Ronald4lif's Posts

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Romance › Re: Xmas Fete[pool Party][lagos] by ronald4lif(m): 10:42pm On Dec 23, 2015

Darkenedrebel, good idea and hope it turns out fun and indelible for every participant.

But I have a concern and it is about the price. While I'm aware the fee is to offset the hotel management charges and little refreshments as the case may be, I think it's exacting and slightly on the high side.

Times are hard and the biting economy might affect the turn out which could hamper the fun as the more the merrier. Is there any way to renegotiate the attendance fee? Just my thoughts and I hope you take it in good faith.

2 Likes 1 Share

Politics › Re: Army Has Met December Deadline Of Defeating Boko Haram – Lai Mohammed by ronald4lif(m): 9:35pm On Dec 23, 2015

I think it's high time Buhari call this man to order. His gaffe and loquaciousness is becoming unbecoming and doesn't portray his government in positive light. Mr. Mohammed must be called to order or he'd continue to unconsciously deride the APC. WTF! undecided

1 Like 1 Share

Family › Re: Nigerian Men And Their Foreign Wives. A Must Read. by ronald4lif(m): 8:59pm On Dec 23, 2015

daretodiffer:

You do not treat second generation Africans the same way you treat westerners. You treat them like you would treat your average African woman. And call them names because they don't behave African enough. Don't you think you are being unfair to them?

I admitted that I feel rued in my opening remark and I do think it's unfair. You may want to refer to my initial comment for confirmation.

Be that as it may, I think I'm a slave to my African acculturation and some environmental factors influences such behaviour. I also want to point out that in light of this eye popping and inspiring article I may change even though it's a onerous task I must say.

But una too dey stubborn so make una change too o mbok. grin

1 Like

Travel › Re: Nigerians Abroad Sent $21Billion Home In 2015 by ronald4lif(m): 7:57pm On Dec 23, 2015

Babprosper20:
whr d money dem enter? yahoo boys

Ignorance is never an excuse to be psychedelic. Your seemingly lack of exposure and retrogressive mentality shouldn't also be a pretext for your outright display of profound foolhardiness, insanity and imbecility.

While I understand the fact that the incessant hardship and callous rape of our common patrimony by Nigerian leaders might have affected your mental proficiency and misled you into erroneously assuming that every Nigerian abroad is into sharp practices but I do however, on behalf of all hard working diaspora Nigerians, take an exception from this brazen unwarranted attack on us and implore you to think before making a nuisance of yourself in public fora. Chump.

3 Likes 1 Share

Family › Re: Nigerian Men And Their Foreign Wives. A Must Read. by ronald4lif(m): 4:14pm On Dec 23, 2015*

bukatyne:
@Bold;

I thought that was the standard behavior going through posts on NL.

@Bold,

Where do you think Nigerian women are missing it?

Nigerian women overly panders to gossips and inordinately petrified with the idea of living a single life. This has hightened their fears and has caused unnecessary panick among them thus they'd do anything to bear Mrs and would swallow whatever get ditched their way by their partner. The Nigerian woman must realise that they don't need men to live a fulfilled life and must cease from pandering to societal prejudice.

This is not to undermine the importance of companionship but it mustn't be a conduit for sorrow, misery and unwarranted abuse.

And do you think this really resonates with the society? Look for example at the advices given to women in troubled marriages. What is the solution?

I'm more inclined to think the society bears a higher chunk of the blame than women. I think women are just victims of societal irrational gender discrimination and male chauvinism. Nonetheless they have a share of the blame too as they shouldn't let the society define them and what they stand for.

The advice given to women in troubled marriages is laughable and an utter disgrace to say the least. Top of the insanity is the appeal for them to pray and plead with their husband regardless of what he may have done. Arrant codswallop.

I've a relation who got wedded not too long ago and it turns out that her hubby started abusing her verbally and consistently hound her with the trauma that he doesn't give a damn about marriage and can quit it without any recourse to her feelings or what people would say.

His infantile emotional threats must have borne out from the Nigerian alpha male notion that a woman would never entertain the thought of a divorce and would do everything to 'please' the hubby. It was a calculated attempt to manipulate her emotions and make her succumb to all his biddings.

