₦airaland Forum

I see some Igbo men here are pained by this judgement

The thought of sharing their fathers property with their sisters is a horrible thought to some of them lol.

As for me tho, I believe both my sisters and I have rights to my father's property, and my father understands that, to God be the glory.

Abi dem say culture is dynamic and not static

MalcoImX:
Trust is really an issue. I cannot vote a Kanu or Uwazuruike who I perceive as being hostile to my being. For the Igbo I'll vote for are those who've build a bridge across to other peoples and regions. But think about it, those ones are derided by the Igbo, and abused as a sellout. Rochas Okorocha, for example, is being called Okoroawusa for being able to relate with other Nigerians. A good virtue is turned into a joking matter. You then tell, who should I vote for?

I myself will NEVER vote any of those people you listed up there

Okay then

MalcoImX:
You asking me why the trust when an Igbo did a coup and killed all the top northerners and spare his own Igbo brothers.

That was 50 years ago.
Besides, there was a counter coup, and a pogrom in the north where my people died.
Should that one count too

Listen, for this country to move forward, let us try to put what happened behind us and forge ahead.

If as a citizen of a country you cannot run for office of president with a fair chance of winning, where you may be "Not voted" because of your ethnicity, then there is no point being part of that country.


So tell me, can you in your heart of hearts vote for a competent Igbo man as president, or you will not vote him because of he is Igbo?

That question should be answered honestly by all Nigerians

enshi:
Our forefathers never took any pre wedding pics yet their marriages lasted till death.... Now we get married only to take pre wedding pics and go our separate ways...

But how can this guy come and go and carry wetin big pass am..... I see him cheating next week... The lady should make very sure that her house maid is fatter bigger darker shorter than her else...... Hmmmm

You think every one reasons like you

MalcoImX:
People may not like to hear this, but there's a trust issue with the Igbos. The Hausa and the Yoruba don't seem to trust them. Why is that, and how can that be resolved? You may not believe it, as a northerner when given the choice, I am more likely to go with the Yoruba than the Igbo, and most likely the Yoruba too will prefer a northerner to an easterner. As long as this logjam is not resolved the unity of Nigeria, and especially the position of the Igbo (politically) will always be at risk.

So, tell me, why the trust issues

chebeoc:
I have come to understand that because how the western media bash nigeria other african countries are looking down on nigeria because of that, the west bash any country they can't pocket. look at China, Iran, North korea and Nigeria , if they don't have power over you you're bad and they say many evil about you. some even put it that nigerians are disgracing other africans nationals then i want to know if it's nigeria that cause American police to be killing blacks or whites to treat blacks like flirt in s.africa before. look we're blacks and the sooner we realized that the white people hate us the better for us to work together and appreciate ourselves and stop comparing and blaming every minute.

??

genieluv:
APC was speaking. Is that not the same way Rochas and Amaechi speaks in favour of the core-north because of APC bond?
2011 GEJ election proved that the middlebelt and the south can actually unite and put the core-north where they belong, where were you in 2011 when 7 states of the middlebelt/northern minorities voted GEJ instead of Buhari? Not even the south-south or south-east could deliver 7 states to GEJ in 2011 election, but the northern minorities did it. So speak from experience.

The entire south voted Jonathan.
The only rogue state was Osun state.

focus7:
op, nothing can make Peter Obi be the president of Nigeria, so stop hyping yourself.

Or do you think the Igbos alone can garner enough votes that will make him a president with 5% votes from the SE?

What is this one saying now?

where is 5% coming from?

Harzontorh:
On dit quoi mon frere. J'étais au mali et burkina. mais je suis allé la bas pour le vacances seulement.

moi même ca me rend très heureux que toi aussi tu connais chez nous a babi.

Tu est ou actuellement?

Comment ça va Mon frère.

ça fait un peu lomgtemps....

sweetcocoa:
That's not the topic here, except you are saying this 'advantage' automatically makes every(for emphasis) Nigerian MILs prejudiced against their DILs.

You still don't get my point.
Worldwide, women find it difficult to get along with each other, and there are often frequent disagreements between many MILs and their DILs.
I was just bringing in a dimension into this discourse, the extent this disagreements can degenerate to, as opposed to other climes.

martineverest:
abeg, whites makes the best of husbands...black men top the best of cheats

You say

AreaFada2:
Have you had one before?

What you can say is that people are generally more independent and family units are not quite as close-knit. If a guy finished uni at age 21 and moves away to work 500km metres away and marries at the age of 35, he would have been independent from age 18 if he was on campus or from 21 if at home during uni. So parents might generally be less influential. But the idea of being more liberal becomes a fallacy when you have actually being in it. I just gave you an example.

