₦airaland Forum

Achilies:
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As I said u can't understand.
When a woman says a man is an animal in a sensual way. Ask her what she means.

My kind of guys.

CrazyMan:
At last someone understands me...maturity and trust is what keeps marriages going. The moment childishness and mistrust creeps in, that marriage is bound to collapse.

You are right, ofcourse people should marry someone they love who loves them back, love alone isn't enough, I know, still, love remains a very important ingredient, if someone loves you, they should be able to trust you, especially as regards this aspect.

CrazyMan:
Like I stated earlier, my passwords belong to me, and if I decide to keep them to myself, then she must respect that.

Second how does keeping passwords to confidential mails translates to I'm cheating on her? Childishness is what is killing marriages these days. You want to know every move your husband makes, eveasdropping on his calls, even going through his laptop when he's in the bathroom...etc. That attitude alone shows that there's no trust in that marriage. And if not properly checked, believe me, that marriage would collapse.


No woman I paid bride price for can deny me sex for 3weeks for no good reason. 2 nights alone and she must tell me what the hell her problem is.

If her problem is worth waiting for three weeks (could be medical, religious related...etc) then I would respect her decision and wait...if it isn't, then we would sort ourselves out there and then and continue our sexual life.


Me thinks if you don't want malice, hatred, anger...etc to crawl into your marriage, you must learn to trust your husband and respect whatever decision he makes.

If he's playing his role as a good husband, of what use is his password or any other irrelevant thing to you? I believe you should also play your role as a good wife and stop allowing the devil plant unnecessary suspicion through you in that marriage.

Wow! You are the male version of me, my lover can have my password if he asks but if I sense that he's asking because he doesn't trust me, then I highly likely won't give him, he should respect my wishes just like I should his, I don't like men with unattractive traits like, too much possessiveness and controlling nature, these kind of people are the ones who think like the OP , and I honestly believe they have no self confidence and are a turn off.

babyfaceafrica:
Anybody who thinkss you are a cheat because you exhibit one or all of this behaviours has trust issues..and anyone with trust issues is immature

I used to wonder if I was weird for thinking this way too, I mean, why do I have to monitor you and feel insecure because you gist with other girls? I don't feel threatened by anyone, call it pride or whatever, it is just what it is. Unless you are acting up and I need to be sure and trust me, when someone doesn't want you, it shows.

Highest, i'll leave with my pride intact, why beg someone to be with you?

Rajjah:
U av much s*xual urge or u re too handsome?

It's more like, he appears to women, as though he is a stereotype, alpha male, that is.

Best Google "Alpha male"

Just like a "femme fatale" (without the seemingly evil part that is ).

I love me an alpha male, there's something sexy about him.

These two actually make a good combination.

Men love your wives and quit complaining and looking for reasons to justify your cheating, the servant of jah has spoken.

It's the women who allow these men trample on them that I blame.

I agree that no1 can be a problem for some people but I don't think there's a big deal with having an opposite $ex you are close to,especially as regards relationships, ofcourse, there'll be healthy jealousy(which I find cute btw),honest people who are genuinely into each other, have no issues being straight with themselves, it's difficult to lie to someone you really like,(atleast when the lie is flimsy),you just don't want to hurt them.

Just know where to draw the line and you'll be good.

.

Olufemiolaolu:
ok ooooo sweetcocoa. Its easier said than done.

There's nothing hard about it, you can leave if you want to, just have some humanity and decency while at it. Some things should come natural.

Olufemiolaolu:
Hypocrite, can u cope under dis situation too? Shey ur engine no go knock as a result dis ni?

This isn't about coping or not, I may not be able to cope, but I won't threaten to divorce my husband, more so, in such an embarrassing manner, for something that is not of his own making.

They should channel their anger/frustration to the government than their husbands, is all I'm saying.

I can manage weaving of hair, depending on some factors like, his occupation and handsomeness.

This is actually not a laughing matter but it's funny anyways.

Something urgently needs to be done about the pollution, these women should be sympathizing with their hubbies, given that the "weakness" is not the men's fault, instead of saying they'd be divorced, the made it seem like the men are just lazy/bad in bed, I'd be embarrassed, was I one of these men.

These women no get sense.

MizMyColi:
May you never lack understanding.

While it is every normal lady's wish to get married.
Some of us don't carry it on our faces like a signboard of sorts.

We just know that when it's time to take that next step, the interstellar and interplanetary bodies'll allign for us.

You may be surprised to find out that, not really all women want to get married.