While this was ongoing she on her part shielded the whole heist from everyone in a bid to see if things will get better. And prolly what people might say even as she didn't want to leave her home coz of what my mum would say and didn't want to hurt the poor woman.

As fate would have it, I was having a chat with her and she revealed to me what has been going on. I became really angry and told my brothers about it, and we immediately told her to pack all her personal effects and leave the house instantly. Had to tell a cousin and one family friend to go assist her as they reside in the states and to forestall any further abuse.

Long story cut short, the hubby on returning home never met the wife. It dawned on him he wasn't dealing with the average Nigerian in-laws and had to start apologising making all kinds of attempt to make amends. At the end his family had to travel down to Nigeria to sort things out with my mum to pacify the situation. And since then no more of such emotional blackmail as their home has improved.

I'd like to add that while this was happening my mum's only concern was the shame and embarrassment this would cause her and what people in the village would say. As the typical Nigerian mother she didn't spare a thought to the well-being of her daughter and if she's happy in her marriage but rather what inconsequential people will say. Laughable isn't it?

What this means is that if not for the kind of brothers she had and people who normally don't bow to societal prejudice we'd have adviced her to stay put in her marriage and 'obey' her husband. I tell you it's crazy out there what women go through in the name of marriage. It's sickening.

Modified:

What does the OP even mean by 'treating better?

I would have to read through again to give an informed opinion on what she meant. A bit occupied atm and would tag you if I have anything to add. Cheers.

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Family › Re: The Travails Of Marrying Late by ronald4lif(m): 3:31am On Dec 23, 2015

How did miss this thread when it was fully active huh

Family › Re: Nigerian Men And Their Foreign Wives. A Must Read. by ronald4lif(m): 2:36am On Dec 23, 2015*

Hmmm, interesting piece.

I can confirm, albeit regrettably, that I'm guilty of some this cold-hearted disposition when in an amorous affair with a Nigerian and when with non-Nigerians.

Why I act the way I do is something I can't tell exactly but I think it has been firmly established and subconsciously intrinsic in my blood, apparently due to my upbringing and environmental influence.

A Camerounian aphorism would say every tumbu (tape worm) get e own palm tree wey e dey enter. Nigerians would say shoe get size. What this roughly means is that, people are cognizant of the fact that it's not everyone they can treat with utter dismay and not everyone can entertain their unscrupulous attitude, so they treat different individuals based on their fundamental scruples and standards.

Women are usually responsible for the way they're being treated. From the inception of an affair before it even get to marriage a woman should be firm with her principles and never condone any attitude they think goes against her boundaries.

Like the writer succinctly wrote, women in the western world have strong regards for themselves, believes in fair play and they won't bend their rules for anything. Men on their part have realised this fact and would abide by these rules as they're aware their ass would be kicked out faster than the speed of light should they misbehave.

While I'm not advocating for divorce, divorce isn't entirely bad like the Nigerian society portrays. Women (and men too) shouldn't eat sh1t coz they want to stay married against all odds and shouldn't bother about what people would say. 'Jobless' people will always talk whether you're married infinitely or not, they must have something to keep their sad lives entertained.

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Romance › Re: Girls And Their Misinterpretation Of Come To My House(guys Have Ur Say) by ronald4lif(m): 12:50am On Dec 23, 2015

rheether:
If a guy ask you to come to his house, go there with your friends•

Yimu.

Romance › Re: Romancelanders Beach Party 2015 Thread!!! by ronald4lif(m): 12:44am On Dec 23, 2015

Romance › Re: What Could Be Done? by ronald4lif(m): 12:39am On Dec 23, 2015

How long have you dated her and how much do you spend averagely on her in a month. Let's start from there.

