₦airaland Forum

When a woman calls herself a doormat then men will wipe their muddy shoes on. Is this low self esteem or Loyalty?

ronald4lif:
"We’re saving for our wedding again, although we have a joint Facebook account now.” Says Rebecca.

This is what interest me the most in the whole story. That some women save and contribute financially to their wedding but while in Naija it's widely believed that the funding of a wedding should be rested on the man's shoulder alone while the woman's contribution is to determine what to buy and how classy she want her wedding to turn out even as she doesn't contribute nada. Hope they learn from Rebecca and Western women.

There are many things to learn here but not how to be stupid, once a cheat always a cheat.

Nice one

She should have left him to get his fingers burnt, that would teach him a lesson.

If Nigerians mostly our youths adopt these skills, Nigeria will be a better place because I still feel Nigeria has got lots of opportunities which needs to be explored.

Mental strength takes a long time to develop.
It is the daily practice of pushing yourself to grow stronger, maintaining realistic optimism, and setting healthy boundaries. Mentally strong people don't do things like waste time feeling sorry for themselves or give away their power to other people.
How do you know where you fall on the spectrum? The following 21 signs shows you're mentally stronger than average:

1. You balance emotions with logic. Mentally strong people understand how their emotions can influence their thinking. In an effort to make the best decisions possible, they balance their emotions with logic.

2. You choose productive behaviour. While it may be tempting to make excuses, complain about other people, and avoid difficult circumstances, mentally strong people refuse to waste time on unproductive activities

3. You feel confident in your ability to adapt to change. Mentally strong people know that although change is uncomfortable, it's tolerable. They focus their energy on adapting to change, rather than resisting it.

4. You face the fears that hold you back. While mentally strong people don't need to conquer fears because they have something to prove to others, they do strive to face the fears that hold them back.

5. You learn from your mistakes. Mentally strong people don't hide or excuse their mistakes. Instead, they learn from them.

6. You balance self-acceptance with self-improvement. Mentally strong people accept themselves for who they are, while simultaneously recognizing their need for personal development.

7. You genuinely celebrate other people's success. Mentally strong people cooperate — rather than compete — with those around them. They don't feel as though other people's success somehow diminishes their own achievements.

8. You are comfortable living according to your values. Mentally strong people make decisions with relative ease because they understand their priorities and they live according to their values.

9. You focus on sharpening your skills, rather than showing them off. While some people seek validation from others, mentally strong people are less concerned about gaining recognition. Instead, they're intrinsically motivated to become better.

10. You live an authentic life. Mentally strong people are true to themselves. Their words are in line with their behaviour.

11. You view life's hardships as opportunities for growth. While hardship causes some people to grow bitter, mentally strong people let adversity make them better.

12. Your self-worth depends on who you are, not what you achieve. Mentally strong people feel good about themselves, whether they win or lose.

13. You practice delayed gratification. Mentally strong people view their goals as a marathon, not a sprint. They're willing to tolerate short-term pain when it can provide long-term gain.

14. You bounce back from failure. Mentally strong people don't view failure as the end of the road. Instead, they use their failed attempts as opportunities to gain knowledge that will increase their chances of success in the future.

15. You're a realistic optimist. Mentally strong people are able to look for the silver lining and think on the bright side, but they don't allow their optimistic tendencies to blind them to reality.

16. You accept personal responsibility for your choices. Mentally strong people don't needlessly beat themselves up, but they do accept complete responsibility for their actions.

17. You express gratitude. Rather than exclaim they need more, mentally strong people acknowledge they have more than they need.

18. You focus on what you can control. Mentally strong people are effective and productive in life because they devote their resources to the things they can control.

19. You engage in active problem-solving. Mentally strong people don't dwell on the problem — instead, they create solutions.

20. You're open to learning more from all that surrounds you. Mentally strong people are constantly learning from their circumstances and the people they encounter every day.

21. You work on your weaknesses, rather than masking them. While many people work hard to disguise their vulnerabilities, mentally strong people invest their energy into improving their shortcomings.

INTROVERT:
didn't read all.

I know, the black man is allergic to long sentences that's why it is so easy to hide knowledge from him.

Mastering your money has a lot more to do with psychology and mindset than we might think.


That's what Napoleon Hill preached in his bestselling 1937 book, "Think and Grow Rich," the culmination of his intensive study of over 500 self-made millionaires.

Self-made millionaire Steve Siebold, who has interviewed 1,200 of the world's wealthiest people during the past three decades, agrees. As backwards as it sounds, getting rich often has less to do with the money than the mentality, he writes in his book "How Rich People Think."

Here are 21 mindsets of the wealthy that you could adopt today:

1. Rich people believe poverty is the root of all evil

... while average people think money is the root of all evil.

