₦airaland Forum

I no see maths there, or is maths now optional?

*Nova Gardens - Ilara Epe*

Nova Garden is a lifestyle community located at Ilara, Epe, Lagos State. Carefully planned and
ready to build; the developments at Nova Gardens will be powered by renewable energy (Solar
Power).

*Location*
Nova Gardens is located at Ilara-Epe. It is along the Igbonla road in Epe near St. Augustine
University.

*Title: Registered Survey*

*Highlights*
● Affordable
● Prime Location
● Buy & Build
● Quality Infrastructure

*Features of Nova Gardens*
● Gate House
● Quality Road Infrastructure
● Adaptive Street Lighting
● Central Water System
● Recreational Facilities
● 24/7 Security

*Neighborhood*
● St. Augustine University
● Epe Resort & Spa
● Atlantic Hall School
● Epe Alaro city
● Lekki International airport

*Price*
300SQM - 450k (Outright)
600SQM - 900K (Outright)

Payment plan available
>>Initial Deposit N300K<<
Call or WhatsApp me @ 09074127485 for more enquiries or site inspection

1.. Some tribes in Nigeria will be
crying during funerals but they
will still use that same eye to
locate the people sharing food
nd drinks »»». ..... I will not call
the tribe before they say that I
hate igbo people......
No be type am ohhhh

2.. Impregnating a girl in Europe
is so nice that her parents will
even buy you a car..... But not in
my country » the curse only will
change your destiny....

3.. Trouble is when you hit a
Toyota hilux that contain Hausa
solidiers..... My bro just faint
instantly.

4.. Just because I don't like
cooking doesn't mean I can't
cook .... Have you tasted my hot
water before ? .... chaii ..... You lick
your hand.

5.. nobody can give me headache
when panaldo is #50.. nobody
can break my heart when super
glue is #30... With #80 ayam
safe.....

6.. My drunk friend came to my
house yesterday morning and
started greeting all my mops
outside thinking they are white
men with dreed locks..... Fadaa
Lord help me...

7.. sincerely been ugly is not
easy.... U will snap 70 pictures
delete 60 edit 10 post 2. Lord
have mercy...

8.. some people will do blood
money and still be stingy .. Blood
that is not Even ur own.... What
rubbish...

9.. Going to ur boi frend auz
without informing him... that
heartbreak you are lukin for...
You shall see it

10.. Breaking News : "all short
people are now allow to use
their full picture as passport.....

11.. If you see me talking too
myself understand becouz am
self~employed and am having a
staff meeting....

12.. The downfall of a man is not
the end of his life but if he falls
from a 3~story building.... that
one na CALL OF EXIST....

13.. How can I bought shoes for
250k and expect me to walk on
the ground?.....
Abeg if u hear any sound on your
roof don't panic ... Na me dey
waka ......

14.. I can't believe I was born
naked .... Ahhh those nurses saw
my G-WAGON.... Ohhhh wat
rubbish....

15
If no be for fufu and akara wey I use spoil my voice , who be simi or wizkid.....

16.. What if your offering money
is wat they are going too use to
feed u in heaven?? ..... Some
people will die of ulcer....

17.. U can tell me ur secrets... it's
save with me even the person
reading this post told me that he
slept with 5 members here....
.... Have I told anyone....

18.. My pastor intentionally
sprinkled the Holy Water on us
last Sunday .. Cum see how
makeup were messedup...

19.. On judgement day ... I will
just hold Nigeria flag so that God
can know that have pass
through hell b4 .... I can't face hell
twice ohh.......

20.. Short girls will put one hand
on there waist and be lukin like
teacup..

21.. Imagine you act dead during
a Boko Haram attack and you
hear "shoot everyone again"...
That moment... your urine alone
can flood Nigeria... Or am I
lieing...

22.. Soon MTN will be like ¤ The
number you trying to call had
been owing us since 5 month's ...
When ever you see him help us
beg him to pay back our money..
Thank you......

23.. It is only in Nollywood
movies witches will appear and
the first thing they do is to laugh
.... Ask them what's funny couz I
don understand...

24.. Drinking a lot of water can
help you mind ur bizness.. Couz u
will spend most of ur time
urinating, instead of gossiping.....

25.. Wedding attendance
Church=35
Reception=1500
See am sharing my food in
church...

26.. "pls when I die, nobody
should come nd luk at me in the
coffin becouz am so shy I may
laugh.....

27.. Nigeria guys will collect ur
number in the bus, then
30minutes later .
"Baby I dreamt abt u" abeg bros
which time u sleep ??

28.. Na so I saw one 90yrs old
mama dey pray "O Lord I shall
not die prematurely"....
Mama you wan be Methuselah.

29.. Once a girl says am feeling
cold u will see some guys
behaving like microwave...

30.. When am bored I call Airtel
call care to ask why my phone is
not charging......

31.. My Ex thought that she broke
my heart Mtwcch heart way I don
put heart guard...

32.. I went too buy 4 indomie
and I saw my crush at the aboki
shop ... so I bought 40 ..... am still
selling the remaining 36 ......Abeg
help my ministry....