Romance › Re: Guys Stop Doing This!! by ronald4lif(m): 12:34am On Dec 23, 2015

I don't know which is more worrying, the fact that the write up is useless or that the OP thinks it's FP worthy. What nonsense. undecided

1 Like

Romance › Re: PHOTO: When You Pay 50k For Asoebi by ronald4lif(m): 11:54pm On Dec 22, 2015

Omo, that chop pass 50k o. So he's eating in arrears. grin

Romance › Re: Ghana & Nigeria Student In UK College Suspended 4 Fight On Origin Of Jollof Rice by ronald4lif(m): 11:51pm On Dec 22, 2015

Pishure of his broken teeth or... sad

Romance › Re: Say Your Christmas Wishes To Someone On Nairaland (2015) by ronald4lif(m): 4:15pm On Dec 22, 2015

martineverest:
thanx, bro.... Thanks for all the relationship tips and tutors u gave throughout the year. They were really helpful

Hahaha, see psyching. Omo me na learner o. grin

All good though.

Romance › Re: Say Your Christmas Wishes To Someone On Nairaland (2015) by ronald4lif(m): 3:28pm On Dec 22, 2015

Mzztega, Martineverest, Sugarbee, Slimzjoe, robosky02 etc thanks guys for the wishes and I wish you all and everyone the best of the season.

Romance › Re: When A Girl Ask You This....! by ronald4lif(m): 4:53am On Dec 22, 2015

YourMain:
It's not even self esteem issues yeah. Obviously she's not asking cause everything is going rosy and well it's because something is off. If it's during or after yous have sex it's cause she doesn't want another hit it and quit it guy. We know how you men are when you get what you want ( not speaking from experience ).

And it's not like you males go from top notch wooing and romancing and gradually slow it down to a baseline. For a lot of cases the second you've smashed that's it like. You won't text her as much you won't call her as much. And suddenly everything centres your wants. Obviously with such drastic changes a lady would like to know where she stands and what better way than asking.

But you were wowed that's why you were wooing her in the first place ? If she can keep up the thing that made you want her, why can't keep up what it took to get her. Like it only makes sense, if you wanted her to smash and dash. Obviously she's going to ask you after you've smashed. We can't read minds. We don't know what your intentions are.

And if you wanted a long term thing we still wouldn't know your intentions. Eventually yous will have sex. Obviously she's also going to ask your intentions for her. We just want to know. Are we smash and dash or is this a long term commitment thing.

Miss Bolu, you no dey sleep ni. I laughed really hard with some of the parlance you applied here, you nutter. grin

Hopefully, I'd have a comeback with a robust antithesis during the day as I want to hit the sheets now. It was an interesting discourse and looking forward to a second episode. grin

Romance › Re: When A Girl Ask You This....! by ronald4lif(m): 3:46am On Dec 22, 2015*

Greekgoddess:
Just reading the guys comments above is making SMH

Women r just use nd dump to u guys

Playing with her emotions just to get her into bed wen in her own part she really likes u

Lying to her wen she trusted you

HMMMMMM

Dis is one of the reasons i stopped taking guys seriously

ESPECIALLY NAIRALAND GUYS

You're only scratching the surface by saying when she really likes him without mentioning what ignited, maturated and made it blossomed. When she likes him because perhaps he's loaded and spoils her with gifts like they usually gloat about their boyfriends among their peers, it isn't 'him' that they like but the perks they get.

When ladies have established within their minds and circle that someone who isn't financially buoyant isn't fit to make passes at them needless to request for a relationship then guys too have the liberty and carte blanche to demand for sex. And even if the relationship crumbles at some point it should be seen as a fair play on both sides as all parties expectations were satisfactorily met, only that it wasn't sustainable.

So, no one should lament as it was akin to a business partnership while we employ love as a decoy to shield individualistic vested interest and to masquerade human's genic animalistic nature. You can't 'like' someone coz of the benefits and comfort they can provide and expect them not to get gbenshing in return.

If we're to take into account the law of equity and rectitude sef men are the ones being shortchanged and fleeced of their resources coz the sex was mutually beneficial.

4 Likes

Romance › Re: When A Girl Ask You This....! by ronald4lif(m): 2:23am On Dec 22, 2015*

YourMain:
No no no. I agree there are some girls who don't mind when yous lie and they know it's a lie.

