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Culture / The History Of The Name Jegede by topup: 6:23am On Jan 07, 2011
Hello,

Does anyone have any information about the origin of the surname JEGEDE. I am researching to find where the people came from, I am aware that most Jegedes currently live in Yorubaland, Osun, Oyo states etc, but I am wondering if anyone knows any information about the oldest/ancient Jegedes, where they migrated from/to, what religions they initially had etc.

Thanks in advance.
Politics / Re: Are Nigerians Really Better Than Their Leaders by topup: 4:55am On Dec 28, 2010
Idehn said it all!!

It is a rare case that a rotten egg became rotten all by itself. My father has always said this; "give any Nigerian the chance to be the president, and they would do exactly the same thing". It's also our influences from our environment, the people on the inside, the people with the power are all corrupt, and even a good egg will catch something. . and of course become rotten.
Family / Re: I Am Tired Of My Marriage by topup: 4:51am On Dec 28, 2010
Oh this story really pulled at my heart. I am deeply sorry, you seem to be a very honest person, you've expressed your own faults and his (though you went into more detail with his).

I want to know where you went wrong, and if you are still not doing enough,  you might be doing all the 'wifely' things but are you doing things that will develop a strong relationship.

You remind me of a few wives I know, they bit their tongues, they tried to be perfect in their relaitonships, but that really wasn't them. You mentioned that he was never an emotional man or very talkative from the beginning, and that things have just declined since, and to be honest that is the trend that most marriages follow, especially once people get relaxed in their situation.

Before I continue I just want to state that I am not married, or in a relationship, so please take my words with a pinch of salt.

I know you feel like your marriage is lack-luster but I think there is a lot of good in it, it is probably by comparison that you feel this way, you imagine what your ideal marriage would be like and you compare it to your current state, imagine instead if everyone you ever knew, had husbands that beat them and disrespected them, and that were cold to them, you would be thrilled to have your silent man.


In my opinion I believe what is needed is an extremely serious conversation. Being casual and trying to bring the topic up subtly has not worked, so you need to make it known that you have been very quiet about an issue that has been worrying you for a very long time.

You need to discuss the fact that you don't think you are growing together, and everything else you've mentioned.

Yes, everyone is different, some are more emotionally open than others, but I think as humans we all feel the same, we just surpress and express in different amounts and types. I think your husbands quietness and emotionless demeanour is a learned behaviour, he probably doesn't know any better, how do you think you can approach this? Will he react to your honesty and sincerity, maybe a tearful and emotional conversation - or do you think standing your ground being firm, and blunt - straight to te point would be a more effective way of stating your point? Only you can decide this.

There is a great response from Moremi above ^

All the best.
Family / Parent - Child Dynamics by topup: 10:55pm On Dec 11, 2010
Hello there,

Well, my issue is that I am one of three children, the middle one, and I am currently residing in the family home, I feel that since compared to my mother who works a full-time job and late shifts, and my sister who works 8 - 5, that a lot of the brunt of the maintenance of the home has been dumped on my shoulder.

I know that this isn't a rare thing, and that Nigerian parents often give their children a lot of household responsibilities, but I feel that at the moment I am the only one carrying all of this. My younger brother is in university full-time and my older sister, is respected, and does not do any chores around the house, except the occassional once-weekly ones.

I am getting really exhausted, I don't feel I have a balance, you see to them they feel that I have plenty of time to myself, but this is only true to some extent. My sleep is always interrupted by waking up early to make my father breakfast and then a mid-lunch-mid-breakfast snack which is always something heaving like pounded yam, something that takes a while to cook. Then I often have to drive him around or buy things for him, and then I go to work, and then afterwards I might have some time to go to the gym or the supermarket before returning home for 6/8.

To them they will see the fact that I sleep sometimes 'til 12 in the afternoon (though I wake up several times to do the above chores), they see the fact I make time for the gym, and they see the fact that they wake up before me to go to work, and they think that I am lazy etc.

I am wondering if my parents are ignoring the obvious signs that one person can not cook for the whole family, have a part time job, clean the house, stay up for the people working late shifts all by themselves, or if I am just complaining over nothing.

I feel like a housegirl, I often get complaints about not picking the right meals to cook, I don't get thanked for doing the dishes, all that ever happens is that I get complaints when the house is tidy (no one else gets told about these things), I get told to keep the sink clear etc. It's straining my sleep and also making me feel really used.

