₦airaland Forum

you welcome

tell him to propose 2u, simple
i'm saying this because i know we men. 2morow he'll say u threw urself @ him
so let him propose first

Yes girl, tell him to propose to you and give you an engagement ring, its very important.

THere's this tendency to be alone with no distraction and think of ways to get out of the job quandry, thats just it.

Its your home whether or not your wife pays the bills for now, you need to be in charge, dont let them intimidate you into a corner. If you need privacy they gotta give you. dem no get work? All this idle inlaws sef. You can also look for a cathederal or church around you when you neeed solitude. Most cathedrals and churches are usually very quiet in the afternoons, believe me you will so much enjoy the environment. Just keep praying and dont let them come btw you and your wife, some inlaws are pain in the neck. The best

What difference does it make? Come tthink of it, where are you from? I need to know coz i have been thru the same thing, I am yoruba and i have always wanted to date a yoruba person but it has never happened. I have dated guys from other tribes and its ok altho my parents have always cried foul but what will i do now? Believe me i wont reject love in the name of tribe. Mind you i will be getting married this year but not to a yoruba person and i love him so so much. so what are you gonna do, sit there while love passes you by all in the name of tribe? You gotta be kidding me

Haba girl, jamb is not the only means of getting admission now. cant he apply for part time studies? Try and convince him to go for part time studies since he is now into biz. As for marriage if you love him and believe he can take good care of his family, then go ahead. Best of luck

She does not need an abortion at this stage of her life. She is a mature adult and i believe she can fend for them, She should just have the children and take care of them. Abortion=murder (and twins at that) 

Man go for a DNA test, you need to confirm if the boy is realy yours. The cost wont matter by the time you know the truth which ever way. A woman has no biz bringing babies from other men into her matrimonall home. Lets call a spade a spade bastard children end up breaking the home.

Gracial all,
All comments appreciated. But the thing is the job situation is really disturbing necessitating the need to be alone many times.
Moreso, some of her family know about this situation, as some pass "tongue in cheek comments " atimes.
But they are in-laws, what can one do?!?!

Wetin concern your inlaws, let them run their commentary as much as they want to as long as your wife does not rub it in your face. people will always talk, man you are blessed and people are only jealous because you are not totally down due to the loss of your job. Don't let them break your marriage, be strong and happy.

But why doo you want to be alone?

Girl i guess you are malancholic by nature (if i am wrong please correct me). Melancholics are by nature too serious and believe they are more intelligent than every other person around them. Both of you cant take evrything too seriosly else you will bore each other to death. Your combination is good because it will help you balance your home (i mean work and play). You are meant to complement  and not duplicate each other. Try and relax a bit, you will be just fine.

U need help

[b]Oops, that is oh so devastating, so whose is it? If were a boy? She's outta my life for good or for worse urrrrgh

You aint weak buddy, you are just a loyal and deep lover and thats the best way to love! Its just that love is not predictable and it can hurt you silly at times. Don't worry you will get over it, try meeting up with other ladies, get hooked again and dont be afraid to love again. There are so many uncertainties in life but when you fall you don't sit there, get up and get a life again. You will be just fine

Married a man because she felt God wanted her too marry him Oops! Isn"t God himself love? May God forgive us humans. Why would God give her someone she cant love? God is not the author of confusion.

BabeX:
testing

yeah it worked

This Hauwa sef  Na real yau yau person, na me u dey hiss for? 

am proudly wearing my abstinence ring se o ti gbo david . when i settle down i will continue that way. again, sex is not food so she will survive

@ Hauwa

Its not just about sex Hauwa, its about intimacy too so quit playing holier than thou.

I will praise him in his prudency but will stop the biz abruptly . I will let him know its too early for now, he needs to concentrate on his school work.

Wetin be arrangy marriage, shuo? In this day and age? Na dem sabi.

All this mummy and daddy's pet sef, they just never grow up.arrrgh!

Hey, are you the same person who brought her case to inspiration fm yesterday evening 28/01/09? just curious? Anyway its a two way thing, One your parents fight is not entirely selfish, parents are just usually protective of their children. Two their reasons are just not valid, as long as your man is responsible, hardworking and ambituous then you dont have a problem. You have been with him for five years so i cant say you are infatuated, i believe you guys love each other . Not all marriages have parental consent and some have turned out so well. Try and convince them futher,, if they refuse, go ahead, you are sure too suceed together. I stand to be corrected. Wish you the best!

