₦airaland Forum

Note that I am not the author: Thought it would be interesting to share and get some views. . . .crazy world we live in![i][/i]
"i know it's a bit of a heavy topic esp so late in the day, but it's bn bugging me all day. bd has cheated a few times, 3 that i know of, and each time things become sour and then promises to change and does for a while but then it happens with someone else and we've bn thru it 3 times alrdy and i really wonder if he can really truly honestly change? i doubt it. so y am i still with him? he's a good dad,totally hands on, great person and personality, i know he loves me to bits and spends all his time with me-leaves for work in the morning, gets back home straight from work and starts preparing supper etc and he showers me with love, kisses, affection. i don't know, sometimes i think mayb i'm asking too much of him and shud jst b satisfied with what i have, after all his cheating is basically confined to office hours so it's emails/sms's which he sometimes forgets to erase - but it's still cheating and i shudn't accept it rite? i just do not know what to do anymore. he's such a flirt and the thing is his charming, friendly personality always makes him an easy target for the ladies, so it's so easy for him. what do i do? sometimes i just feel like leaving him and moving on with my kids and then i get scared that i might meet someone worse than him? he's really great save for the flirtations really, he is the best, he spoils me rotten with massages,dinner dates, movie dates each atleast once a week and he's so good with our sons. why can't he just stop with the flirtations it's as if he's perpetually seeking something that is lacking in our relationship or me and even though i've told him that it hurts me he seems to stop but then resumes with someone else, he's got lots of female friends-oh the emails and sms's, it used to be worse cos they wud come in at nite as well so atlst now nothing comes in when he's at home anymore, and he's casual with his phone i can check it anytime i want, we are open like that, oh but it hurts to come accross these flirtatious sms's sometimes.oh i just don't know"

Then go for an ugly but clean one! Problem solved!

YES, there are women who don't feel the need to get married, ESPECIALLY to the wrong kind of man JUST to be somebody's wife, some of these women believe in happiness with or without a man.  This kind of woman will happily marry The One but is more than happy to stay single if the one does not come along. . . . .life is way too short for one to "just manage it with a partner you don't fully FEEL but are with because of societal pressures"

This whole marriage thing can't be what completes a woman's existance, surely?  Having said that, it does not mean one's NEEDS are not being taken care of somehow   

Love is a feeling, not a choice!

So OP, sex to you = paying your bills and taking care of you? What is the difference between you and someone who stands at a street corner doing the same thing you ask for? Why do some women hand over their "power" like that? What happened to pride, taking care of oneself and own needs without laying on your back or bending over just to eat?

It is women like you who give Nigerian women and the rest of us women a bad name, what a shame!

LOL@ true love for the next two years Saga, so your love expires like that?

jennykadry:
Mutter

Lol , he saw how well your kids behaved and took a liking to them all, lol was it the money you got from your first marriage you used to take your kids and yourself to deustchland ? did you use the same for your studies as well?

Lol story story, Oh yes I was on call of duty like you call it, to make a life out of life, to get a degree , stand up and believe in myself that I can make it without an abusive husband. yes that call of duty gave me the chance to travel and practice what i HAVE LEARNT AND WHAT I WAS TAUGHT.

That call of duty is the reason I am somebody today who need not lean and crawl on the floor for a man for 5 naira

Enjoy, off I go to take care of important business

@SA
Yea my family matters alot to me not mutter , i got to travel tomorrow and it is already late here, take care of yourself and your cutie pie son for me and remember never stand for less if you know you can achieve more

Love you

No family should mutter, that would be asking for trouble

Definitely can achieve more and don't need la ow life dragging me down. I am bigger than that, a strong black woman who is taking care of her business, with her little prince by her side, making me want to do better everyday.

Mcwaaaaah (cyber hug)

Safe trip

jennykadry:
Lol I am done with her ojare, I have got a family to take care of

Go ahead girl, I will be rushing out in 45 mins to get my son from creche also.

Cheers now!

I must say mutter you have been quite entertaining, never come across anyone try to "buy" class like you have today, it is commendable!  Maintain your class-LESS self girl, it is your brain that makes you classless so no matter how hard you try to potray yourself otherwise, you still get exposed!    

jennykadry:
Ok this got me ROTFLMSGBO

What an innocent but polite reply

Now you got me laughing, she asked me so nicely to mind my language so I had to be civil!        

As for Saga and his human blanket, no central heating can come close to that, Saga smiles through the European winter like he is in sunny Africa!  

jennykadry:
You reckon ehn? ok

But i need to enjoy from sagamite what samantha is enjoying from him, look at her on her bikini, i am sure sagamite does not allow her rest with his wandering hands, me want to take a bite of sagamite too

Sagamite does not need blankets with Samantha around, all Sam needs is food and she provides warmth, hahhahahahaha.

