₦airaland Forum

They are 100 ways to kill a rat! ...the same ways they are to dealing with a nagging wife! ... beating your wife is just one

...why make use of one that can cause damages in terms of medical bills n a lifetime of regret after spending a few moments of your life serving 18months in a prison yard filled with convicts who admire the way your ass moves anytime you work down d stairs! ...

OR ...the position of your yansh protruding wit a vast amount of sexual energy each time you bend to cut the grass in the prison yard!

Instead choose the avoid n run option ... It might nt b easy! ... But anytime yu want to avoid an aggressively exciting scene wit yur wife ...try as much as possible to say " I know am wrong ... I promise to change ...just give me more time"

Her attention would be shifted from _"your friends are taking care of their wives like iPhone screen ...yu here complaining dat I don't know ao to spend money ...useless man! ..yuar ar as useless as my left hand! ...omo ale jati jati!" __to ___ "ao long will I have to wait for you to change your behavior of talking to me like am your stepsister

Just kip saying ..i will change give me more time ...meanwhile locate your car keys ...or wear your 3quarter n prepare to leave the house to grab a spoonful of fresh breeze skydiving down your spine dat yu didn't end up on the front page of the NATION NEWSPAPER for speardiving your wife after beating mercilessly for provoking you!

Don't let them get into your head! ... They can be your sweetheart in d time of sorrow but become your greatest nightmare in times of argument!

... They don't hate you! ...it is natural for women who care about you to nag n disturb you ...it shows they ar concerned about you! ... But some overdo it by not knowing when to stop!

***Pardon my typo errors ...am not perfect but I will be!

Omonaijani:
The Gionee Marathon M5 Mobile phone is made in India by Syntech Technology PVT, LTD, it is different from Chinese products currently flooding the market. It runs on Android 5.1 Lollipop with a 4000 Mah battery and uses capacitive Touch screen.

Yo! ...broda Gionee m5 Marathon runs a 6,020mAh! ... Point of correction!

Nice info @Op
...just so you know ..there ar no four things that happen to you when yuar electrocuted ...there is onli one!

When yu get electrocuted _you Die! ...if yu don't die after being electrocuted ...yu were nt electrocuted ..yu were just SPANKED! ... sometimes our body nids some pre-intimacy!

Women go for POWER or SUCCESS ... If yu possess none you hv gat to be the FUNNY GUY!

Most funny guys are often Mayors of The Friend Zone ... But for you to be different ...dress neatly n smart ... Yu might be broke but yur appearance would do you more good in getting ladies to be comfortable around you!

If they are comfortable around you ..all yu nid is to show yurself thru intelligent speech and witty ScarcasmSalted vocabularies ... Dude am Not telling yu 2 change your voice to auto tune! ... Bring forth good vocabularies nd nt changing yur voice to a lowbudgetEmpireMusicCrew!

Nd stop making sex your main priority when meeting a Lady ...get yourself a robot if yu can't be patient in a making a lady comfortable around you without her thinking yuar going 2 rape her d very moment she lands in your room due to d fact yuar always licking n brushing your moustache wit yur tongue anytime yu stare at her boobs when engaged in a a close contact discussion!

I dont kno about odas but for me! ... If the Mp3 is removed n replaced with AKA Abi AAC ...It will look weird!

Am so familiar to mp3 dat any other code name will change the delight of music in ears ....imagine using AAC instead of mp3 it will sound like am listening to a PDF file thru your earpiece!

" ... Now MP3 has been terminated in order for other superior audio formats to reign"

By the way if they claim they ar oda superior formats ...why do dey nid to erase mp3 format to make d oda superior format reign ...unless they ar nt as superior as they claim!

What is dis Gawd! ... Yu just came down from the Mountain n yu pasted every single word with no pre-intimacy of adequate spacing n romantic punctuations!

Dis is so rough! ... Am so vexed!

Am coming for your head! ...when am done downloading

@Ninaperdido ... Nice one ...me likey! _
What do i believe?

...I believe in ME, because am scared that I fear NOTHING!

