₦airaland Forum

Jman06:
So all those ladies who lost their dads before marriage don't get married eventually

They get married, one way or the other.

But I feel the baby should know his or her dad, especially if the dad wishes to be part of his or her growing stages in life.
I don't support IVF of a stranger sha. It's unfair to the kid or kids.

lovelybugs:
If their father was dead will they not get married? Do orphans not get married?
You can easily get someone to represent the father .

Ok.

jhubril:
Especially ,for Yorubaland. Awon were

Not only in Yoruba land.

It happens in the east, south south, ..only very few families wish each other well.

codekanle:
but one is most important

My dear, all is most important

If I fall ill, and my man is not even around to check up on me? That's crazy? I won't forgive him, especially if we stay in the same Lagos..
Then I need pecks, hugs and kisses every week! It's important
I love company, even though u don't cook along with me, just be at home gisting with me

Then respect? I don't joke with it. My man cannot treat me like trash
I love kisses and the whole 10yards.
Then money is very important, if am broke..


So almost all goes with me, biko

Jman06:
@Victorian, single ladies can have kids if they want. But the truth is that it is not about having children but gold digging. There are many working class ladies who have kids through IVF or by getting a toy boy to impregnate them. That is better than being a second wife or side chick to a married man.

Even Linda Ikeji, I suspect seriously that she did IVF, because I don't think a lady of her class would stoup so low to get pregnant for a man before being married by him.

Please ladies, go for IVF instead of being a second wife. It is better!


Most polygamous homes are war fronts!

But if a lady goes for IVF, she trains d child well, he or she is all grown up and wants to get married. Who will stand as her father during traditional marriage?
Cause with white wedding, one can easily get away with it and hire any old man as her dad.. But in traditional marriage, u can't pull such stunts.
How do u go about it, as a mother?

All is important. I can't do without the other.

Jman06:
And you also support a man having side chicks even when his married??

I hope you don't expect fidelity from your husband

If my husband cheats on me, I won't kill him, neither will I break his head. I will ask him what's the problem? If the reason are not cogent enough and if I feel I can't stick with him? I will move on.
If it's something I can overlook, I will stay. It depends on his response.

segebase:
I would have married her then I wasn't ready

You've just hit the nail on the head

Most Nigerian guys are not ready to man up , woo and marry her. She can't be waiting on a Nigerian guy to summon up courage and woo her for marriage forever.

Nigerians guys can be confused when it comes to settling down with a rich lady or a lady from a rich home.. They are always dragging legs and no time to waste time.

funmisticqueen:
just close your eyes and put one foot in front of the other, the journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step.

Ok o.

funmisticqueen:
Dont be afraid, it will be alright my dear

This table u are shaking?

It's not that easy o.

funmisticqueen:
the same way they dont joke with their testicles sister the same way they dont joke with their testicles sister

Chai!

Sighs.

funmisticqueen:
let it be forever in his memory that you cant mess with some women

Na so

funmisticqueen:
do you remember the story of that ivie lady who was having marital issues with her husband till he beat her to a pulp, left her crippled with three kids and ran away to the US with his lover. how did she handle it? reported him to the embassy till they made him a fugitive and he came back online to beg. Now that is the kind of woman and payback i am talking about.

But he left her crippled nah!

Even beat her to a pulp

Lol, Mehn u like fight Abeg!

I won't allow any man manhandle this is my lovely skin.. For wetin Nah?

I don't joke with my skin and face o... Lol

funmisticqueen:
i will take something as a memento of the marriage like his testicles as he kick me out. like i said better a single mom than sharing a man with other women. i am his only option.

You go like fight o

Your blood just dey hot!

Just take it easy o. Don't loose your freedom cause of a man. It's not worth it.

funmisticqueen:
it is better to be a single mom than to be someone' s option which is what a second wife is.

If I were to choose, I prefer second wife than single mum

funmisticqueen:
I never said i was going to kill him, he would die of natural causes, maybe aids or hypertension or something. Read between the lines

Lol
My dad married 5 wives. He lived long till 90years old. He divorced one of his five wives when her wahala was too much for him to handle and drove her away, collected his kids from her. He was then left with four wives, who behaved themselves or else they are out.
He fulfiled all his responsibility as a father and husband. So if it were my dad, u won't succeed in killing him with high bp
Cause quickly he will cut u off and send you back to your parents.. Lol

Jman06:
LADIES, READ THE POST BELOW BY YOUR FELLOW WOMAN, CROSS THE Ts AND DOT THE Is, YOU WILL SEE WHY SOME MISGUIDED MEN THINK IT IS OKAY TO CHEAT ON THEIR WIVES.
IT STILL BAFFLES ME HOW A LADY WOULD ACCEPT TO BE A SECOND WIFE OR A SIDE CHICK TO A MARRIED MAN.
ANY SINGLE LADY WHO HAS EVER DATED A MARRIED MAN DOESN'T DESERVE A FAITHFUL MAN.


