₦airaland Forum

Mccullum:
Only Africans traveling abroad for settlement without availability of jobs waiting for them.

Very rare seeing other races for such decision except for tourism.

Africans aren't poor but very poor mentally.

It's not poor mentality.
It is the nature of our countries.
Right here on Nairaland, you can see how different tribes hate each other.
It didn't start today.
Igbo, Yoruba, Hausa...etc are all separate kingdoms. They were minding their business before colonisation.
Now British FORCED everybody to form one country.. and you automatically expect them to work together and cooperate?
Most African nations were formed like this, by force.
Forcing different tribe villagers to form a Nation.

Rwanda's case was so bad that the people killed each other into the millions.
Now they are all dead, the orphaned BABIES that were left alive in the battle field of dead bodies are about 25-30 years old today 2023.
They have no uncles, or relatives to pass on any Hutu or Tutsi village tribe tradition. So they're just speaking English and cooperating with each other. They don't know anything about the war and don't even know their tribe. Nobody alive to tell them their tribe.

I fear that is the only way Nigeria will ever move forward,
After all the elders, villages and chiefs have been killed in a bloody battle with all the tribalism along with it.
NO connection with babies.
The new babies will grow up without knowing anything about village or tribe.
Then they will just work together like Europeans and make the country grow.

nairamaniac:
You have to re-swear at points of crucial times.

Also make the verbiage of the swear more specific.


Which one is "in good times, in bad times, for better, for worse...."??


Can you compare that to "Make thunder strike my p*ssy, if another man rod enter inside". ?

Well, anyhow people decide to wed, they always take an oath before witnesses.
The person that will not fear or respect God will not fear your juju oath either.
Marriage is about trust and not about imprisonment.
If you people don't trust each other, what then are you gaining in the marriage?
Your marriage is already ended. Kukuma leave this marriage and go and find the person that will trust you.
You can't force anybody to trust you.

grandstar:
The girl deserves what she got. It is best never to collect cash from a guy.

It would have been best they first meet at a cheap eatery like KFC or Domino's to know each other.

You can even test her with Chicken Republic or Amala Hey . Tell her you don't have much

Don't meet in house.
Don't meet in restaurant.
Meet in another neutral place and know each other there.

nairamaniac:
First take your wife to shrine to swear and also place magun on her.

But if she's ugly and maybe Fat, you can rest your mind.

If you have to be swearing with your wife at this time, long after your wedding day, then your marriage is already over.
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All the swearing was done ON the wedding day.
In good times, in bad times, for better, for worse....
That's your marriage vow.
You swore that swear before God and man.

adesegun121:
Wickedness

US AND GUN
LIKE 5&6
But US government will focus on Africa and other countries
Awon Eleri Bu

When they formed America (US) as a country in 1700's, they clearly wrote in their constitution that all men are created equal.
At that time, Europe was still having monarchies (king, ,Queen, above the rest).
US people didn't want to hear that nonsense again. Everybody is equal and under the same law. No separate law for any special person.
(Just that they didn't consider black people as human beings).
Hence they carried their guns very well, to prove to each other, that if you dare misbehave or act superior, I just shoot you down.
Carrying and using guns will never leave their constitution.

ebubeson:
As a lady, you have the right to reject a man you don't want. You cannot be at the mercy of a man, and the fact you refused marrying a man does not mean you will suffer in life. Again, you can still reject a man and meet him very poor later in life.

But my advice:
(1) When rejecting a man, do not dehumanize him.
(2) Do not eat the sweat of a hustling man that intends to marry you, if you are truly not interested in him.
(3) It is a nice thing to marry a rich man, but go after him, enjoy the money, but do not go after the money.

Of course you can reject any man. Marriage is not slavery.
But do it fast and don't collect any gift from him.
Show it clearly that you don't like him from the start.
Don't sit down like a dirty swine, enjoying all his gifts and money and later reject him.

IjebuWarrior:
Mama, abeg go rest. What if ur daughter lay her hands on him nko? Wetin you go come do?

From the look of the video, she be single mother.

Useless mother...

The man made mistake. Never go for single mother anything.
It is the father that should be talking to the man.
Man to Man.

