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My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons - Family - Nairaland

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My Wife Is Threatening To Leave If I Can't Find Job / She Threaten 2 Divorce Me If I Dont Dissociate Myself From My Best Friend. / My Nigerian Husband Will Not Divorce Me (2) (3) (4)

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My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Angelahoney: 10:58pm On Oct 05, 2012
Hello Nlanders. I have been hearing a lot about this site for a long time. I often visit this site but I've never been a member.
I have a problem with my marriage and I hope there are matured people who can help.
My husband of 5 years want to divorce me for trivial reason. It even sounds funny talking about it.

Last week he asked me to buy fresh catfish and goat meat. He said he wanted to eat catfish pepper soup, while I prepare egusi soup with the goat meat. I wanted something different so I prepared goat meat pepper soup and used the cat fish for egusi soup.
His inlaws came and they enjoyed it. But my husband was frowning. He said I'm too stuborn and he refused to talk to me. He has refused to sleep with me. I can't go a week without his sensual touch. To crown it all, he's threatening for a divorce. What do I do?

Pls your advice is needed. Thank. (I'm still pretty and marketable but he doesn't appreciate that).
Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by seunpayne(m): 11:06pm On Oct 05, 2012
Well...there are always two sides to a coin. Perhaps there is an underlying issue because like you said, this is way to trivial and since you didn't mention him being immature then I think this is bigger than just food.

Without his touch for a week? Too much information.

Marketable? You think you can do better than him? Are you already considering the divorce?

Madam please have a heart to heart with your husband and save your marriage. Some women are wondering where their husband ate and why they are never hungry when they come home.

12 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by 190: 11:12pm On Oct 05, 2012
Angelahoney: Hi Nlanders. I have been hearing a lot about this site for a long time. I often visit this site but I've never been a member.
I have a problem with my marriage and I hope there are matured people who can help.
My husband of 5 years want to divorce me for trivial reason. It even sounds funny talking about it.

Last week he asked me to buy fresh catfish and goat men. He said he wanted to eat catfish pepper soup, while I prepare egusi soup with the goat meat. I wanted something different so I prepared goat meat pepper soup and used the cat fish for egusi soup.
His inlaws came and they enjoyed it. But my husband was frowning. He said I'm too stuborn and he refused to talk to me. He has refused to sleep with me. I can't go a week without his sensual touch. To crown it all, he's threatening for a divorce. What do I do?

Pls your advice is needed. Thank. (I'm still pretty and marketable but he doesn't appreciate that).


But wait ooh woman why would you prepare CATFISH for egusi, dont u know that fish isnt good for soups
what kinda woman are you, he told you wat he wanted and yet you went ahead and did waht you wanted without his knowledge
nor be him give you money take buy the things, if he goes out and eat EGUSI and Goat meat in another girl's house
you'l come baq here and cry FOUL, u better go baq and apologize to him cos if u were my wife


Na FAN BELT i go take WIPE your NYASH PEEL angry angry angry

39 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by mspookie: 11:15pm On Oct 05, 2012
ASAP, serve him catfish pepper soup then go on ur knees n ask for a 2nd chance.

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by 190: 11:23pm On Oct 05, 2012
ms pookie: ASAP, serve him catfish pepper soup then go on ur knees n ask for a 2nd chance.


can i eat your specially prepared cat fish pepper soup embarassed embarassed
Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by weaseloo: 11:55pm On Oct 05, 2012
@OP
Why not prepare it the way he wants it? Afterall he asked you to buy the cat fish and goat meat.
Let's say it was your father that asked you, will you not do it the way he asked you to? ? ?
You have to be prepared to be on the giving end of a relationship especially in marriage.
Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Angelahoney: 12:01am On Oct 06, 2012
Most of the people commenting are men so it is one sided. I want a lady's opinion.
Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Angelahoney: 12:05am On Oct 06, 2012
Men in NL sometimes act as boys. What is the sense in kneeling down and serving him?

Humility is not by outward display. Ps act as real men.

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by eduson002(m): 12:21am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney: Men in NL sometimes act as boys. What is the sense in kneeling down and serving him?

Humility is not by outward display. Ps act as real men.
U er indeed obstinate

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Angelahoney: 12:37am On Oct 06, 2012
eduson002: U er indeed obstinate

No I'm not. I'm as logical as you. Fact is many men think they're the only ones who can reason. They see women are emotional beings. But I expected my husband to ask me why I decided to use cat fish to cook egusi soup instead of goat meat.

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by eduson002(m): 12:58am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney:

No I'm not. I'm as logical as you. Fact is many men think they're the only ones who can reason. They see women are emotional beings. But I expected my husband to ask me why I decided to use cat fish to cook egusi soup instead of goat meat.
For what he wants to eat?

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by omosexy1: 1:19am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney:

No I'm not. I'm as logical as you. Fact is many men think they're the only ones who can reason. They see women are emotional beings. But I expected my husband to ask me why I decided to use cat fish to cook egusi soup instead of goat meat.

