Hello people, please give this guy a break, why would he cook up the story when its not affecting us in any way . The guy is looking for advice , if you have it give him some, if you dont then let him be. Tricktech, my advice to you is, if you really like this girl and you think there is a chance it might lead somewhere then let her know how you feel. I know you americans think Nigerians are gold diggers, i dont blame you for thinking so, but not all Nigerians are like that, there are still alot of good people here, I am a Nigerian and Proud to b one. From what you said i think she really really likes you, but because of being a christain and she is a female she decided not to take the first move which is only natural for we ladies here. for her not to come strongly on you it shows she is the moral and discilpned type hence i think you jsut got yourself a good woman. Please come and take charge of her heart before you loose it to someone else. Gracias...

Hello people, please give this guy a break, why would he cook up the story when its not affecting us in any way . The guy is looking for advice , if you have it give him some, if you dont then let him be. Tricktech, my advice to you is, if you really like this girl and you think there is a chance it might lead somewhere then let her know how you feel. I know you americans think Nigerians are gold diggers, i dont blame you for thinking so, but not all Nigerians are like that, there are still alot of good people here, I am a Nigerian and Proud to b one. From what you said i think she really really likes you, but because of being a christain and she is a female she decided not to take the first move which is only natural for we ladies here. for her not to come strongly on you it shows she is the moral and discilpned type hence i think you jsut got yourself a good woman. Please come and take charge of her heart before you loose it to someone else.

And that stuff you said '(God I miss her so much sad sad sad I could do so much for her. I really cared about her. I just want to tell her everything will be fine...that I am going to protect her and look after her forever. She and her family would never have to worry about anything ever again. She has no idea...it hurts so much sad sad sad ) , .... this is totally believable, its amzing to know guys still think this way towards girls, most guys are just jerks. you made tears come out from my eyes, its so sincere and i can tell its coming from a pure heart. This is exactly what you should tell her cos i know if i should hear this from a guy i liked or loved it would make me wake up everyday and fall in love with him over and over again each day. Infact you are not only different because your white ,but you are a different white guy, i hope u get me. You are a correct guy and am sure you would make a perfect guy for her and you wont break her heart. I pray it goes well for you too, please keep me posted on how it goes. Gracias...

TrickofTech: So I am from the US. I am white, male. I have just spent some months in Nigeria and I found Nigeria amazing! I really enjoyed it. Seeing the different cultures and the different way of life. I was great.

I was staying with a Nigerian family (Yoruba) and again...it was really cool. Thing is, the family had a daughter about 30 (a couple of years older than me). She is not really good looking, but ok, Born Again, and we seemed to get on really well. She was really friendly...and I slowly got the impression that she liked me (romantically). She would use any excuse to talk to me and was always coming to my room to chat. I really liked her too, straight away...but I never really did anything about it. Basically we just did this back and forth flirting type thing everyday...and that's how it stayed. I was very aware that her parents lived in the same house and I did not want to be disrespectful. On top of that...there is the whole cultural gap...I know quite a bit about Yoruba culture, but I am not sure how Nigerians approach courting and flirting and all that stuff.

Her family would often 'joke' (although I am not sure!) about us getting married...which was quite awkward. At times she seemed very interested in asking me "when will you marry?" and "would you marry a Nigerian?". Other times she said outright that it was not appropriate for her to marry a white person. When I left she said she would really really miss me...and has called me a lot since. She keeps asking to return to Nigeria.

I left Nigeria without telling her that I liked her a lot.
_________________________________________________________________

Thing is, I am not an mugu. I am aware of the film 'oyinbo hunters'! I know there are many Nigerian women after green cards and money! Also, I am not even sure if she really liked me romantically. Are women in Nigeria flirtatious generally? I could have just been mistaking her over-friendliness for romantic interest, although there were times which I was sure she fancied me. I am well aware that some Nigerians are intrigued by white people...and it could have just been that.

We were pretty close by the end of my time in Nigeria. I REALLY regret not telling her that I liked her...I just want her to know how beautiful (inside and out) I thought she was, even if she isn't interested.

I am glad at least we are friends for the moment. I would really like to see her again one day, although all I can think is that I will probably never see her again. I just wish I could have spent more time with her...talked to her some more.

Awwww. Just offer her a green card...you will see her pronto!

Good luck!

Mrs.Chima:


Awwww. Just offer her a green card...you will see her pronto!

Good luck!

