₦airaland Forum

Been ready since last year but been waiting for my fiancée of 7yrs to be done with studies to proceed

2024 seems like that year

Wow

Truth is that no matter what advise you get here, you will still go ahead and marry her

01Deji:
What happed to the Much talked about Russian Air Defense System ?

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Air defenses are designed to spot and identify fast moving objects such as missiles, air craft etc but in this case the world is seeing in Ukraine how those expensive air defenses can be bypassed with small objects.

Ukrainians have mastered the art of drone war by improvising ordinary civilian drones designed to capture photos into deadly weapons

Zelenskyy called for a drone legion and Ukrainians and citizens all over the world get ordinary civilian drones and strap them with bombs and send to soldiers in the battle field.

These drones are two small and air defense systems are not designed to recognize them as threats since they are normal photography drones. so once they get to the border , they move freely pass the air defenses and have been modified to fly hundreds of kilometers deep into the heart of Moscow to target ammunition stores and fuel depots.

All Russians can do is to jam the signals so that the controls won’t be able to fly them again but that in its self is a big tasks because everyday thousands and thousands of these drones are delivered to the battlefield by ukraine citizens that ran to other countries for safety

My family minds their business especially my mom but if she wakes up one morning and decides to blackmail me into marrying who I don’t want and threatens to kill herself if I don’t marry her choice then we will see either in heaven or hell. I will bid her farewell

Lurdd:
It is already December
What are you giving your girlfriends this December to make them feel like they're dating someone that loves them, and also feel special, what are you getting them or what are you going to give her. Is it cash or gifts.

35k for her, 20k for her mom and 10k to be shared between her siblings

Hamachi:
You don't get it, you are in your mid 30's and yet you don't have a landed property yet, think 🤔 about it? Which would you rather do first?
Invest or spend 💰?

What makes you think I don’t have landed properties?

Mrs I said going all out to build because you want to avoid rent payment is a wrong decision that appears like a good one.

You can build a house and avoid rent but what next?

You worked for years to save 25million only to use it to build a house.

Instead investing that money to get passive income to increase your earning , you while excess cash flows goes into the building project

That is the way to go not that which u are proferring

Hamachi:
It's better you build your own house 🏠 than move into another apartment

A bad advice that seems like a good advice.

You don’t throw life savings into a building because you are avoiding rent.

Increasing my income is what should be of paramount importance now. When income increases, there will be spare money to put into building of a house

Ruke1989:
Though beating the woman regularly is strange but you are a woman and just gave us a woman view. If what you said came from a man, I will see it as truth. But women are not known to be very objective because of emotion. The woman can be good. You people should ensure she has a job and can fend for herself and the children before leaving that marriage because that kind of man will not care for the children after divorce

In the event that she remarries she should be financially strong to take care of those children alone. Another man will not do for them what their own biological father refused to do for them

I am a man. We are a family of boys

5 boys and a girl

We weren’t raised to be woman beaters, our dad didn’t even beat us at all talk more of beating our mom.

Only God knows where he leant that attitude from. I am in my mid 30s , the last child and have never raised hands on a woman before talk more of my older ones. Where did he learn his own from?

I have a friend who is a chronic cheat

He cheats on his girlfriend whom he has spent over 9yrs dating

I got to be friends with the girl through my friend on their second year of dating

This friend of mine isn’t well to do, the girl has paid her dues and even sleep on the floor with him and go through hard times with him but why he continues to cheat on her is what I don’t understand.

Atleast if I don’t know, I know three girls he has impregnated but it was terminated.

I know his three present side chicks as we speak.

The main chick everyday complains to me but hey! You don’t expect me to tell you to quit a relationship with my guy.

I say some words indirectly to her and she isn’t catching the clues I give to her to quit that relationship. Over the years I have given her clues upon clues for her to move on and find love elsewhere but I think she is blinded by love and not even catching all the clues

I can’t openly tell you that my guy is doing shit here and there. You see the signs, you know the girls and the pregnancy, I give you clues yet you still sick advise or want me to talk to my friend

Yes I do talk to him Every time but had to stop talking let him as a man make his decisions.