33.. I started fearing the
witchcraft after seeing my uncle
watching television with one eye
..... When I ask him he said he's
saving electricity because he's
using card.... Am still lukin 4 place
to faint...

34.. I was driving BENZ in my
dream last night ..... until my
sister slap me to wake up and
stop pushing bed to the
kitchen.....

35.. I faint dis morning when a
girl told me she is following me
on Xender in fact am still
fainting...

36.. I went to a local restaurant
and ordered for peppersoup ....to
cut the story short I needed a
new tongue...

37.. No animal can run faster
than a girl with makeup when
it's raining .....

38.. Some people set 18 digits
password to their phone, but the
password is just SLIDE TO
UNLOCK .....

39... They say money is the root
of all evil but poverty is the
complete tree... Infact a forest....
They cun dey deceive us ....

40.. Who else notice that
squeezing Maggi this day's is like
breaking the wall of jericho ...

41.. I think Garri and Sugar
should be added to first aid box
that stuff had been saving life
since 1960.....

42.. The only time I am ever
serious with my life is when am
counting the number of zero in
money I want too transfer...

43.. Battery full and want me to
remove my phone no be 9ja we
dey...

44.. I remember the last time I
had a broke up I was lukin for
my phone in the freezer.....

45.. The way I'm broke now. I
thought of selling our dogs I will
do the barking at night...

46.. People that works in bakery
will not suffer in hell because
they're already use to fire...

47.. I went to my friend auz
around 11:57 and I did not greet
his parents and they think am
disrespectful not knowing that
am just waiting for 12 0'clock so
I can tell them good afternoon....

48.. The only advantage we have
in Nigeria is that we can urinate
any where.............

49.. Pastor don't normally anoint
fat people couz they have oil all
over their body.....

50.. A trailer hit me today but I
didn't die couz I drank 5 alive
yesterday I think now I should
have 4 life remaining...... Says by #
NAIRA-MARLEY#

51.. Imagine NEPA came to my
auz to borrowed my larder, cut
my light and still tell me bro
thank u . God bless U.....

52.. You're in a relationship and
you're saying that they are
cheating on you hmmmmmmmm
have you ever seen a seen a ship
carrying a single person
Thank God am in a relationbike ....

53.. Am lukin for someone to
separate the relationship btw
news paper nd suya, am getting
jealous.....


54.. Ushers in church act like the
biological children of God and
the rest were adopted.....

55.. A guy was arrested 2007
and was released two days ago.
now he was asking me why is it
that people are offline in 2go.....
What should I tell him?
56.. I ask a girl do you know
SHARWAMA. She reply must I
knw everybody...

57.. I have never heard Pastors
preaching about the maps
behind the Bible. I think they are
hiding the direction to HEAVENS
from us.....

58.. I will not be impressed with
technology until I can download
FOOD....

59.. I always double check my
spelling before I post anything
because of this unemployed
SOCIAL MEDIA ENGLISH PROF.

6o.. Guys please if you want to
toast a girl, toast her with sense...
Which one is hw is mummy and
daddy....
What concern you......
Enjoy your day ......
I know my people can't read
without appreciating my effort.

Is it true that noun degree is not valued as other degrees?

I was in the keke with my very proud and boastful girlfriend. We were both enjoying the euphoria of the moment, when she brought out her phone and started taking selfie with me anyhow. Unknowingly, we got to a check point along Rukuba barracks in Jos and we never knew. The soldier man flagged down our keke and asked the keke man to come down. He collected my girlfriends phone from her and asked me to come down from the keke. 'una no know say una dey check point abi?' the soldier man asked. 'ahh sorry sir oo. We were snapping selfie, we didn't even know we have reach Rukuba barracks ni oo' I answered. My angry girlfriend looked at me and then started shouting and barking at the soldier man. 'why will you collect my phone? Who are you? Do u know who my boyfriend is? Do u know who my boyfriend is ehhh? Answer me.' The keke man looked at me wondering who i was. I myself was wondering who i was. Before i could spell Apple my girlfriend landed slap on the soldier man face wataaayyaaaa! On seeing this, the keke man who carried us left his keke and took to his heels. I became speechless. I didn't know who to follow anymore. Was it to run with the keke man, or stand with my girlfriend. Before soldier man could say peem, she landed another hot one wataaayaaaaa! The slap forced the innocent soldier man to drop the phone on the floor. Troops of Soldiers began to run out of the barracks with guns. My girlfriend kept barking and boasting all because I told her am the son of a General. Sha, am grateful i didn't lie. My father is actually the General oversear of Satan must die biblical church umokoro Bayelsa state. I don't have strenght to fight biko. I joined the keke man in the run. I was running and the keke man was running. Keke man saw me chasing him behind and increased his speed. 'bros! I think say soldier say make you catch me o. 'nooo i join you after my girlfriend slap the soldier man again.'