OKorowanta:
Huge talent but my grouse with u guys is,
most of dis celebrities are very disrespectful even to their fans.
Olamide na one of dem,Cynthia,Davido,timaya,endless list.
Olamide get mind dey tell pipo say fucck you on national tv just because ur songs get patronized.
The celebrity/fans relationship is dead immediately they make the first one million.
To show humility like 2face does not take muscles.

why ar yu so interested in maintaining any relationship with a celebrity! ...they are out der pushing out deir talent n pretending to be humble ...just to have enough fan base

...der ar not doing dat to engage in any relationship with dem ..They want you 2 follow the music with your heart n not follow their with your attention

If you don't know ...unless you grew up with a celebrity right from the bottom dey will always be rude to you coz most of them are with d notion yu all ar famzing dem because dey ar now rich n showing dem fake love as lil kesh likely said!

Bros ...connect with the music n not the artist!

Bros ao far? ... Yu nid good andriod phone with sharp camera @ 20k ... E bi lyk say yu hv being living under the rocks!

If yu even find a decent brand new android phone @ 20k ...it will surely be a phone with 8mp camera n 250mAh battery .. D one yu will press for 2mins n slap d ba3 outside n wipe it wit spit n use it for anoda 2mins ...n slap it out again! ... N kip slapping it until yu realise yu can onli get a slappTouch phone n not a touchScreen phone! @ dat amount!

If I were yu I would add 3k n goan find a correct second hand or London use phone! ...

Baasebaa0570:
sorry to say this you are daft YBNL is not enslaving any artiste Olamide objective is to create a platform for every artiste they signed so he/she can stand on his/her own in the future. That the way he build himself also
Can you leave what you work hard for something else that dont worth it USE UR BRAIN

Bros calm down nau! ...this is a perfect dosage of pure scarcasm ...why yu cum dey vex? Ar you on your period?

He is a man ;he is a celeb ; he has the money! ... Dats all it takes to have ladies bust their legs open like scissors

Dnt blame him oo! ... It is hard to use condoms on ladies who just want to tie him down one or two belles at least if they go broke ... Wizkid will run the expenses in the name of I carried your baby for 9months!

Getting preg for a celeb nowadays is an insurance policy by women! ...it consists of notGettingBrokeAssurance; lifeAssurance; freeVIP sitAssurance _just say dnt you know me;am wizkid babymama ...hv yu been fvrking living under the rocks!

Now you know the reason why he sang daddy yo! not daddy one or daddy two ... Der ar still more 2 come!

OgidiOlu3:
^^^ Wow swagguElite. Great story. Your Dad must have a PhD in Psychology. Reminds me of what Meryl Streep's character did in The Devil Wears Prada.
Op, you should learn from this story. Don't revolt, don't show anger. Just be calm and find a way to play your games well. You said you are more senior so it means there'll be things you know that this junior colleague doesn't. You can use it to your advantage. You can teach him these things and make sure your bosses are aware of it. Remember though that the junior colleague is not your enemy.

thanks bro!.. Thats exactly my point! ... The junior colleague is no enemy at all! ...don't fight! ... don't quit!

By the way you can watch HOUSE OF CARDS SERIES ... My Dad n I watch it 2geda all the time ... You will learn ao to be bold,lie,cause trouble,solve problems n get wat yu want by doing relatively Nothing! ...psychology is a great weapon

...people who understand psychology possess mastery of sarcasm n ability to drive yu crazy! ... I envy dem!

Relax ... Whosoever is doing this to you! ...is trying 2 bring you down! ...trying 2 make you feel you ar nt as important as you feel!

It is a normal tin for people in your situation 2 react angrily coz it doesn't feel right giving an appointment meant for a senior to a junior! ... Everyone knows dis ...including that your junior colleague ...he is nt your enemy here ... Am veri sure he would be surprised he was given the appointment instead of you! ...try 2 put yourself in his shoes ...he is aware further appointments go to senior colleagues with more experience ...him being chosen surprises him as you do!