I once dated another girl who was very nice. We went on holidays together and all that. Her mum knew my name and knew her daughter holidayed with me sometimes. But her daughter never told her I was a black man. Her daughter said no point telling as she hated the idea of any black person coming into her family.

Me too nor care. I had no plans to marry her. Later on when she sometimes talked about marriage, I had my ready excuse : her mum.
Marriage is hard enough when both families are in support let alone one side is against it ab initio.

Sure many blacks marry white ladies but all is not as sweet as it looks. I have been to several weddings between black friends and white ladies where the white family flatly boycotted the wedding.

Who nor go nor know.

Yea, that's true....
But not all white people are closet racist tho.
Just pray not to marry one.
There are good ones and bad ones

sweetcocoa:
I beg to differ.

It is more about being emotionally healthy than visiting one another, than what you term individualistic society, the US is a very individualistic society, yet this issue plays there and so is New Zealand, Australia and a bunch of other countries but MILs and DILs disagree there.

Yea
you have made good points, but I still stand on my opinion.
You cannot tell me with all authority that this problem is as rampant in these countries than in SSA and SEA, the cultural issue makes the DIL be at a disadvantage position in these regions

Okay look at it from this angle...

A MIL is more likely to instigate the family to push out the DIL to the streets in Africa, as opposed to Europe/America.
I have seen this with my eyes

A MIL is more likely to be a live in person in Africa than in the other clime

A MIL is more likely to suggest, and Even bring a second wife to the matrimonial home than in the other clime.

To cut the long story short, the MIL has more advantage here than in other climes.
She could be more brazen in her attempt to frustrate the DIL here than elsewhere


I hope you see my point?

patriotic9jaboy:
Ilorin was sold to the fulani's by afonja just like Russia sold Alaska to USA back then. The fulanis did not take over kwara like u claimed. The yoruba Kingdoms was the most powerful back then before the British came. The Warriors of dan-fodio could not conquer the south west after having the south east and middle belt in the bags. Oduduwa throne is very powerful

Who told you Usman Danfodio conquered the SE?
Whom is your history teacher?

raumdeuter:
For you to think this is a Nigerian problem you must be either naive or unexposed

It is more of an African /SEA countries problem than say Europe/America IMO because The former are more particular about extended family stuff than say in Europe, where family members are more individualistic/mind their business.

This is my observation tho, because my cousins in Germany hardly get involved in each other's lives, and their mother is living with their dad (my uncle) in the countryside most of the time, and is not inclined to visit all the time, as opposed to Naija MIL that will always find opportunity to visit/breeze in/get involved in the son's life.

The more individualistic a society is, the less likely in laws (Not just mil) get involved/cause friction in the family.
hope you understand my point? ?

Let me drop my opinion on this topic...
I have seen things like these across NairaLand about childbirth and stuff, and this is what I have to say.

FIRST, pregnancy/childbirth is a very wonderful thing, a miracle of creating new life, and thus to me is sacred, and should not be underestimated in anyway.


Women (just like men too, but this one is about women)
should be appreciated and taken care of tho, during and after this period, as this would go a long way in making the journey easier.

However, the idea I don't buy is when some women try to use this to blackmail men, with statements such as "it's your fault" etc. We men don't need to be "blackmailed" to appreciate the role you play in our lives in this regard, and take care of you accordingly.

But that said, thumbs up to all GOOD MOTHERS out there (Not all those ones that will still throw their babies away after giving birth in the dustbin/canal/pit latrine)

God bless you all.

Amberon:
The AAs started coming back before Ghana did opened its borders to them.

Also, poverty and hardship is another factor. It may interest you to know that status show that the average black american has less than $1000 in savings. That is a fact. Most AAs are poor and don't go to school. They only do menial jobs and live paycheck to paycheck.

Statistics show that there are more black men in prisons in US than there in Colleges and universities. I've read many epistles by them and they feel Africa would be a lot cheaper for them.

But of course you're right, most of them would rather stay back cuz anywhere is better than Africa.

In many cases, the black people are the architects of their predicaments

Weakening the family structure, as well as the lack of direction for many of them is the reason why they are broke.
What does it take to finish at least high school??
there are community colleges, and other opportunities, so what the hell is their problem?

Amberon:
Pls learn to be civil. If you don't like certain comments you can skip other than annoy people.

There are several AAs returning to Africa. They happen to prefer Ghana. A quick search on YouTube would have been expository. Several AAs are now taking ancestry tests to know their actual origin and tribe. Before you go speaking out of ignorance there is something called "research".