According to Siebold, there's a certain shame that comes along with "getting rich" in lower-income communities.

"The average person has been brainwashed to believe rich people are lucky or dishonest ," he writes. "The world class knows that while having money doesn't guarantee happiness, it does make your life easier and more enjoyable."

2. Rich people think selfishness is a virtue

... while average people think selfishness is a vice.

"The rich go out there and try to make themselves happy. They don't try to pretend to save the world," Siebold told Business Insider.
The problem is that middle class people see that as a negative — and it's keeping them poor, he writes. "If you're not taking care of you, you're not in a position to help anyone else. You can't give what you don't have."

3. Rich people have an action mentality


... while average people have a lottery mentality.

"While the masses are waiting to pick the right numbers and praying for prosperity, the great ones are solving problems," Siebold writes.

"The hero [most people] are waiting for is maybe God, government, their boss, or their spouse. It's the average person's level of thinking that breeds this approach to life and living while the clock keeps ticking away."

4. Rich people believe in acquiring specific knowledge

... while average people think the road to riches is paved with formal education.

"Many world-class performers have little formal education, and have amassed their wealth through the acquisition and subsequent sale of specific knowledge," Siebold writes.
"Meanwhile, the masses are convinced that master's degrees and doctorates are the way to wealth, mostly because they are trapped in the linear line of thought that holds them back from higher levels of consciousness ... The wealthy aren't interested in the means, only the end."

5. Rich people dream of the future

... while average people long for the good old days.

"People who believe their best days are behind them rarely get rich, and often struggle with unhappiness and depression," Siebold writes.
"Self-made millionaires get rich because they're willing to bet on themselves and project their dreams, goals, and ideas into an unknown future."

6. Rich people think about money logically

... while average people see money through the eyes of emotion.

"An ordinarily smart, well-educated, and otherwise successful person can be instantly transformed into a fear-based, scarcity-driven thinker whose greatest financial aspiration is to retire comfortably," Siebold writes.
"The world class sees money for what it is and what it's not, through the eyes of logic. The great ones know money is a critical tool that presents options and opportunities."

7. Rich people follow their passion

... while average people earn money doing things they don't love.

© Aflo/REX Sheryl Sandberg, Chief Operating Officer of Facebook
"To the average person, it looks like the rich are working all the time," Siebold says. "But one of the smartest strategies of the world class is doing what they love and finding a way to get paid for it."
On the other hand, members of the middle class take jobs they don't enjoy "because they need the money, and they've been trained in school and conditioned by society to live in a linear thinking world that equates earning money with physical or mental effort."

8. Rich people are up for the challenge

... while average people set low expectations so they're never disappointed.

"Psychologists and other mental health experts often advise people to set low expectations for their life to ensure they are not disappointed," Siebold writes.
But, he says, "no one would ever strike it rich and live their dreams without huge expectations."

9. Rich people use other people's money

... while average people believe you need money to make money.

Siebold says the rich aren't afraid to fund their future from other people's pockets.
"Rich people know not being solvent enough to personally afford something is not relevant. The real question is, 'Is this worth buying, investing in, or pursuing?'" he writes.

10. Rich people know the markets are driven by emotion and greed

... while average people believe they're driven by logic and strategy.
"The rich know that the primary emotions that drive financial markets are fear and greed, and they factor this into all trades and trends they observe," Siebold writes. "This knowledge of human nature and its overlapping impact on trading gives them strategic advantage in building greater wealth through leverage."

11. Rich people teach their kids to get rich

... while average people teach their children how to survive.

Rich parents teach their kids from an early age about the world of "haves" and "have nots," Siebold says.
While many people have argued that he's supporting the idea of elitism, he disagrees.
"[People] say parents are teaching their kids to look down on the masses because they're poor. This isn't true," he writes. "What they're teaching their kids is to see the world through the eyes of objective reality — the way society really is."

12. Rich people find peace of mind in wealth

... while average people let money stress them out.

The reason wealthy people earn more wealth is that they're not afraid to admit that money can solve most problems, Siebold says.
"[The middle class] sees money as a never-ending necessary evil that must be endured as part of life. The world class sees money as the great liberator, and with enough of it, they are able to purchase financial peace of mind."

13. Rich people would rather be educated than entertained

... while average people would rather be entertained than educated.

While the rich don't put much stock in furthering wealth through formal education, they appreciate the power of learning long after college is over, Siebold explains.
"Walk into a wealthy person's home and one of the first things you'll see is an extensive library of books they've used to educate themselves on how to become more successful," he writes. "The middle class reads novels, tabloids, and entertainment magazines."

14. Rich people just want to surround themselves with like-minded people

... while average people think rich people are snobs.