Over 9yrs with someone and in the next 5yrs he doesn’t seem like who still has intentions of settling down with her. To think that his new side chick has taken him to see his uncles and parents , starting marriage talk is disgusting. He is playing the new side chick too and his family

To get married to my girlfriend of 6yrs m
To move to a better apartment
To improve my earning
To complete my asset acquisition that’s all

All blames still boils down to the govt because it is their duty to make use of our taxes and natural resources to provide the necessary amenities and enabling environment for the masses to have sustainable income to progress and procreate

Procreation is a natural survival instincts of every living being be it humans, animals, insects or invertebrates. We’ve seen in some animal kingdoms they fight to death for mating rights just to pass on the lineage

You cannot absorb govt from the blames. Why are you a govt collecting taxes, stopping people from owning natural resources they find on their lands when you cannot make good use of the things you collect from them to better their lives?

In many countries, taxes are put in good use, in UAE the moment a citizen takes in, the govt is responsible for that child until the child becomes an adult even at that they still cater for the adults


You can blame citizens when govt has done their parts but citizens refuse to take advantage of it and stay poor.

In USA there are more rich people than poor people

The poor ones many atimes food, clothes etc isn’t their problem because an average American doesn’t go hungry. Their problem is drug abuse, inability to take advantage of govt provided stimulus etc

But in Nigeria nothing is provided, everything from taxes to natural resources are looted and the people left with nothing

If everyone decides to wait until things are better before they start procreation believe in next 100yrs Nigeria population will reduce drastically and we will face extinction because things will never improve

Nigeria is an animal farm with no laws so never try to behave like normal humans should otherwise you could lose your life

Uyi2017:
Let's put money aside, what else is your guy bring into your relationship?

I use myself as an example

I have been in a 7yrs relationship with my partner and we started off being broke without me even affording N200 to give to her. In fact she was even the one giving to me but I brought everything good on the table in the relationship.

First I was her motivation to Goto school, I encouraged her to get a jamb form while I ensured to coach her (since we couldn’t afford evening lessons), while waiting for admission I still encouraged her to learn a skill (even though me myself was jobless at the time), she heeded and got the money from her parents to register for a skill program, I taught her so many things, especially how to use the computer, send mails etc to prepare her for jobs incase.

Being with me made her ten times a better person, two years into the relationship finally she secured admission and went in with the skill sets she gathered, more exposed, smarter and aware

Luckily for me, I got a job and all through the years my finances grew ( not rich but comfortable and not hungry). Her parents job stopped, couldn’t fend for her in school but the skills she learnt before admission helps her and now I support with money because we have survived the no money phase and I can spend on her knowing she deserves every penny

So yes, without money I bring a lot to the table

Obavoh:
I am not a beggar. It is a loan I will surely pay back. Why can’t he just say he can’t lend me , instead of playing my life like long tennis

For 2yrs you have been asking him for a N600k loan

A whole 2yrs? Shows that you have no intention of paying back.

If you can’t source the 600k elsewhere for 2yrs how then do you intend to raise the money to pay back?

Don’t tell me about any yeye business you want to do with it because it’s all cover up because whatever 600k business idea you had 2yrs ago with the economic and cost of everything in our present economy that money just have doubled

You just feel because your uncle is rich you are entitled to get whatever you want and go free if you fail to pay back and good thing your uncle knows that and is avoiding you

If you truly trust this your business idea, go and take loan from loan apps since you are 100% sure of paying back

youngsum:
Hello nairalanders rejoys with me


Today the 5th of December I received my first salary in life as a fresh graduate which I was employed as a school teacher last month.


Do you think I will be able to get marry with this salary by next December?

Start planning your resignation as quickly as possible because this will keep you poor and frustrated (I don’t mean to be rude , it’s my honest opinion)

Teaching job is the fastest track to poverty especially when it is not from a big school

If you can swallow pride and graduate mentality I’d advise you look for any menial jobs to start

1k you make a day is more than what you just earned plus there is no room for growth but your hustle , you can dictate where you want to be and work towards it

HellVictorinho6:
U think we dont wanna have those papers abi





























May ur children let you understand

Take it or leave it.

You can stay complaining or you can do something about your employability as a teacher

Teaching pays you just haven’t built yourself to earn the pay you seek

Majority of those complaining about teaching jobs are those with maybe Bsc.Edu , Maybe Msc Edu or maybe those who accidentally find themselves in teaching profession after toiling for jobs in their area of specialties but couldn’t find.


