₦airaland Forum

tatatar:
Did you just wake up from years of coma

No he did not, pure water is N5 and 3 for N20 is some places, especially in the North.


But the price skyrocketed all of a sudden, a bag of sachet water jumped from N80 to N150.

I think so, and we will still witness like five or six more before the year ends.

victorian:
Thank you!

Tribalism is one of the huge problems we have in this country, from leadership roles to the grass root.

Tribalism.

Until people learn and accept to support what's good for the country, than which tribe is good for the country before things will start to take shape in the right direction.

Tribalism is patriotism in its truest form.


Nigerians are not tribalists, they're patriots to their individual nations that are forced into one country.

A tribalistic Yoruba person is a patriotic Odua person,
Same with an Igbo, tribalist in their eyes of Nigeria but a patriot in the eyes of Biafra. Same with hausa and others.


Our problem is not Tribalism, our problem is our diversity

Sixfeetbelle:
I would say the guy was never interested in her in the first place. He saw an avenue to relieve himself sexually and took it. Although, in a few rare times, other reasons may abound.

1) Horrible sex, wide kitten etc,
2) Clingy attitude. Some assume wife behaviour after sex when the guy is still trying to understand his feelings etc.


Which is why I advocate for proper courtship and dating before anything sexual. Or a defined beginning before the start of the relationship (eg will it lead to marriage or are we fooling around?)

Sometimes playing hard to hard, I am too smart and insincerity from the woman are among the reasons.



I don't just ask a woman out like that, it takes me time. First thing I do if I am really interested is plant my seed of friendship and watch it grow but some ladies are something else.


Sometimes you will go to a lady with a genuine interest and she will take you for granted or a fool, she will want you for a everything except what you want her for.

Some will neither refuse nor agree, they will just keep you there pending when they get tired of trying to get Emeka's attention.

They do this thinking we are unaware of what is going but we are, we truly are and that is when we demote them to "point and kill" list.

Once she get tired of noticing guys that ain't noticing her, she will start noticing you, not knowing that you've gotten tired along the line and are just waiting for the fish to be ready.

Once served, you will eat to your fill and go...


@OP



Do us a favor and add "some" in your title.

Shugavee:
broke meaning someone who can’t take care of himself properly Moreless a woman . Every woman hv her preferences,, base on her level .

Why should he take care of himself and the woman?

ABIAfirstman:
He is correct, Abia is the worst state in Nigeria. We have the worst roads in Nigeria, we have the dirtiest environment in Nigeria. Infact tell me one area Abia is better than any other state in Nigeria.

I don't know, I am not from Abia but I have always thought Kogi state is the worst in Nigeria.

Dc900:
TodayAbia state is by far the worst state in Nigeria

Abia is the worst state in Nigeria? Worst in what aspect really and how did you come to the conclusion?

You can relate well with what the OP is saying if you're a Catholic that doesn't miss morning mass.



No matter how early you're, you will see them hurrying home like they went to earlier morning mass. Y'know, that kind 4am mass


I didn't know why when I was a kid but now I know that they're returning from over-night mass.

ContractKiller:
The Landlord Association of the area and even emergency response crews all attested that there was no pipeline vandalism before the explosion.

If there was no vandalism or tampering, then how did the pipe develop a leak? Did it develop a leak on its own!

And why were 3 Churches amongst the buildings destroyed?

Churches now follow people dey drag house for residential areas. I live in-between two churches(something I will never wish my enemy). Assuming this happened in my area, (God forbid) it will affect three RCCG churches. RCCG alone.

GreatResearcher:
Imagine how and where Nigeria would be if it is govern by atheists

No difference. US president is a Christian and he's not doing any of this nonsense.



Religion is not the problem of blacks, it is something else, something that I don't know yet.

MrBrownJay1:
here is a simple clue: if your child's teacher has sex with your underage daughter, after grooming her that this is what she needs to do (to be a good student)... would you believe its rape or believe that because child said YES, it isnt rape?!

This is a ridiculous clue. If the above scenario happens to my daughter(God forbid) the man will be arrested for statutory rape because the girl is a minor so her consent doesn't matter.


But if the lady is an adult then you can't arrest the man for rape. Disciplinarian action can be taken against him for breaking the school rules and teacher/student guidelines but never rape.

I stopped reading @

As at the time we got married he had NOTHING

because that is the first lie and I don't have the appetite for more.


Every living person has something and I am sure he didn't marry you on credit

eyinjuege:
There is no difference really.
You cannot shout about evil step mums and how they should allow their step children stay in peace with their father, while asking a step father not to rise up and be supportive of his wife's children from a previous relationship.

