₦airaland Forum

lucabrasi:
i read it through and i wasnt taking it personal,after all im not the defender of yorubaland i was just correcting an impression when i read this paragraph that the mucus like thingy dripping is not on fish head but the whole fish and not as if people munch on fish head dripping with the "mucus thingy"
but i guess we all have our diffrent views,but because i personally dislike snails and would never touch it or eat i wont say to people that its disgusting

Lawd-a-mercy!

Okay, let's try this again and hopefully the last time.

Do I think fish head is bony - Yes

Do I think it's got mucus like thingy dripping all over it - Yes

Do I think Fish Head is disgusting, unappealing and crap - Yes, Yes, oh God Yes!

The operative word in all of the above is I. . . ME . . . NI. . . Emi. . . Okay, what the Ibgo word for Me? Any of my Igbo friends want to help me out here? Thanks and much love in advance.

I love Beans, I can eat beans morning, afternoon, night and snack on it in between meals. I've had people tell me to my face that Beans is Nasty, they would rather starve than eat beans, how anyone in their right mind can eat beans is unimaginable to. What do I do? I keep right on eating my beans. . . why? Because I understand everyone has their own taste, their own feeling about things not only do I understand that. . . I respect it even if it doesn't match mine.

We all come from different walks of life and to expect that because we're Nigerians we have the same experiences is. . . is a little short-sighted. The way you've seen fish prepared is not and will not be the same way I do. If I say fish head has mucus dripping over it, it's because that's what I've seen. It's good that you've seen differently, now you can put it out there so people know there is obviously another side to the Fish Head Mucus story. What you do not do, however is call me to task for my own experience with and perception of Fish head because it doesn't gel with yours.

Finally. . . it's Fish Head for goodness sakes, why are we arguing over it?

Come now! Of course our reporters can do this too, they are just preoccupied with more important matters.

Anytime now, important news will break on Birthdaygate. They have to be on hand for that. . . some of them have been trying to crack the case of the President's missing Birthday for months. I say let them have their well deserved moment.

4 Play:
He didn't so much rubbish it as reverse it. To think this glib idiot is called "Smart".

Yeah, I think that was tongue in cheek on his parent's part, unfortunately no one got the joke. . . until now.

He Reversed it? But isn't he saying that generator use, the direct effect of lack of power supply is now the cause of lack of power supply?

Okay, now I've confused myself. LOL

deor03:
@ Mustay , faoni572

Just put yourself in the shoes of the speech writer, how will it go!!!!

" Fellow Nigerians,
I, President Umaru Yaradua, of the Federal republic of Nigeria>>>, !!!!!!!.
I want to state categorically that by birthday is on x.x/ August/ 19XX

Long live Mr President
Long live the Federal republic of Nigeria "

Meanwhile,
1. Niger delta is like dubai
2. Nepa is performing
3. Roads are perfect
4. Teachers are smiling to the bank with huge salaries
5. American president daughter has just been admitted in Gbagada General Hospital

Abi?

Rotflmao!!!

And reporters from far and near listen attentively, pen poised waiting for the right words for their next headline, each hoping his will be more attention grabbing than the others!

In the right hands, the words PRESIDENT'S BIRTHDAY CONFIRMED can be so profound and life changing.

So let me get this straight, putting a ban on generators will help create a better power supply? Gawd! I always knew Nigeria was full of great minds and this just proves it. . . Mr. Senator here has single handedly rubbished the Laws of cause and effect. Now the direct effect of a cause can be the direct cause of the cause. Brilliant! If you ask me, just Brilliant!!

LMFAO! This is too much. The plan is so ill conceived it’s amazing no one thought to call it off before making it public. Well now, it’s obvious what they think the of Nigerian Public. . . Yep, we’re gullible and will swallow anything they shove down our throats.

While they are at it, they should also look into banning the brand of water they drink in the Senate House because whatever it is, it’s obviously destroying their brains.

He won't tell us when his birthday is? Egad!