y
victorian(f): 6:06am
She must have gone through alot of lack and poverty for her to be grateful having a married man taking care of her needs.
There is no real difference between her and a man who married openly more than one wife. Look at Alafin of Oyo, he married so many wives and he's taking care of them well, none is complaining. They all have houses built on their names, buisnesses here there. The wives are happy, nothing like divorce in his home, all minding their own buisness but all taking good care of the king. Look at Mayweather, the boxer he has many wives And concubines abroad. None of them is complaining, none has divorced him. The Op should let the married man marry her properly and she will become second wife and stay on her lane. As long as the man still loves his wife at home and taking care of both their needs. I see nothing wrong in it. The men that married only one wife, no be divorce tomorrow, divorce today? Ordinary food sef, some cannot provide. Beating today, beating tomorrow.
Babe enjoy your life jare. There is no karma in this one, as long as she doesn't plan evil to his wife.

Yes o, jman06, there is nothing wrong in becoming a second wife. As long as the man can handle his home and wives well. And he takes good care of them. I don't support women who are waiting endlessly for a single guy till 60years old, dying single with no kid.

funmisticqueen:
i never said that a woman should allow a side chick or be a second wife. dont misquote me
i as the op will never allow a second wife into my home, all of the above will ensure of that. Marry me first and let me see you bring a second wife home and see if your lifespan wont cut in half. i will not need a knife for that sweetie.

At the bolded: then jail awaits u, smiling welcome to your new home my honey pie

You think it's so easy to kill and get away with it? Lol
Sighs anyways handle your home, the best way u feel.

franchasng:
you are a realistic lady while others are emotional and psychological thinking life cares, life don't care at all.

Who said life is black and white such that if u do good, good will follow u Na lie! Many good people end up not getting good things of life. If u want to be good, be good for goodness sake don't expect life to treat u kindly because u are good, it doesn't always work that way.

There are good ladies that end up marrying good men and live happy life while there are good ladies that end up marrying broke, horrible men and live hell like life on earth. Same applies to good men.

Whereas there are some bad ladies who we and society see as bad ladies but they end up marrying rich, awesome men and live happy life.

Life is not fair.

There are millions of intelligent, smart, hardworking people who are poor and jobless...some are working but very broke and unhappy.

While there are lazy, unintelligent, dull people that are very successful and rich.

That is life for u.

People say if as a single lady u sleep with married men, when u marry single ladies will be sleeping with your husband, na lie! Life don't work that way.

Some ladies married as virgins and their husbands still cheat on them with uncountable single girls, so what was their own crime

Don't mind them. They don't know anything.
One even said she will cut the life span of her husband if he cheats on her. And she forgets commiting man slaughter means several years in jail. As if e easy to just kill husband and she will go Scot free , then remarry again. Lol

While another lady here said, my friend who is 50years old, single with no kid is better off that way, than marrying a married man. How selfish can one be? And if the 50years old lady should send her child message, she wont allow her child run errands for her o.
Human beings are so selfish!
Anytime I look at my 50years old friend, all I feel towards her is pity. If she end up marrying a single man, I will be shocked, cos no single man in Nigeria will marry her, except she travels abroad. I pray she doesn't end up single till God knows when.

And Like u rightly said, life is not fair.

Treasuredlove:
he married openly...u just shredded all your arguments. Biko, what is wrong is wrong. He married openly meaning there was no kerewa involved and every party involved was aware.
There is no need justifying this
I just pity girls that indulge in this rubbish, just 2 years down the line their lives start falling all over the place. Like someone said, there is love in sharing but there is peace in having your own
Madam, your husband, his bank account and his penis can be a community project but normal people do not want such for their lives

If he marries her, there is nothing wrong in it. There are lots of women in the society married to married men. Alot of them.
My office neighbor, she was single til 35years.. Looking for a single man to marry but none fits her bill. Even her married boss wanted to marry her, back then. But she refused, saying she can never marry a married man. Now she is married to a married man, she got tired of waiting . She has three kids, she dress to kill.. Lol.. She looks very happy. She wears gold, when u see her with her children, u will just love them and respect her husband.
Shes been married for the past 5years. Working, doing well for herself. Even looking more prettier and more responsible.
My dear not every woman is destined to marry a single man
Time is going.. Biological clock is ticking.

I have another friend, she will be 50years, next month. Single , no kid and still waiting for a single man to marry her. Although she looks 42 but she's 50years old, still making Shakara.
I look at this lady and I marvel.


There is absolutely nothing wrong in it. My mum married my dad, a married man. They were together with other wives but different locations for the past 30years, before my dad passed away at age 90years . She didn't remarry until she passed away at 70years old. She was the most successful woman amongst her two other sisters that married single men. Her two younger sisters died of heart break, one was used for ritual by her single husband whom she loved with all her heart and The second sister died of suffering and poverty from her own husband.

They were all loyal to their husbands. But my mum lived longer than the two of them and lived life well, rosy than her two sisters who married single men.

Am not saying marrying single men is bad. But if your destiny falls on a married man, that sincerely loves u and stand by you? Go ahead, marry him for more respect than doing hide and seek games.

