₦airaland Forum

You still have it easier OP
At least you started with one, in our case we're learning on the job with 2 (six weeks old today).
To say I'm stressed is an understatement.
Don't even want to imagine how I'll survive these next few months living like this like I'm literally taking it day by day.

pocohantas:
Nawa o. Na by force?

There's a very high chance you'll be going for that first scan hoping they'll confirm it's a double gestation.
There's a spirit that takes over after that Pregnancy test turns out positive

NTAChannel5:
Hi, guys.

Please I need professional advice on which to go for. All praises to God, my wife is heavily pregnant with twins. From the last scan the babies are weighing 2.7kg and 2.4kg respectively. That's quite big for babies that are 7 months. And the expected period of delivery is between April ending and early May. Which means they may still grow bigger with time.

So I'm sincerely concerned about the safety of my wife and the babies, especially my wife coz her belly is so big that people are wondering why she hasn't put to bed yet. Although, she's very healthy and seems less bothered. But I'm not finding it easy here. I want to know if Cesarian Section is a better option for delivering the babies or should we have the natural one instead.

Please, doctors, health professionals and experienced mothers in the house, let me learn from you. Thanks

2.7 and 2.4kg at 7 month is quite big if you're sure about the figures. Those are normally weights you get closer to term.
Anyway it's always less confusing using weeks (than months) when it comes to gestational age. Makes for better appreciation of advancement.

About which is better (all things being equal)?
I wanted NB in my wife's case but had to follow medical advice & allow CS (earlier in the month when the leading baby turned out breech).
The overriding interest should be safety of mother and babies.

But it really is out of your hands 'technically'
If it's a primer like in my case I think you should prepare for CS as most medics involved in these situation these days generally don't like the stress of NB and the higher level of unpredictability that comes with it. It does feel they're looking for every reason these days to opt for CS. That it's a private hospital raises the probability of it being a CS even further

But in all things, the overriding objective is the safety of mother and babies so even if it ends in a CS it's not necessarily a bad thing, if anything, it's fractionally maybe the less volatile solution.
Congratulations in advance.

What were the diagnosis of your children's medical challenges?

The reality is that a successful marriage is dependent on pre marriage preparation and choices and post marriage choices and actions.
If you get both right & chose a fitting partner then marriage can be blissful. If not, then what you get you take.

Yes.
Inshallah

MrBrownJay1:
i blame EVERYBODY in this crazy story....i just dragged the baby mama into it, as everyone is talking about the possible baby daddy and not baby mama. the fact that so many people on this thread are more concerned about her marriage being scattered than knowing who the bioligical father truly is, is what is amazing here. some people out there really have MISPLACED PRIORITIES in their lives!

No misplaced priority chief.
OP's story is lacking a great deal of credibility with his switching around dates.
You had a lot of time planning a post yet mess up the most important aspect of the post, The dates. How can you post February and then switch it to March only after you have been called out to the impossibility of your claims?
The child is obviously with his rightful and biological father now.

T0T0fucker:
I made mistake it was March ending

Naso
E go soon enter May

GboyegaD:
If he's last dealing with her was in February, there's actually no chance the baby is his except if he isn't sure when their last dealing was. It is apparent he's jealous the lady moved on.

He isn't doing what is right for the child in this case and we both know it. He's just trying to flex muscles and apparently caught feelings for the lady but isn't willing to admit it.

Correct.
The lady probably took in between middle of March and early early April if she put to bed 2 days ago.

Okay.

Well, you just have to be yourself, be courteous, calm yet confident.
If your girlfriend has done her job with her parents (mom especially) and she has her parent's respect they will extend that respect to you.
Dressing needn't be too serious. Something you're comfortable in but not too elaborate.
Gifts? Depend on your girlfriend's guidance here but don't spend too much here. Maybe just fruit on the way is fine.

MejiLoyon:
This one all your family problem I don know already. I know your sister in-law stays with you. I know your wife's job. I know you suspect your wife,I know your wife stays out late. I even know your sister peeps when you're nacking. Wetin remain na the color of your wife pant.

I'm waiting to read where you will drive her out. Or when she cheats. For one day you will slip. And real men will track her and nack sense into her. Continue being a baby by bringing every issue to the world

I just tire jare.
No privacy, no decorum, no sanctity in marriage again.
Every breath taken must be shared with strangers on social media �

Have you ever paid heed to how much the world really care?

You are important, irreplaceable, a diamond, we certainly can't do without you bla bla bla; my brother/sister, no think am because in reality only a select few out of your immediate family, spouse(s), friends will truly have disruptions in their normal activities if you're suddenly unavailable.

I have been noticing how short-lived it all is but maybe it really dawn on me a few weeks back when a colleague of mine (a departmental head in a different unit in my workplace) suddenly died in a ghastly road traffic accident on his way home from work. I was broken and felt ill all through the night, it's safe to say i expected major work disruptions at least in his unit and a significant reaction from the organization the next day.

Suffice to say, i couldn't be more disappointed. Beside some gloomy faces and a few show of emotions by people just getting the news that morning, people basically moved on with their lives and there wasn't even a delay in service delivery in his department let alone the whole organization.

Did i mention that it being an islamic burial, that my workplace didn't even officially have a representative at his burial? Yeah they didn't as it took place around 8 am in the morning before such arrangements were concluded.

Have you ever been surprised with how quickly people have moved on after the demise of their spouses, relatives, colleagues etc?
Share your thoughts.

Man's inhumanity to man.
Karma will deliver a due recompense.

You made your pledge with the information she gave you which subsequently has been shown to be false. You're not to hold yourself to a promise made on some misrepresentation of facts fed you.

Loyalty is king but it's also not the correct choice in every situation. Every situation has it's own peculiarities.