The negative money mentality poisoning the middle class is what keeps the rich hanging out with the rich, Siebold says.
"[Rich people] can't afford the messages of doom and gloom," he writes. "This is often misinterpreted by the masses as snobbery. Labeling the world class as snobs is another way the middle class finds to feel better about themselves and their chosen path of mediocrity."

15. Rich people focus on earning

... while average people focus on saving.

Siebold theorizes that the wealthy focus on what they'll gain by taking risks, rather than how to save what they have.
"The masses are so focused on clipping coupons and living frugally they miss major opportunities," he writes. "Even in the midst of a cash flow crisis, the rich reject the nickle and dime thinking of the masses. They are the masters of focusing their mental energy where it belongs: on the big money."

16. Rich people know when to take risks

... while average people play it safe with money.

"Leverage is the watchword of the rich," Siebold writes.
"Every investor loses money on occasion, but the world class knows no matter what happens, they will always be able to earn more."

17. Rich people find comfort in uncertainty

... while average people want to be comfortable.

"Physical, psychological, and emotional comfort is the primary goal of the middle class mindset," Siebold writes. "World class thinkers learn early on that becoming a millionaire isn't easy and the need for comfort can be devastating. They learn to be comfortable while operating in a state of ongoing uncertainty."

18. Rich people expect to make more money

... while average people expect to struggle.

"Don't listen to the naysayers who tell you that life is supposed to be a struggle and that you should settle and be grateful for what you have," Siebold writes on Business Insider. You have to think big. Why not $1 million?

19. Rich people are obsessed with success

... while average people believe obsession is a bad word.

"The truth is wealthy people have a healthy obsession with getting what they want, which includes money," Siebold writes. "The wealthy see business and life as a game, and it's a game they love to win."
Think about what you want and exactly how you're going to get it, advises Siebold. It will take a certain level of discipline to "win."

20. Rich people see money as a friend

... while average people see it as their enemy.

"Most people have a dysfunctional, adversarial relationship with money. After all, we are taught that money is scarce — hard to earn and harder to keep." Siebold writes.
"If you want to start attracting money, stop seeing it as your enemy and think of it as one of your greatest allies. It's a friend that has the power to end sleepless nights of worry and physical pain, and can even save your life. The rich see money as a special friend that can help them in ways no other friend can, and these positive feelings lead them to build a stronger relationship every day."

21. Rich people know you can have it all

... while average people believe they must choose between a great family and being rich.

The idea the wealth must come at the expense of family time is nothing but a "cop out," Siebold says.
"The masses have been brainwashed to believe it's an either/or equation," he writes. "The rich know you can have anything you want if you approach the challenge with a mindset rooted in love and abundance."

oribi:
my bro do ur research

I give up! Too much drama here.

oribi:
I was surprised to see you here again after I chased you out of your previous threads. To all nairalander viewing this thread, I can boldly confirm to you the poster is not anybody but notorious KINGAUTO (fugitive) avoid him like HIV or have yourself to be blame. Gabrielmotors, chinamarket,gab4u,cap211985 and so many monikers are his co-partner in crime. CAVEAT EMPTOR.

So who are the genuine ones we can trust on Nairaland? Cos im new to this section.

gabrielride:
What exactly do you want?

Let me know so I can explain better

I want to know if the clearing cost for cars are fixed. Is there a standard?

gabrielride:
It doesn't work that way bro

So how does it work?

Regarding clearing cost, please feel free to correct me if i'm wrong, "The newer the car the lower the clearing cost"

good morning, are you on whatsapp?

Is butter bad for you?

No, providing you eat it in moderation, like any other kind of nutritious food.

Why are we asking this question?

Butter is rich in saturated fats and a recent study has shown that the supposed link between moderate intake of saturated fats and coronary heart disease does not appear to exist – contradicting about 50 years of health advice.

So what does the latest research say?

It was an “observational” study which means it analysed people’s memory of what they ate and compared this to whether they suffered or died from coronary heart disease, stroke or type-2 diabetes. It found no link between these diseases and saturated fats but did find a link with trans-fats, which are the fats made industrially by the hydrogenation of vegetable oil, for instance to make margarine.

What does that mean?

It does not mean that we can now reach out for the butter dish and forget all previous warnings about saturated fats – even the scientists how carried out the study say this. High amounts of saturated fats in the diet are probably not good for us, but the risk almost certainly varies between people.

So which types of food are good/bad for you?