Does he not understand the repercussions of his thoughtless act? How else will people steal money under the guise of throwing a surprise party for El Presidente? The inhumanity!

No! No! No! This should not be tolerated. The Man must resign ASAP!!

Do we have a commitee for this? Where can I sign up?

LMAO!

So because someone misses church for one day, they need deliverance? Heavens!

No wonder so many people are being led astray.

saintkola:
Its obviously Denzel Washington, Most of Will Smith's movies are over hyped, mediocre & don't always live up to expectations!

May the Almighty God Bless you more and More. I'll go one further and say his movies NEVER live up to the hype.

Sure Will Smith is a Movie Star and can wipe the floor with whomever but Mr. Denzel Washington is an actor. . . an artiste if you please. I'd take the glory of the latter over the former any day, thank you very much!


Oh one more thing. . . you know what's forced? Will Smith's Comedic talents (and I use the word talent in the loosest term possible). Put him in the league of Martin Lawrence and Chris Turker. . . then we'll have a valid comparison.

lucabrasi:
can't make head nor tail of all this,we are not monkeys or cave people,we don't eat fish with mucus and what not please get your facts right,they are normally cleaned thoroughly and irrespective of what part of fish it is,any slimy stuffs on it will run a high risk of food poisoning

Jeebus!

Did you read it through? I mean really read it through? I doubt you did because if you had, you'd see where I said it was all BS. Now maybe it's my use of BS that threw you off, so I'll spell it out. . . it's all BULL SHIT meaning I made it up, meaning it's not true, meaning it is false, meaning you shouldn't take it seriously, meaning it's a JOKE.

Fish Head being disgusting is MY personal opinion. it's is Bony and drips mucus. I don't eat it, I find it unappealing to look at let alone eat and would rather cut out my tongue than have a taste of the nasty, unappetizing crap called Fish Head. Again that is just me.

Thanks

Lol. . . Mythical fiction, eh? Okay oh, I've said my own.

Honestly, I didn't even know certain parts of fish are attributed to a particular tribe. It's fish for goodness sakes! I swear Naija people, we like to a mountains out of molehill. Just eat the darn thing and enjoy it. . . coz in less than 4hrs you'll be passing it out of your body.

First of first, Hancock should never, ever, ever be used to judge anyone's acting skills. All the freaking actors looked like they phoned their performance in.

Second of first, It's Mr. Denzel Washington, thank you very much.

Third of first, Will Smith to Denzel Washington? Willy boy to Mr. Denzel Washington? Fresh Prince to Mr. Denzel Washington? What an insult on Mr. Denzel Washington!!

When Mr. Denzel Washington was dazzling us in movies like Cry Freedom and Glory, Willy Nilly was still in his multi-colored knickerbocker whining about how parents just don't understand.


When Mr. Denzel Washington was captivating us in movies like Malcolm X, Willy Willy was moving to a town called Bel-air


Then there was Training Day, Antwone Fisher, John Q, Remember the Titans, Mr. Pinkett was busy fighting Aliens and Aliens and more Aliens.


Secondly. . . There is no secondly! Comparing The Fresh Prince with Mr. Denzel Washington is sacrilege!

For me to even put their names in the same sentence, I feel I must pay penance.

*Gets down on Knees*

Oh Forgive me Mr. Washington. I was led astray by OP.
Oh Forgive OP Mr. Washington, for he knows not he is doing.
Hum! Hum! Hum!



*Gets up*
OP be more careful next time. Seriously.

Pataki:
So it was all about inferiority complex?

According to you guys now.

Abi, isn't that why you think we would like nothing better than to crawl up a white woman's vagina so we can be reborn white.

Pataki:
True AFRICAN beauty.

Even Britney Spears once tried it.

Is there a black Britney Spears, now?

Surely a white woman won't be trying out something considered true African beauty!

