₦airaland Forum

Smellymouth:
Good day Mr. Chairman,Moderator, Panel of Judges,Time Keeper,Co-debaters and Distinguished Ladies and Gentlemen..

My names are SmellyM0uth ALAGA1. I am here to support the motion which says that---"Most men of today are the weaker sex and can't control themselves emotionally.."



Listen and be blessed

Guy, you get work at all so? The way you just dey redesign every topic for nairaland with your pics na another thing entirely. Any FP topic nowadays without your funny pictures is incomplete.

Isn't this the genesis of the issue?

ijustdey:
He later confessed that he was the one who took the video while they were slaughtering one of the victims during the Enugu killings. In the video, you could hear him shouting and saying in Hausa ‘I have killed you now. You think that you can kill Fulani herdsmen and go free’. He personally took the picture to show his family members that he was actually successful and participated in the killings”, the police source stated.

ijustdey:
Ifeanyi said “A man from Opanda whose name was never mentioned said he came in contact with his Fulani friend who warned him to leave Uzouwani with his family and run for his life saying they had recruited over five hundred armed men from Niger and Nasarawa states to attack Uzouwani on Monday. The man said he asked the Fulani man the target but the Fulani man could not tell him. He only said the attack would not happen at Opanda. Before then, they had relocated their cattle to Benue”

“Another man who spotted them at their camp at Ameke was in his farm when he saw them. He wanted to run but they told him not to run because they were not after him. They told him they were going to another community for revenge and not their community. The man came back and raised the alarm and the security agencies were alerted immediately through the Caretaker Committee chairman of Uzouwani LGA, Hon. Cornel Onwubuya”, he explained further.

Mr. Ifeanyi Onyeabor claimed he had no idea what the Fulani herdsmen avenged but another source who would not want to be mentioned has a good information. The source said his Fulani friend came to him and showed him a picture of a Fulani man who was butchered at Uzouwani and they claimed it was Nimbo people that killed him because they also discovered a grave in Nimbo where two Fulani men were buried upside-down.

“He came to my house at Opanda one week before the attack and showed me the pictures. He came with two pictures, one has the image of a man that was sliced like bread and the other has an image of a man whose belly was sliced open and his intestines were removed. He told me that they discovered a grave in Nimbo where two of their people were buried upside-down and they attributed the other two killings to Nimbo people. He told me that they will attack Uzouwani but he never mentioned Nimbo”, the source revealed.

lereinter:
how do we know a tyres' reqiured pressure fpr pumping

akinladejo:
Please what of the air pressure how do one know how many u will pump into the tyre? Cos is not stated on it.

There was a thread on the front page a few days back with regard to pressure

https://www.nairaland.com/3075502/major-cause-tyre-burst-accidents
https://www.nairaland.com/3080026/major-cause-tyre-burst-accidents

erico2k2:
I did not see the expiry date on it as claimed by plenty on here.I heard tyres have expiring dates well in Nigeria.

Tyres expire in 6 years from the date of manufacture, although I have read on several sites that it's 4 years in Nigeria. Whichever the case may be, you can calculate the expiry date based on the date of manufacture of the tyre.

The link below sheds more light on tyre expiry dates
http://www.tiresafetygroup.com/tires-expire-in-six-years/

masterblogger:
I must confess that ABU is the best school in Nigeria A school were you have NO option of sorting lecturers, you must read to pass, selling of handout is prohibited , NO submitting of assignment with money, NO exam malpractice (if caught its automatic rustication/expel), NO any form of extortion by lectures themselves or through class reps et .

90% of Nigeria graduates in other universities have sorted , paid for handout or assignment in one way or the other .

ABU is certainly the best and I will definitely go there for my masters .

An ABU graduate is ahead of you naturally.

#truetalk

This one here is a masterjoker

I just came across a post shared on Facebook by a certain 'Bimal Nandana' which contains everything you need to know about tyres, having this information is very handy especially when buying a new tyre.

Source: https://www.facebook.com/bimal.nandana/media_set?set=a.1197381386962478.1073741830.100000718838852&type=3

9 yellow cards for tottenham, must be a new league record.

Smellymouth:
See as she resemble denrele...




