₦airaland Forum

VillageBoi: For starters all I can say is a massive "Well done"! You've been very hard at work and I'm sure everyone appreciates what you have done. These new mods na una biko! More grease to your elbows!

The Walking dead needs to join oh - https://www.nairaland.com/1073846/walking-dead-season-3

...and if Sholay can convince to get my behind kicked I'll drop a short script lol

Na God i take beg you...drop a short script like it's hot and let's rip it apart

Hello. Morning to y'all.
@Briareos...you're really doing a gud job as a MOD along wiv Prof and uj....well done.

@villageboi....I see you.

David Hume: Goodmorning Pals! .......how was d night?

Themmy,Hellen,shawylux,Lawiz,Nitos,tom,sholar and Ayoolar .......I hail

Me sef dey hail you oh. Owo meji feeyan kan oh!

lewizylee: Come 23rd-25th


Is either I get evicted



Or am safe

You just spoke my mind, bro. If OAU do me smth strong again, na to vacate this thread sharpaly ni oh. But I reject that situation in Jesus name!

hopeyemmy: *YAWNS*.

Kai...Close ur mouth joor and go brush.

Morning to threadmates.

oaktown101: Its taste so good i've tried it before and its actually more expensive than the regular chickens.

It is even more expensive than 'normal' chickens? .smh.

speedyboi: Is that an ad or short film?

The storytelling looks 'Nollywoodish' (no pun); and on another note, it reminded me of that short 'We've all been there.

It's really nice . Thanks for sharing.


Sholay sorry oo

VillageBoi: Oh no! You can't watch it? It's a really touching 'short' as an advert.

I would still watch it...but not now. Btw, did u get my mail?

Eye abami

Not enough MB...would have loved to watch it.

@Kslib...nice summary for those of us that can't watch for now.

VillageBoi: I know you're just being nice

Ok. Well developed character/s for a short? Not really... shorts are generally too short for that... they base almost everything on the story. I didn't feel there was too much going on rather too little... because there was almost 6, 7 pages of the same sit-and-wait-for-jay repetition. Nor did I find the dialogue to be realistic of a film school setting.

Sorry people... I'm the NOT NICE one

Respekt sir!

Well, your points about the script are true and you sure know much about filmmaking and film schools than I do. I can't wait to be 'unkind' when I see your next project.

^^^^^ Kai! Villageboi...oga na master. I hail oh. Are you even sure we read the same script? I just noticed some of the things you pointed out.

But you harsh small for ur epistle sha. Though, dats wat we scriptwriters need to be on our toes and get better. You be case bro.

Abu Mikey: ^^ Do You think You know me more that Me?

I misinterpreted your post. Saw it as hasty generalisation.

Abu Mikey: Matured Men don't cry!

Silly assertion. If the person is very dear to you, you would cry but it may not be in public.

@OP...nice thread. I would cry (privately) when someone dear to me dies, especially prematurely because the person's chance of rectifying anything has ended, his/her dreams and goals have come to an abrupt end, his/her presence would surely be missed and if that person isn't 'saved' bfor kicking the bucket.

I have read it; nice script. I like the ending and the character of Jay seems well-developed for a short script and very realistic.

But I think the plot would be more suitable for a feature script. I felt there was 'too much going on' for a short film.

Secondly, you had problems with tenses, punctuation and some words. You should know when to add 's' or not for a verb. Then, you repeatedly misspelled words like writing 'His' instead of 'He's' and 'giving' instead of 'given'. Comma was found wanting in some statements. And I still wonder why some words are in uppercase like 'SCREENWRITER'.

Nevertheless, I found the dialogue to be okay: succinct and realistic. I also learnt about filmmaking through the script. The Lord is your muscle. Well done.

WinnieDPooh: Click like if you are for #Team Ogun/Enugu

Hell to the no! #Team....Lagos/Oyo/anywia nysc gives me*

prof800: Migrated to where sir?
**grabs him with hot imploring eyes**

Lol. *Follows him back to TV/Movies section*

[quote author=alkaline.ak]I tried it but it messed up the arrangement of the script and made it look really amateur ish[/quote]I understand but don't you think as much as it is gud it looks "professional", there are more important things that need to pointed out by ppl? For example, is your script "telling" or "showing"? How is the dialogue? Is the plot unique and interesting? Can the reader identify with the characters easily? Is the script realistic in relation to the setting? Etc.

My phone can't open the file now...so I would have to do that when I'm with my system. Not everyone that views this thread would go that far.

So far you make use of scriptwriting terms, it would appear professional even when pasted here. You can also patiently rearrange it before you paste it here. #My opinion#

WinnieDPooh: Lol i'm not a mod and i'm not interested either. But seriously are you a mod?

I am not and not interested for now. Maybe when I finish nysc...I wud get d tym.

Why don't you to paste your script here directly? I think it helps you to easily get a significant number to read your work instead of going thru the stress of downloading. #My opinion#

*Starts to download script on my phone*

WinnieDPooh: Are you sure? I saw a member complaining in the Post your complaints thread in the Romance section she said "Please what section is Semid4life and Sholay2011 moderating? I have been banned and i need to report to a mod thanks". Check the 2nd to last and last page of that thread and see for yourself lol.

Lol...kk. Hope you know say you be the "moderator of this thread" sha?

WinnieDPooh: Lol i'm fine and you...i didnt know you were a Moderator on NL what section are you moderating?

Lol...I'm not a moderator. From where did you get that inference?

Royal Roy: Oya welcome. Introduce yourself.

Plenty fine fine take away full here o!

Let's meet you first.

You look like Lion jare....prove to me that you be Cat.

Oya!!

Let me introduce myself properly.
My name is Mr sholay2011 aka Aseniserare Daodu

I live in Banana "iceland" (Yuzedo is my neighbour).

I am in my late 90s...though. ..I look forever young.

I am singly married.

I migrated from the TV/Movies section to this thread to know more about my favourite posters in the family section.
What else? Well, there it is.

*Gets a seat in the room, waiting for Madam CC *

.

Royal Roy: Lolllz...how I go use my charming damsel do food for lion?.

Did...did you just call me a lion?

WinnieDPooh: Just Passing by

Passing by bii ti bawo? Where have you been since? Hope you're gud sha?

prof800: Why na..
"the family he also important"

Lol. But it isn't that you come here too. I'm sure I brought you here.

Royal Roy: Funny how fast he came in and ran out.

Lolllz....Sholay, show here abeg.

I get one fine chikito for you.

Just come first!

Oh...I'm back ....*clears throat*....fine chikito abi?

*Peeps into room and closes the door quickly*

hopeyemmy: I gentle bro. Dem dey share money for Lag? Rock City, bro.

Lol@sharing money at lag. By using rock city, u mean abeokuta?

hopeyemmy: Sholay bro, how far? How is Ondo treating you?

Yeah...Akure is a bit dry but I dey manage am. Hw ur side? You're in lag, right?

Good morning, threadmates. Good news would be our portion IJN.