I mean they are the superior race. . . a race the rest of us are trying to become

KarmaMod:
There you go. I personally don't have anything against interracial relationships. The real ones are lovely. Hiedi's Italian dude pretty much ignored her and their daughter. Who's the one now acting like the father to the child? No be Seal? Abeg. More grease to their elbows

I just think it's pathetic when people feel the need to bash their races to prove a point. Women who bash guys in interracial relationships make me sick and so do guys who bash women of their own races because of it. So immature and pitiful

The same people screaming that black women try to be white. Apparently some of you don't know how much these women use on tanning machines, tanning lotions, spray on tans, etc. Btw white females DO use hair extensions especially the rich ones. they clip or something fuse it to the back of their hair. Collagen for the lips n ko? Butt implants?

Who gives a flying damn if a person decides to put extensions. So? So what? All these lame excuses used to justify insulting black women. Sinead O'connor shaved her head too. If we did the same, what's going to stop these people from saying we're copying her as well

It's funny how the same people who bash black women for supposedly "trying to be white" are the ones that run after this 'wannabe white women" the most. How many of them do you see drooling over Alex Wek and what not. Abeg. Make we hear word

Jab! Jab!

Hook!! Cross! Hook!

Uppercut!

Knockout!!!

Presenting your light weight championship winner – Misssss KarmaMod!!

And she didn't need no stinky bleaching cream or tacky weave to get it done either!

By the way. . . Scraped head? What the heck is that?

Pataki:
Please who or what is patroni?

God Bless you sir!

I thot it was just me.

Queenisha:
ROFL.
There's one I know in Philly.Married this Congolese woman at 17 that served him like a King suffered through his medical training and as soon as he graduated,he left her for a white woman.
A decade later he's living in a one bedroom apartment lost his house and cars to his trophy queen and paying heavy child support for her 3 kids and he then called my friend and apologized for treating her like crap but too late she's hapilly remarried to a fine young man

Aww. . . Poor guy! That is just wrong! Eeeya!

Lost his home and cars? So very. . . . Rotflmao! ^{*wipes tears*}

Gawd! I can't even say it with a straight face.

Feigning pity usually comes easy to me, wonder what's wrong.

Hannibal:
Anutha comment reeking of desperation!!!

What about countries like the UK where white people don't dwell in trailer parks??
Puhleaaaaaaaaaaaaaaze, White women are more valuable. . . .when they LOVE. . . .they do it through thick and thin unlike Black sisters.
Majority of y'all are marrying the size of HIS pockets anyways so whats the fuss about?
Black women and DRAMA are synonymous.

Slips quietly into the thread

Sweating buckets and whispering to Hannibal

Ehmmm. . . ‘sceez me, Sir Mr. Hannibal Sir. I know you are a busy man. I. . . I just wanted to. . . err . . . corre. . . no, I mean share something with you. See the thing is nowadays one doesn’t ^*swallows* have to actually live in a trailer to be called a trailer trash, just as people don’t have actually have a red neck to be called one. I. . . I think trailer trash ^*gulp* refers to people who. . . who are loud, dirty, lazy, have too many kids, guzzle down beer by the pack, foul mouthed, slutty, ignorant, unhealthy, all around trashy looking and white.

I just thot you should know. Okay bye

*Zooms out of the thread before he turns his ire on me*
Back to watching the scene behind a big gorodom

doe82:

@ Syren and Phileolove

HOW DO YOU KNOW A REAL MAN?

When he walks up to you and say "Hi, I'm a real man"

Duh!

yrunvus:
i'll be in lagos in October to meet up with an oil firm, they called me for a Manager in Training position due to start in December. I have no idea what manager-in-training means but i'll sure find out on my week long visit in lagos.
While i was visiting naija in March my uncle advised me to move back and he asked for my CV, he forwarded it to his companie's HR dept, a week later they called me and informed me about the position. There's no interview involved because it's kind of a hook up thing, i'm simply meeting with them

Here's the deal: i'm a mechanical engineer in the US, been working for 2 years now and the pay is good. I don't mind moving back but what should i expect from a naija company, i don't want to ask for too much and i don't want to sell myself short. what should i expect as per salary and in benefits?