*rant over*
Culture / Re: ARTWORK by Artist YINKA SHONIBARE MBE on display in TRAFALGAR SQUARE by topup: 3:09am On Dec 01, 2010
I think I like where it's going, I liked the ankara, running headless man - maybe mixed with a British Tudor male suit style,

2 Likes

Family / I Am Disappointed. by topup: 2:19am On Nov 24, 2010
I read this quote today:

"If friends disappoint you over and over, that's in large part your own fault. Once someone has shown a tendency to be self-centered, you need to recognize that and take care of yourself; people aren't going to change simply because you want them to. "
— Oprah Winfrey

Now, today a friend of mine disappointed me for the second time, for something I consider to be pretty major, of course we have both disappointed ourselves with minor things several times in the past - that's inevitable, but I wasn't prepared for this.

*edited out*
Romance / Re: Almost Raped By A Catholic Priest by topup: 1:37am On Nov 16, 2010
What if the next target is a prepuberscent girl or even a boy. I would advise you tell someone you trust, and then if you feel up to it, report him to the authorities, these things need to stop, we can't keep sweeping these under the rug, they send no signal to the culprit, but instead create an idea that men like that are invincible.
Fashion / Re: High Heels: How High Can You Go? by topup: 1:36am On Nov 16, 2010
bluespice:

top up u sure those are six inches? undecided

to walk around, dance n stuff in, 5 inches
to sit and 'flash my sexy shoes'  tongue anthing higher, havent tried over 6 1/2 though. . .


Well I thought they were, I think on a second thought maybe they are closer to 5.5 or 5 inches.

They really give me a new perspective LOL.
Because they are platform they are really comfortable, and I have never falled off them, only almost twice lol, it's a risk a girl like me is willing to take.

***Wait I've just checked the website I bought them from, yes they are indeed 6 inches.
Properties / Re: Any Architects In The House? by topup: 12:53am On Nov 16, 2010
joshua112:

thanks topup.i have a profile of the works i have done in hardcopy(a booklet).but concerning the e- prtfolio can u enlighten me on that.

For example, you may have an online version of your portfolio viewable via the internet. Maybe you've uploaded it on the various sites that host portfolios, or maybe you upload it on flickr, youtube etc.

So that you can send a link to the page of your works very easily to several people, instantly all around the world.

It is not a technical term, it's just a term I use to describe online portfolios, do you have one?
Properties / Re: Any Architects In The House? by topup: 3:17am On Nov 13, 2010
joshua112:

topup,
i really appreciate your effort towards speaking about this topic cos it has been an issue disturbing to me.presently i have decided to diversify into project management.Architecure as a course or profession is a night mere.while you are in school, you have lecture who want to victimize you so it will be hard for you to plan,when you graduate,then you have some top members of the NIGERIAN INSTITUTE OF ARCHITECTS(NIA) who wants to frustrate your effort of being a registered architect in nigeria because you graduated from a polytechnic etc.Well im a victim of this circumstance,i tried to get the NIA form and i was told it will take me 6yrs to become registered because i graduated from a polytechnic whereas a masters holder will just do it under a year.

As for me i have decided to combine my architecture with project managment so when i can't any archy job then i will do PM or rather go into full time construction.

Architecture as a career is quiet frustrating in nigeria because a client would rather spend thousands and millions buying materials (blocks,cement) etc for their housing project than rather paying an architect for doing their house designs for them.what clients dont know is that consulting an architect to do their house designs saves them alot of money and gives the engineer or builder ease while building the client's house.The most painful part of the issue is that most educate client allow themselves to be decieved by briclayers and artisans into believeing they dont need an architect that they can use their experience to design a building for the client since they have been building for the past 20yrs(i called them the baba Risika's).

Well i won't let the situations of things to hinder me from being an architect so i have been able to establish my own company(ARCHCRETE LIMITED) registered with C.A.C and i'm into construction,architecture,projectmanagement and interiors.
I also do 3 dimensional drawings.my number is 08023327879

So you have graduated and completed your degree and you can legally work as an architect, but are unable to obtain a membership to the NIA?

That is terribly unfortunate, and highlights the faults within the Nigerian system, don't get me wrong, Architecture is faulty in every country. I will say though that perseverence is key. I also believe you need to be able to network in such an environment and try your hardest to become acquainted with architects all around the world, possibly when you are able, you can make friends in other countries, and invite them or be invited to view their work (and vice versa). Networking is the bond between architects, there's really no other reason to do it, since the competition is fierce.