You can chose to see it as the same, it is all okay but that's not the reality.

A child belongs to his father unless in certain situations where the father bluntly rejects the child. Now, when a woman is raising a step son, she's sure that this child belongs to the family she's is also part of.

But when you're raising the child of single mom, it is different, the father usually shows up and the mother will have no option than to hand him over.

This happened just last year.

Nobody in outside knows that Hillary doesn't belong to the man we thought is his father, none of our mates, just the elders and they're quiet about it.


Last year, the kinsmen where sharing something, when it came to Hillary's turn, he was told that he was not part of them. Obviously that was the first time he was getting to know to about it because he was broken.

He told his mother to tell him who his father is, she did after much persuasion and now he's working on reuniting them since the man is still unmarried.

Now how about the man that raised him? Well, he lost all and is about to lose his wife.


This here is the difference and it's so in many places.

The man has a lot to lose and the woman doesn't lose anything. Women don't fight step kids because they will be taken away, they fight them because they want their own kids to be first in everything.

This here is another different.

Sometimes our opinion and view of people doesn't change reality. I am a live and let live person but people still kill each other.

My independent view of life is not the reality, that's my point.

eyinjuege:
You can't speak with both sides of the mouth.

I am not. Like I said, I was raised by a single parent so my opinion here is greatly influenced by life experiences. If for any reason I ended up being a single parent, I will forget marriage.

Why?

Because it's a disaster waiting to happen.

eyinjuege:
This child in question doesn't have his father around, and yet a man wants him to be homeless and not stay with the only other parent he has around.

The daughter too doesn't have a father around and she's not hopeless, this is where you lots are supposed to take a break and ask "but why"

His brother doesn't want the boy to stay with him, in fact none of her siblings want anything to do with the boy.

Take a break now and ask "but why"

Like I said, the problem in issues like this is that we all get emotional and fail to see things from the husband's perspective.

eyinjuege:
We have wickedness embedded in our DNA. Real wickedness. This is worse than witchcraft. When will the needs of a child starts superseding the ego of an adult, my people?

There are so many homeless kids around everyone in Nigeria, how. Many are you training? None I guess, then if this is witchcraft, you're a witch.


You don't know what happens to a man when what he has invested in emotionally and financially is taken away from him. This OP didn't move on because they broke up, she moved on because she got tired of waiting, believe you me, she will go back to the man if she comes back.

I'm not I a nice guy when it comes to unwillingly shouldering other people's responsibility.

Life expectancy in Nigeria is too short for me to pierce myself with unnecessary sorrows because of something that is formless and directionless as love.

The man agreed initially to take the kids but later changed his mind about the boy "ask why"

eyinjuege:
Where is our humanity as a people?
My 1st cousin married a woman with a child , and they have 2 children together now. That boy from a previous union looks after his younger ones like a hawk.

Congrats to him for now. Shits usually don't happen in sowing stage. Wait until reaping stage then you will see that blood is thicker than water

eyinjuege:
Nobody from my part of the family (the step dad's side) treats him as an outsider. He comes to their grandma's (my aunt) place with his younger ones, and lives like the prince he is. Grandma is everyone's grandma to him.
He's just a child for God's sake.
Secondly, don't see children as possessions to be taken away at will by anybody.

I have addressed this already. How I as an individual see a child doesn't determine how a child will be treated. If I am marrying a single mom, it is on a condition that I will adopt the child with the consent of the child's dad. Count me out of anything other than this.

eyinjuege:
When we start seeing them as human beings, you will stop being afraid that a man he never grew up with will just come and take him from nowhere to claim him.

Look around the world.


Do you see how messed up it is?


All these were done by human beings. Humans are among if not the most dangerous creatures on earth.

Be very careful around one or it will end in tears.

eyinjuege:
Can't you render help to a stranger, talkmore of a child from your wife.

There is a limit to the amount of help I can render to a stranger.

The child is my wife's child, yes but the child is also another man's child.

See, it is easier to adopt kids with unknown origin than to take l a woman with her child when the father is still out there.

eyinjuege:
I'm sure you know people who are sending the children of poor people to school, and those children are living with them. I know those raising their house helps, and sending them to good schools. Are they planning to claim those househelps as their possession? Has that stopped them from rendering help, despite knowing the househlep will leave at some point and be 'claimed' by her people?

An entirely different scenario.

bukatyne:
The OP is even a new moniker.

A new person with a big problem.


It's a counter thread

TheArchangel:
https://www.nairaland.com/5728674/decision-right-wrong

The single father and wife story wahala
48hours later,
The single mother and husband story wahala.

Someone wants to keep me busy arguing over fake stories.