Oh you'll be fine, you've got the brains and the experience.

Good Luck mah lovah!

So when will you come back for me?

I am shocked you didn’t know this. Well today is your lucky day my friend because I’m about to blow your mind away.

First of all have you ever heard of Yemoja? No? Well she is a Yoruba Goddess of fertility. . . you know what that means right? No? That’s okay, I’ll tell you, fertility means to be fruitful, be productive and this is what Yemoja stands for - She gifts women with the ability to bear children. The name Yemoja means the mother whose children are like fishes. . . not in the literal sense of course but in number. Do you know the average number of babies a fish can have at a time? Okay, I don’t know the answer to that but I know it’s a lot.

Anyway, This is Yemoja. . . not only is she the goddess of fertility, she is also a shape shifter. I don’t have to explain what that means right? I mean it is pretty self-explanatory, a’ight just in case. . . a shape shifter is someone who shifts shapes. Back to Yemoja, when word got out on how powerful she was, people. . . mostly men from all over the place came looking for her, some wanted to marry her so they can be assured of reproducing and thus spreading their seeds, you know how men are with their egos- The more children I have, the more man I am hoo, hoo. hoo ^{Chauvinistic pigs}. Others wanted to kill her. . . again because of their egos- How dare a woman hold the power of keeping the human race alive! Whaa! Whaa! Whaa! ^{Bunch of cry babies.} So with men coming from far and near, ready to marry her. . . or kill her, Yemoja had no choice but to shift shape. She became. . . you guessed it – A Fish!!

Now, Yoruba men everywhere eat fish…I’m sorry, eat fish head because they believe this is where Yemoja’s powers are. If you think about, it makes sense to have her powers in her head not her tail. So there you have it, the reason why Yoruba men eat fish head, it has become an aphrodisiac of sorts, you know some people use strawberries, some use Chocolate. . . Yoruba men use fish head. Think back to all those buka days, do you remember your Yoruba friends became a little. . . errr. . . randy after eating, they carried on like there was hot coal in their pants, right? See, now you know why. Oh I bet you are feeling a little envious but you needn’t be for two reasons 1) Yoruba men aren’t the only ones who can tap into this Viagra from the sea, any man from any tribe can too. 2) This whole Yemoja story is complete BS. The truth is I have no idea why Yoruba men eat fish head. I don't know why anyone for that matter wants to eat fish head. I find it absolutely disgusting. . . with the bones and the mucus like thingy dripping out from the fins. Ewww!

Okay. . . Alrighty then.

Asta, I guess.

If I overhear him discussing me with his friends, I'll just make sure he overhears me discussing him with my friends.

He says I'm not that good, I say he is the worst I ever had, that sometimes I have to use all my will power to keep from yawning while we're doing it sef.

So you see. . . no biggie.

Bring it on, baby!!

The only way to resolve this is to have an auction of Nigerian Girls. The last girl standing will be the one who will love you straight from the heart. . . she has no choice, ain't nobody else want her. She'll be so happy & grateful to have someone. . . anyone. . . you, she'll pledge her undying love.

Finito!

michelin89:
I am a student and haven't got a summer job. I have limited resources. I don't want to go bankrupt before owning an account.

I have thought about the romantic dinner and other things. but the gift is giving me 10% sleepless nights!

Lol.

You know it sounds cliche but sometimes, it really is the thought that counts. Just make him feel extra-special, let him know how happy you are to share his day and then cap it with a little

What game and team does he root for? If you can, get him tickets to the game, go with him even if you don't like sports. After the game take him to dinner and end the day with a little

If you know any electronic stuff he's been eyeing lately and you can afford it, buy it for him. Take him to dinner or you can prepare his favorite dish, set the mood and end the day with a little

Please don't buy Socks, watch, underwear, shirt, tie, shoes. . . all too practical! Ughh!

I love the lockets where you can put pictures. If you can, look for pix of you two as babies. I think it's sweet.

But do guys wear lockets?