Just like in every discipline, you keep building and gathering the necessary qualifications if you have any desire of getting to the top.

I didn’t do education related course but found myself teaching in one very big school in Lagos. Mind you I have just HND with no other qualifications but after searching for job in my field (computer science) I couldn’t find any then I applied in the second as their IT instructor with promise of bringing in my tech knowledge. We were much that came for the same position but me the least qualified was picked after a rigorous interview process.

In the school I discovered that teaching pays because the school mandated all staffs to take several certification courses in education which many teachers took and even went extra miles to get certificates not mentioned by the school (IGCSE, Cambridge, SAT etc) while some others felt relaxed (like me)

Fast forward to two years many teachers secured jobs in very big schools in the country. When I say big school I am talking about paycheck from 500k per month and above while they had access to kids from men at the top of the ladder in Nigeria where they could charge 20k per hour for private lessons.

Some even had teaching jobs abroad while many rejected offers to teach abroad because they get well paid as teachers here.

Govt has to do more to enhance welfare of teachers generally in the country but teachers too should up their skills and make them attractive to foreign and local big schools.


Back to my case, my school was big and very good but I had no passion for teaching so I resigned after saving enough to venture into business which I have always wanted but the skills, experience, training and exposures I had from the school helps me today in business and I am now a vendor to them (business partner.

My certificate remains hnd, I didn’t bother to add to it because I didn’t have intention of chasing teaching lines

The principal of that school should be dismissed with immediate effect because he or she has lost control over the pupils

Staph

Used to be spaghetti but now no more

The curse buhari and tinubu destroyed everything

I have a brother who is a senior pastor in one of the popular churches in the country (name withheld). Over the years he has risen up the ladder in the church hierarchy and is doing well for himself. He is adorned by outsiders but at home he is not the man they think he is.

He has been married for 7years and the union is blessed with 2 lovely kids and all of a sudden he thinks his wife is not good enough and wants a divorce

For years they have been having fights here and there and on several occasion the wife got a black eye. We normally don’t get involved in anybody’s marriage but his case is getting out of hand that we can no longer allow the wife to continue living with our brother.

That lady is a wonderful lady and is the best wife married into the family so far. She stood by him when he was a young pastor wallowing in poverty until he rose up the ranks and now he thinks she is not good enough

We all know that our brother is the problem in that marriage because he is not doing what he is supposed to do. He is nice to others but take care of his home is a big issue

On the last beating she got last night, we all said enough is enough and will grant him the divorce he seeks but none of us will be present in any marriage he seeks to have again

The wife is more like a sister to us and we stand by her and will contribute our quota to ensure she resettles again in life

Today I heard him preach and people praying and shouting, I felt bitter and angry.

I don’t think I can still attend a church he preaches , I am leaving

Inside that 48mil

47.99m na Yoruba pple

I am not trying to exonerate her oooo but I pleading to all men, please try to be around whenever your wife is in labour. Do not assign that responsibility to anyone.

Baby swapping takes place in the hospital. The doctors, nurses are all together in this fraudulent business.

Nigeria ranks high in paternity fraud but not all the frauds boils down to the woman cheating, a good number of that fraud happens at the point of delivery.

I know it is gross to watch your wife in pains, see the blood and also watch her getting cut. Most men cannot withstand the sight of it but please your presence matters not only to support her but to protect your child so you don't go home with a swapped child.

Please and please be warned and let's save our women (the innocent ones) the shame of defending herself for a crime she never committed

ChuksHills:
Thank you!
If you aren't ready for marriage let that girl go stop being a hinderance to her six years is too much.

See why I said you don't have sense.

What makes you think she is desperate for marriage?

I am fully ready but she is heading to her final year. We both agreed to wait till she rounds off before marriage and that's what we have been steadfast on


Every member of my family and her family, down to extended members are aware. The mom is even my gist mate, the dad sometimes we speak on phone, the siblings are good with me.

We are definitely going to be man and wife immediately she drops pen.