VOTE MIMZY FOR MISS NL 2016

I was about to say the same thing...

Rapmoney:
This is a high level of lawlessness in a foreign land. I witnessed this at Okorodudu Junction, along Effurun-Sapele Road this evening.

This white man shamelessly parked his car on the road and started urinating, right there in the very presence of everyone; as busy as that junction is!!! If a Nigerian tries this in this man's country, the resultant effect will be very disastrous!!!

You can't have separate rules for Nigerians and foreigners; if a Nigerian can do that without getting arrested, then expect the same for a foreigner. All men are equal in the eyes of the law.

wins18:
Jay: I'm very confused.

Kay: What happened?

Jay: I stole meat from the pot.

Kay: Oh!

Jay: Now, I can't remember if the
soup spoon was inside or on top of
the pot!

Kay: ?!




click like if u find this not funny,
Share if funny

Always funny.

Opoki:
Does the name "Laketu" from OAU rings bell here? That was the last time I par took in anything struggle.

Rasheed

poiZon:
yesterdy i read n saw how people attacked, abused n accused pdp senators from ss n se but exempted senators from sw n also their reps members knowing fully well the project in question traverses more than 8states n terminates at lagos which will also benefit from it including ogun n ondo which mostly hv apc senators n reps.
I asked a zombie a question till now he cant answer, who heads the committee on appropriation in both chambers n list the others members n thier party affiliates then we can start argument.
Atlest pdp hv bin vindicated to some extent cos the punch just clarified that d budget was treated like husband handling his newly wed virgin spouse. Only the key men in that committee were privy to the details in the budget. U cant interfere in any committee u r not a member, hv never seen governors attain state executive council meetings.
So if apc want destroy pdp with propaganda, God is destroying them using their members.

The Lagos-Kano line passes through Lagos, Ogun, Oyo and Osun, so they can't really be bothered if we're to look at it from your perspective(I'm not supporting this perspective though). But, who do you think will benefit more from this project: the SW whose people don't travel much to the SE & SS or the SE & SS that has droves of people migrating to the SW. You'd be surprised at the number of non S/Westerners even in a remote SW state like Ekiti.

Daniel058:
Wonder they say never end , today (this morning) ) we killed this big snake very near our neighbour's house where they are clearing for this year farming..


I usually kill snake easily but this one really scared me.. WHAT!! ! 40 Snakelets in one snake, I thought snake lay eggs but this specie carries it young ones till they mature, and that's when they kill their mom, open it's belly and crawl away..


Chai! Again I SAY "WONDER SHALL NEVER END" "

That's a puff adder going by the markings on its body.

One of the most interesting facts about the puff adder is its apparent ability to produce live young. All reptiles produce eggs and whilst the puff adder does ‘give birth’ to living snakes, the process is deceptive. The eggs are in fact produced, but these eggs are carried within the mother during incubation and the young snakes hatch from the eggs before they emerge from her. This is known as ovi-vipipary and is fairly unusual within the animal kingdom. It is a wonderful means of avoiding predation of the eggs as many reptile eggs are sought out and eaten before the embryos ever have a chance to develop and hatch. This probably goes a long way in explaining the puff adder’s large distribution and success as a species. The young puff adders, as with all snakes, are capable of delivering venom from a bite right from birth and should not be taken lightly. In fact, one has to be more careful with young snakes as they are more likely to feel threatened and also have less control over the amount of venom released, leading to massive doses being injected!
http://www.sabisabi.com/wildfacts/puff-adder/

Ecoterrorist:
buhari is a tyrant and a dictator who is after anyone who criticise him. The goat has fled to US to do medicalcheck up under the guise of nuclear summit when Nigeria dont even have Uranium talk more of a nuclear plant.

buhari plans will fail because is a known failure and olodo

The Nigeria Uranium Mining Company (NUMCO) was a parastatal organization that controlled the exploration and mining of uranium in Nigeria and was a public/private partnership with Total Compagnie Minière of France, which owned 40% of the company. In 1989, Total pulled out of the partnership, and in 1993 the government reassigned NUMCO's responsibilities to the Nigerian Geological Survey. The NUMCO corporation was dissolved in 1996, and the government is in the process of liquidating its remaining assets.[8]

Recently, several important uranium deposits were discovered in Cross River State, Adamawa State, Taraba State, Plateau State, Bauchi State, and Kano State by the British Geological Survey.[9]

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mining_industry_of_Nigeria#Uranium

DrMeroThaEmperor:
Mystery solved.