I know a few, sometimes I think I don't even wan to, other times when I think of my future kids, I feel, it's best to get married but only if I'm sure to an extent, it will be something close to "happily ever after"

Never said any of these prayers, I already know whatever will be will be, why bother my pretty head?.

Thankfully, the practice no longer has much weight like it used to.

stonecoldcafe:
Why would you keep making excuses for the accused and you curse out the innocent. Thats how the other day someone was asking the lady that complained about the bursar what she wore to his office. When would you guys direct the question to the right people.

WHAT WAS THE PRIEST DOING INSIDE A ROOM (ALONE) WITH A FEMALE?

WHY DID HE UNHOOK HER BRA?

WHY DID HE GIVE HER £100 FOR UNDIES? IS THAT WHAT HE WAS TAUGHT IN SEMINARY SCHOOL?

WHY DID HE RUN AWAY WHEN HE HAD A CASE TO ANSWER IN THE UK? IF HE WAS INNOCENT WHY DID HE NOT RETURN AFTER HIS FATHER'S BURIAL?

WHY DID HE APOLOGISE TO THE CHURCH IF HE WAS NOT WRONG?

IF HE WAS RIGHT, WHY IS HE NO LONGER A PRIEST?

WHY WILL HE BE DEPORTED AND WHY IS HIS NAME ON THE SEXUAL REGISTER FOR 10 SOLID YEARS

[size=18pt]ASK THE RIGHT QUESTIONS AND STOP MAKING EXCUSES FOR EVIL; UNLESS YOUR UNREPENTANT TYPE WILL JOIN HIM TOMORROW.[/size]

The father is definitely not innocent,you don't go looking for $ex when you vowed to stay off it, then again, we all know not all who claim one thing or other, are actually what they claim.

This lady isn't totally innocent either, one thing I've come to realize about $sexual relations with men is that, you really have to be firm, if you say "no" then act in accordance with it, a man who gave you money for undies and told you he loved you, asked for a kiss and you brought your cheek?when you are not interested? Seriously?

Why was she even in his room, when she already knew he was sexually interested in her? Yea, it's not a crime to help him out, but a sensible girl will not be alone in such a man's room, especially since she knows he had such intentions, instead she stood there, allowed her bweast to be fondled and then turn around to cry blue murder, I feel like slapping this lady .

A friend I've known for years traveled out, on his return, I went to visit him, dude tried to touch me inappropriately, you needed to the see struggle, I had to kick his new laptop across the room, took to my heels and immediately deleted all about him, if I had thought, "he's my friend na, I don't want to be enemies" and smiled sheepishly,maybe saying "stop na, what are you doing?" with hope that he'd not really r*pe me, what do you think would have happened?

This Rev even has some self control sef, doesn't change the fact that he is an 1diot sha.

Btw, the lady in the thread about the bursar, slapped him hard to register her displeasure.

I condemn what this man did with every fiber of my being but this lady isn't totally innocent, seems to me she encouraged this useless father.

He asked for a kiss and you brought your cheek, like seriously? From the story, the man didn't want to r*pe her, he probably felt, "seems she's interested o, make I try my luck" and the yeye girl couldn't even resist, you stood there and he undid your bra, how old is this girl? Don't even tell me you were scared because he is a Rev, that fact, is the more reason why you should have given him a resounding slap, because he is obviously a sham of a Rev, I wonder why she then told, yeye dey smell.

True, sexual assaulters are evil, still, ladies please, stop putting yourselves in such positions, avoid it all you can,especially by not sending mixed signals, let your signal be very clear, don't behave like all these useless network providers in Naija, you can be friends with a guy but let him know in bold statements where you stand.

harveyspec:
I'm in a fix kind off

I'm 28, she is 23, she is my first, we are clocking 1yr6months. I have gone to see her father, not to declare my intentions per say but based on invitation, he wanted to know the man dating his daughter. His questions bothered on my job & my family

We haven't had sex but there has been romance. The thing is I'm tired of the relationship.
Am I bored? No
Have I found someone else? No
Do I love her? Yes
Is our communication level good? Yes & no

Why the burnout?
I really poured in my best into the relationship, wanting to know about her, showing care & love in every aspect of her life (academics,finance,siblings, spiritual, physical etc)

Now that I'm tired, some things I had previously ignored, seems a
Big deal to me & also there is this psychological feeling of she is my first, try someone else too


I taught her something about open lines of communication, so when there is an issue we talk about it but it seems she kind of took advantage of it, knowing fully well that I will want to play by such rule. Gradually I began to feel cheated, seeing all the effort I put in & not seeing her's up to a commensurate level.

