. This is only if you don't mind a heart break.

1]Verify that he have a citizenship [see the documents]
2]Within a year or so take a vacation to Nigeria to meet his parents and ask questions, over verify that he doesn't have a wife waiting for him to get his citizenship. Most Nigerian men do have wife back home. Is the White man that caused them to use you for citizenship. Using an american for citizenship sounds like the only option and nigerians know how to use their only options well.
3]Call his family back home once in a while and keep asking questions
4]Tell him that you know that most nigerian men use americans for citizenship and that you want him to vow wether he is using you or not
If you follow this steps one by one is likely you will not fall a victim but for me I think this is not enough but is likely to give you clues to wether he is using you.

If you are some one who don't take chances obviously poster you are not. But just in case you don't want to repeat the same mistake. My advice to any american that want to marry a nigerian in the U.S. is to marry some one that already have their citizenship. Period. That's the solution to this.

As I am writing this I know 1 or 2 people who are using american women for citizenship. Is not like these men are heartless. Well technically they are but the white man put them in that situation and any careless woman will fall victim is just that simple. If I were in this nigerian men shoes I would probably pay the woman to get my citizenship than use her because if I use her there is a bigger price to pay when the time comes. Some people may say no woman would take your money to give you citizenship. I think if there is one way to get something, there is probably another way to get the same thing. It might be legal and it might not be.

Poster I think you are kind of in a mess considering your situation but is not the end of the world. It wouldn't be nice to fall victim to this again in the name of not wanting to be lonely. I will probably say you relocate to another neighborhood or another city. Take time out and think. Change some of your ways and the kind of man you want. If you act like a victim or act like you are desperate men will use you and dump you. If you act mature and dress professionally, you will attract good men.

Remember this dude is your worst enemy nor matter what.

Because they are more likely to think they are all that. Most of them are hoes, drunks, and will remain single with their party girlfriends until they are too old for a guy to look at.

Seriously they think they are all that when in fact they are not. They go around behaving like hoes and expect to get royal treatment. When I say Black American women I meant those black ladies that were born in the U.S. Come on Black ladies, you can't afford to play hard to get in this day of age when White ladies are lining up just to go on a date with african guys. Y'all need to get your shit straight fast. Before you die single and lonely.

To:Landwin and Ijeoma:

It looks like you two bitches don't have shit to say. What the Zap. do y'all got to say. Punks

There is nothing wrong in scamming people as long as you don't get caught especially when you are scamming white people.

If you do all this for her she will leave you for a bad boy. Guys take note.

Hey poster seriously what kind of advice do you want. You have prety much two options. If you want HIV stay with her and if you don't want HIV let her go is just that simple.

You got to give him some credit you know. This song is complete bullshit.

Agree %100. I think is more of greedy rich Whites. The new recent arrest. This greedy rich White man named Madoff stole billions of dollars of peoples money.

The only thing wrong he did was getting caught

Don't do it. Devil wants to punish you. If you break up the relationship there is a chance you will love some one more than the way you love this person in question. Love is not everything. Remember to have a good relationship you need more than love. So why suffer just because of love?

I don't think the world is going to end because of your stupid thread. Are the daughter in question. Find something else to do if you can come up with something sensible. The world might end soon but not for that reason.

What's up poster? Are you girl [A]. You sound desperate like girl [A]. If you want good advice you need to come out straight. You got nothing to loose.

Is true but you chose to let it bother you. Best thing is to remove your self.

Valentine day is for kids. Tell you kid boyfriend to stop being a bitch and get his shit together.

Igbo is the language spoken by the tribes of people that live in Imo state, Enugu, Anambra, and some neighboring states
While
Ibo is the tribe or group of people that speak Igbo.
This is simple, I don't know why educated people keep making the same bullshit mistake when refering to Ibo people.

Abortion is not an option. This Nigerian mugu you are talking about is not man enough. He can pregnate some one but not man enough to take responsibility, that's bullshit. Assuming there was some kind of smartness in him he could have used protection or something. Make sure he gets ready for child support or lock his ass up in jail. The child have a right to be taken good care of.

Hey poster, there is nothing wrong with yahoo boys[Hustlers]. They are just getting what the White man took from them.

As for a marriage between a Nigerian and a White person I suppose you meant. There is a possiblity it will work but the chance is not encouraging.

I know everybody is different so what works for one will not work for another. But I know women like to be loved, cared and protected by the man. Any man who can do that and be faithful will have a successful marriage. Ancient times have proved all this. I don't need modern psychology to learn about love, I just need to know how it was done in the olden days.

Most people I know do the court marriage first to be able to live together and have kids and when they get enough dollars then they have the big wedding.

Mr. poster you shouldn't be afraid unless you are not ready for marriage. Going to court also make your marriage legal which means to break it you have to have your lawyer do the paper work and if you make more money than hers. You would have to divide your assets by two. With your worthly goods remember that line in marriage? Yep. I don't even remember the rest. Women remember every line.

My thing is, if you are getting married you should know your partner very well. I mean you should know him/her more than your parents. If you don't you are joking. If you are afraid of her taking advantage of your wealth maybe you don't know her. If you know her as a gold digger and you still want to marry her, well you should know the outcome, she will dump you and run with your cash when the time comes, is just that simple.

To:Kayusa or whatever:

Who the Zap. are you to tell me what to do? You don't have that privilege to do so, get it into your feminist head. I don't curse women ok. I curse those that need it, people like you and also those that make lame assumptions like you. You know Portland Oregon very well abi? If you do I am sure you know the correct spelling is Oregon not Oregun. You see, you don't know Poo. and you are coming here to teach me something. Seriously what can some feminist bastard like you teach me? So, Zap. you and your lame assumptions.

Get a life bitch.

I am not saying don't marry my African beauties. What I am saying is don't buy into the idea of modern slavery by the village elders. There are good families with good standards who will not demand any thing or even something small and there are also many gold diggers [419ers] who are willing to bankrupt their new son inlaw to be as long as he paid them a lot of naira and kobo and is even worse when they know the guy lives abroad.

In true love, money is not an issue. If you disagree, you have been messing with the wrong gold diggers.