Gamine:
How will i know if Rain is falling straight from the sky?

Oh! Oh! I know this one. . . the same way you will know if a Nigerian girl loves you straight from the heart.

@ Topic
Oh absolutely! It's hard to see you know, maybe because it's not there but it also could be because people don't want to see it, especially those who have curried their lives out. My policy. . . never curry until you are sure it would be curried back. I know, I know, some people think it's playing safe but you can't mess with things like this, it's like life or death, you know. I'm ashamed to say this but I have to be honest, the only time background comes into play for me is when it's real important, say it's something others will see, then I gotta go for the best background, you know what I mean but if it's for my eyes only, whatever works. Fortunately, I have a system in place where I can curry the appropriate backgrounds for the appropriate time and appropriate event, you can't leave it to chance, that's what I say. A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, yeah in the old days only guys were allowed to, you know but now puh-lease, women have also moved on up, if you get my drift (ooh, you do, do ya! You so nas-tay! So very very dirrrrty! Naugh-tay too! Me likey )

Anyhoo, back to topic, so yeah, absolutely. . . I totally without a shadow of a doubt have no idea what you are talking about.

Rotflmao!

Absolutely Brilliant!

Thanks for sharing guys.

Yowzah! My head just exploded!!!

Thanks guys, I didn't need it anyway. 

On a serious note, I've read and reread and rereread and I sill have no clue what the debate is about. Now the sensible thing would be for me to shrug and say asta but sometimes I'm not what you'd call . . .sensible.  Apart from that, I genuinely want to understand, one sentence is all I need and I'll work the rest out.

Church starts in 30 mins and I am on my bed, obviously have no intention of going. Is there something wrong with me? NO.

I think it would be hypocritical of me to go to church just to show my face, so people can say " She was in church today"  The measure of my relationship with MY GOD is not based on the number of times I go to church.

Do not forsake the fellowship of believers, iron sharpeneth iron. . . that's all good and dandy but what happens when after service, you feel as empty as you came in? Yep, this is where some people will turn the other way because they think it's impossible. Oh but it is be possible. . . it be sooo possible.

Allow me to paint you a picture. . .

After the grace, you pick your bag, ready to leave with the anointing but just as you get up from your chair, you are waylaid by the calling card woman who wants to sell her card, while telling you how she hasn't sold any since wedinaiseday. You aww and ohh, while thinking to yourself "oh come on, how will me buy $5 card, going to help you".

Then the woman who is celebrating her 50th birthday for the 5th time, shoves her aso egbe under your nose. . . you have to think fast on your toes, which sometimes means lying or you'd be stuck paying $450 for a material you won't put on your worst enemy.

A few feet away, the elders are settling fight for two former best friends and you can't help but watch jaw dropped as the women cuss, hiss, rolling their eyes, tap their feet. . . their bodies wired for combat while completely ignoring what the poor peace-maker Baba who stammers when in a tense situation is saying.

Okay, you tell yourself. . . eyes forward, slow & steady movement, don't call attention to yourself and just as you get to the door. . .  a man who on a good day can pass for your grandfather catches your eyes and passes a suggestive message to you, while juggling his 2 month old baby and ignoring the 4yrs old with mucus and tears running down his face, tugging at his shirt. Your first thought is "Is this one out of his freaking mind?" but then you quickly think "Shoot! I'm in church oh" so you send a half-hearted prayer for forgiveness. . . half hearted because you think he deserves.

Finally you get in your car and you drive away from CHURCH like the devil is on your tail.

The day I found myself saying "Thank God, I'm finally out of there" . . . prayed  frevently too, so it wasn't one of those off the cuff thanks, was the day I knew something was terribly wrong somewhere.

Church isn't a place you should be running from, it's supposed to be a refuge, a sanctuary. . . a place YOU ESCAPE TO and when you leave, you feel spiritually energized.  At least staying at home, listening to a live streamed sermon and worshipping along, I'll be assured of taking something with me.

So Gamine the way I see, something is right because I don't feel like going to church.