Olusharp:
UNIZIK CEP Continuing
Education Programme

Not quite, CEP as used in the certificate is the acronym for an institution and not a course of study.

hucienda:
Why so sensational? 'cos this kinda reeks of desperation and lays credence to the marginalisation talk.

Publish the resumes of the other six appointed like Mr Obih here.

However, it's obvious from the announcement that 4 core northerners (none from the NC) and 1 each from the 3 southern zones were appointed. Aah.. the headache of governing a very ethnic-sensitive country as Nigeria. The delicate balance between North and South- the country is more politically inclined to the former than the latter though since 1960.

Isiaka Abdulrazaq is from Kwara State.

It's obvious that some people have been literally blinded by religion, how some people get the boldness to defend the indefensible will always be a mystery.

In that case, he'll spend just 109 days...

YourMrBoo:
Yoruba's stood which ground??
Meanwhile without the whole Southwest votes buhari will still win by just a few margins...
Your votes are inconsequential because it was highly splitted between PDP and APC.
So what the fuss about Yoruba kicking a sitting president? while is the north that should be credited.

Even the election was a political tussle between the north and the south but out of greeed, power thirst and a mere commissioner they decided to betray the south.

When Buhari fielded okadigbo way back. Igbos as always expected didn't sell out. One tends to wonder why betrayal without any benefit is always associated by a particular tribe.

During OBJs tenure, the Yorubas even betrayed him yet in OBJs amazement and bewilderment, the SS and SE stood by him and returned him back to seat, they didn't sell out



Excerpt from the story...


I think he has completed his jail term, lol but I am not surprised as the cowards will find a way to give reasons abandoning their own.
More watery beans for him....

Now take those votes you remove from Buhari and add them to Jonathan's, who do you think would have won?

Kelklein:
not up to 18...don't count rectangles

What you have there is more than 18

20

Brymo:
DAT chick is not others oh!
I tink she's Nicole Ari Parker, but I stand 2 b corrected.

You're right.

Alejhandro:
Kisses girl for dis thread. Glad to knw am not d only one observing it and its common among female OAPs. Most of them wit angelic voices are ugly. I once had a crush on one OAP back then. Mennnh! Dis lady's voice is out of dis world and I wont mention her name too cos some of u may knw her. Jokes apart, men called into her programs toasting and asking for her number on air. But d day I saw her, I was very disappointed. I felt like taking d voice from her because her face na insult to d voice.


It took me a while to actually accept she was the one.

Another one, my friend got a call from an unknown number and realized it was a wrong call. After d girl cut d call, dis my guy call d number back because of d girl's voice. Begin beg and toast d girl. Like play like play, relationship start. Free night call era, na so him begin talk wit d girl every night oo. We no go sleep. D day him travel go c d girl wit d plan of bleeping her. We sef come dey envy d guy. He left owerri for Benin around 3pm to come back d next day. Around 12 midnight na so we hear knock for door. Fear catch us until we come confirm say na him. He just entered and crashed on d bed. Guy wetin happen naa? We asked him... Well guess u all know his reply

Modified:

I've got a lot of mentions asking of wat he said... Well him no answer us dat night cos he
was upset and exhausted after d funny trip. It was in d morning he opened up saying dat d girl was extremely ugly and he cudnt
share a room wit her let alone...I will neva forget d words
he used- " d girl fit cause erectile dysfunction".
He was angry over d T fare he spent, d risk
he took travelling dat night and d disappointment.

Ke******ry?

Love Machine:
Many of us may have seen the iron fences that lagos state government is mounting between railway tracks.If i may ask,is that not another way of siphoning public fund?The ex governor fashola had used #2b to plant flowers.What did lagosians benefits from it.Nothing.Nigeria needs human development not irrelevant project where funds will be diverted into private pockets.

I had to go and dig up an old article because of this topic. I've gone through three pages of comments and all you kept saying is that people will vandalize the fence, whose fault is that if I may ask, the government that has decided to do something reasonable or the citizens that have no discipline?