There was a time I told her I wasn't doing to put in any effort & that it was her time to work, but that yielded no result.

In this 1yr6months, I have called off the relationship on 4 counts, on all counts she cried & pleaded, because I loved her & also the fear of her hurting herself, I find myself rescinding my decision.

What I resolved to do was next occurrence, I won't call it off but withdraw gradually, well it happened again, I withdrew but it was abrupt & we haven't spoken for 2weeks now

She has tried everything & I haven't bulged & don't plan to.

I have resolved that the next relationship, I won't put in 100%, but unleash them in increasing level slowly to prevent this kind of burnout(I'll give myself time before I start the next one, my plan is to make friends:no strings attached)

Herein lies my concern

1. Where do I start from( this was my first relationship, I don't know how to flirt or chase after girls, dont even have them as friends per say)

2. Will I find someone better, folks have been drumming it in my ears that the devil you know.....

3. Hope I ain't making a mistake

Finally, I have my own faults, one being am very principled & whenever there was an issue, she always took the reconciliation step.

Thanks

Cc:babyosisi, cococandy, freecocoa

Seun or his mods banned me for what I don't even know, anyways.

From your story, I get you are fed up with the relationship and that has something to do with you being the one doing all the work in the relationship, well, once you are fed up, nothing can be done about it, so I suggest you just let her go, still, it would be honorable if you let her know you are breaking up with her and why so.

1.There's nothing to it, ladies are scattered all over the place, you can start up a chat with any one you fancy and see where things lead, church, Cinema, Mall, Eateries, etc, these are some of the places you meet people,it's not hard, you just have to be confident, engaging and polite.

2. I don't know what you mean by "someone better" but no matter how 'complete' you think a person is, there's always someone more 'complete', that still doesn't change the fact that we are all unique and awesome in our own special way.

3.Search your heart to find what you look for, I believe you have thought this through, so only you know what you really want, if you were still interested in the relationship, it would have been a different ball game, but you are fed up, that alone has settled the matter, you can't force it and you shouldn't, because she'll be at the receiving end, you don't keep breaking up with someone you want.

Goodluck.

I honestly don't understand how someone can be a christian, pray fervently, recite all the bible portions(even the ones that say you'll lift scorpions/serpents without getting hurt, have thousand peeps and things fall on you without a scratch, bind whatever you want etc)and still be afraid of nightmares or supposed attacks, abeg what's the point of being a christian and believing all what's written in the bible?

See the so called christians sef shouting, "relocate" up and down, as if whatever is chasing them from their house can't follow them some place else(given that their prayers haven't helped), smh.

Seems the man has a nut running loose in his head, a man who was dancing inappropriately in presence of his in- laws and wife to be is not going to make a good husband if you asked me, he even still left after pleas from his bride, I wonder what kind of marriage that would be.

All these elders sef, them too like to overdo things, 82 goats kwa? Haa na wa o.

I could swear that the fact about refs favoring players in red is so true, Man u comes to mind.

She shouldn't have grabbed his privates, okada people sef too like wahala, she's lucky to be alive.

Idowuogbo:
I dey tey you....if I were the bloke proposing,her reaction would defo get me thinking the babe don get another bidder wey she wan marry. Can you imagine, all through the damn video she couldn't even come up with a yes or no answer. Oshisko! The shytest proposal ever liveth! Two mumu jam each other.

As in eh, I no fit just shout, mschew.

SHOCK7:
Be serious, why did u remove it?

I'm serious na, I didn't lemove it.

SHOCK7:
True!but where is 'ur pro.pic?

It's there na, didn't you see it?.

SHOCK7:
Aha,U shuld know Datz a "figure of speech"not literally!

When it's said(especially in this part of the world), it is meant way more than literal, they practically believe the 'snatcher' is responsible for whatever who was being snatched does.

Hmm, sounds like it's more than just $ex for you with this mistress of yours, if things are this serious with you both then there's a chance your wife knows, Chai! I don't envy her at all.

I don't know what is more disturbing, people stealing with reckless abandon or people applauding these thieves, calling them smart.

It's really a pity.

But people get mind o, how do you disappear with someone's money without any fear/guilt? Na wa o.

MissMeiya:
I had no idea he was that way. If I did I never would have said it. I feel terrible.

No, I can't do that.

Lol, then you are taking him/his mods way too serious, he banned me for saying he doesn't listen to advice which everybody know is true but I no send am.

MissMeiya:
You see, you know it's unlikely. The question is, why is Seun angry?

If by now you haven't realized that Seun is an autocrat then you don't know anything about him, forget about him being angry and just clear the air by giving us a name.