Thank you all for your contributions. I have asked him several times why he prefers sleeping in the living room, he said it was because of my little child of about 2 years and he feels more comfortable there but I told him if he does not like lying on the bed with me and the child he can put another foam on the floor of the bedroom, I had to take the child to the children's room. After sleeping in the bedroom for few days he went back to the living room. I then ignored him.

There is television with DSTV, air conditioner and the room is well ventilated.

The boy is from him. We have four children together. He only comes to the bed room once in 6 - 7 months when he wants to make love to me. In fact the last time he slept in our bedroom was six months ago before I had my last baby who is 6 months. Am not after sleeping in the same room and making love. But the husband and wife relationship. The baby now can sleep on her bed if he chooses to sleep in the bed room with me. Am so bothered because when there are visitors in the house, he would be lie in the living room with them is what bothers me most. The visitors would think we are having misunderstanding.

I think may be he is having extra marital affairs outside that is why he does not like sleeping in the bedroom because the girls may be calling him late at night and he would not want me to listen to their conversation.



Now i see what his supposed reason is. Look dont just ignore him you have to be strong and fight for your home. Confront him but do it subtly and calmly, if he wont bulge join him in the sitting room. Lets see if he will move to the garage, why would a man leave his wife a mother of four alone in the bedroom. I believe there is a problem and he should spill it to you so you can have peace of mind. I am sure you have been married up to 10 years, you should be growing not retrogressing. More importantly be prayerful, cry out to God and if it is a case of another woman, believe me God will fight your battles. There are so many of those husband snacthers out there, some of them even have the guts to come to nairaland and say "Help am falling in love with a married man" instead of saying "help i need deliverance am breaking another woman's home" May God see you through and keep your family together.

Are you guys are on good terms? How clean tidy and peaceful is your bedroom ( i mean i hope you are not a nag)? Is it well ventilated?How do you have sex then? I beleive there is more to your story than you are spilling, a man will not just get up one day and say am tired of my own bed, Give us the details then we can help.

Maybe she is meant to be your future wife, looks like a revelation if you beleive in that

They are always falling inlove with another woman's man. Too dry and weak too get their own!

daleru daleru ore oko, fi oko oloko le! You are simply a home breaker without self control. Dont worry, the whip he is using to beat his wife is still on the wardrobe. He will whip you even harder. Can you imagine, inlove with a married man, may someone fall inlove with your husband too that is if you eventually get a proper one. Rubbish

It can either be good or bad depends on who your spouse is. I know every little detail about my sweethearts pay from monthly salary to benefits and all., infact i run his account. We both work in financial institutions and for privacy sake he moves his cash into my custody. Infact when his ATM CARD expired for a while he moved all his funds into my account and i still manage the funds. Not just that i carry his atm card around and do most of his withdrawals for him. I have never touched a kobo without his permission and he respects me a lot for this. There is no amount he can not entrust into my care because he knows am not greedy and am content with my pay even tho its not even half of what he earns. He also has unrestricted acess to my funds too. If your spouse can prove him/herself worthy then its ok otherwise don't even think about it

All u need to do is to sit her down and talk to her.
there should be a reason behind all this

I second Eteri on this, she must have a reason for acting that way. I also have a feeling you attend a very strict church, she just may be trying not to get too close so that sex does not come in altho the fact that she sleeps over makes me have a second thought, but pls talk to her first. She will come around. Wis you the best

< i have told my fiancee a million times that the day i find out you screwing with another woman, no matter how long we have been married, that is the end. I wish all the married folks in here a very happy married life.
Cheerio. >

What if you are caught cheating or flirting with another man/woman?

I hate cheating with a passion so i cant be caught dead doing that. As [a man] thinks within himself, so he is. It is what you approve you do.

have u done any study to find out why many married men hang out in the bars and night clubs? mu natural instincts tell me that most human beings will love to be where they are comfortable the most. have u guys given a thought to why the bar seems more comfortable for the married man? is his home hell? is his wife a perpetual headache?
does he have any respect at home?

Not every woman is a trouble maker. Arielle is right, most of the married men we have now are so indiscipline when it comes to fidelity issues. To them clubbbing, drinking and womanizing is a normal thing. it just saddens me and i wonder what the world is turning into. I guess women can't just take it anymore. I ask the guys in here, Is it possible for you as a person to stick with your wife? How faithful have you been in your relationships? Can men tolerate half of what they do to women when it comes to fidelity especially? I dont support divorce but for me i can divorce if he cheats on me. i have told my fiancee a million times that the day i find out you screwing with another woman, no matter how long we have been married, that is the end. I wish all the married folks in here a very happy married life.
Cheerio.