Many women think men can assume what they (women) think. Why would you expect your husband to ask you why you used the catfish for egusi soup. I think this is your problem with him. They are not petty things but very serious. Your actions are threatening his authority in your home. You better apologise and stick to your role as a woman since you know you cannot do without his touch for 1 week.

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Nobody: 1:34am On Oct 06, 2012
I don't understand, he had made specific request about what he wanted you to buy and what he wanted to eat and you agreed, then you just switched things up without letting him know. It's not like it would have been any extra work for you to put the catfish in the pepper soup and the goat meat in the egusi. If you wanted to eat something different, you could have separated a portion of the food for yourself and made what you want. I wonder if examining your heart for the real reason why you decided to change the food won't lead you to the reason he is talking divorce.

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by mspookie: 1:50am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney: Men in NL sometimes act as boys. What is the sense in kneeling down and serving him?

Humility is not by outward display. Ps act as real men.


Have u heard about D virtuous woman?

2 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by mspookie: 1:54am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney:

No I'm not. I'm as logical as you. Fact is many men think they're the only ones who can reason. They see women are emotional beings. But I expected my husband to ask me why I decided to use cat fish to cook egusi soup instead of goat meat.
Someone is about to read her husband her human rights.
Has dis attitude worked for u?
Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by proudlyafrican(m): 1:59am On Oct 06, 2012
@OP your husband reasons are not petty as you have mentioned but weighty on his mind, i will advice that you look at this issue from that perspective otherwise the problem will linger on up until he finally throws in the towel.The fundamental truth is you have to learn how to communicate with your hubby,you have one thousand and one reason why you switched the goat meat for catfish pepper soup.In your thinking your reasons are perfect but did you know that your husband has also one thousand and one reason for his request which is also perfect to him.You should have communicated with him and let the superior argument/reason take the lead. The fact is, you have made a mistake simply tender an apology to him and move ahead with your relationship.Please,forget your in-laws who enjoyed the meal,they are gone now and you are missing the wonderful touch of your hubby,so it is your husband FIRST and in-laws SECOND.

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by obowunmi(m): 3:07am On Oct 06, 2012
Divorce over catfish and pepper soup??

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Mrsmansson(f): 8:46am On Oct 06, 2012
Madam this issue didnt just start from the catfish,if u keep seeing tins in the home as a small issue its going to keep upsetting him.i personally dont like fish in a soup especially when its not dried.so pls try and do d little tins he asked for just as exactly as he wants.initially i was doing that to my hubby like he kept on telling me stop wearing undies when sleeping close to him,he was feeling i wasnt free with him i took it as a liitle deal and kept on doing it,till he really got mad.so pls if u can still prepare the soup just exactly as he wanted it,things will resolve sharp sharp

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by slimyem: 8:59am On Oct 06, 2012
All i see here is a woman who has been disobeying her husband for a long time.
I'd suppose the catfish and goatmeat issue is not the first and your husband is getting fed up of giving simple instrutions and having them trashed for no particular reason.
Like someone already said...you are threatening his authority in the home..Amend your ways!!

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Angelahoney: 9:18am On Oct 06, 2012
slimyem: All i see here is a woman who has been disobeying her husband for a long time.
I'd suppose the catfish and goatmeat issue is not the first and your husband is getting fed up of giving simple instrutions and having them trashed for no particular reason.
Like someone already said...you are threatening his authority in the home..Amend your ways!!

Already passing judgment. I tot someone would support me.
Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by slimyem: 9:26am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney:

Already passing judgment. I tot someone would support me.
judgement?
Really?
What do you interprete "i'd suppose" as?
What you said in your post is not enough to believe your husband wants divorce just cuz you cooked catfish in place of goatmeat and vice-versa.
There must be underlying issues which you have failed to mention and which i assumed.
Are you here for support or solution to the issue at hand?
Sounds to me like the divorce thing is appealing to you sef....

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Mrsmansson(f): 9:28am On Oct 06, 2012
[quote author=Angelahoney]

Already passing judgment. I tot someone would support me. [/really a
someone should support u?so u still dont get what everyone is saying.why did i even waste my time replying earlier on

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by taryour(f): 9:37am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney:

Already passing judgment. I tot someone would support me.

very unfortunately for you i wunt support you,i am a woman and i wish to tell you this to your face,with this attitude you are puttin up on this thread shows how sturborn you are,you have obviously been disobeyin your hubby long before now,you are even trying to justify your reasons,if u wanted somthing diffrent why dint u cook your own catfish with egusi separately and cook his own catfish pepersoup for him,all this could have been avoided if had simply done his wish. You are even talkin like you cant go on your knees and plead. Your hubby would not just for this reason alone want a divorce. Yes you are still marketable but i assure you of one thing AS SOON AS YOU ARE DIVORCED AND SINGLE,YOU ARE NO MORE MARKETABLE!!! you better wake up and wisen up,learn how to treat your husband as he should be treated before you become UNMARKETABLE....