Paramount01:
Let me give you a brotherly advice,I was in your show few years ago,i was of your age doing well and i was also asked the same question

I thought tge man of God was putting pressure on me but the fact still remains that as a pastor you are to be committed to the growth of all your members,indeed it looks like pressure on you but she is trying to avoid you from making mistakes. A lot of girls will be even fighting over you because you are financially ready, so the pastor telling h you to get married untim knows what she is saying

Take your fincaee to her and introduced her to her then you will ssd she will quite on it.Make hale while sunshine

I quite understand but my fiancee is a student. I have told her several times that I am in a relationship so why wouldn't she stop? When time is right I will introduce them to each other.

As for girls rushing me, forget it, I don't have that time. They know that and they don't cross boundaries

Gospel2Day:
You're an insincere and dishonest person.
So, why did you keep your relationship from your pastor, if truly it was God Who led you to your fiancée?
You don't trust your pastor enough to introduce your fiancée to him or her, and you think such a pastor can lead you to heaven?

I expected this from you. Being a pastor doesn't give her access to my personal life.

I want to be private just like my fiancee wants. When time is right she will be introduced to it

I have told her that I am in a relationship and she should respect that and stop forcing marriage on me.

tpraiz:
Bro your story is really inspiring (I mean the part where your side hustle can generate atleast 500k monthly)
I am also in similar stage as you, please can you introduce me to your line of business??

Thanks.

First I have two POS stands, one is the first one I opened in my fiancee's mom's shop that she was helping me with before she went to school. Her younger bro has taken over and in his absense my fiancee's mom helps me do the transaction If she is around.

I get a minimum of 5k daily from it.

The second POS location is in Ladipo Market, that is my major source because daily I make 15 to 20k from it. It's really lucrative and I have someone managing it for me and we split base on percentage (she takes 30% and I take 70%) from any profit made weekly.

The second source of income is Bolt. I have a Toyota matrix that is registered on Bolt and the driver remits 30k weekly while we split maintenance 40/60.

Third source is marketing my friend's product (peanut production).
It's a marketing strategy I wouldn't want to reveal just yet because I am growing in it. That fetches me like 10 to 20k daily

Tompson88:
Societal pressure has pushed a lot of vibrant youth into early grave,once you are hardihood enough and know what's good for you,the rest is history my bro,you did well,I once experienced this in my work place, I struggled to sponsored myself in school, the journey of my life has been so slow without a notable helper, now with no reputable job,people that couldn't help my case are now clamoring for marriage although I left the work place without telling anyone but was solely due to the marriage pressure I face but I never made it known to anyone.

I just wish people will stop getting involved in other people's life. It's annoying

ChuksHills:
Why on earth Will you date a girl for solid six years and not marry her and you are happy and call yourself a church leader. My brother your pastor is indirectly telling you to stop fornication his not pressuring you anything.

It is very dangerous to serve God with a sinful Life. There's a reason why God delivered us see the below:

Luke 1:74-75 (KJV)

74: That he would grant unto us, that we being delivered out of the hand of our enemies might serve him without fear,

75: In holiness and righteousness before him, all the days of our life.

You seriously don't have sense

Two friends of mine that I gave money when they were broke, 2017 when ponzi was still hot, I introduced them to MMM and Twinkas, they made alot of money, then those other small small ponzi schemes came out and I put money in two and lost heavily, I told my friend about my ordeal and he sympathized with me. I needed money badly so I put money in another one hoping to be paired so I will pay off my debt but I wasnt and I moved on.

Months later seems like both friends had issues and one of them ( a lady) confessed to me that she and the other guy were the owners of two platforms that I lost heavily. I was shocked, like how? How did they build it and how were they responsible for my loss .

She said the guy intentionally refused to pair me to receive when he saw my name.

I went broke and hungry that year And vowed never to have anything to do with both again.

The guy now is late (may his soul rest in peace) while the girl is a divorcee

Kiira:
You have done well, no one should be pressured directly or indirectly to get married. But, 6 years is too long in to court someone IMO; I get that you guys were very young when you started but it's too long!

She was 19 When we started and I was 24yrs so we needed to go through the process.

I went for a much younger partner because I didn't want any partner to mount marriage pressure on me. After service life was frustrating, I was dead broke and needed time to fix my life and there was no way I could have just jumped into marriage.

The Years and timing gave me the needed space to fix my life and plan through. While she is there growing, I am going through the process and setting the ground running.