Ikpunnegi01:
Exactly what I told my in-law, any day you touch my sister, get ready to invite Army against me because police won't be enough for me..

Did you say that in public in front of all the wedding guests?
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Edit:
When you make this type of comment to your new inlaw, you are just displaying your own crasness.
You are basically THREATENINIG him that you have a contingency plan because YOU KNOW your own sister is SO STUPID and will DEFINITELY do a STUPID thing that will irritate the man so much, he will want to beat her up. She has done the stupid things already in your house and all of you know it.

Any family that knows their daughter is good, will never talk like this.
They will just say, "If you have any problems in your married life, just come and talk to us".

Who knows what stupidity the man is enduring from your sister now in his marriage now and regretting why he ever married her.

Abidele:
The responses show that the average Nigerian man is an abuser.
Smh

Travel to another country.

Connected1:
Why must it be in the public and not in private?

It shows how disrespectful the bride's family are.

The man should end the wedding now.
It has already failed.
Tomorrow that same mother-in-law will come and tell the man how many times he should sleep with his wife.
She won't mind her business in her own house and her own failed marriage.

DonroxyII:
Sense No go Kill Mama ....

If he Violate, Arrest am Straight !

And if SHE violates? What should happen?
Who is warning her now?

Lastmankc:
Leave her,you never jam .There are some women,that when you want to leave they we even lock the door so that you won't leave.

Then the man must stand his ground. That one has changed to kidnapping.
It's always a sad case for husband and wife matter to leave their private house and escape to the public/social media. Amebo people will always blame the man for everything

Kobojunkie:
Again, Sure, leave the woman. But here is the problem. The woman did do it. She wanted to have him punished for the crime. However, according to her, the DPO essentially coarsed her into not doing so. So, she does acknowledge a crime had been committed against her even though she backtracked probably after threats were thrown her way by some other bullies.

A crime was committed. Nigeria isn't the one that didn't punish the criminal. Rather, another crime was committed by the DPOs to keep the first crime from being punished. So, the woman in question does acknowledge the crime committed against her and would have preferred the man be jailed, not given a slap on the wrist as you keep insisting. The end!

The woman acknowledges husband's crime. - Story on social media.
Now, the DPO also committed crime by threat etc... - Why is she not acknowledging that one and going to SUPREME COURT to still UN-FORGIVE the man, arrest him and arrest DPO as well?
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A matter has been left. You leave the matter as well.
Beating cases will always be like this.
You think you have the DEFINITE answer to the problem (send the man to jail INSTANTLY).
But you don't have the answer.
Let them just END the marriage.
She divorce him, he divorce her, they both divorce each other.
And HE should have done this long ago, when she 1st, 2nd, 3rd... time began annoying him.
instead of letting it get this bad and messy.
May God save us from messy relationship...
A woman that a man will carry all his money and toast, buy cloth, buy shoe, buy gift.
... THE SAME woman that man loved so much will annoy him to the extent that he will beat her without regret?
What happened?
The man is at fault. But the woman is also very much at fault as well and let us not hide that part.

Kobojunkie:
Sure, leave the woman. But here is the problem. The woman did do it. She wanted to have him punished for the crime. However, according to her, the DPO essentially coarsed her into not doing so. So, she does acknowledge a crime had been committed against her even though she backtracked probably after threats were thrown her way by some other bullies.

Anyways ...

So if there is a crime and Nigeria does not punish the man, Do you want to personally go and find the man and jail him?
The person upon whom the crime was commited has let it go.
Should the man now go and STILL lock himself up in prison despite that?
As I said.
He should divorce and go.
The marriage HAS ended.

Kobojunkie:
1. Oh, he doesn't deserve to be jailed for committing a crime. He should instead be given divorce? So, if he had rendered her unconscious during the assault, we ought to simply offer him a divorce from her unconscious self? And, if another man comes by and pummels the same man in the same way, that man too does not deserve jail for that crime but should be released back into society where he can go on to commit more of the same crime.

2. So even if the woman decides [/b]he should be punished for the assault against her, it should not be jail?

3. So, we should consider the angry man's reason for committing a crime before we decide if he/she should be punished for said crime. A crime is not a crime at all?