Please read the news below and note that there's a law requiring that railways should be guided by a fence where the incident happened, it's common sense.

http://www.mprnews.org/story/2013/09/04/news/no-railway-fence-where-boys-feet-were-severed-despite-law

Vandalism should never be an excuse when it comes to safety.

I came across this video recently; it obviously shot by a mischievous fellow, but I just couldn't stop laughing.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QaAKi0NFkA

Now that's truly what you dont see everyday.

This topic should be moved to the joke section.

I was surprised when I heard the news this morning, so people still use that trick of hiding stolen money in soak away pits? Later Nigerians would start classifying them as being stinking rich, I suppose we now know where the stink comes from.

This thread is going to be a hit.

A white Chicago police officer who fatally shot a black 19-year-old college student and accidentally killed a neighbor has filed a lawsuit against the teenager’s estate, arguing the shooting left him traumatized.
The unusual lawsuit was filed Friday amid city leaders’ efforts to win back the public’s trust after several cases of alleged police misconduct.
Robert Rialmo’s lawsuit provides the officer’s first public account of how he says the Dec. 26 shooting happened. It says Rialmo opened fire after Quintonio LeGrier swung a bat at his head at close range.
LeGrier’s father, Antonio LeGrier, filed a wrongful death lawsuit saying his son wasn’t a threat. His attorney, Basileios Foutris, did not return messages seeking comment on the countersuit.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/chicago-shot-teen-sues-family-10-million-article-1.2523039

The sad part is that eye witnesses claim that the boy did not even swing a bat at the cop. Why the blacks are not having a national protest over this beats me.




https://www.facebook.com/TheYoungTurks/videos/10153410857319205/

grandstar:
coleon and others are supporting hubris.

I wanted to go into exportation but had to shelve it becsuse I will not sell my forex earnings at 197!

This policy is an amateurish. How will forex flow into the economy if the average exporter is unprepared to export because of this policy. Many foriegn investors will not bring their forex in because of this overvalued rate when the black market is 306.

And again, you are saying we should basically ban imoorts and make goods locally. This too is counterproductive.

When you brought your woman home, did your mother say," Great! He has brought home a woman. Come and marry her". I am sure not.

Your mom will ask, " Does she have good manners? Can she cook? Is she polite? Is she hardworking?

Likewise in manufacturing, it is not just about making every products? You have to ask questions? Does the country have comparative advantage in this product? Are we competitive in making it? Are we productive in manufacturing it? These are the time tested questions.

Countries don't grow rich by being a Jack of all trades. They prosper by focusing on areas they have comparative advantage. The petroleum sector has brought prosperity to Nigeria. Imagine if the country had 4 sections like that?

The truth as you are aware is that protectionism has failed to industrialise the country. Countries that have industrialised have accomplished that through exports.

To quote loosely from the video posted on the front page in which Pat Utomi advised Buhari to keep quiet: "we had an extended windfall (in the price of oil) for a long time- this was because of China and India and we refused to save". It is known to everyone in this country that the Forex reserves even came down instead of going up at times during this period, so who do we blame? In the past eight years apart from the first two years of Yar' Adua's tenure, our savings (Forex) has been nothing to write home about the current oil crisis is only serving as our deserved punishment. Buhari is only trying to salvage the situation and no matter how good a policy he will come up with, we'll have people who would be affected by that policy. The fact is that we have allowed ourselves to be dug into a pit by successive past administrations and given the situation at hand, a quick recovery is out of the question. It is better for us now to forget about instant participation in the global scene and develop ourselves first as we have nothing to compete with in the first place apart from oil. I will like to go on and develop my points, but I am very tired right now and hardly like typing lengthy responses.

P.S: Somebody stated earlier on this thread or the one created by Davide470 that those who are clamouring for devaluation are the BDC operators and those who earn Forex, your words (emboldened above) just confirmed that point.

I am presuming that you have a domiciliary account and that your forex will remain in dollars till you attempt to cash in so if that is the case, I am pretty certain that there are ways you can bypass selling your forex at 197 as stated above.

Now who told the hoodlums that he was the one who snitched on them?