You guys don't behave like the shitheads yous are when you want to get what you're after. You treat us exactly the way we want to be treated and do everything we like. So obviously if you told us something sweet we'd believe you. You guys don't treat us badly Then tell us something sweet expecting us to believe.

So you can't blame us when we believe your lies now can you ? Then we give you want yous want and inside were prayer you still mean all the things yous said beforehand and then the devil comes out.

Well, you guys expect to be treated same way you were being treated when you were being courted, this is unrealistic and quixotic. The need to impress when an affair is being hatched can't be of same pendulum after it has been actualise. The expectation for a man to continually treat ladies nicely after a relationship has been struck should be discarded to avert disappointment.

It's even tiresome and dreary when someone does same thing repetitiously without a change. Let's not also forget that whilst guys are expected to initiate a relationship and impress their women, they too need to be wowed.

It is my believe that a guy with genuine intentions in a relationship would always requite impressionable gestures. But when the lady is withdrawn like its habitual when the relationship was being harnessed, the guy at some point gives up.

It is innate in us to be treat people the way we're being treated, so while ladies make no or little attempt to evoke romance and make their man feel on top of the world we can't sustain it alone, it's mutual efforts.

Now to be thematic to the issue in contention; we may lie at first when initiating a romance but wouldn't want to put up with more lies but questions like the ones highlighted would only fuel more half-truths and deception.

I don't want to call it insecurity but it does appear as if the constant need for validation, appraisal and appreciation by ladies from their man depicts some form of self-esteem challenges. It isn't guys responsibility to augment and snowball ladies self afflicted poor esteem issues, is it?

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Romance › Re: When A Girl Ask You This....! by ronald4lif(m): 11:51pm On Dec 21, 2015

biz2get:
Funny thing is.... In every 100 girl I meet 70 - 90 will likely ask me this question after forking..... Maybe when I want to go the third time and they see there's no love bruh

But thing is.... No matter what you tell them.... They no care of your gibberish

Thank you. It's just like when they ask you in the middle of a steamy romance that's about leading to the 'main thing' if you truly love them or just keeping them for sex. They already know the obvious answer and are indeed longing for the sex but just want it appear as if they're indulging to please you coz of the assurance you gave. We can't be deceived by their antics. grin

1 Like

Romance › Re: When A Girl Ask You This....! by ronald4lif(m): 11:46pm On Dec 21, 2015

YourMain:
we mind if you're lying!!!!

Yes you don't mind. You want to hear the positives and not anything that would ruin the mood. Just like she's asking A what he want from her she's asking B and perhaps C same question, just to feel appreciated as you lots are usually aware we would lie.

It's just like when some of you ask, but why me and not other girls. The anticipated answer isn't something you're unfamiliar with but still want to hear just to feel good. You lots can sincerely tell what a guy true intentions are by his actions without such questions but like they say words easily sway your minds. Especially when they're sweetened.

Romance › Re: When A Girl Ask You This....! by ronald4lif(m): 11:20pm On Dec 21, 2015

Exactly the kind of question I love to be asked by ladies. What do you want from me, who am I to you and similar questions. Just tell her what she want to hear. Sweet stuff, assurance and make her feel on top of the world even if you don't mean them. No be she ask question, she go get a perfect answer.

Fact is, ladies don't really mind if you're lying and they know guys are likely to distort their true intentions but still just love to be sweet talked.

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Politics › Re: Jonathan To Blame For Fuel Scarcity Says Lai Mohammed by ronald4lif(m): 10:37pm On Dec 21, 2015

daretodiffer:
Shifting blame is understandable in this situation. Nigeria is basically ruined. Our economy and foreign exchange rate rely on crude. Obasanjo cleared our debts before he left but now we are heavily indebted. Obasanjo started a program (some kinda of backup plan for a time like this) but Jonathan instead of contributing to it when oil price appreciated, the bastard embezzled almost everything. So we basically have nothing. I doubt if they actually assessed these factors before election ( we have a culture that care less about economic policies)

I don't even want to think about it because don't see a way out for us without austerity measures and economic diversification. The latter, I believe has been Buhari's primary concern. The reason he has been traveling here and there. However that is going to be hard in a country where fools couldn't fix electricity issues before privatising it, where terrorism has no face and corruption is still a big deal.