I remembered when my dad was in the ministry ...he was notoriously against the management. ..all his colleagues n junior colleagues loved dat about him! ... If he even said the director was stupid in his remark ...he will still say it in his front n defend it! ...there was dis confidence!

My mom always warned him but since me n my brothers always laugh whenever he repeats wat he had done in his office in a comical way! ... He continued! ...

His boss was later transfered (based on management decision nt by my dad's actions) n a new director was brought in ...very friendly boss! ...but the thing was when he was leaving the office the transferred boss met wit my dad's new boss to influence him to choose a new director whom was a junior to my dad even when my dad was the most qualified Senior colleague to be passed the Barton!

My dad heard dat his appointment was about to be given to Yinka his junior colleague thru his boss driver ... He was invited by his boss d next day for a meeting ... My dad carried yinka his junior colleague along ...N:B the meeting was not about the appointment issue ...it was just a random meeting!

My dad having discussed wit his boss ...invited yinka inside n told his boss that he has been thinking that since he would b leaving in a few months ...the ministry should b left in good hands ...in yinka's hands! ... Yinka was not aware of anything so he was quite surprised! ...including the boss! ...he was asked why?

My dad mentioned dat he has noticed yinka ...n even though his is senor he has always wanted to b like yinka ...cool headed, honest ,humble n very good at making quick decisions! ...my Dad told us yinka was blushing not knowing my dad was trying 2 pull a HOUSE OF CARDS MOVE on him!

His boss was arguing against yinka being put in charge trying 2 pretend dat he wasn't going 2 put yinka since he has been influenced! ...but my dad kept on insisting n supported his argument that youths should be encouraged to lead! ...n he later ended with stating dat Mr yinka is d best candidate here ...you're missing on a great opportunity if yu refuse to seize this one!

He stood up n left ... With yinka thanking him all day for his support! ...the next month my dad was appointed the new Director ... His boss now told ao his former boss influenced him to pick yinka over him n he was surprised dat my dad stood for yinka d next day ...he said THE MANAGEMENT DOES NOT NEED A YOUTH ...IT NEEDS SOMEONE WHO STANDS FOR THE YOUTHS ...my dad was just saying .. ehn ehn! ..pretending he knew nothing!

My dad played the mind game on them n defeated his former boss ... Got respect of his new boss n became a godfather of yinka & ors hu heard wat he did for yinka! .... He wasn't a saint but he killed three birds with a spoon n he got as much followers without slaying on Instagram!

I will say no more ...I hope yu pick one or two lessons! ... Pardon the long speech! ...n my typographical errors ...am not perfect ...but I will be!

C'mon OP you post Hush puppi did dis ...did dat! ...n yet you're not aware of where he gets his money from! ...OR what he does for a living!

Meanwhile ...EFCC could just look into this guy! ... He trends because he spends lots of money on frivolities n yet not even EFCC can place an agent on him watching his every move all day... every day.

Onli God knows where he gets his money from ...who knows a politician might hv buried billions under his apartment (n probably forgotten where he hid it ...they are sometimes when we hide something n we don't remember where we placed it ...right!)

n he decided not to blow the whistle but spend the money by first changing his name from Emmanuel Ogundimu to Captain Hush puppi n pushing his name 2 nairaland's front page by constant spending

...trust me if he got dat money legit ..he won't b spending like dis!

Check dat out ....swag n beauty! ... All you nid to possess as a Queen of kings!

Proudly BossNation!

I feel her pain! ...getting punched is not easy at all

...at first contact;the punch makes yu feel like yuar in a cloud no noise _no hearing of your own voice

N later your head starts feeling like a first-sex experience all day!

Franzinni:
He was curious.... To know if it was fake or real

I already knew it was fake...

Meek mill... Was tired of waiting 3 months to smash... Everytime she had to go do maintainance.. For those silicon implants..


So.... He bounced..

....this nigga is morefvking crazy!

True talk! ... Hv recently developed a syndrome of not eating every morning before a lecture unless on lecture free days!

... Its realli hard to cook food before early morning lectures since one cannot say ao many hours the beans will take in getting done! ...it might even get done! ...but will not have the time to eat dat morning until yu come back in d afternoon n realized dat yu forgot 2 add salt!