There is pretty much a consensus on the so-called “Mediterranean diet” being good for us, which means polyunsaturated fats such as olive oil, oily fish such as sardines, fresh fruit and vegetables, red wine, whole grain bread and so on. Foods high in saturated fats, such as milk, cheese, cream, red meat, milk chocolate, coconut milk etc, are probably not as bad for us as we were led to believe, but only in moderation. Foods to avoid (but they won’t poison us) are those containing trans-fats, which experts say were eliminated from the UK food chain about 10 years ago. Traditionally they were used in processed foods like biscuits, crisps, packaged pies and so on.

So is this the definitive line on butter?

Probably not.

it will be nice to include a few prices at least to give us an idea of the price. e.g. the dinning set, bed and the sitting room sets.

Blossom023:
I bought a pressure cooker since last year. I've been scared of pressure cookers, since I was a kid. But today I want to dare myself nd use it to cook beans. Is there any procedure to using a pressure cooker? how do I do it?

What brand of pressure cooker is it? does it use electric? does it have a manual? if not, post a picture.

Please see video below.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=56DAF1jNcSg

@ OP Please give us the Part 2 of this story....

stanisbaratheon:
you didn't get fired, your colleague was not so lucky, your oga retired, you were promoted, and you still say you want the oil job.
Bia what do you want sef??

"Human needs are insatiable"

Good write up . OP you should do more fictional writings.

This job has been taken, Please do not call.

If not for NYSC, I would never have had the opportunity to experience a different culture in Nigeria and also learn a different language. This is an invaluable experience. On this basis, I would not agree with her. I will also like to ask with (no malice intended) did Omotola experience NYSC?

hmmmmmm....... interesting

@ OP If you really want to help people or prevent some other job seekers from getting hurt, then you should name and shame this person. If you have left it in the hands of God then you shouldn't even have created a topic. The reason why Nigeria doesn't move forward is because we do not take the proper steps to complain about injustice. We are a country of all talk and no action.

dokia:
Will Smith slapped an overzealous male reporter at the Men in Black 3 premiere in Moscow. Hollywood’s friendliest star had to defend himself after a well-known prankster pounced on him, trying to kiss him on the lips.
Tags
Celebrity, Movies, Scandal, Russia, Thrills&Spills, Accident, Media
The incident happened Friday on the red carpet at the October Cinema in the Russian capital. The reporter walked over to the MIB star asking for an innocent hug. As Will kindly obliged, the journo literally pounced on him, trying to feverishly smooch the actor, wherever his lips would reach.

“What the hell is your problem, man?” Smith said as he slapped the guy. “He tried to kiss me on my mouth. He's lucky I didn't sucker punch him,” Smith explained to journalists and fans as he moved away from the fanatic reporter.

After the accident a source explained Will’s actions to TMZ saying: “the reporter's mouth brushed up against Will's and that's why the actor reacted so violently. Despite the incident, Will stayed positive…and happily continued to sign autographs for fans and do red carpet interviews.”

Will Smith is famous for his friendly attitude towards fans and journalists, an attitude he may reconsider after this unfortunate accident.

Earlier this week Smith expressed his support of same-sex marriage following President Barack Obama’s formal endorsement of the
institution.

http://smileandtalk.com/2015/08/06/will-smith-slaps-a-reporter-after-he-tries-to-kiss-him-blacktwitter/

old news

Fhemmmy:
Yes, we are on whatsapp and all our contacts are within our signature . . . .Thanks

Thanks for that, My friend will contact you about a car sometime today.

Fhemmmy:
Happy new day . . .

Are you on whatsapp if so please can you give me your no . Thanks

moscobabs:
Thank u sir.

In my former place of work. U will be sacked once the owner heard ( not even confirmed o) u got a car or build a house

Why would you be working for a boss who does not want you to progress?

moscobabs:
Good afternoon my fellow Nairalanders, I just got a new job and I have to resume on 15th of this month.

I have been working as an Audit Officer since 2009 but this new offer is in a manager level but no official car attached for now.

I don't know if is a good idea to take my personal car to my new office since the job is a one man business Job.

One spirit is telling me to take it along because if the Owner of the company latter discover that I have a car he might be thinking that I have embezzle the company fund.While other spirit is telling me not to take it along since I did not drive during the interviews and taking car along might deprive me from getting an official car from the company,It has happened to a friend of mine before

Pls I need your mature advice .Thanks

Cc Seun
All moderators

Your personal car is your personal business, if you have a place to park at work and it is more economical than using public transport then it is non of your boss's business.

aydelicious:
No, but if you want to give me the list of the price,you can give it to me now .

You are offering a service so I will expect you to have a price list for basic household commodities and delivery cost. The websites of companies offering these kind of services are all based in Lagos and the price of the goods are on their site so I would have expected you to have something in place even if you don't have a website.

aydelicious:
if is the place you want want Him to be delivered it to,no problem, He willl fully do that for you.

Have you got a price list?