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Nobody: 9:48am On Oct 06, 2012
I am sorry to say but you sound very silly and childish. Your husband is threatening to divorce you for your rudeness, I too know attitude and sturborness and you are here not to seek advice but look for support from faceless internet Nigerians.
I am a woman and I say you are silly, and shouldn't be married. It is a mans role to love it is yours to be submissive, he wants fish cook him fish, what's all the nonesense about

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Nobody: 10:38am On Oct 06, 2012
U said u wnt'd sum advise, now d advise is cumin u still wnt sum1 to support u.is lyk there is dis pride tin inside of u,since u cant apologise to him,den i gues ur cool wit d divorce ish. wat is hard in ''darling i'm sorry''. Pride goeth b4 a downfall.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Kobojunkie: 11:07am On Oct 06, 2012
Angelahoney: Hi Nlanders. I have been hearing a lot about this site for a long time. I often visit this site but I've never been a member.
I have a problem with my marriage and I hope there are matured people who can help.
My husband of 5 years want to divorce me for trivial reason. It even sounds funny talking about it.

Last week he asked me to buy fresh catfish and goat men. He said he wanted to eat catfish pepper soup, while I prepare egusi soup with the goat meat. I wanted something different so I prepared goat meat pepper soup and used the cat fish for egusi soup.
His inlaws came and they enjoyed it. But my husband was frowning. He said I'm too stuborn and he refused to talk to me. He has refused to sleep with me. I can't go a week without his sensual touch. To crown it all, he's threatening for a divorce. What do I do?

Pls your advice is needed. Thank. (I'm still pretty and marketable but he doesn't appreciate that).

a) Your story sounds ridiculous. If you need to make something up, you can definitely do a better job than the above. I mean "I can't go a week without his sensual touch" . . . where did you get that silly line from? A terrible Nollywood movie? Abeg . . stop watching all that trash and get you some good books to read.

b) You claim the husband in this scenario accuses the wife of being too stubborn. That is fine and well. Personally, I don't see any problem in the wife cooking what she did. I mean if the man really wanted to eat perppersoup and etc. surely he could have done it himself, if it meant that much to him to have it exactly as he wanted it. A wife is not a slave and a wife does not have to do exactly what a husband says. A wife is a partner and not a slave. So here we have a husband that may really feel it is OK to divorce on grounds that she didn't do exactly what he says, it might turn out for her own good.

c) As for the answer to the question of what to do, I say you think about what divorce and his threats really mean, If you don't want divorce, and you are willing to settle with the situation with the husband, then do what you have to, to maintain it. If however, you want chance and you are willing to accept the consequences that come with the change, go for it. This is your life.

3 Likes

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Flygeriansteve: 11:09am On Oct 06, 2012
undecided*goat men*? I wanted to advise you but then I thought what can a goatman know? Youre a subconscious misandrogynist.

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Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by arramyjay: 11:30am On Oct 06, 2012
He is very immature if he is asking for divorce over catfish pepper soup,do u hv a job? I say ignore him and concentrate on other things,be nice to him whtevr u do.waste no energy on him. Pls how old is ur husband?

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by arramyjay: 11:33am On Oct 06, 2012
debrief08: I am sorry to say but you sound very silly and childish. Your husband is threatening to divorce you for your rudeness, I too know attitude and sturborness and you are here not to seek advice but look for support from faceless internet Nigerians.
I am a woman and I say you are silly, and shouldn't be married. It is a mans role to love it is yours to be submissive, he wants fish cook him fish, what's all the nonesense about

Geez, u are what is wrong wit dis world. Her not cooking catfish pepper soup means she is nt submissive?

1 Like

Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by Truckpusher(m): 11:43am On Oct 06, 2012
The gentleman is tired of eating the same cumbis everyday so he wants a fresh cumbis like the freash cat fish.But if u want him to continue to hunger for your cumbis again then you have to improvise some styles that will bring him back and if you need help i can personally coach you here on NL grin grin grin grin grin grin
Re: My Husband Is Threatening To Divorce Me For Petty Reasons by WAM1(f): 11:45am On Oct 06, 2012
There is no taking sides here my sister- your husband is your crown. I know and understand what it is to be stubborn. It wouldn't take you to far. If you want your marriage- pick your battles. A man who threatens to divorce you over goat meat has been keeping quiet over several issues that seem trivial to you. My advice to you is to apologize sincerely and make things right asap however possible
.
In the long term- drop the stubbornness !!! If that man leaves you today - your life would not be the same . Forget that story about being marketable o- what would you tell the next man the reason for your divorce? Would he be ready to deal with your stubbornness?Don't put yourself in a vulnerable position.

Submission is key- he wants goat meat give him goat meat- or try asking if he minds cat fish- not outrightly disobeying him. How many times does he tell you what he wants in the food? If he requests it this time - give it to him. Don't mess up what you have- its not worth it.

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