That's great. But what does she want, ME or the GREEN CARD? I want to be with someone who wants me, I do not want to be someone's ticket to the west. I don't want to be used like that.

This is the thing that troubles me the most. It is not what people will think of me...for being with a Nigerian. It is not even that I would have to pay for her to come over and be with me.

It is that she really wants to come to the west. What kind of message does that send to me?: That she will go for the first guy that will offer her a green card. What about when she gets here?: Will she decide that now she has a green card, that she doesn't want to be with me anymore?

I do have very strong feelings for her...and I always will, but I just wish she had never mentioned her desire to come to the west. I know that perhaps she was just being honest and I cannot fault her for that, but it has tarnished my perception of what she really wants. I do not want to be used and hurt like that.

Sad as it sounds, but she might have got further if she had just lied to me about wanting to flee her home country and not mentioned it at all.

odikwa very serious...smh

my hearts beats for lola, sorry aurora ( season 2)

I hate it when y'all mention green card and U.S like that's heaven,its really annoying.Mrs Chima couldn't even think of any other thing to say.I'm not sure you'd do any better than the poor girl ur painting black. What's wrong if someone would like to visit someother part of the world and she says it. If that's gonna come with the love so be it,she's not gonna die if she doesn't get to marry you or go to the U.S .Save me the bullshit !

wahabian: I hate it when y'all mention green card and U.S like that's heaven,its really annoying.Mrs Chima couldn't even think of any other thing to say.I'm not sure you'd do any better than the poor girl ur painting black. What's wrong if someone would like to visit someother part of the world and she says it. If that's gonna come with the love so be it,she's not gonna die if she doesn't get to marry you or go to the U.S .Save me the bullshit !

I know, I know. I am not very trusting. I am coming to realize that there is a VAST difference between how westerners and Nigerians think. She was amazing, I had feelings for her, I am pretty sure that she had feelings for me. But there are so many ways in which we differ. Religion, attitudes to relationships, attitudes to society, attitudes to gender and elders (respect), attitudes to tolerance and other peoples beliefs and attitudes to child discipline. I did very well to FAKE and adapt to the Nigerian way of living, but in hindsight, I was not me and a lot of things she believed in, I did not.

She was fascinating, very attractive and full of joy. She had many strong qualities, but I guess I got so sucked in by that, I was prepared to ignore many of the things I believed. We are very different people and it would have never have worked.

(PS: The reason I have mentioned the 'green card' so much is because of my own insecurities. Before I traveled to Nigeria, I was aware of 'Oyinbo Hunters'. I kept telling myself that "I would not get involved with anyone because there is a risk they could just be hoping for a marriage/green card". Every time she mentioned travelling and wanting to leave Nigeria...it added to my suspicions of her intentions.)

Either way...I am glad I did not mention it. She is a really cool and an amazing Naija babe. If I had mentioned my feelings, it could have made things uncomfortable and ruined our friendship. So I am glad things have turned out like this. It would never have worked.

TrickofTech: So I am from the US. I am white, male. I have just spent some months in Nigeria and I found Nigeria amazing! I really enjoyed it. Seeing the different cultures and the different way of life. I was great.

I was staying with a Nigerian family (Yoruba) and again...it was really cool. Thing is, the family had a daughter about 30 (a couple of years older than me). She is not really good looking, but ok, Born Again, and we seemed to get on really well. She was really friendly...and I slowly got the impression that she liked me (romantically). She would use any excuse to talk to me and was always coming to my room to chat. I really liked her too, straight away...but I never really did anything about it. Basically we just did this back and forth flirting type thing everyday...and that's how it stayed. I was very aware that her parents lived in the same house and I did not want to be disrespectful. On top of that...there is the whole cultural gap...I know quite a bit about Yoruba culture, but I am not sure how Nigerians approach courting and flirting and all that stuff.

Her family would often 'joke' (although I am not sure!) about us getting married...which was quite awkward. At times she seemed very interested in asking me "when will you marry?" and "would you marry a Nigerian?". Other times she said outright that it was not appropriate for her to marry a white person. When I left she said she would really really miss me...and has called me a lot since. She keeps asking to return to Nigeria.

I left Nigeria without telling her that I liked her a lot.
_________________________________________________________________

Thing is, I am not an mugu. I am aware of the film 'oyinbo hunters'! I know there are many Nigerian women after green cards and money! Also, I am not even sure if she really liked me romantically. Are women in Nigeria flirtatious generally? I could have just been mistaking her over-friendliness for romantic interest, although there were times which I was sure she fancied me. I am well aware that some Nigerians are intrigued by white people...and it could have just been that.