You're welcome.

Okay.
Those AA who are migrating to Africa are a paltry percentage, compared to the millions here willing to run out at the slightest opportunity.
That is my point.
I have AA cousins aplenty, so I know what I am saying when I say MOST AA will NEVER want to move back here.
Just saying though

Let me ask you, if slave ships dock across west African ports, millions will run into the ship to leave.

P.S.
I know why some AA move to gh, they have this black ancestry visa stuff (something like that) and that is what makes it easier for some of them.
Too bad Nigeria don't hAve it

Amberon:
There is a back to Africa movement currently going on now. So many AAs are now retracing their steps back to Africa.

Make una dey deceive unaself.

Lol.
.
So many AAs returning my foot.
When many professionals across Africa are plotting to leave this shithole called Africa, you are talking about AAs returning; D

Just go on the streets and other circles and see for yourself

IcePriNze:
[color=#006600][/color]Please who had traveled to Ghana from lagos recently by road i'm planning to travel few days from now, i need to know the fastest transport company and how much there are charging. Btw i don't have any passport too

Young Shall Grow is your best bet.
Use a valid ID If you don't have passport.
Safe journey

All these story you guys are typing will not stop Nigerians from troopimg to the American embassy in their thousands to hustle visa...


That I am sure of.
Many youths are moving out of the country in droves.

ngcars:
My experience is that naira is not smiling at the moment. I paid through my nose for my apartment because of poor value of naira. Like ugosample earlier said "come prepared" if you must come. Hotel is expensive, renting an apartment in some areas is. Heard some areas are cheap though.

I'm happy you are settling down without much hassle.
In three months time, you would be able to communicate in basic French, like buying things and stuffs like that....

I asked you a question previously, but didn't get a response from you.

About the exchange rate the banks are charging you on your card.
pls respond to that, thanks

what rubbish is going on here
This is the picture of the three men who founded independent Nigeria.....
Yet some dimwits are fighting for ethnic supremacy here?
Does ethnic supremacy put food on the table?

This is not bad tho.

Let us not forget something.

There is an allegation that she lied about her age.
If indeed that is true, then that is a Breach of trust, and a marriage should not be built on lies/deceit.

That said, you both have to work this out.
Divorce is the lazy way out.

VomeSchakleton:
Yess! Call it hypocrisy or whatever you want. But doing sinful acts behind peoples back and doing it openly are two different things. The latter we will never condone. We will never make immorality the norm or acceptable in our society, the day that happens then we've forgotten our values. Just because you plonkers in the south have accepted it doesn't mean we have to. They say we hiddenly do worse but so do they. But for instance will they allow explicit sex in nollywood? Do they not have sex? Why don't they show that? That too is hypocrisy yeah? They funny thing is they think that's a sin when they commit things in their movies against their Christian faith. She is free to join nollywood if she wants to. But you nitwits should learn to respect our values, just because you've lost yours doesn't mean we should use ours.

I have to say hearing this come from a muslim? I am utterly disappointed.

Fellow Nigerian

I respect your views, but I am from the South.

Listen, in this world, it is impossible for everyone to see things the same way, because we are all different, both in tribes and religion.

That said, don't you think we should respect each other's views as human beings?
Those Hausa movies have a target audience, and if they find such things distasteful, they have the right to censor and regulate what they want to, there is no problem with that.

But threatening to kill her The suspension is enough punishment.

And for you to say that we down south have lost our values is very insulting, please don't say it again.

We don't see things the same way and that is fine, because we are different, so let us live in peace, and not be violent.

Good night

I don't get why alcohol should be banned in a state in this country tho.
Not all Nigerians are Muslim, and if a Christian lives in the north and want to drink, why should that be a problem?

If you as a Muslim don't want to drink, that is fine, but don't force others into making that choice too...

But what do I know?
Those guys are still stuck in the 18th century.

Good job bro. I expect more updates really, because this is interesting

I will definitely follow this thread...

IMHO, I think part of that 600k should be put into teaching yourself a valuable skill/Investing in yourself so that you can be more productive, but hey, it's just my opinion

Nonso92:
I did most of the club from pk10 down to ganhito, a lol bit flexing inside Casper at sacre Coeur, you know yannicks, sky club, club Q, 7 have forgotten some names of those clubs inside town.

And these activities did not drain your pocket....
You try.

Nonso92:
Aya, ..
No I don't know it.. I partied in a few clubs there, just few.. gendermerie/police harassment for night, that thing dey vex me ehn!

Which ones did you like?