₦airaland Forum

Yimu, na today!

AKswift:
You can’t be stranded in your country joor! Una won Japa.....lol.

Japa wetin? The summit is holding in Ghana!

It is not a UN related program but if they insist on going they should take a bus to Lagos then another bus to Accra.

Lawyers be giving him hope!

Nelsonmoney:
The solution he was trying to seek brought this problem of the girl being his problem

He wants to part ways, will the lady go with their son or your aunt intends to be the boy's care giver?

BarrElChapo:
You didn't read where he said he lost 5yrs in the Uni baa.. Smh

I read that, just as I know someone who had to leave LAUTECH (Ladoke Akintola University of Technology, Ogbomosho) at the age 23 after 4 years there due to the lengthy closure of the school. Even coming from a far less affluent background in comparison to the OP's background found his way to a private university in Nairobi, where fees is about the same paid in Nigeria and without financial assistance from family nor engaging in illegitimate activities, he is resourceful enough to earn to pay his way through school at age 26.

Far younger people are fending for themselves, he has to be creative on how to earn more income from his business which he noted he has, as one do not need to first have a university certificate before he/she can do so, likewise his younger sisters while hoping their father comes around.

Truth be told, at 27 you are a full blown adult who should be fending for himself.

Poor parenting and running away from responsibility. What is the possibility of girls who are married off at 16 attaining university education?

grandstar:
The best you can do is to take the child away from such a parent. Once you believe your child is out to destroy you, you'll hate that child with passion.

Yes, it is the child's best interest to be taken away from such parent while parents punished for such cognitive distortions as there must be deterrent.

It seems parents who accuse and abandon their children are not being prosecuted and jailed thus the reoccurring incident.

Hmm...this same BBM some did irreparable things to own!

The Pastor and his sheep are mentally disordered.

Ugosample:
it's our curse as igbo men

wanting to carry ungrateful relatives along at our expense


it's terrible

Very Igbo!. Some of us seek "validation" from it at the expense of our nuclear family well-being but ironically we tend to "respect from afar" relatives who don't give a hoot about carrying the weight of their extended family members and when these type of people drop something once in a blue moon, these ungrateful relatives tend to appreciate it more than you that have been offering it regularly!

Disheartening

grafixdon:
Receive sense brother. Don't be too quick to call someone weak when you don't know the story. I have a aged mother. She has lost many of her children in the past (my siblings) I don't want to cause her more grief. That my brother can do it, he has drank bleach before and have attempted many suicides.

He's very handsome but find it difficult to steak with one woman, he doesn't have a good job, he stays in one room self contained. He's not doing well as such, sometimes he thinks the best is to end it.

I now understand better where you are coming from. If he has attempted many suicides there is certainty he can finally pull one through.

You can help your brother seek psychotherapy, for his life to have meaning to him and the financial assistance you give him to make sense. Cognitive behavioural therapy as an intervention will help him and you at the end.

Ugosample:
Nigerians are NOT good people

I keep saying it.

if you see the way we exploit and deal badly with each other, you will marvel

now see that innocent man's kids now suffering

Men who still spend on their siblings and nephews/nieces, hoping they would cater for his children should he be no more are surely living in a fool's paradise.

Set up trust funds for your children, no matter how little, so that your children' education would not suffer in the event of the man's demise as am so tired of stories of " daddy died....dropped out of school...all those daddy helped ignored us"!

grafixdon:
This's so true. Infact I'm fed up. I've a brother who is always threatening suicide whenever I refused to give him money a 39years old brother. The last time he called me, he said this's going to be our last conversation, that he'll be gone in the next 2hrs..why? Because I asked him to account for the 120k I gave him some months ago.

He blackmail me all the time with suicide, he knows I care so much for the money, they think I've money.

Is there a way you can get to sit down with your brother in the presence of respectable family members and bring up the recurring threat of suicide. Once you make it clear to him in the presence of others that he cannot continue to blackmail you into being financially responsible for him, he would lose his hold over you.

GoldHorse:
Person wey sabi! 7 gbosa for you!

I was experiencing bloating and googled for natural remedy, it came up. Got it for $5 and now feel at ease having it around me.

Insightful. Family members give wide berth to those who stick to not being an ATM. Your income is primarily for your immediate family, be up to date with your health insurance, life assurance, investments etc whatever remains one can choose to extend to extended family members.

Just this afternoon, I was thinking of a neighbour of ours back in the 90s who was like his extended family's "messiah", he was catering for his brothers' families as his 2 elder brothers had 15 children between them. By the time he got married in his early 40s, his finances were plummeting, health issues arose and died within 7 years of being married leaving the wife with 3 young children. From 3 bedroom flat apartment to one room, the wife had to start selling food at the bus stop, while her late husband's nephews and nieces who were by then earning comfortably were least bothered.

It still baffles me how some parents still feel comfortable at this time and age with seeing nothing wrong in their minors going to watch TV in their neighbour's house!

GoldHorse:
Please keep Activated Charcoal at hand and at home. It can be used prevent death in cases like these (and for most types of poisons) if used on time.

Quite useful if you have kids or pets. I don't even know why it is not made a Compulsory item in the first aid box.

Have it in my cabinet, very potent.

Make I laugh.

It will not stand.

Ring.....with our level of superstitious beliefs?

Photos of it during the day.

It will reach a million!

Uncontrolled births with no provisions end up being a security risk.

halhassan1:
This is the real question .
The children bear the brunt

Feel for them.

Sad. The woman is now altered forever, the man is certainly taking up residence in prison while their children end up where?

It is not easy.

In as much as we have rights, when dealing with those mentally deranged individuals in the Nigerian Police Force "Wisdom is profitable to direct" simply means that applying prudence is very important.

Douglaufuoma:
graduated as a psychologist 2011, started my master in clinical psychology in 2014. I did one year internship in did different organisation namely, therapeutic day care in Enugu, Enugu state university teaching hospital Enugu and their psychiatric hospital in emene, Enugu prison all in Enugu state. I would have round up my master but a fatal accident I had 2016 that almost took my life slow me down, I suffer four fracture but no amputation. though I have recover now, I only have my final defence standing between me. I have been under the guidance of the school clinicians with freedom since 2017 to practise in the school clinic

Thanking God on your behalf that it didn't get to the level of amputation. How many hours of supervised clinical experience do you have?

Auxtin85:
He actually deserves to be helped, but you have confused everyone with your post, what stops you from typing in a simple English?

Not everyone understands your Latin

Such irks me. Those who are very close to me knows I don't reply to such style of writing.