We were pretty close by the end of my time in Nigeria. I REALLY regret not telling her that I liked her...I just want her to know how beautiful (inside and out) I thought she was, even if she isn't interested.

I am glad at least we are friends for the moment. I would really like to see her again one day, although all I can think is that I will probably never see her again. I just wish I could have spent more time with her...talked to her some more.

The OP is from Mbaise. Ogaghi ahogbuli anyi

carlos1:

The OP is from Mbaise. Ogaghi ahogbuli anyi

Eh? Kor yemi? I do not know that much Yoruba/Naija slang

sauceEEP: my hearts beats for lola, sorry aurora ( season 2)

lol

Its not a bad thing to date or marry the girl,it just freaks me out when everyone starts talking about green card.You can call her now and tell her how u feel,ask her if she feels same way(very simple) you'll know ђã†̥ next to do after that. There's nothing wrong in a Nigerian girl wanting to marry an Oyinbo or wanting to travel.We all have our fantasies.So please let everyone stop exaggerating it (green card).

If that doesn't do,apply for a Nigerian job as an expatriate(you'll get picked) and come settle in Nigeria.

i actually dont know why yall dwelling on him being an oyinbo like its some sorta big deal.

i do believe his story and will urge yall to address his concerns


@ TrickofTech,

i dont knw who she is but if a Nigerian girl likes you, its 60% sure its not cos of green card especially if shez a little comfortable here.

if you like her enuf. do the needful.


And...thanks for being open minded about Nigeria

TrickofTech: No friend. I am not lying. All of what I have said is true. Why would I want to make up something like this. It may not sound very believable, but it happened.

I am white American.

. Oya prove it...show us ur pic...today pic.

pretty kelz: Hello people, please give this guy a break, why would he cook up the story when its not affecting us in any way . The guy is looking for advice , if you have it give him some, if you dont then let him be. Tricktech, my advice to you is, if you really like this girl and you think there is a chance it might lead somewhere then let her know how you feel. I know you americans think Nigerians are gold diggers, i dont blame you for thinking so, but not all Nigerians are like that, there are still alot of good people here, I am a Nigerian and Proud to b one. From what you said i think she really really likes you, but because of being a christain and she is a female she decided not to take the first move which is only natural for we ladies here. for her not to come strongly on you it shows she is the moral and discilpned type hence i think you jsut got yourself a good woman. Please come and take charge of her heart before you loose it to someone else.

And that stuff you said '(God I miss her so much sad sad sad I could do so much for her. I really cared about her. I just want to tell her everything will be fine...that I am going to protect her and look after her forever. She and her family would never have to worry about anything ever again. She has no idea...it hurts so much sad sad sad ) , .... this is totally believable, its amzing to know guys still think this way towards girls, most guys are just jerks. you made tears come out from my eyes, its so sincere and i can tell its coming from a pure heart. This is exactly what you should tell her cos i know if i should hear this from a guy i liked or loved it would make me wake up everyday and fall in love with him over and over again each day. Infact you are not only different because your white ,but you are a different white guy, i hope u get me. You are a correct guy and am sure you would make a perfect guy for her and you wont break her heart. I pray it goes well for you too, please keep me posted on how it goes. Gracias...

. See your mouth read wat u wrote upside down..

I wonder how things turned out between Tech and his Yoruba 'crush'?

@op why can't you just upload your pics or put pix on your profile so we can believe all what you are saying.

prettythicksme:
@op why can't you just upload your pics or put pix on your profile so we can believe all what you are saying.

You need to read his posts on the last topic he posted. The dude just lost it like an hyperactive teenager. I think he couldn't fully relate with how most Naija babes relate with their male counterparts. Most of our babes don't say what's truly on their mind because of the culture and the fear of looking needy. And to make matters complex Tech's crush was a traditional Yoruba girl. I mean how complex can they get. Babes like these don't find it easy opening up to you.

wahabian:
I hate it when y'all mention green card and U.S like that's heaven,its really annoying.Mrs Chima couldn't even think of any other thing to say.I'm not sure you'd do any better than the poor girl ur painting black. What's wrong if someone would like to visit someother part of the world and she says it. If that's gonna come with the love so be it,she's not gonna die if she doesn't get to marry you or go to the U.S .Save me the bullshit !

what am I suppose to say I taya ooo

MrsChima:


what am I suppose to say I taya ooo

No be say anything;na the way u dey wash our country in front of oyinbo I no like.