True talk!

"One day, I was in Ikeja Lagos, I stopped a Taxi Driver, and we were going, on our way, he suddenly stopped and started beating me, I asked him what I did, he refused to answer me, he kept on beating me"

"She reported to the nigeriapoliceforce and she was told to go home and sort it out as family."

... Abeg Wetin dey happen? ... Ao is the driver Family ... Am nt understanding!

Immanuel very important person ... kuku shoot me!

Beautiful! ...

I love the pics 1 & 4 .... Check out d French curve on dat miss @ pics 1

MrBrownJay1:
You gotta be honest with your babe, no point pretending to be who you are not (as you are discovering each other). That's the only way you gonna succeed in A) being comfortable around one another and B) open up to let her in, thus making her understand your "possible" issues... If you can't TRUST her, then you have no business being naked dipping between her legs. I am not talking about a one night stand here, but your WOMAN.

Continuing to fukc someone when you know you are about to explode, WHILE you haven't satisfied your babe, is sexual BLASPHEMY.... You MUST stop, and when she asks why, you tell her that you are managing you energy.... And After a while, your feeling of exploding will naturally go away, so that you can bring out your superman moves.

Anybody who try to fake who they truly are in the bedroom, will fail.... Be honest with her, from the get go.

hmmmn! Sexual blasphemy ...I respect your opinion Sir ... learnt something todae! It feels gud!

Maccarthy:
thanks for this advice i really know where i stand now.

con mucho gusto ...Amigo!

I understand you go thru all these! ... I did experience this before! ... Am saying before due to the fact that I realised that I never did develop the spirit of standing up in classes Nd asking questions from lecturers or public speakers

For you to be able to stand confidently in front of people ...you must be able to stand confidently in the middle of people ___ Before you lead ...you must follow!

What do I mean by this? ... If yuar the kind of person who finds it difficult to freely ask questions by raising yur hands n standing up in the middle of people ...you will definitely develop cold feet while presenting in the front of your fellow men!

Hv heard of the need to develop your confidence in front of the mirror but trust me ...yuar doing yurself no good if yu partake in such. All yu need do; is to engage in asking questions whether stupid or self explanatory questions ....just make sure you can confidently raise your hand up n speak in the crowd! ...dats the first step

By the time yu begin 2 ask n answer questions like dat! ...yu will develop dis sort of confidence gradually sprouting in your spine that you are not afraid of standing out in the crowd!

Coz that the most important thing people don't know! ... Take a look at this ...you hv a presentation ...yu made your researches ... Yu made sure yu rehearsed in your apartment before d due date

... N yu made quite a wonderful performance having marked yourself based on your facingTheMirrorPresentationPerformance ...after which yu were given the Mic in the hall or classroom n yu began to wumble,fumble n rumble your way through repeated sentences n shaky lines of points!

Later ...Yuar over there seating on the walkway wondering ao come yu went blank in yur presentation! ... The problem is nt your lack of knowledge but lack of Confidence of StandingOutsideYourComfortZone ...people who get affected by this are mostly
1) people who don't engage in asking n answering of questions in a class or group discussion

2) people who get easily influenced by what other people think n say about them!

3) n lastly people who don't dress properly well ... They often tend to get distracted by the fact that they are standing in front of the crowd with a brown patched black suit! ...or unzipped pants

Little tins like this gets you distracted ...when yuar distracted yu loose focus ...you loose focus ...you gain distraction! ...back n forth ...back n forth ...dats y yu kip repeating statements over and over again!

*** Pardon my typographical errors ...am not perfect but I will be!

Big man! ...just relax! ... Am nt going 2 discourage you ...you are from a broken home ...no money ...no family to run to ...no job! ...if yu continue 2 live in this unprecedented wretched life of yours ...you will starve to death watching yur fellow friends who are engaging in dirty ventures getting fat pockets n buying yur dream cars

As at now ...Yur veri chance is to roll with them and learn ao dey go about deir operation right! ...yes! ... Wat an idea! ...a foolish one!