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[b]SO IF HE HAD.

But this man did not.
You punish a person for the crime they commit. Not for the crime they COULD HAVE committed.
Leave the woman to take the decision, not yourself
Let the woman decide what it is.
All we can see here is a picture of a man who it is claimed, beat his wife. You don't have the details of the event.
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What you are trying to say here is that
1. A man gets angry at the wife >>> straight to Jail
2. A man shouted at the wife ->>> the same thing, Jail
3. A man slapped the wife - >>> jail.
4. A man woke up from sleep and started beating his wife - >> Jail.
5. A WOMAN PESTERED the hell out of a man. The man got angry and slapped her ->>> Jail for the man.
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You are pushing for same punishment for different crimes.
And I keep drawing the line.
All I can agree with is that the man definitely needs to separate/divorce the wife and not bother begging her again.
He is already broken and the marriage is ended.

allenpaul:
. Some of you came online feeling funky & sadistically judgemental as if you that's condemning women have a better life, were you in her shoes to know what she had been through nonsense

Some of you come online?
What of the woman that is online?
People just be talking and posting nonsense online and expect the whole world to agree with you.
The world is the world. People have different opinions.
Please respect that!.

The ones that married quick and bore 5 children are recieving beating from that VERY MAN that toasted them to marry.

Kobojunkie:
OK

2. At least we are on the same page that this man deserves to be in jail for laying hands on the woman, no matter the foolish reason he gave himself.

I didn't say he deserve's jail.
He surely deserves divorce/separation from the woman.
That one is clear.
As for jail, Let the woman make that opinion and decision.
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Angry men are not angry for NO reason. The woman did something which she and the public always like to hide/ignore as if it never happened.
She knows what she did.
That's why I said, let the opinion and decision of jail/arrest be left to the woman herself to make.

one4GOD:
suffering abuse with a man who you gave birth to 5kids, nah true, anyways I understand some women enjoy beating by their husbands as it's opportunity to buy them gifts, nonsense!!

They are both deceiving themselves.
They will both not change.
He will keep getting angry
She will keep irritating him to get angry.
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Before they married, he must have toasted her. She wasn't irritating him that time.
But a certain day came and she started doing something, whatever it was.
He should have called it quits right there and then. Instead of dragging on and on, losing his temper and eventually beating the woman.

Kobojunkie:
So, if I react by shooting you dead for this statement, it is reasonable to state it is a reaction to what you said?

2. So, in essence, the man beating her is a reasonable reaction to whatever it is the woman did?

3. Divorce should come after beating her and not before?

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Divorce should come before any beating.
He should not beat her at all.
Now he has beat her already, there is also no point begging her to come back. The marriage is already over.
For the case that the woman can get the man SO MAD that he either considers or totally commits to beating the woman, the marriage is already ended. (He's the one who toasted her before they married. And she definitely wasn't' irritating him that time)
He should have just separated/divorced.
He too was doing himself thinking, "I can bear it, I can bear it" until he finally lost his temper and beat her.
He cannot bear it (whatever the woman did to upset him). And should have sent her away instead of deceiving himself and getting his face plastered all over social media.

I want to ask O.
Has any thief in this Nigeria ever been caught after their face was recognised from CCTV?
Everybody's phone has 20 megapixel camera.
But the CCTV has 0.0005 megapixel camera.
How can the picture be sharp enough to recognise the faces?

ProtonX:
Said like a proper wife beater. Is provocation an excuse to hit someone? You've concluded the man might be a saint and it's the woman's behavior that warranted the beating? Are you normal? Did you take your meds today? Because you sound psychotic. You think your misogynistic views make sense? You should go see a psychiatrist because you're clearly sick in the head. A disgrace to real men. I only pity the woman who ends up with you.

You misread my post and have resulted in insults.
1. This man beat his wife for whatever reason. It is bad for her and for him.
2. The woman irritated the man.
3. This man should not get back together with this woman again. because she will irritate him over and over again.
1a - If the man was a saint, the woman would still do whatever she did to irritate the man. Because that is her behaviour.
2a - The saint man will not beat her. But the woman will still be doing that irritating thing, whatever it is.
In both cases, good man or bad man, he should still separate from the woman for his own sanity sake.
-That is what I said.
So where is the insult coming from?