Choose loyalty and fairness.
Whoever love you would respect your relationships.

Iamafinegirl:
If you repeat one three times na, it’s d used ones present at the end of the week wen I am washing Dt are dirty I pack now with your vests. Na me say make u no wear d 20 at once in a week.
Are u really going to lie on this too
From you don’t wash it....
have you washed it more than three times.
Na so you go d bring out the truth small small
That’s one thing I am glad about u
U dey always release d truth without knowing small small.
We were fighting here oo the day you said thank u and it shocked you that despite the fight I still went ahead to do what I use to do. Because me I am not trained with keeping malice with family members. I have never seen my dad and mum keep malice or because they are fighting not do what they are to do for their spouse in 31 years of marriage.
You were surprised I did it in a fight and you said thank you

My dear, people may be willing you on & singing sweet nonsense to your ear but at the end they mostly don't even care. It's probably all entertainment to them.

Stop stoking the fire. If you win the war of words & post all his shortcomings here to the cheering of your fans then what next?

Give it a rest now. Even if you don't intend to continue the relationship, must you burn every bridge on your way out?

I'm still wondering what your two are looking to gain continuing this exchange on nairaland. Like if you too can still exchange texts, why not do privately?

bwambasolomon:
I have never had any side chick because my system is naturally not wired for that. And I don't give money to any side chick, so if you like lie on me, it is your style to do that.
This girl has a natural mindset to always disagree with anything anyone says.
When I said I wasn't going to eat the stew because of the ulcer at that time, I knew you were about to argue, that's why I squeezed my face. So the right thing to do because I squeezed my face was to say it's not your business that I have ulcer.
It is so bad to the point that anything you say must be argued about.
A typical example is when we were talking about the distance between one state and the other. Audience help me look at this thing oo. if you want to calculate time it takes to cover a distance between one state to another, do you calculate from the time you leave that state to the time you get to the other state, or you calculate from the time you leave your house in one state to the time you get to your house in the other state?
I believe every body knows that you calculate from the time you leave one state to the time you reach the other state.
A random person can just ask you, how long from Kogi to Ondo, will you start describing where your house is in ondo or you will just tell the person the time it takes from kogi to Ondo and not time it takes to your house in Ondo. Unnecessary arguments that is void of logic and reasoning.
If one says good morning and every one can clearly see that it is morning, this girl can say it is night and will keep arguing about it. If you tell her not to say it is night, she will say you don't want her to air her opinion.
You say I don't manage my finances, after you keep your own and I use my own to maintain the house, and you don't consider that because all you want to believe is that I don't manage my finances.
Go and buy all the things I have in both of my houses then check your expenditure and see how much it costs.

Bros bringing relationship issues to Nairaland is one thing I wouldn't have advised because the truth is an average working class man is already a better counsel to himself than 80% of the opinions you would get here which would be dominated by teenagers & worse-off responders.

Your situation with your woman wasn't ideal but it was manageable before you brought it here but as expected it has since escalated as does most relationship issues that find it's way to this platform.

It's not my place to advise you to fight for your relationship but at least be smart enough to not continue to dance naked to the glee of thrill seekers here. You decide it's over; fine, but don't go burning bridges irreplaceably or tainting memories if not for yourself alone but also for the relationship built between families.

Frankly your lady doesn't appear a bad person to me but maybe there's a personality mismatch between you two. Don't know if the age gap is too small or it just the upbringings and/or exposures but the two of you just haven't seemed to mix. She for one hasn't seemed to show she's willing to submit to you &/or have you have the last word and you yourself have been petty enough to be competing to.

It's unfortunate as it wouldn't have cost you guys much to just make adjustments to make things work but apparently that's not a priority for una.
Sad but at least you guys can part as amicably as possible.

If humans were God, it would have been a very insane world.

A habit? Yes.
An addiction? Yes.
Genetic? Surely not.

sirjamesjnr:
I don't seem to agree with you. A woman can have a failed career, fail in an academic field but will still walk into a warm and loving man. Who wants to relate with a man with a nickname called a loser? Not even his friends. Class value is pronounced in a man's world.

There's always going to be a value that woman with a failed career and academics is offering else the loving man won't touch her with a long pole. You err when you rate value only in terms of finance or qualifications.

It's actually not a men's only situation, it's a life fact. You're only as important as the value you provide.

Wahala for who share flat with 2 frenemies.

Met two months ago.
Already pregnant maybe by up to a month.
Friend already feeling she's entitled to become a wife, some yen yen yen about love.
Na waoh! How people are able to lose themselves this quickly these days is beyond me.

4. Grow up and understand there are more serious issues in the world.

5. Appreciate the little grace and companionship of a spouse.

6. Learn that life is short and not even that serious.

ETC...

Okogiemikejr:
So physically and emotional unavailability is now a reason to share your naked video as a married woman.Hmm Nigerians sha

That's how you understood the post you quoted?

Your wife no try at all.
It's obvious you haven't been as physically and emotionally available as you should be but still that's scantily enough reason for her betrayal. Even worse is her ease at sending nudes from her matrimonial home.
Forgive? That's your decision to make but this shouldn't be before finding & addressing the root cause of her betrayal.
There needs to be some kind of reason to feel it would not happen again before forgiving.
For you, be a man and get your shits together, stop mouthing your wife off to single girls. That in itself is a form of cheating.

Funny OP
In a pandemic where going cheap even have a good alibi you decide to do a big wedding you can't even fund half of. Like, who does that?
Anyway, your best bet is your colleagues at work or your close friends, that is if you still think it necessary to continue to be foolish.

Half story, always very different from the full story.

Great tale, just the moonlight and it's perfect.

SouthNigerian:
Dig the Earth with your bear hands.

'Bear Hands' - Nice group
You must like rock �