Hey Saga!  

mutter:
Jenny, applause I can see you attended some hours of Goethe

So please ein Betrüger
eine Betrügerin

Sure you learnt the der , die , dass, ein, eine but what comes after that.
Sorry I have no urge to write German, don`t worry about spoiling the thread, just prove you speak the language, then we can continue from there.
Quite honestly. I can back everything I write about myself here with proof. I hope you can do the same.
Quit abuse and deliver facts.
Godess as a single woman you have my respect, I have never written otherwise.
But you really should learn some manners aso you don`t raise your kid with this language you use here.

People like you don't know any better so I speak in a language they understand, it is the only way to get through to them!

It is time Jenny we let them be. . . . . . . . .they deserve each other!

MOBO444:
Hmmmmm a single mother, no wonder you hate black men, hmmm, i should never have crossed your part, still apologise to Mutter,ok.

Goodness MOBODICKHEAD, where did I say I hate Black Men, quit transfering your issues on to me. . . .AND it is not part, the word is PATH.  Please reason with me intelligently and stop saying crap just for the hell of it.  I do not apologise to pricks like you or anyone else for being a single mother, your head is buried in your backside so I forgive you for your ignorance!

What the hell am I apologising to your nutter friend for?  Get over yourself you fool!  Why don't you apologise to her for what I said if you found it so offensive?

I am raising my son alone mutter so there is nothing you can tell me about being a single mother. . . . . . .I will choose my single-parenthood life a hundred times over than be in a loveless, abusive marriage, I leave the abuse for weak women who do not know their worth, don't think they can breathe without a man taking the first breathe, who will encourage their daughters to stay in such relationships "because it makes them stronger" WTF!    Serious self-esteem issues if you ask me!

PS: Next time you and your nutter friend want to start a silly fight, pick on someone else, I am not a walk over!

This mutter madness is something else. . . . . . ,  . . . imagine being called a love-peddler because one is a single mother, I bet you she has a number of abortions under her belt and yet she is going to sit here and judge those whose circumstances she has no knowledge of, she must hang herself with a wet tissue. . . . . . .village fool !

jennykadry:
And she is talking about menopause @38 even when 31 yr old women are beginning to experience menopause, if she was so intelligent she would have known that alot of women experience early menopause

She is just a fool who tries to act knowledgeable but of course gets exposed. . . . .she must just give up and crawl back into her dark corner, fool!

jennykadry:
What maturity? encouraging people to stay in abusive relationships for the sake of money? labelled all single mothers prostitu, tes that sell their bodies for money? feels a man is allowed to cheat as many times as possible and be forgiven but a woman should be stoned to death the minute she looks outside

What a waste of human being

They think alike hence he does not see anything wrong with what the fool has said to me, let them be!  

The  grown  fool (mutter) is actually trying so hard to act classy and mature but she failed dismally!

MOBO444:
SA Goddess i am not happy with your behaviour, maybe you putting up a charade, it not fair you know,Mutter is a decent lady and has always handle things with limitless maturity.

Have you suddenly become my father, do I have to answer to you?  I don't even know why I am responding to this, shouldn't be entertaining you and your friend at all! Air thieves, mcwwwwwwwm!

. . . . .and you forgot to tell that little brat to not piss me off? I will not apologise, don't see what for!

I just can't get past a guy in his early thirties being intimidated by a woman in her early 20's

There are certainly too many classless, brainless idiots roaming NL, you are certainly one of them!

mutter:
Godess do you realise that some women at your age are already Grandmothers?
You want her to start a family with a young man.
How does it look with kids? Even if all works well, she needs about 4 year for two kids, will she have hit menopause b then?
A woman needs a man who is mature and can maintain her.
This young man will just use her, and dump her or keep her by the side as the cow to milk.
Use her money on younger girls

You don't even know how old I am and yet you speak with authority on my age, GTFOH you little piece of shyt.,  NXA!  It's ignorant people like you who let others dictate how you should your life and now you want to do the same to OP, I wonder if you even have a brain of your own to begin with, NXA!

mutter:
If possible look for an older man even if he is divorced or widowed.
I mean you could even opt for second wife it might end up being less painfull for you.
Cindrella, I know she has gone through pains but belive you me so have married women.
It is not easy being married either. You have to sacrifice too when you get married.

All that trouble just to avoid being with a guy that is 5 years younger than him, I can never get the way some of you think sometimes, you let stuff cloud your thinking and you just follow the leader into the sea. . . . .SCARY!