This morning as i wan comot 4 house, i wear my tight Jean and I no too like to dey wear boxer under tight jean, cuz e no dey give me joy. So as usual, i no wear boxer or pant, just my tight jean.
Rain fall well well for Ikoyi this morning and una know as Island be, water everywhere...everybody dey find where to hide make rain no touch dem...i see one bank Atm shade for the other side of the road, na dia people stay and space still dey.
But water dey infront of the place so you go need walk down the end of the water to cross the water...me sef bin wan walk to the end of the water oh...naso i see say na fine fine girls dey inside the ATM place...e go make sense if fine boy like me jump the water instead now. Actually, the water no too wide, na something wey person fit jump but nobody just wan take the risk...me i go take am, if i jump am, this fine girls go trip..
Naso i move backwards small....the babes dey look me, me sef cut eye for them come lick lips...i move back well well...come run..as i reach the water, naso i spread leg finish take jump...na ontop the water i dey when i hear Kpraaaaaaa!..my brothers and sisters, i hear kpraaaaaaaa!!!!
...i think say na clap people dey clap for me say i jump wella, my head swell...i spread legs wider..i come notice say fresh air dey enter my body from under, both front and back....i look down see Lagidigbo Akanni Outside dey sing Rain Rain go away...What is your problem u this preeq, did i buy you nursery rhymes book.
E tear reach back, my yansh black well well for under light..i no even know which one to cover, front or back and My people, i use hand hold my problem front and back...come fall yakata inside water siddon dia oh... � � �
...these babes dey look me dey laugh..why do bad things happen to the good ones? ....I need a towel
...Mooomooo Miii
How i wan even take off am give tailor sew?
. Heaven i need a hug

That bridge get wahala.









Join my real estate marketing team and earn about 15 percent commission on every sales you make.
If interested WhatsApp or call me @ 09074127485.

Lack of planning.



Join my real estate marketing team and earn about 15 percent commission on every sales you make.
If interested WhatsApp or call me @ 09074127485 for more information

Who ask am?




Any where my people, for your cheap lands and houses across Lagos state call or WhatsApp me @ 09074127485

Can u imagine.





Do you want to buy land or house at a suitable location and at cheap prise call or WhatsApp me @09074127485.

Our second Ronaldo.







Okay my people, join my real estate team to earn about 15 percent commission on every sales you make.
Call or WhatsApp me @ 09074127485 if interested.

This meme off me

Double wahala for dead body.
Abeg make someone help me sing am finish

[quote author=Yankiss post=83151420]Fela Kuti, a great musical icon that used his music to challenge irresponsible leadership. Today, music in Nigeria is all about pleasure and kowtow. The radical Fela spirit has been abandoned. The like of Fela Kuti, Gani Fawehinmi, etc rescued Nigeria from shackles of military predation. Today, no one is ready to sacrifice their comfort for the general good.

Lagos is now a big disgrace to other states.
They was a state called LAGOS.

judgementyard:
Me: snake you get luck say no be for naija Dem take catch you!
Snake: why you talk so?
Me: ask lala

You need a microphone

philip0906:
Has nothing to do with Rohr...Just the typical irrational and emotional Nigerian.

In here, head to the politics board, you will see them brazenly displaying flaccid emotions & irrationality.

In your neighbourhood, you'll see same...e.g One rich man drives past with a G-Wagon & for absolutely no reason, they display their hate & stupidity.

On social media, DJ Cuppy & Davido are hated by many senseless Nigerian youths...For absolutely no reason...Just the typical senselessness in display

Rohr hasn't done badly given the resources he has and the support...but some senile commentators who soak garri in their mother's house, will spill bile & you'll think they knew anything about coaching.

Does that mean we shouldn't criticise? No! But once criticisms are not constructive & rational, which is largely the case with many Nigerians, that's where the problem is

You're right

Good

Noel1:
Yes, that is why you should do good to people and stop being wicked

I'm already doing that

The woman don hammer bi that

PureGoldh:
Nice concept.... This lady makes real Good music...... She is an awesome artiste.

Someone should tell her that if she needs Pure Original Honey... She should Kindly call or whatsapp me on 081 0166 6771

My guy I like the way you advertise.
You too if you need land or building at various locations in Lagos, call or WhatsApp 09074127485

Masturbation is very immoral and should be avoided by any one that wants to live upto Bible’s standard.

I was once a masturbator, I know how it feels.
I was helped by one of Jehovah’s Witnesses.
I suggest you get in contact with them, I know they will be of great help.

I have only a word for you, and they say a world to the wise is enough.
JAPA

Maj196:
If I were to go back to school i will surely opt for computer science. Don't ask my why

You said I shouldn't ask you why, but pls I really want to know why you would choose computer science over computer engineering.

KingDann:
My guy whichever choice you make eventually be sure to develop a digital skill that's a huge added advantage.

Digital skills like what?

kindy51:
I will advice computer engineering. Thank me later
P.s I am a computer science student

Pls why would you advice me to go for computer engineering?

greatnaija01:
searching for answers, you should go to GOOGLE, not nairaland.... the response time of google is faster and you will get unemotional answers that are straight to the point.


See, if you are trying to study any of these two in a NIGERIAN STATE/FEDERAL UNIVERSITY pls travel there first and meet students from those department/faculties and they will SHOW YOU THE BITTER TRUTH.

I wish you well.

Thanks, I really appreciate