I am shocked that many Nigerian see the question "How was your night?" a problem. I use it a lot and I am yet to come across objections. I fell in love with that question when I heard kenny Rogers' song "She believes in me". In the song, Kenny just came back from a stay-out-late-at-night-and-play-my-song and his lady woke up "and quietly she says how was your night?". Was he expecting Kenny to say he had bad or good fun making---love with his guitar? Why do some Nigerian think rotten all the time?

may be we should stop saying good night :

because not everybody is married!
because not everybody is in good terms with their mate!
because not everybody enjoys s..e..x!
because the word night means s..e..x!
because some literate illiterates are Nigerians

Please, is it also bad ti tell someone "Have a nice night?"

Nice and good, are they synonyms ?- I mean like saying nice food or good food? any thing wrong with that?

I smell Awake August 2007 issue - Published by Jehovah's Witnesses

Hello all,
You may wish to join the "Nigerian Data Analysts" group on linkedin. This group is for practicing & would be data analysts in all fields or work. The group welcomes contributions that furthers the interest of data analysis in Nigeria. knowledge Sharing, software reviews, training opportunities, best practice, questions & answers related to data analysis are welcomed. click to see http://www.linkedin.com/groups/Nigerian-Data-Analysts-4727019?gid=4727019&report%2Esuccess=7GcSc9MenMD5-zxa-kN_TToM-x5janvu_HMEw0LwSaLTiMXToFk2hhLiKanEipLCLCi2aHOMY2Q0YQnTDIu0oJnh-x5wKBYTHQ

This is a waiting lines (Queuing) Problem and from a business perspective, I would want to advice a least cost approach.

1. Companies should outsource at least 30% of there work to work-at-home staff. If you match income with efficiency and result, work-at-home staff may perform better than office place workers. you have BBs to send mails and get alerts for work to be do. There is also the Call-User-Group service to limit cost of calls.

2.Schedule different work resumption times for groups of workers. I don't see why we cannot do for six(6) hours what we are currently doing for eight( hours or more in our offices. work hours can come to six hours a day and resumption groups could be 8am to 3pm and 10am to 4pm. if 60 percent of white collar businesses do this, just imagine the effect on traffic. Each group closes at a time where traffic is minimal and have at least 2hours to get home. Market workers have 6pm to whatever time to get home too.

3. Government should build more schools in areas like Ajah, Badore, along and to Epe to increase proximity to schools. In our days, we walked to school - did not need cars on the road to take us to school.

4.Create side-attractions at toll-gates. Should there be a wait, them make the wait pleasurable. Control road traffic with number of toll-gate lane so as to have a pleasurable wait at toll-gate and a smooth traffic-free ride afterwards.

I love this woman. I am also one who wish Nigerian oil dries up today today. If I were president, fuel will be given out free to Nigerian untill it dries up. Bill Clinton once said it that no oil economy is a developed economy in the world. They are all consumer nations. For those who know the Economics, you well remember the Oil wealth illusion syndrome - a study that shows that why oil economy seem to have the wealth of oil, they lack the supposed development that should come from it. On the long-run, they become poor economies.

I prefer state of birth to state of residence.

Also, I support the development of Pigeon English as our National language - widely spoken and understood. It only needs to be standardized.

Many of the comments here remind me of the song below

"I'd Rather" – Luther Vandross

I thought sometime alone
was what we really needed
you said this time would hurt more than it helps
but I couldn't see that
I thought it was the end
of a beautiful story
and so I left the one I loved at home to be alone (alone)
and I tried and found
out this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you
I know better now
and I've had a change of heart

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
whoo-oo-oo-oo yeah

And then I met someone
and thought she could replace you
we got along just fine
but wasted time because she was not you
we had a lot of fun
though we knew we were faking
love was not impressed with our connection built on lies, all lies
so I'm here cause I found this one thing is true
that I'm nothing without you
I know better now
and I've had a change of heart

I'd rather have bad times with you, than good times with someone else
I'd rather be beside you in a storm, than safe and warm by myself
I'd rather have hard times together, than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
who holds my heart

I can't blame you if you turn away from me, like I've done you,
I can only prove the things I say with time,
please be mine,

I'd rather have bad times with (please be mine) you,
than good times with someone else (I know)
I'd rather be beside you in a storm (anytime),
than safe and warm by myself (so sure baby)
I'd rather have hard times to gether,
than to have it easy apart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart (my heart)