Hmmm.

Politics › Re: Jonathan To Blame For Fuel Scarcity Says Lai Mohammed by ronald4lif(m): 9:46pm On Dec 21, 2015

Not taking responsibility is a mark of failure and always shifting blames is a sign of irresponsibility. I can't believe this sh1t. Lia(r) Mohammed and his APC cohorts are becoming an irritant and irresponsible by blaming every quagmire on the previous administration.

It's been over 7months since APC took over power and they're yet to come to terms that whatever predicament Nigeria is battling rest solely on their shoulders.

I think we need to remind Mr. Mohammed that Nigerians were cognizant of PDP's misgovernance and devious profligacy hence booted them out and voted for them.

We already know PDP are evil but what we never knew and which has been coming to light is that the APC are no better if blames is all they have for us. Enough of the madness and get your boots on. WTF

Romance › Re: How To Get Urself An American Girlfriend by ronald4lif(m): 9:27pm On Dec 21, 2015

MrsChima:
Is that how you roll in the UK , Mr. Sambo?

Romance › Re: Prons And Cons Of Marrying A Working Class Lady ? by ronald4lif(m): 8:59pm On Dec 21, 2015*

I can only think of one right now and I'd say be ready to have a woman who's opinionated and not a push over.

Working class women have financial stability which is a good thing as they can play significant role in the smooth running of the home finance but then if you're a man with the average Nigerian mentality that women are the ones to cook, clean, nurse and change the baby diapers whilst you sit on the sofa watching football then expect her to serve you dinner I'd advice you have a rethink.

But if you're one who doesn't mind in assisting in the kitchen, preparing dinner often while also performing other house chores including nursing the baby then I suggest you settle for a working class. They're far better and can brainstorm with you on variety of topical issues even as they challenge you on where they think you're wrong.

Unlike house wives who would mostly accede to whatever you say and close-minded coz they're scared of offending you thereby losing grip of their source of livelihood, working class women are very outspoken and can be vital in crucial decision making that could improve the home. I implore you not to be scared mate.

Romance › Re: How To Get Urself An American Girlfriend by ronald4lif(m): 4:51pm On Dec 21, 2015

Oh really? Ipledge10, MrsChima and Pinkycute is this how you roll in Yankee. grin

Romance › Re: Married Ladies, How Do You Cope by ronald4lif(m): 4:48pm On Dec 21, 2015

fartkay:
Really

Ya, mate.

Nairaland General › Re: Adasexie Is Fake (proof Included) by ronald4lif(m): 2:53pm On Dec 21, 2015

Nna, I might be wasting my time in this 9-5 job o. With the number of detectives spiralling on Nairaland seems like it's a more promising and lucrative career. Please who can link me up biko?

Romance › Re: How Much Should Bride Price Be? by ronald4lif(m): 2:22pm On Dec 21, 2015

iAmCharis:
Lol where bride price for cheap like that?

Omo, the babe never wan tell yet o. I don dust my #50 last card to go arrange myself 10 brides. grin

Romance › Re: Married Ladies, How Do You Cope by ronald4lif(m): 2:19pm On Dec 21, 2015

sickstars:
Tanx for d write up
But instead of me to get married nd divorce

I rada nt get married at all

True and I share same sentiments.

Romance › Re: Married Ladies, How Do You Cope by ronald4lif(m): 1:14pm On Dec 21, 2015

sickstars:
Thats why i wud marry a man that suits my life style

I can never marry a man you just talked about

Except if you're to say you can't marry anyone not domiciled in same country as you then I'm unsure what you mean by who suits your lifestyle.

No one who lives abroad reveal to their to-be wives that they wouldn't facilitate their relocation to their base but do actually make them believe that as soon the nuptials are wrapped up they're joining them.

Best bet is just to write off anyone who doesn't reside in your locality for like you said they might end up not suiting your lifestyle. Though there's a thing called divorce if your lifestyle isn't conformed to?

1 Like

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