Idowuogbo:
Lmaoooo! Mr man stop forming mehn.... Dis na story!!!! U and i know u black pass bance. U oyinbo? Or u mean black albino?

LWKMD 4 here ooo

Ended up reading this shit!! Rubbish... Wasted my time... Amaebo no go kill me...
Well let me leave u guys with this song!!

Lalalalala lalallalalala
Ur mother used to tell u,
ur father used to warn u
Lalalalala uhuhuhuhuh
Ur mother used to tell u
Ur father used to warn u




Now u don care belle uhuh Karr belle
Baby ur eye don clear..
Everytime u dey gbekale.. Hmmmm
Dedicated to all nairaland chicks

Seened:
I wonder how things turned out between Tech and his Yoruba 'crush'?

You know that I promised I would not post on here again!!!

I am fully prepared for a torrent of abuse from nairalanders. It is what I am used to!

Since posting last it has continued to go back and forth. Get hot. Then cold. Then freezing. It is still ongoing.


I have nothing against Nigerians. Nigeria culture. I am very fond of it. I have spent 3 months in your wonderful country and I loved every bit of the experience. As I have found, there are huge differences over things like courting and dating.

You see, where I am from. Acting the big man, flashing the cash, boasting, trying to manipulate and trick a woman, trying to bed women...THAT IS CHILDISH. It is seen as being the teenage behavior of a boy, not a man. Being open, honest, trusting, giving and loving...and being confident and self assured and secure doing it. THIS IS MANLY.

I was (and will always be) very fond of this Yoruba lady. I do not want to woo her. I do not want to entice her with money. I do not want to trick her into bed. I want her to see in me what I saw in her. A lovely and honest person that is attractive. She never needed to use any tricks with me. She did not need to seduce me. I loved her for who she was.

Yet despite all of this. To this day. She cannot be open with me. She cannot just relax on the phone and talk with me. Instead she plays these games of suggesting things...ignoring my calls and then calling me repeatedly when I try and move on. She tells me that she has a partner...but when I think "that means she is unavailable"...and try and move on. She begins to pursue me again!!!!!

These are just stupid childish games. I have a genuine care, love and respect for her. Not just as a woman, but as a person. Can you actually believe that she told me "you care too much for me" (like it was a bad thing!). Yet she still pursues me!

In my country, this kind of behavior means the following, she is not serious, she is childish, she likes attention, she is shallow, she is manipulative, she is insecure, she does not respect me.

And so it continues....

Most recently, I got angry that she asked me to call...and then ignored my calls. So I gave up. I did not try and call for a good two weeks. After 3 day, I began getting flashed by an unknown number. I tried to call her and she ignored my call again!

Eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Eya...after three years, I think I have broken her heart

What have I done? I am a terrible person.

TrickofTech:
Eya...after three years, I think I have broken her heart

What have I done? I am a terrible person.

Bros, having read all ur comments its now obvious and crystal clear that you are a Nigerian lying and pretending to be a white guy (even ur picture says it all)... Hmm I wonder if joblessness is the cause of this or wat exactly is ur gain in all dis drama cos I find it really hard to fathom.

And for the other people commenting and believing this guy, well I'd say it's a reflection of our society today where many are so gullible hence why 419 is so thriving in the country instead of truely examining information before believing them as expected of a truely educated and enlightened individual. Anyway common sense isn't common as the popular saying goes.

At this junction i rest my case, a word they say is enough for the wise. Thank You

TeejayMaya:


Bros, having read all ur comments its now obvious and crystal clear that you are a Nigerian lying and pretending to be a white guy (even ur picture says it all)... Hmm I wonder if joblessness is the cause of this or wat exactly is ur gain in all dis drama cos I find it really hard to fathom.

And for the other people commenting and believing this guy, well I'd say it's a reflection of our society today where many are so gullible hence why 419 is so thriving in the country instead of truely examining information before believing them as expected of a truely educated and enlightened individual. Anyway common sense isn't common as the popular saying goes.

At this junction i rest my case, a word they say is enough for the wise. Thank You

...at this point, I would prefer if this were the case.

She is going to hate me. Her family is going to hate me. How could I have been so stupid as to ruin those beautiful memories. I am a fool.