Like I said earlier ... Am nt going 2 discourage but help you! ..achieve yur goal! ....yur goal is majorly to get rich n stop living this miserable life of yours! ...all you need do is get close to yur friends who you know engage in frivolous spending after deir operation Nd get a loan from them ....Nd engage your investments in agro-business!

Get a big farm,get involved in the planting of plantain or yam (I read some few minutes ago ...a thread in d FP talking about yam business Nd ao yu can earn millions thru exporting such)
.... CHECK FOR THE THREAD ...READ IT UP ND MAKE MORE RESEARCHES!

Meanwhile! ... Get engaged in sales boy employment! ...yu will work under your boss ...earning little amount money compared to the money yu borrowed in funding your farm! ... At least yu will gain knowledge on ao how to run a shop Nd engage in farming at the same time ...c"Mon yu can't tell me yuar going 2 do nothing while waiting for your yam/plaintain to grow ...

This way yuar killing two birds with a spoon! ... Whenever yuar free visit your farm ... Give farm produce as gift to your master at the shop yuar working ...he will appreciate dat little gift n build a closer relationship with you which could lead you to have an easier way of introducing your farm products to the market using a little portion of his shop!

...thereby saving money in renting a shop ... N trust me you will get more money since his customers will become your customer!

I wished I had yahoo yahoo friends ... I would hv done dis Nd stop wasting my time studying law! ... Nd buying expensive textbooks!

Nonetheless! ... I love my profession still!

__ forgive my typographical errors am not perfect ...but I will be!

MrBrownJay1:
Bro, you are gay, NO questions about it, and there is NOTHING wrong with it. Just accept that, while in Africa, you must repress your homosexuality, unless you wanna be lynched mercilessly.

Pls don't date women to pretend that you are what you are not, as you are spoiling market by taking away good babes from us hetero guys. We all know how these babes like to hang with y'all, until you slide and foolishly become bf (thinking you can miraculously turn straight)

Furthermore, pls do NOT cokcblock us in clubs/bars etc, by pretending that you are these single babes BFs, and instead know your place.
Thanks

MrBrownJay ... Well'don sire

Chill Bro ...if what you said is true ...I mean the part where yu stated yu hv been approached by guys whom you presume gays Nd you felt grossed out!

It is possible you are not realli gay! ... Coz ao will you be grossed out by male approaches n yet yu don't feel anything for ladies either! .... Thats messed up! ...realli realli messed up!

By the way ...I don't think you are gay! ...coz it is possible you;like everyone else admire handsome guys ...its normal ...but In yur case ...yuar thinking yuar being gay maybe because some class of people must have referred to you as gay based on body walking signature or yur body standing posture

OR sometimes it could be dat yuar handsome and light in complexion n possesses a luscious pressure of pink lips ....I don't know! ..where I stay ..ladies refer to people wit these features as gay! ...weird right!

MrBrownJay1:
^^^^ any man using drugs to last in bed will be slaves to these drugs FOREVER, until his dikc won't function any longer, whether you take ONE pill or the whole box.

A man should FIRST understand that lasting in bed doesnt mean a woman would be satisfied, then SECOND he must Learn/discover with his babe what turn her on, what stimulates her, and FINALLY,when he starts having sex, as soon as he feels that he might explode, pull out and focus on something else for 5 mins (rather coochie, for example) before continuing mounting her... et voila!

...hmmn! ... ! MrBrownJay ... I once had this notion of yours! ...trust me ...der is no pulling out for 5mins during s3x ... Unless yuar prepared to answer yur gf why yu stopped

... lemme guess yuar going 2 say " babe! Am just trying to get my mind off cuming inside you" ... Her next reply would be : " So quick! ... We just started few minutes ago! " ...with her face showing her downright disappointment in your lack of stamina on bed!

...trust me I would rather swim in a pool filled wit electric sockets ...than pass through such scenario coz am veri sure she will tell her bestie ao weak yu were after all the bullefproof bluffs about your blackhammer being d iroko of all trees in d forest

...they all tell their bestie everything! ...its weird but damn true! ...