So it's a friendly match after all. Mtchewww.



No wonder there are so many loopholes in this one.

TheArchangel:
This story is serving as an equaliser to the previous story of 2days ago. The writers of these wonderful fake stories are exposing our laughable and one-sided hypocritic advises.

This is the troll season. Enjoy it while it last.

What did I miss?

Vyvyanvyvy:
Yes I will leave with all my children because they will be better with me than any one else

Best of luck

Vyvyanvyvy:
You want me to take my child to the orphanage whyle I’m still alive and in good health? You must be joking . I rather be a single mother and suffer with my 4 children than rejecting my son.

So if anything happens, you will leave with the kids you have for this man? Why do you like accumulating kids?

cococandy:
Oh simple.

He’s not ready to treat the child she had with another man as his own flesh and blood.

Isn’t that the very easy expectation y’all have when it comes to step moms?

Go ask step kids their experience with step moms. It is a good way to start.


And no woman comes to take the step kid away from the woman. They stay in the house because that is where they actually belongs

Not trying to make excuses for the man but these cases are different

Oyindidi:
Tallesty1

Lols.


You for just allow me to read and disappear usual without forming an opinion.


You see this issue of single moms and their husbands, it is always very complicated and women are usually pitied as if the men are evil.

Nobody sees things from the man's perspective.

I mean why should a woman in her normal senses have two kids for a man she isn't married to?

A child is acceptable, shits happen but two kids for a man you don't know his family house or any of his relations? The OP is not telling us the whole truth.

Or maybe the kids are from different fathers? That is even worse, it is terrible.

See eeh, raising this children is not the issue, the real problem is what will happen when their real father shows up.


It is clear from the write up that they were together until the man traveled to Italy, so they really didn't break up. Should the man come back tomorrow and give good reasons for no communication and ask the OP to come back to him, chances are she would accept, or at least give him his kids.


What then happens to the current husband? He will be left with nothing like Aaron.

This is why I say that if at all anything should join me with a single mom it will be on a condition that I will adopt the kid as mine and yes she must get the consent of the father.

No hating here.

I spent the best part of my childhood days under the care of a single mom that is married to a single father. Experience is the best teacher.

Okay here is another thing.

The lady here claims to be financially okay, in fact she claims to be responsible for 70% of the family expenses but the reason she can't be with her son is a bigger apartment.

You boast of being a giant financially but you live in a self con with your husband and two kids with a third around the corner.

The man was okay with the child living with them until he started stealing, so why didn't she rent a bigger apartment since she's okay financially?



Abeg make I leave matter for Mathias.



How are you doing my dear? It has really been a long time

cRobo:
So you are not afraid of me abi?

Laughable.




You've no experience when it comes dating a woman that asked you out so I told you to shut up because you were beginning to sound foolish.



How's that fear?


Abi I need to say yes to your question before you know that?

PrimadonnaO:
That feeling is merely fleeting.

For most people, it gets to a point when you simply don't want to be alone... you want someone you'll call your own.

That your own is your wife.



A girlfriend is never really your own.

cRobo:
Are you referring to me?

I quoted you directly

cRobo:
individual difference, I will forever respect any woman who is bold enough to state clear her desire about me

well it all depends on the maturity of the guy

only kids will take such for granted

such ladies are rare and so special its not an act of desperation but going for what you want

guys pleads with girl and also ladies pleads with guys

unless the are kids

Shut up sir

cRobo:
individual difference, I will forever respect any woman who is bold enough to state clear her desire about me

well it all depends on the maturity of the guy

only kids will take such for granted

such ladies are rare and so special its not an act of desperation but going for what you want

guys pleads with girl and also ladies pleads with guys

unless the are kids

Shut up sir

NaijaRoyalty:
You've seen the light my Yoruba Christian brother walahi, I'm so happy for you.

I feel irritated when I see this type of comment on this forum. Why is it so difficult for you people to see through Sarrik's mind games and childish gimmicks?


Dude is still the same zombie yesterday and forever.


He still works and will forever work for Buhari.


A quick question....


What did he see now in Buhari's second tenure that wasn't there since 1983? Why the sudden change of mind?

TRUTH is, it is mission accomplished for him. What else would he do for Buhari again? Campaign and vote for him for 3rd tenure?


That's not gonna happen. Sarriki has completed the Buhari project and is currently waiting for directives to work for APC's next presidential candidate.


Don't let him fool you what all this unnecessary anti Buhari posts.

It's all mind games

SassyGem101:
Hey.. I won't have you or anyone make jest of him.

After you made jest of him bah?




BTW, short people are the same irrespective of gender