In a way I do understand your situation, people will always look down upon a polytechnic, especially if you are unable to show proof in the forms that they are used to of the quality of your education.

Have you established a large portfolio, have you an e-portfolio too? If so post the link on this page, if I find anything intersting I will ntofiy you, and if you wish I could post some things on my website.

The future of Nigeria NEEDS architects, I see faulty 'engineered' buildings everywhere. It takes more than maths to construct an amazing building.

I think Nigerians are still suffering when it comes to thinking into the future, we hoard 'materials' and create fortresses to protect our families, but there is something in our culture which can still be tapped into. And it is our need to be unique, to stand out, to show off, once you have been commissioned for a house (maybe a relatives), then I am sure you will get more customers and work.

If possible consider taking part in competitions, global ones, and find something authentic. I would also advise that when you are more stable to do research into the climate, and to encourage low energy and more efficient building. This combination along with a beautiful design will be more than enough to woo the Nigerian fellow.

I hope this helps. (Also if you wish you can send me a sample of a reply which you believe is; "The Nigerian house of the Future" the post can be found here : https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-532199.0.html#msg6942982
Properties / Re: Any Architects In The House? by topup: 2:23am On Nov 12, 2010
harpo:

pls house i have a 1st degree in archy and i just finishd serving how easy is it to get a job would i treated fairly like those with thier bsc in engineering or i will have to still go back and do my MASTERS part of the schooling, thankx

First of all where are you studying, secondly, I would advise that you open up your search to countries abroad, there is a lot of development occuring in Dubai and in Hong Kong, and they are currently facing the boom phase.

In terms of how you will be treated, that completely depends on where you are applying, how you present yourself, and did you mean you graduated with a first, or did you complete the first part of your degree. If you graduated with a first, congratulations, it shouldn't be too hard to get your foot in the door, and make contacts and network, join recruitment websites and get updates sent directly to your email alerting you to new jobs.

It all depends on how much you want a job, if you want to improve your prospects, why don't you do an internship, you may not get paid a lot but you'll accumulate a good CV which will speak of experience, and experience is the key to getting more jobs.

All the best.

Please check my other topic at: https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-532199.0.html#msg6942982 And let me know what you think, it would be much appreciated.
Romance / Re: Why I Pick On some guys! by topup: 3:52am On Oct 25, 2010
I understand your point, but just don't bother wasting your time with them, if you cannot be what they want, then let them move along or vice versa.

Culture / Re: What Is The Secret Of Nigerians Why They Are The Happiest Man On Earth?: by topup: 3:51am On Oct 25, 2010
I think deep down inside, the average Nigerian, living in Nigeria has given up on the hope of change. Accepting what is current, and making the most of a situation that you don't think will change is one of the best ways to really enjoy life.

You get anxious when you expect change, or believe you deserve change, but after so many years in the same situation and still managing to find little bits of joy in one's life, it's not so bad. . giving up your hope, just so you can actually exist and not suffer from depression.

In Nigeria, we don't place emphasis on psychological problems, there aren't children with diagnosed adhd, everything is approached as if it has a solution and yet somethings are immediately accepted as being out of one's control - like health for lower income people.
Sometimes you actually can enjoy life more when you surrender control . . but at the same time, it can make people lazy *ahem* *ahem*
Romance / Re: d by topup: 3:47am On Oct 25, 2010
Everyone lies, get over it already!!
Properties / Re: The Nigerian House Of The Future by topup: 3:50pm On Oct 23, 2010
Good point.
Properties / Re: The Nigerian House Of The Future by topup: 10:41pm On Oct 21, 2010
Thanks for the post info@lpf

Will also be posting this on the blog.

Your suggestions are very very practical and they refer to the situation at hand, do you think in the future, let's say the next 50 years, this is the ideal direction for the "Nigerian House".

I agree about the "less use of ground space" this way maybe crowding in the inner cities can be reduced by maximising height and freeing up land for infrastructure.

Nonetheless, nice suggestions.
Culture / Re: Ancient Igbos Built Pyramids! by topup: 1:53am On Oct 20, 2010
Interesting!!
TV/Movies / Re: Exclusive!:New Nigerian Kids Cartoon by topup: 4:41am On Oct 18, 2010
WOW, this is fantastic, I am always in support of anything to do with education and Nigerians being creative with media and advancing. I wish no less than the best for your animations, and hopefully they will make the tv.
Nairaland / General / Re: Enabling Personal Messages by topup: 4:31am On Oct 18, 2010
Seun doesn't want it.