Exceed15:
When you see a man beg his wife not to leave him in situation like this then he is guilty but when you see a man end a marriage by himself then the woman is really toxic. No man leaves a peaceful woman.

The man is guilty of losing his temper and beating the woman.
But the woman is very guilty of raising the man's temper in the first place.
He should either separate or divorce the woman so he doesn't get tempted to lose his temper again.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UjQnha99sTY&pp=ygUTYmlsbCBidXJyIG5vIHJlYXNvbg%3D%3D

Jman06:
So they should endure the beating from their "ideal men" and stop disturbing us

It's a very sad situation for a man to feel the need to beat the woman.
And it is a very sad situation for a woman to have a kind of behaviour that automatically triggers beating from a man.
Both people should separate from each other. Because they will continue to trigger each other.

Kobojunkie:
... and so it becomes ok for you to support men who violently assault and even verbally abuse women?

The man is doing that because he's reacting to something.
Even if the man was a pure angel, the same woman would display same behaviour that gets the guy upset.
And finally, he will divorce her (instead of beating).
Beating is bad. But beating will still not change the woman's behaviour.
So he should just divorce her fast and save himself from social media embarrassment.

Jman06:
But many of you ladies know and deliberately get yourselves involved with the wrong men for all the wrong reasons.

You turn down good men and follow jerks only to start complaining along the way.

They may not know, but they definitely will be displaying strong head.
Of what use is it to a "perfect" good guy, if the lady is displaying strong head for him daily?
His life will be miserable.
Fine, he won't beat her. But the marriage will sha still end in divorce.

Lastmankc:
Just pray you don't jam bad wife.You might be tempted to beat

That's the main thing.
Men expect their wife to be submissive. Once she is not, the man is tempted to beat.
Some will beat, others will not.
But in any case, the man will be sad for his actions.
The woman that was displaying strong head, will display it again!! And tempt the man Again.
So It's better the man just leave her. She will not change and he too will not change.

ud4u:
Woman should not tolerate men that beats them up, life has no duplicate

But they should automatically always be submissive to their husbands abi?
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Probably she wasn't showing that submission. Hence the man resorted to beating her.
In any case, even if she forgives him and the man also constrains himself,.... again she will display no submission and the man will beat again.
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So it's not only the man at fault.
Both of them are at fault with each other.
The man should leave her, because she is just going to tempt him again and again and again.

Alusiizizi:
Iron rods are actually quite useless when it comes to roads. What made those roads crack was thermal expansion. Under hot sun, the cement will expand, and since it has nowhere to expand to it will develop cracks, no matter how many iron rods that is in it.

Iron rods basically turn the road into a bridge resting on the ground. That's the purpose.
So the way they put expansion joint on bridges is the way they should put on the road.
And such a road will behave just like a bridge ie, NOT crack.
I don't know if these roads in the pictures had expansion joints. But without iron rods, concrete will crack due to bending forces from moving vehicles.

sonnie10:
But why is the one Dangote is doing along Oshodi Apapa road not like that?

There's iron rods in that one.
Iron rods add reinforcement to make the concrete stronger to take more load.
This one in the picture just looks like only cement without iron rods.
And the cement seems very light, maybe 50mm to 100mm thick. That thing will crack like breakable plate.

Ultimaximum:
This japa syndrome is evident of poor management of the economy.

It portends doom for Nigeria.

It's not today that Nigerians started japa-ing.
Since 70's 80's they've been doing it.
There used to be an advert on NTA in the 80's about a character called "Andrew".
And here are the words as I remember them,
Men, I'm checking out. We don't have light, water or .... something..
You can't even get good bottle of coca cola
... Then some other dude comes along, holds his shoulder and begs him not to leave Nigeria... be patriotic etc..
Andrew was played by Late Sir Enebeli Elebuwa.
Here is another recent version of that "type" of advert.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ygZ4QV3n5as

Omoawoke2:
When people say japa.
Do you mean just packing your load to enter a country you see white skin people without any agenda or plan for what you hope to achieve there?

Yes,
Abandon NIgeria, and just run to any country with white people.