I'd rather have bad times with you (surely),
than good times with someone else (surely)
I'd rather be beside you in a storm (oh yeah),
than safe and warm by myself (all by myself)
I'd rather have hard times together,
than to have it easy apart (you know it)
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart

I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
I'd rather have the one who holds my heart
whoooo.....who holds my heart

vivid gate:

That makes us 2

That make 3 of us. I even shave without a mirror.

wife is beautiful + you love your children + wife even initiates s_e.x. all these should make a man attracted to a wife. My thinking therefore is that there are things he get outside that he cannot request from his wife e.g d_oggyStyle,B_j.obs or two or more girls at at time or some other stupid things.
Also,sleeping around with girls before marriage spoils a lot. you get used to not being satisfied with one person. Solution, Read God's Word - The Holy Bible Daily. A relationship with God will help.

Horrible bosses! hard to please. Those who say they have never been under a boss and have their own company are likely horrible boss too.

I am a fan of Microsoft Office and a certified Microsoft Office specialist for Access and Excel 2007 version. I extensively use Excel and Access using VBA for automation. I can say if i will find such functionality in OpenOffice. I did install openoffice once but the interface were discouraging.

I don't want to appear biased but Microsoft has enchanted me and I think its for life. i am a Microsoft Office Advocate. obssession you may call it.

Fish head

I will put it in three reasons

1. Maths teachers without a passion to teach maths

2. Poor foundation Knowledge of Maths (First principles matter a lot)

3. Lack of Mathematical application in the real life of work.

For me, I love maths. I see maths in Everything. life to me is a mathematical model. And no wonder, majority of Nigerians are bad managers - because, if you cannot measure it, you hell cannot manage it. I see maths in everything.

How does a woman know how much salt should go into a defined quantity of soup - I see Mathematical Proportion, Ratios, percentage

How much fuel will take you to a defined destination - I see differentiation (rate of change), Algebra

How does a bricklayer define how many block to use for a certain task - I see geometry

How much food will satisfy you - I see solids, volume and capacity.

how does God attend to our many prayers, hear them and respond to them - I see equations of more than 2 variables

Maths is all around us.

Here are three success tips for mastering mathematics

1. Start with Jss1 New General Mathematics (forget whether you a masters degree holder in a non mathematical discipline)

2. Solve all questions in the Exercises given. If you find any difficult, ask someone who love maths - family member, church member etc
3. Make sure you read upto JSS3 New General Mathematics. Thats just enough to pull you through the world of mathematics

Other suggestions will be to read a foreign textbook on secondary mathematics - their illustrations will make you love maths. Also, the internet is a terrible source of wonderful tutorials. Rather than facebook with your BBs, go to youtube and learn from videos.

Sorry, I saw this very late. I am in Lagos and should you still need the training, contact me at otog_ca@hotmail.com or call 08056654433. I am a certified Microsoft Office Specialist for Excel 2007 and Access 2007.

See same data on Excel spreadsheet - Graphic Presentation. download to view

I heard Church bells ringing
I heard A choir singing
I saw my love Walk down The aisle
On her finger He placed a ring

Oooh, oh I saw them Holding hands
She was Standing there with my man
I heard Them promise
Til death do Us part
Each word Was a pain In my heart

All I could do All I could do Was cry
All I could do Was cry
I was Losing the man That I love
And all I could do Was cry

And now The wedding Is over
The rice, rice Has been Thrown over Their heads
For them life Has just begun
But mine Is ending

Ooh All I could do All I could do Was cry
All I could do Was cry
I was losing The man That I love
And all I could do Was cry

If i were president, he will be my Foreign Affairs Minister. In fact I will want him to visit the US and make a speech to the senators there. Although I doubt if any will still be seated at the end of the speech. The must have been blown home by the grammar.

Sorry I did not see this back then.
Just incase you still need an expert in MS Excel, Access or Project. I am available. I am a Certified Microsoft Specialist (From Microsoft USA) and have over 8 years experience working with there applications. I am proficient with VBA just in case thing go advanced. You can reach me at otog_ca@hotmail.com.