People have asked, begged, requested, implied, pleaded, hinted, I'm going round in circles.

I don't think it's going to get enabled anytime really. I think NOT having a PM option is a form of censoring and moderation, I think Seun wants an 'innocent' name for Nairaland, and maybe having people talk about God knows what in their PM diverges from that.

Nonetheless, I've been itching for PM, but now I'm so sure it won't happen.

Guess, if you like PM, you could find it on another site maybe? undecided
Nairaland / General / Re: Why Are There No Personal Messages? by topup: 4:26am On Oct 18, 2010
She's right, they are no longer personal if they are being moderated.

If it's moderation that's the problem, then you can enable an option to only allow personal messages from members to which a person adds onto a list. I think this function is very important for any forum - I still cannot understand why such an advnanced website such as Nairaland does not enable its use.

Surely you must be tired of people asking for it?
Properties / Re: The Nigerian House Of The Future by topup: 4:23am On Oct 18, 2010
ocho cinco:

This is a great building, painfully restored only recently.

The style is very evocative of the colonial era.  Love it



Nice!!

First, is that the Ghanian house you mentioned before, secondly, you can see how the train tracks come so close to the house, it definitely has a history, but who will tell its story?
Properties / Re: The Nigerian House Of The Future by topup: 6:14pm On Oct 17, 2010
Any more entries?
Fashion / I Want To Buy Genuine Adire. by topup: 3:19am On Oct 17, 2010
Hello all,

I have read up on the history of Ankara, and am disappointed that once again, as Africans we cannot fully claim something that is ours, so instead I want to go back to Adire and Adire eleko and other traditional and authentic Nigerian and Nigerian-produced materials, specifically those made using tradition techniques, using casava starch paste etc.

Is there anyone who sells Adire and is willing to ship it internationally?

Thank you.
Properties / Re: The Nigerian House Of The Future by topup: 4:34pm On Oct 16, 2010
ocho cinco:

I always thought the Nigerian House of the future should borrow a lot more from the past. 

I am no architect, but I think it would be really cool to have a modern rendition of those muddy houses with the thatched roofs. They kept cool during the day and warm at night.

While that might not be practical, on some architectural show about buildings in Africa a while back, I saw the most remarkable building in Ghana. It was at once modern yet fit right into the spirit of the tropics. Shaded by a tropical tree, it was conventionally shaped (read: simple), and it gave the impression of space not the claustrophobia these Nigerian buildings induce. Like a large rectangle floating on a smaller square. Absolutely delightful

I wish I could get pictures. . .

Hello there and thank you for your response, I too wish you could provide some pictures to help myself and others visualize the concept of this "Ghanian house" and maybe we can learn from it.

As for the description, I agree, I believe the future of 'African' architecture lies in understanding the balance (which is ever becoming difficult to achieve) between the venacular and the modern (with modern being usually western styles).

Lastly, I would like to say congratulations for being the first person to have their writings mentioned on the Nigerian Architecture blog.

I always say, you don't need to be an Architect to engage yourself with architecture, it is something that we all have to relate with and so should all have a say in.

If you do find the sketches feel free to post them below.
Properties / The Nigerian House Of The Future by topup: 4:05am On Oct 15, 2010
Hello my fellow Nairalanders,

I know that many of you consistently update Nairaland with pictures and designs but are probably rarely ever seen beyond this board, I think they should be seen, and so I'm asking you to submit what you think the NIGERIAN HOUSE OF THE FUTURE should be/contain/look like either in a paragraph or a sketch.

There aren't really any rules however if possible please mention in a short paragraph the issues your house addresses, I just want to start a discussion about different ideas, and potentially show your (fully credited) work on the Nigerian Architecture blog.

What do you think?

Here is my entry:

The issues which my house will address include:

Space
Services
Maintenance
Tradition
Employment

(I will upload a sketch in due time),

The Nigerian house of the future is not hidden somewhere remote in the forest where there is space, but instead on the outskirts of the inner city, the house is serviced by both plastic absorbers which are installed on the roof to absorb the heat from sunlight which can be used to heat water that is released into the house's piping system using gravity.

Electricity is provided to the house by a district-by-district located basis, in which the district to which the house belongs to harvests solar radiation energy using a solar farm sufficient for the size of the district. As the size of the district increases, the size of the farm can also be increased. There is an initial cost which is very high, which will be supplemented by the government, but the renewable resource will pay for itself over time. Maintenance of these farms creates more jobs.

