₦airaland Forum

Kobojunkie:
See this numbskull! Get away!

Kobojunkie:
See this numbskull! Get away!

Kobojunkie:
Get away....as if Nigerian men have ever been known as some of the most sincere humans on the planet.

You never met her yet you already condemning her character as if the one you continue to showcase here proves you any better than those you love to chew. Nonsense!

Tetrisbiz:
I never wanted to do this and this is a very embarrassing situation but I need help from nairaland users.

I have an older brother in his early 40s. Since I was a child till this very moment, this person has been a torn on the flesh of my parents and the family in general.

Sometime in 2020, with the help of my elder sister's husband ( the HR) we were able to find a job for him as a supervisor in a factory and then I and my immediate elder brother (another sibling of mine) contributed money and rented an apartment for him in Lagos and then bought some property to furnish the apartment. To our surprise, my elder brother starting forcing his sexual advances on junior female workers and if any of these girls reject his advances he would start threatening the girls that he would get them fired with the help of the HR (My sister's husband). Forunately my sister's husband found out what was going on and rejected my brother's request for the female workers to be sacked. This started a war between my elder brother and my sister and her husband.

My elder brother eventually left that company (note he wasn't fired he LEFT by himself) and went back to the village. When my father heard this he almost collapsed as he knew the trouble that was coming his way.

Since he returned to the village he started assaulting my parents and I had to send money (about 400,000) back to Nigeria for him to rent a flat just so he could leave my parents alone. My brother stayed in that apartment for 3 months then started fighting his landlord and then told his landlord he couldn't stay for the year and demanded some part of his rent back,he took his rent, returned to the village and picked up from where he left by fighting my father ( a very old man). Its so bad that my father sometimes leaves the house (The house that he built as a family house) and stays outside for hours before returning home.

Please do we have restraining order laws in Nigeria and is there a particular police division in the Nigerian police or legal system that can be used to address an issue such as this?

I'm tired and I'm considering taking a drastic and extremely aggressive decision to resolve this situation once and for all.

Ezmans:
see invaders claiming indegene of lagos

zoedew:
Gov. Soludo is actually doing a lot in Anambra to reform the State. Silently.

ValarDoharis:
I said it that the westerners hailing Soludo will remember that he is Igbo if he chooses to run for president! Only his daughter's comment, una don dey insult am

Ezmans:
tell me your state let's compare it with Anambra both in education, finance, industry, good governance

Acidosis:
If the female gender likes and appreciates my posts, then that means I am posting things that matter to them. Why are you resisting happiness? You don't want to keep your wife happy and sane?

I am not making excuses for his wife. I have only given him tips for his own sanity. In life, you have to always make choices. Some will help you, others *may* destroy you.

TenQ:
I actually don't want to meddle in the affairs of this man and the mother. Events may determine the options available for them. They may be living in different states and the wife prefer to stay resident where she used to live.

No one will complain if a Nigerian man about to wed his girlfriend living in Texas, USA decides to leave Nigeria and live in her house after marriage in America.


However, the important thing is not being emotional about things especially with respect to the document of the house. They should ask their mum to give them in trust.

If this is done,
1. Their mother can marry in peace the man of her dreams
2. The children know that their father's properties are insured in their names.


I find it strange when educated guys are looking forward to inheritance from their father instead of seeing how to build their own wealth

ADURA123:
Good evening fellow NL members,
My story may be long but pls endeavor to read to the end so that you can make proper suggestions or advice.

I have been married for more than 10yrs now with beautiful kids, my marriage is one that many Young guy will wish to have, but along the the line I don't know what happened things begin to nose dive. In the last 6yrs I discovered that I struggle to make love to my wife, she will either tell you ohh, she is tire or she don't like sex much..this I have endured for all this years with no cheating.
Her qualities are
She can cook
She can keep the house clean
She can manage resources
And she is accommodating to my people
In all this years I have never cheated on her, proudly saying it coz my dad warned me of cheating on my wife rather I should divorce her and go for another wife.

My qualities are
I work and earn like about 700k net a month.
I give feeding allowance and personal total of 100k a month while I invest the rest on a project which she is aware of.
I don't drink or smoke
I don't keep late night
and I am the best friend to her and my kids.
Honestly having talk to her for over 5yrs on this issues of love making and she refused to change, then I have decided to yield to my dad advice and ask her to leave...she is not aware of this plan, but trust me it will hit her.
I allow her to do little job to have her own finance is not as if she contribute anything in the house, but she is claiming stubborn, I love her so much, it will hurt me to cheat on her, something I have not done since I got married to her.
I plan moving to a new place in February, and she doesn't fit into my plans.

My decision between now and December is
1 Avoid asking her for lobe making
2 Continue taking care of her so she won't suspect anything
3 when she comes close I avoid her.
4 February I issues divorce papers and give her like 1m to go get her life back

Is there anything more I can do for her?
Advice me pls...

TenQ:
I didn't speak of the Husband to be. I spoke only of the mother and son. It his the man's business if he wants to pack into his wives house. I am not privy to why the man and his mother agreed to that.

But the young man should act with wisdom: convince the mum to give the document of the house to the children in trust. This takes care of any eventual problem in the future.

TenQ:
Why have you behaved so immaturely?

1. Your mother owns the house since your father is dead.
2. Since your father hasn't willed the house and property to you, go build your own fortune
3. Your mum has the right to remarry anyone she chooses and bring the man into her house and set her up in her own house.
4. You could however speak to your mum in a Civil and respectful manner while requesting for the document of the house or for the document to be given in trust to your siblings
a. This is also for her protection in case the new husband decides to sell the property behind her back
b. She would guarantee that her own biological children will inherit her properties if things go south.

But let your mama breathe o!
The house belongs to her 100% as your father is dead!
Unless your mum gives you the house, it isn't yours!

Your mum deserves the right to be happy and to remarry if she chooses

LewisHamilton15:
Last week I proposed to my long time girlfriend and fiancee and she accepted me.

We discussed a whole range of topics and we are convenienced that we can live our lives together. But one thing we disagree on is the issue of house: she said we must build a house together before settling down but I suggested we tie the knot and live in a rented apartment before planning to build our personal house but she insisted we must build.

She said we will contribute money to build together, she won't leave me alone in the project. She even suggested withdrawing her savings of #250, 000 so we can buy land. I have the money and apart from my daily hustle I have other side businesses that springs me money occasionally.

I want to settle down as soon as possible but she cited the problems that comes along with living in a rented apartment. I really wish to settle down but this lady won't agree.

I don't want to cause problem between us so how do I go about convincing her?