Tolu,
Can you please lead me to your organizations?
drop a mail otog_ca@hotmail.com

Tolu,
I am happy you have begun your journy into one of the most productive tools in Excel. I tell you the, in my current organization, the procurement department enters Purchase Order list manually and it takes them hours to complet entries of purchase orders. With VBA/Excel, they now do it in less than one minute (Sincerely) the code extracts the purchase order details and create a list of all items, making it ready for instant upload to the database.

However, the code was not recorded. it was hand coded. that is why I say that the rcording level, though powerful, have limits to contending with data challenges.

If you do not mind having it in Microsoft Excel or Access 2007 or higher version, I can do it for you.

It will have the following:

[list]
[li]Navigation buttons that takes you to proforma invoice, payment invoice, table of paid invoices etc with clicks[/li]
[li]Dynamic analysis of invoice by dates, weeks, months and quarterly[/li]
[li]Entry Forms for data entries[/li]
[li]Exporting filtered data to new excel files[/li]
[li]Checks to avoid error entries and more[/li]
[/list]

Microsoft Excel or Access with VBA will be the tools for development

2348095599350 or data.charlie@yahoo.com

On pay cuts.
let us not be deceived that the more Naira (Quantity of Money) we have as individuals, the better for us. Rather the more value the Naira gets (Quality of Money), the better for us. Put simply, if we can buy more with less, the better for us.

If madam Finance Minister, along with cuts on recurrent expenditure is going to put in place strategies to improve the value of the Naira, then we should be happy with her coming.

Also, can the government put in place some price control policies with regards to consumer products/services? if people spend less in consumables, they can afford to pay for other necessities. transport fairs, rents, education and health-care are taking too much from the pockets of Nigerians. Government should find a strategy around these economic vampires.

I do not subscribe to pay increases as a solution to improving the lot of the common man.

On Fuel Subsidy.
Transportation cost has been the main factor in high prices of consumer products in Nigeria. I do not see it wise to remove fuel subsidies. Expense on Fuel subsidies should be seen as an investment on development. Fuel prices influences everything down to the cost of the food we eat. Dr Ngozi should rethink this aspect of her strategy.

I would have love this guy to be our minister for foreign affairs. make e dey speak oyibo to all those oyibo people.

These sites my interest both parties in the quest for the origin of life

http://www.watchtower.org/e/201011a/article_01.htm

http://www.watchtower.org/e/200609a/article_01.htm

http://www.watchtower.org/e/20040122a/article_01.htm

To settle this issue, first request for your statement of Account. with it you can track your deposits and withdrawals. if any unknown charges are stated, seek a rep from the bank to explain. you can then kill someone with the unexplainables

Project 1

An online database for road safety that will do the following
[list]
[li]View number of road accidents[/li]
[li] Access to quick identification of accident victims[/li]
[li] Show travelers data supplied from manifests by transporters[/li]
[li] Access these information via internet[/li]
[li] and any more[/li]
[/list]


Project 2

An online database for collecting information via sms on areas in Nigeria with poor electricity supply
[list]
[li]View statistics of worse hit areas[/li]
[li] Monitor the effectiveness of the efforts of government on electricity[/li]
[li] Possibly receive complaints related to electricity[/li]
[li] and any more[/li]
[/list]

Programing What?
With what application(s)?

I am a Certified Microsoft Office Specialist in:

Microsoft Excel 2007.

Microsoft Access 2007.

I am also into Visual Basic for Applications (VBA) - used for further manipulation and development of Excel and Access Application.

I have over 8 years experience with MS Excel and MS Access with multinational work organizations.


I Use this medium to invite persons (especially workers) having data related issues with Microsoft Excel (2003,2007 or 2010 versions) to reach me with the issues. If its going to take me less than 30min to fix it, I will do it for free. (Most issues take less than 30min to fix. Some less than a minute)

I will be willing to give assistance in issues relating to:

Excel formulas/Functions.
Create Macros or VBA codes for simple data task.(It has to be a simple task, else you pay a fee)
Give advise on data presentation and analysis strategies.
Tell the possibles and impossibles with MS Excel.
handle glitches in Excel Applications.
ETC.

If you got a problem that will be understood clearer with real data on an excel file and the problem involves sensitive data, just create a sample sheet with similar data/structure and send to me so I can come up with a fix.

Just reach me on anything Excel ( or Access).

Contacts
Phone: 08095599350
Email: otog_ca@hotmail.com