The design of the house will be true to the climate and hence true to the tradition. The tropical climate calls for materials which are high in their thermal mass values keeping the interior well insulated from the sun's heat, and radiating it out again into the night. The vernacular should be emphasised where possible, the re-introduction of the renewable grass roofing and patterned exteriors show a sense of identity, can be customized and renew local and traditional trade that has been neglected. Cooling of the house is done using small openings that allow little direct sunlight into the house will be utilized, and also courtyards will become a source of daylight without the cost of overheating the interior. Louvres and double roofing will feature in the design. If the topology is hilly, then preferably the house should be partially sunken into the hill.

The house is to initially start out as a bungalow which can then be built upon and extended to provide more accomodation. A collective communal effort is required in order to 'fuse' these houses together. Solitude is available within the individual houses, but a communal atmosphere runs throughout the spaces surrounding the houses.

Plenty of plants will be planted for natural shading around homes, areas where high activity during the day but low skill level of task can afford to have more shading my surrounding trees without conflicting with the need for plenty of light indoors e.g. living rooms, relaxation spaces.

(Sketches coming soon!!)
Fashion / Re: Bleaching Called "Lightening The Skin" by topup: 3:15am On Oct 14, 2010
jposuagwu:

Dear topup,

You must have been deceived by beauticians to believe there is a difference bw lightening and bleaching. This is like saying that there is no difference between verbal abuse and sexual abuse, yes they are both forms of abuse but their results are different. Anything that removes the skin pigmentation, no matter how slight is bleaching. You said lightening or toning does not wide the pores. I didn't say this. Its a lie, it really does erode the skin pores. And it is the CHEMICAL COMPONENTS in cosmetics that can even skintone. What am I saying? Am saying that it is only chemicals present in creams that can make the skin change in anyway. The chemicals could be hydroquinon, mercury, etc. What you call difference between lightening and bleaching is just a matter of percentage of chemicals present in the cosmetics in question. For example, a cream that has 0.75% hydroquinon content will sure not bleach or lighten the skin in the same degree as cream that has 1.5% hydroquinon content or 2.5% or 3% content but all the same it will gradually  or slowly bleach or what you call tone/lighten the skin over a longer period of time. Higher percentages of chemical content only bleaches faster and leaves patches. It does not mean that the slow toning cream  if prolonged in use will not ultimately bleach. Please note that bleaching and lightening or toning is just a matter of degree of chemical content and therefore a matter of semantics. Again know it that 90% of the creams or cosmetics that enter Nigeria have serious hydroquinon content but are hardly indicated on the body of the cosmetics. Out of the 90% that have serious chemical content, only 5% indicate the chemical content on the container of the cosmetics. Have you bothered to ask, how come very few creams or cosmetics say they contain hydroquinon yet many of our women are parading bleached skin. Anyone from the tropics, would only get darker as they grow up because of our weather. But how come most adult women from secondary school level all carry shinny skins (lightened bodies)? The thing that makes this possible is nothing other than bleaching chemical, if you like call it toning.  Please wake up and understand that only chemicals can change the colour of your skin no matter how small and they are dangerous. Not ALL chemicals are dangerous, there are some found in natural plants and materials, chemicals can also be natural, by the way I'm not endorsing bleaching or lightening, and probably the majority of your information is likely to be correct anyway since I haven't ever looked at this section of cosmetic products in Nigeria. At another post, I will highlight the consequences of bleaching in the medium  and long term.

 




Romance / Re: What Makes You Lose Interest During A Relationship? by topup: 3:01am On Oct 14, 2010
Distance, lack of ambition and a monotonous cycle.
Romance / Re: If Your Lover Loss Her Virginity 2 Another Guy,what Would U Do? by topup: 2:19am On Oct 14, 2010
First ask yourself, "are you a virgin", if no, shame on judging others by the measure which you could never fulfil.

If yes, then live and let learn, virginity does not guarantee One. Single. Thing.
Romance / Re: ss by topup: 2:17am On Oct 14, 2010
In response to "our black lady being cheap", you're black lady might be cheap but don't you dare go calling the rest of them cheap, I mean does that include your mother? Your sister? Your daughter?

Come off it, the pot has been calling the kettle black for much too long, you are just as CHEAP as these ladies you sleep with. Sleeping with someone is a two-way thing, you being the man have to put in some work - no?

Come off your delusion, you choose easy women to sleep with and make generalisations.

Open your eyes!!

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