This life is not black and white.. It has so many colours attached to it with various curves.

omooba969:
U look Chinese too.

Lol.

I have a friend who travelled to China to hustle, came back with a Chinese lady . They are married . He brought her and his kids to Nigeria. They are living peacefully in Lagos.

She must have gone through alot of lack and poverty for her to be grateful having a married man taking care of her needs.
There is no real difference between her and a man who married openly more than one wife. Look at Alafin of Oyo, he married so many wives and he's taking care of them well, none is complaining. They all have houses built on their names, buisnesses here there. The wives are happy, nothing like divorce in his home, all minding their own buisness but all taking good care of the king. Look at Mayweather, the boxer he has many wives And concubines abroad. None of them is complaining, none has divorced him. The Op should let the married man marry her properly and she will become second wife and stay on her lane. As long as the man still loves his wife at home and taking care of both their needs. I see nothing wrong in it. The men that married only one wife, no be divorce tomorrow, divorce today? Ordinary food sef, some cannot provide. Beating today, beating tomorrow.
Babe enjoy your life jare. There is no karma in this one, as long as she doesn't plan evil to his wife.

She's beautiful

Benita27:
Those of you advising her to let him roam, are you all that selfish?. Clearly from your comments we could tell of your personalities offline. You're asking her to leave him and live her life to the fullest; how on earth will she live it to the fullest knowing her brother is roaming the streets eating from garbage?. She needs encouragement not discouragement.

It's a pity the Op is going through hell on earth. People saying she should allow him roam are not selfish or wicked.

When the Op doesn't have any money to spend again, and she's completely broke, to even pay house rent she can't even afford. And to eat, no more meals to provide. My dear, nobody will tell her to allow him roam.
Or will she start prostituting her body to make money to care for her brother, or go into armed robbery?
The best she can do now, before it gets to such pitiful level is to take him to powerful man of God for deliverance. The brother is under a spell.

My spec

northvietnam:
I love you as a kid... ND your mother deserves A Grammy....

Thank you.

Honestly she does. I love her die!

northvietnam:
did she force the girl...

let's be reasonable here with our judgement.

the girl willingly followed the man to such a place knowing fully well what's gonna be the out come if they get into such a place...

Did she shout During sex romp, NO

practically that means she is not a virgin and has been into such act with older people long before now..

I blame the family

way back uni days for Lodge, we know small small girls around wey Don tear yansh finish na.. but their Parents thinks they are decent virgins..

You are right.

In a market place and she didn't scream.

Smhhhhh

Which means she was enjoying it.. If not for the security guards, he would have completed two or three rounds on her.

Smmmhhh.

Rape indeed!




At a very little age, when a man beckoned on me to come to him, I use my finger, and tell him he is mad, then I will run as fast as my legs will carry me, straight to my mum, telling her with bated breathe that a man said I should come to him.
The useless man, ran after me.. He bumped straight to my mum, he was shocked and my mum said Mr man, can I help u? I shouted mummy, he's the man that said I should come. My mum eyes were glittering with anger. She looked at him, what do u want my daughter for? Why tell her to come to u? Lol. The man started to stammer that ehmmm, he just wanted to dash me somethings. Lol
My mum replied, what? Say it again! Dash this lil girl what exactly? Do u know her before?
My mum was fire when I was so young. She protected me like crazy against men. And am happy she did.

She was my Tarzan!

Truthsweet:
lol....funny enough, your judgement is here, no pardon believe me.

you shall be mocked , remember you judged yourself so take corrections, next time might be more fatal.

Amen.

What's this one saying?

Tinubu! Na WA o
Are you God?

But Ambode is working well.

She's confused and secretly crushing on Davido

The signs are there already.

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
Hope you know if ladies get financial independence like this woman most of them would choose not to marry. Damn no wonder men kept women out of affairs for a very long time until early feminists decided to fight for their rights.

If women were very rich like Linda. Most women will not marry. They will rather have kids. That's the reality. But men won't understand, they think women just want to bear Mrs.. Lol

The name Linda Ikeji open more financial doors in buisnesses and carries weight than I am Mrs Lagbaja. That's life.
If Linda Ikeji walks into a company where there are lots of queues, clients waiting. Am telling you, the manager of that branch will quickly rush to her and usher her through the queue while others who have been waiting for hours, continue to wait, while her request is attended to immediately. That's just life.

She carries alot of weight in money and recognition.

cruchenutii:
All that one is format o, when she marry him naw. She will add two Zeros miraculously, from 300 to 30,000. Him eyes go clear by force.

Thank God u can foresee the future on this babe!

Any man who believes her and marry her cos of this cunning strategy, enter one chance, that only White garment churches and TB Joshua combined can save him from her claws at the end .

Cunning woman.

I don't blame her.. As guys are scared of getting married, she has to strategy her own ,to get a man to marry her sharply.

As my uncle will always say : there are so many ways of catching a rat!

Too much sense will not kill him